0bvious things you’ve only just realised (2019 edition)

[Cerys]

Riddle me this then...

Continental Quilt

A covering that makes you less likely to shit the bed.

Shoe Horn

Used to be carved from sections of cow horn

David Guest

?

May show up unexpectedly to colonise spare rooms everywhere, more so now that he's dead.

[kalowski]

I'm going to blow your mind with:

Fireplace
Motorway
Waterfall

When you go to sleep you stop having non specific positions. You place.
And then in the morning you fire that place.
You literally fire place...

When you go to sleep you stop aimlessly wandering. You way.
And then in the morning you motor that way.
You literally motor way...

When you go to sleep you stop climbing. You fall.
And then in the morning you water that fall.
You literally water fall...


Mind not blown.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Maybe it's not a universal term in the States, but one that's quirky enough for multiple comedy writers to have been drawn to as a shorthand way to signpost that someone is a little offbeat, a little bit other. I can't really think of a British equivalent, except perhaps a grown adult using the words mummy and daddy, or "gramps".

I used to call one of my grandfather's "Grandpops", which is pretty rubbish, but hey, it was his idea apparently.

[touchingcloth]

Only one pair of my grandparents was alive when I was born, and I called them grandma and grandad. It was quite some time later when I realised that some people use granny/grandad for one set of grandparents and nanny/gramps or something equally lame for the other set. I used to think people were picking twee names rather than having names which usefully distinguished between four different close to death people.

[Better Midlands]

I used to call one of my grandfather's "Grandpops", which is pretty rubbish, but hey, it was his idea apparently.

My children and nephews call my father "Grandpops", also his idea.

[Replies From View]

1) Grandma
2) Grandpa
3) Gravema
4) Gravepa


(Depending on which ones seem oldest.)

[Sebastian Cobb]

Only one pair of my grandparents was alive when I was born, and I called them grandma and grandad. It was quite some time later when I realised that some people use granny/grandad for one set of grandparents and nanny/gramps or something equally lame for the other set. I used to think people were picking twee names rather than having names which usefully distinguished between four different close to death people.

I've had some people say 'my granny' forcefully as if it should specify something more than a parents parent, and I've wondered if there's some hidden code I never got - nan's your mum's set and gran's the other.

[touchingcloth]

I've had some people say 'my granny' forcefully as if it should specify something more than a parents parent, and I've wondered if there's some hidden code I never got - nan's your mum's set and gran's the other.

Yeah I've never worked out if there are universal rules or if each family just does its own thing. But then we're not all lucky enough to have living relatives :(

[NoSleep]

I've had some people say 'my granny' forcefully as if it should specify something more than a parents parent, and I've wondered if there's some hidden code I never got - nan's your mum's set and gran's the other.

Isn't that because saying just "granny" makes it a name as opposed to specifying a particular person? People say "my mum" or "my dad" in conversation to others, too, in much the same way as specifying "my brother" or "my aunt", etc.

[Ferris]

I've had some people say 'my granny' forcefully as if it should specify something more than a parents parent, and I've wondered if there's some hidden code I never got - nan's your mum's set and gran's the other.

I'm part of the "Nan's your mums set, grans your dads set" set. We let our parents pick their own derivative old person name when my son was born and they've gone the same way, which leads me to think it is some sort of rule.

[Replies From View]

Isn't that because saying just "granny" makes it a name as opposed to specifying a particular person? People say "my mum" or "my dad" in conversation to others, too, in much the same way as specifying "my brother" or "my aunt", etc.

Ah, yes.  Determiners, they're called.  We used to use them for indicating specific instances of a thing; not sure whether people still do that but back in those days it was bloody awesome if truth be told.

[Shit Good Nose]

I'm part of the "Nan's your mums set, grans your dads set" set. We let our parents pick their own derivative old person name when my son was born and they've gone the same way, which leads me to think it is some sort of rule.

It was always nanny and grampy (sometimes gramps) for me and my sister.  My mum's parents.  We never knew our dad's parents - all very mysterious that.  One of them died quite young years before we were born, and the other died a few years before I was born, and my sister never knew them.  All we have of their existence are, literally, a few black and white photos, and the knowledge that they were strict C of E and were never happy that my dad was stepping out with my mum (apparently because she was Miss Hula-Hoop Newport for a few years running in the late 50s/early 60s).

There's a Who the Fuck Do You Think You Are? in there somewhere, but I can't be arsed.

[touchingcloth]

A .44 Magnum is a bullet, not a gun.

[phantom_power]

A .44 Magnum is a bullet, not a gun.

Huh? Is it not "the most powerful handgun in the world"?

[Icehaven]

Instead of paying £5-10 a month for pet insurance or device insurance it's better to just put the same money away somewhere, then (unless you and/or your pet are particularly unlucky) by the time you need it you'll have enough to cover it or at least a fair amount towards it, and without any quibbling and delays from an insurer.

[a duncandisorderly]

I'm part of the "Nan's your mums set, grans your dads set" set. We let our parents pick their own derivative old person name when my son was born and they've gone the same way, which leads me to think it is some sort of rule.

bilingual kids, born in spain, one set of olds there & one here in the UK. that's one way of sorting out this mess- use different languages.

& by the way, fuck brexit.

[Bennett Brauer]

Grandmothers are called Grammy in Manchester. I saw that on a sitcom too.

[touchingcloth]

Instead of paying £5-10 a month for pet insurance or device insurance it's better to just put the same money away somewhere, then (unless you and/or your pet are particularly unlucky) by the time you need it you'll have enough to cover it or at least a fair amount towards it, and without any quibbling and delays from an insurer.

Yep, pet insurance is a total scam, and serves the function of pushing costs up for the rest of us for some treatments.

We did some quick calculations for the animals, and the only situations where insurance would be cost effective would be for major be breaks, as most smaller things the treatment costs would be less than the excess.

There are properly nasty things like cancer as well, but unless you pay massive premiums the treatment costs are capped at an amount which probably wouldn't touch the sides of the bills. If our animals get properly sick it'll be goodnight time.

[a duncandisorderly]

Grandmothers are called Grammy in Manchester. I saw that on a sitcom too.

trying to imagine a scenario where wayne rooney is invited to the grammy awards & gets all excited about it before it is explained to him that it's music oscars & not grey pubes.

[Ferris]

Huh? Is it not "the most powerful handgun in the world"?

.44 magnum is a calibre. It has a rimmed cartridge so is designed primarily for revolvers (you'd need it to be rimless to fit the majority of semi-auto pistol or rifle magazines though presumably someone somewhere has manufactured such a thing. Would probably work in an under-barrel tube mag similar to the Winchester .44-40 but I haven't bothered to look it up as rimmed cartridges aren't for me).

It is used as a de facto reference to any revolver in .44 mag, so OP is half right - it is a calibre but is also used to refer to a specific type of firearm (ie a double action revolver in .44 mag). The S&W model 29 is the famous one, but I think Colt make python models in both .357 and .44 mag.

As for being the most powerful - it depends how you measure these things, but .50AE is a more powerful commonly-available calibre for pistols. You can also get more specialized cartridges that have more muzzle energy than .44 mag (I'm thinker of yer .454 Casulls and wildcat overproof cartridges) or even .410 shotgun slugs in certain pistols for the lunatic who wants to do that sort of thing. I think Remington make such a revolver. .44 mag could well have been the most powerful commonly available pistol calibre at the time of the film (I think .50AE was a '70s invention) but can't be arsed to look it up.

So yes and no, basically.

[touchingcloth]

Which one kills cunts deadest?

[Ferris]

Which one kills cunts deadest?

Well, you're really asking 3 different questions there. You see...

[5 paragraphs no one will read]

...and that (in my opinion) is the best way to reverse sear a tri-tip steak. Now as for your sirloin...

Etc etc

[a duncandisorderly]

[5 paragraphs no one will read]

so the full-metal-jacket actually makes them make less of a mess of people, but they go further & more accurately? huh. who'da thunk it?

[touchingcloth]

reverse sear

This is a great shibboleth for cunts. I would like to, as the gun nuts say, put some slug pellets out for these people.

[imitationleather]

Yep, pet insurance is a total scam, and serves the function of pushing costs up for the rest of us for some treatments.

We did some quick calculations for the animals, and the only situations where insurance would be cost effective would be for major be breaks, as most smaller things the treatment costs would be less than the excess.

There are properly nasty things like cancer as well, but unless you pay massive premiums the treatment costs are capped at an amount which probably wouldn't touch the sides of the bills. If our animals get properly sick it'll be goodnight time.

Making a cat go through cancer treatment seems more cruel than putting it to sleep.

[zomgmouse]

shibboleth for cunts

I love this!!!

[Ferris]

so the full-metal-jacket actually makes them make less of a mess of people, but they go further & more accurately? huh. who'da thunk it?

It (allegedly) makes the projectile less frangible and delivers more kinetic energy to the target, and is therefore more humane for use in combat. So says the UN, anyway. Accuracy is better determined by the rifling, firearm and grade of ammo rather than the projectile, but they definitely have a longer effective range.

I'm not mad or anything.

This is a great shibboleth for cunts. I would like to, as the gun nuts say, put some slug pellets out for these people.

You were this close to getting an invite to the next Ferris Family BBQ Bonanza^TM!

Unfortunately, that offer is now rescinded.

[Replies From View]

Grandmothers are called Grammy in Manchester. I saw that on a sitcom too.

They are called Gummy in Bath.

[buzby]

.44 magnum is a calibre. It has a rimmed cartridge so is designed primarily for revolvers (you'd need it to be rimless to fit the majority of semi-auto pistol or rifle magazines though presumably someone somewhere has manufactured such a thing. Would probably work in an under-barrel tube mag similar to the Winchester .44-40 but I haven't bothered to look it up as rimmed cartridges aren't for me).

Technically .44 Magnum is a cartridge standard. The .44 refers to to the barrel/bullet diameter or 'calibre' (though for .44  the bullets are actually 0.429"), the Magnum is the cartridge case size, in this case a lengthened version of the case from the original .44 Special cartridge standard that allowed a larger, more powerful powder load to be used.

Most cartridge standards have had 'Magnum' versions developed for them for the 'bigger is better' crowd - .454 Casuli was a 'Magnum' derived from the original .45 Long Colt revolver ammunition, and Smith & Wesson's ,460 Magnum uses the same bullet calibre with a further lengthened cartridge case (so basically a 'double Magnum').

I expect you know all this though - not trying to be picky or arsey, I hope you understand.

Regarding .44 in rimless for use in automatic pistol magazines, the AutoMag was developed around the .44 AMP cartridge standard, which used .44 bullets with rimless 'Magnum'-length cartridge cases, manufactured by shortening .308 Winchester rifle cases to the same length as a .44 Magnum case:


Dirty Harry actually uses an .44 AutoMag in Sudden Impact

So yes and no, basically.

Agreed..

[Shit Good Nose]

Yep, pet insurance is a total scam

There is a flip-side...

Our cat was hit by a car in about 2003 and the vets bill for that was getting on for £5000 (yes - five grand).  All bar our £50 excess was covered by the insurance.  If we didn't have the insurance, there was absolutely no way we'd have been able to afford that - I'm not even sure we'd have been able to take out a loan as I already had two on the go, and Mrs Nose was working very part time - so she (the cat) would've been put down.  Worth it?  Ask her - she's just had her 17th birthday and has many years left in her yet.

A few years later, the insurance also covered sorting out her feline gingivitis, which would have otherwise been another £1800.


It's like boiler cover - you think it's pointless until something goes wrong and you face a £900 repair bill.