0bvious things you’ve only just realised (2019 edition)

[Small Man Big Horse]

IDSWYDTTYVMB

Having sat through a game of futebol earlier, it strikes me that extra time is a dark art which should be sacked off in favour of just stopping the clock when the play stops. Someone announced that there would be 4 mins of extra time, but the whistle didn't go until 95:37 or something. STOP THE GAME AT NINETY MJNUTES EXACTLY THANKS

Ah, but sometimes there's stoppages in extra time resulting in more extra time needed in extra time.

[Ferris]

Ah, but sometimes there's stoppages in extra time resulting in more extra time needed in extra time.

If only the officials had "watches" they could "stop" when there was a break in play, and then restart to ensure the regulation 90 minutes has been played. They could call them "stopwatches". Sadly, no such technology exists.

Smaller teams will just have to live with the structural disadvantage so that Financial Behemoth FC can save its blushes with a 98th minute penalty. This is all Good For The Game so that's a relief.

[Paul Calf]

not after you've been a kid in the corner shop-cum-video club

Do they let kids into cum-video clubs these days?

[petril]

IDSWYDTTYVMB

Having sat through a game of futebol earlier, it strikes me that extra time is a dark art which should be sacked off in favour of just stopping the clock when the play stops. Someone announced that there would be 4 mins of extra time, but the whistle didn't go until 95:37 or something. STOP THE GAME AT NINETY MJNUTES EXACTLY THANKS

aye, there's standardised amounts for substitutions and goals they're meant to add on, plus anything else that isn't really short. apart from that they'll generally wait until the ball's in a fairly safe area before actually blowing the final whistle, because no referee wants to be the next Clive Thomas.

best stoppage time related thing is in the second leg of a European tie where the goalkeeper wastes time over a goal kick and the ref has to run 40-odd yards to book him, and then add more time than was originally wasted for all that. One of the small joys of the game, that

[imitationleather]

If only the officials had "watches" they could "stop" when there was a break in play, and then restart to ensure the regulation 90 minutes has been played. They could call them "stopwatches". Sadly, no such technology exists.

Smaller teams will just have to live with the structural disadvantage so that Financial Behemoth FC can save its blushes with a 98th minute penalty. This is all Good For The Game so that's a relief.

They have considered stopping the clock whenever the ball goes out of play for decades now, but it's always been rejected as whenever they feed the data in to a super-computer it always says that if they did this an average ninety minute match would last for over eight hours.

[Replies From View]

They should have a situation whereby half the way through the "match" the "footballers" get to eat slices of "oranges".

[Paul Calf]

Have you always done double spaces after full stops?

Yes.

[Ferris]

They should have a situation whereby half the way through the "match" the "footballers" get to eat slices of "oranges".

Bit unrealistic. Come on now

[Replies From View]

Bit unrealistic. Come on now

I didn't say they had to be mid-90s CGI oranges.  I was thinking more along the lines of real oranges.

[Ferris]

I didn't say they had to be mid-90s CGI oranges.  I was thinking more along the lines of real oranges.

Heaping madness upon madness.

[kalowski]

In the Tom Waits' song, "I Can't Wait To Get Off Work (and See My Baby On Montgomery Avenue)" the line she'll be waiting up with a magazine for me refers to the woman reading a magazine whilst she waits, and not that she's waiting for Waits with a magazine she's going to give to him. I always thought that was weird. "I can't wait to see my baby, she's got a magazine for me."

[Paul Calf]

I think it's a bit odd that a baby is reading a magazine while awaiting Waits. That's one clever baby.

[NoSleep]

It is Tom Waits' baby. I was wondering about the magazine; bit risky to leave a baby with a loaded gun?

[touchingcloth]

Magazines were granaries before they became weaponised, just to extend this baby fun.

On the subject of suicide doors, I noticed today while getting my English car ready to sell that it has a switch hidden behind the door that can be used to turn the airbag off. I might disable it, depending on how much I like the buyer.

[NoSleep]

Magazines were granaries before they became weaponised, just to extend this baby fun.

Whilst a rolled-up magazine makes an effective weapon I can't see it holding much grain.

[pigamus]

Probably obvious to anyone who's ever heard of them, but in Stand and Deliver - the song, I mean - the thing after "clumsy boots" is "peek-a-boo roots". Whatever they are.

[Replies From View]

Whilst a rolled-up magazine makes an effective weapon I can't see it holding much grain.

Not even between the pages?  You just need to carry it carefully, that's all.

[Replies From View]

Probably obvious to anyone who's ever heard of them, but in Stand and Deliver - the song, I mean - the thing after "clumsy boots" is "peek-a-boo roots". Whatever they are.

There's someone in this thread who thinks it's "Pikachu roots".

(Apparently that's the name of a tamagotchi or something.)

[buzby]

On the subject of suicide doors, I noticed today while getting my English car ready to sell that it has a switch hidden behind the door that can be used to turn the airbag off. I might disable it, depending on how much I like the buyer.

It's so that if you have a rearward facing baby seat in the front passenger seat and you are in a crash the airbag doesn't go off and smash the baby's skull like an egg

Probably obvious to anyone who's ever heard of them, but in Stand and Deliver - the song, I mean - the thing after "clumsy boots" is "peek-a-boo roots". Whatever they are.

Natural hair colour coming through at the roots as the dyed hair grows out:

[Replies From View]

You said egg


I like to call peek-a-boo roots "the unwiped anus of the hair".

[Sebastian Cobb]

Annual confusion as to why a bunch of septics are all talking about Jon Snow only to realise they mean the one in that show about hobbits and tits rather than the news presenter.

[NoSleep]

Not even between the pages?  You just need to carry it carefully, that's all.

Will it hold sufficient grain to see us through winter?

[olliebean]

Natural hair colour coming through at the roots as the dyed hair grows out

That's just roots, isn't it? I've heard people say stuff like "Your roots are showing" or "I need to do my roots" but I've never heard it called peek-a-boo roots. Is that a millennial thing? Seems like the sort of craply twee thing they'd say.

[buzby]

That's just roots, isn't it? I've heard people say stuff like "Your roots are showing" or "I need to do my roots" but I've never heard it called peek-a-boo roots. Is that a millennial thing? Seems like the sort of craply twee thing they'd say.

Adam Ant was not a Millenial (and the lyrics use the term in a mocking sense),

I'm the dandy highwayman
So sick of easy fashion
The clumsy boots, peekaboo roots
That people think so dashing
So what's the point of robbery
When nothing is worth taking?
It's kind of tough to tell a scruff
The big mistake he's making

However, it seems Millenials have picked up on his lyrics since the 'Rainbow Brite'-style hair dyeing styles came into fashion.

[olliebean]

Bloody hell. Says something about my musical taste that in my head that always went "The Gohill's boots and fading roots that people think so dashing."

[pigamus]

"But like Cherry Coke, walls come tumbling down"

[Uncle TechTip]

The lyric is "those clumsy boots become a ruse that people think so dashing". A reference to having to maintain an image.

[touchingcloth]

I'd love to see a safety feature smash a baby's head like an egg's egg.

Wouldn't a better solution be to turn the baby seat around so that the baby can be saved by the bag rather than crushed by it? Better from the baby's point of view, of course; I'd personally find it hilarious to see its little slow motion face soaring towards a chair.

[pigamus]

The lyric is "those clumsy boots become a ruse that people think so dashing". A reference to having to maintain an image.

Not according to Google. And Google knows almost as much as Buzby does.

[thecuriousorange]

Many of the people I've been attracted to in my life remind me of my mother.