0bvious things you’ve only just realised (2019 edition)

[St_Eddie]

At that point we could all just pirate them too though.

Yes, but... look, just let me justify not paying for stuff and pirating shit, okay?!

[Spudgun]

I love it when a DVD claims 'scene selection' as a special feature.

Even better is when they proudly proclaim there to be "Two hours of special features" or something - and 1:59 of that is the length of the director's commentary.

[St_Eddie]

Even better is when they proudly proclaim there to be "Two hours of special features" or something - and 1:59 of that is the length of the director's commentary.

Still better than a 'making of', which is usually a 12 minute, 57 second video consisting of...

50% interviews with the cast, filmed for publicity purposes on set, talking about how amazing the film is and how everyone involved is so talented and how rainbows shoot out of the director's butthole and 50% clips from the film which you've just watched.

This is usually accompanied by a separate special feature listed as 'cast & crew interviews', which consists of...

80% the exact same publicity interviews from the 'making of' and 20% new material, which features the cast describing the plot of the film which you've just watched.

[JesusAndYourBush]

It's annoying when a DVD contains a whole load of little videos for the special features, for example each one is maybe around 7 to 10 minutes long and there's about 12 of them, but after watching each one you're dumped back to the menu so you have to select the next one - but there's no option to just play the bloody lot one after the other.

[St_Eddie]

I neglected to mention that my DVD of Blood Simple genuinely lists one of the special features as 'full screen'.  Not only is that not a special feature but it implies that the film is an inferior pan & scan version.

SPECIAL FEATURES: Trailer, Scene Selection, Less of the Intended Picture on Your Telly.

Blood Simple: The Philistine Edition.

No irritating black bars at the top and bottom of your screen, guaranteed.

[greenman]

On the "Not very obvious things you've realised" side after watching The Favourite, Rachel Weisz is 4 years older than Olivia Coleman.

[Icehaven]

Just how much of the awful Stock Aitken and Waterman stuff from the 80s was covers of 60s and 70s (often Northern Soul) songs. I mean I knew a lot of them were but every now and then some song will come on the radio and I'll think "Kylie did that back in...oh, there's another one." No wonder they were so maligned.

[Avril Lavigne]

I neglected to mention that my DVD of Blood Simple genuinely lists one of the special features as 'full screen'.  Not only is that not a special feature but it implies that the film is an inferior pan & scan version.

SPECIAL FEATURES: Trailer, Scene Selection, Less of the Intended Picture on Your Telly.

Blood Simple: The Philistine Edition.

No irritating black bars at the top and bottom of your screen, guaranteed.

With Widescreen movies My Dad just uses the 'Zoom' function on the remote until no black bars are visible and he's watching an even more tightly-cropped version than a Pan & Scan.  I've given up trying to explain to him.

[Icehaven]

In the Eminem song 'Stan', the name is an amalgam of Stalker/Fan and it's a common term. Dunno if he actually coined it or just used it though.

[Cuellar]

The term 'stan' came from the song didn't it? Or is that the joke?

[Icehaven]

The term 'stan' came from the song didn't it? Or is that the joke?

No I wasn't joking, I'm not sure if Eminem was the first to use it or not, but given it's not just a random name he picked for a song about an obsessive fan but a portmanteau of 'stalker' and 'fan' I don't know if it was already a term and he made a song about it, or he actually coined it.

[Cuellar]

Ah right - probably owes no little amount to the fact that it rhymes with 'fan', but I think the term came about because of Eminem.

'Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
Just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Bert'

[studpuppet]

Ah right - probably owes no little amount to the fact that it rhymes with 'fan', but I think the term came about because of Eminem.

'Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
Just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Bert'

Alan works just as well.

[Replies From View]

It's annoying when a DVD contains a whole load of little videos for the special features, for example each one is maybe around 7 to 10 minutes long and there's about 12 of them, but after watching each one you're dumped back to the menu so you have to select the next one - but there's no option to just play the bloody lot one after the other.

Especially when that content is just promotional stuff that was on youtube in the lead up to the film's release.

[Replies From View]

With Widescreen movies My Dad just uses the 'Zoom' function on the remote until no black bars are visible and he's watching an even more tightly-cropped version than a Pan & Scan.  I've given up trying to explain to him.

Bravo to your dad for sticking with a 4:3 telly after all these years.  Doesn't he ever sense that all TV these days has an alarming amount of stuff going on that he can't see?

[St_Eddie]

With Widescreen movies My Dad just uses the 'Zoom' function on the remote until no black bars are visible and he's watching an even more tightly-cropped version than a Pan & Scan.  I've given up trying to explain to him.

Hit him over the head with a baguette.  That'll learn him.

If it doesn't, then keep hitting him over the head with a succession of baguettes, each one slightly more stale than the last.  Eventually he'll get the picture, both metaphorically and literally.

It should be noted that by using this technique, your Dad may develop a paralysing fear of baguettes but necessary progress demands its costs (and a lot of baguettes).

[Replies From View]

Gove, as in Michael Gove, uses the first four letters of the word Government, which may explain why he is allowed to be in one.

[Twed]

Quink is a real type of ink, and not just something made up for Catterick. I buy bottled ink it's ridiculous that I didn't know this.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Just how much of the awful Stock Aitken and Waterman stuff from the 80s was covers of 60s and 70s (often Northern Soul) songs. I mean I knew a lot of them were but every now and then some song will come on the radio and I'll think "Kylie did that back in...oh, there's another one." No wonder they were so maligned.

He also copied their 'production line' style of working, but replaced most of the session musicians with synths and drum machines and that.

[studpuppet]

Quink is a real type of ink, and not just something made up for Catterick. I buy bottled ink it's ridiculous that I didn't know this.

It also has a long history (although I've never heard about the Filipino inventor story until literally just now).

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quink

[lazyhour]

A Nintendo game titles one:

"Paper Mario" is (presumably deliberately) very close to "Super Mario".

Even more obvious in Japanese:
スーパーマリオ
ペーパーマリオ

[St_Eddie]

Quink is a real type of ink, and not just something made up for Catterick. I buy bottled ink it's ridiculous that I didn't know this.

Still, useful when you're stuck in a mansion and surrounded by zombies.

[Avril Lavigne]

Bravo to your dad for sticking with a 4:3 telly after all these years.  Doesn't he ever sense that all TV these days has an alarming amount of stuff going on that he can't see?

Oh he does have a 16:9 TV but lot of movies are 21:9 so they still have the black bar situation going on.

Hit him over the head with a baguette.  That'll learn him.

If it doesn't, then keep hitting him over the head with a succession of baguettes, each one slightly more stale than the last.  Eventually he'll get the picture, both metaphorically and literally.

It should be noted that by using this technique, your Dad may develop a paralysing fear of baguettes but necessary progress demands its costs (and a lot of baguettes).

Ah, The French Method! I'll try that if my initial plan of taping black bars to his reading glasses should yield no results.

[Replies From View]

Oh he does have a 16:9 TV but lot of movies are 21:9 so they still have the black bar situation going on.

Fuck are they 21:9 for.  Just have them as 16:9.



I'm with your dad on this to be honest.  If they're going to keep thinning films down to the point where you're squinting at a 30cm ruler in the distance then of course you have to zoom in.

Also dads have worse eyesight than their children; it says so.  We don't understand what it is like to be them with their eyes.

[St_Eddie]

I'm with your dad on this to be honest.  If they're going to keep thinning films down to the point where you're squinting at a 30cm ruler in the distance then of course you have to zoom in.

Also dads have worse eyesight than their children; it says so.  We don't understand what it is like to be them with their eyes.

What is this nonsense?  I mean really!  Even Mr. Magoo's pet mole knows to watch a film in its correct aspect ratio.

[Avril Lavigne]

I'm with your dad on this to be honest.  If they're going to keep thinning films down to the point where you're squinting at a 30cm ruler in the distance then of course you have to zoom in.

I must admit it's something that gets on my nerves whenever I'm looking at potential new Blu Ray purchases & I find out that one of the few movies I actually want a high-quality copy of won't even fill my screen. As if it's not offputting enough already that hardly any Blu Rays even have Extra Features beyond a trailer that you could just watch on Youtube.

[pigamus]

Kraftwerk aren't actually having fun, fun, fun on the autobahn.

[phantom_power]

No, they sound quite miserable

[Pranet]

the simplemachines logo isn't actually a helicopter.

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

That's one fucked helicopter if it was one. If my understanding of aerodynamics is correct, it would constantly veer to the side, therefore contravening multiple air safety laws.