Carnivore snowflakes triggered by vegan sausage roll

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Are there things like pop-quorn and quorn-flakes and so on?  Why can't you just eat normal corn?

[Dex Sawash]

#meatoo

[alan nagsworth]

Why can't you just eat normal corn?

Because then I'd have to go out and harvest it and all that shit. I would have a horrible time and that counts as mistreatment of animals (me).

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Because then I'd have to go out and harvest it and all that shit. I would have a horrible time and that counts as mistreatment of animals (me).

One animal, that is.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

You're forgetting all the animals he would take his frustration out on.

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You're forgetting all the animals he would take his frustration out on.

Which ones?

[alan nagsworth]

Mate I'd boot the head off a goose if I was forced to harvest my own corn

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Mate I'd boot the head off a goose if I was forced to harvest my own corn

Would you hold the body of the goose in place before you did it?  Bit worried you'll just end up booting the whole goose.

[alan nagsworth]

Yeah believe me, there's nowt harder than trying to boot a goose's body off. You have a much higher rate of success going for the head. Imagine it like a big honking dandelion.

You're right, though: geese can get a right speed on them when they want to, especially if they twig on to the fact you're trying to boot their heads off. I recommend an industrial vice, or if you can't get your hands on one of those, wedge it between a couple of sofas.

[Sebastian Cobb]

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A dandelion's head doesn't have a thumping great body underneath does it?  It has a stalk.  The success of booting a dandelion's head off comes from the fact that the head is the greatest wodge of mass that it has, and even then you are chiming dimes if you think the stalk isn't being booted off with the head for more than 80% of your goes.

You might say well the neck of a goose is a bit like a stalk, and it is, but only if you can transform the body beneath into some kind of ground and rooting system.  An industrial vice or couple of sofas aid with the physics of booting a goose's head off but do they return anything to the soil?  I'm not sure they do.

[Sebastian Cobb]

[Thursday]

This isn't actually real is it? The guy has a sign about the EU. Seems to be an unrelated thing and they just happen to be outside greggs, and that facebook thing is a parody.

[alan nagsworth]

An industrial vice or couple of sofas aid with the physics of booting a goose's head off but do they return anything to the soil?  I'm not sure they do.

What are you on about? Of course it does. I use the goose's headless body as an authentic goose down pillow for one of said sofas.

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What are you on about? Of course it does. I use the goose's headless body as an authentic goose down pillow for one of said sofas.

Alright, serious question now:  has there ever been an entire sofa made merely by inflating a headless goose using a mini air compressor?

[Great Satan]

This isn't actually real is it? The guy has a sign about the EU. Seems to be an unrelated thing and they just happen to be outside greggs, and that facebook thing is a parody.

I know one of the guys in the photos, so I'm afraid it bloody well is.

I thought he was getting his shit together but apparently not.

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I assumed it was about the little yellow sign there forbidding the sale of tobacco to kids.

[Thursday]

I know one the guys in the photos, so I'm afraid it bloody well is.

I thought he was getting his shit together but apparently not.

https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/were-yellow-vests-protesting-against-15634441

[Johnny Yesno]

This isn't actually real is it? The guy has a sign about the EU. Seems to be an unrelated thing and they just happen to be outside greggs, and that facebook thing is a parody.

I thought that too, but some doubt is creeping in. Poe's law, and that.

Edit: Ah, right, thanks Thursday. One of those question headlines where the answer is 'No'.

[Great Satan]

https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/were-yellow-vests-protesting-against-15634441

Sorry. I haven't been on the ball today.

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Sorry. I haven't been on the ball today.

Did your friend/acquaintance tell you he was campaigning against the quorn sausage roll?  Why?

[Great Satan]

Did your friend/acquaintance tell you he was campaigning against the quorn sausage roll?  Why?

He didn't tell me, and he doesn't know that I know he's there. I zoomed in on the picture and spotted him. I'd have to text him but I'm not sure that I want to know anymore.

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He didn't tell me, and he doesn't know that I know he's there. I zoomed in on the picture and spotted him. I'd have to text him but I'm not sure that I want to know anymore.

You should phone him as if in a panic, asking what on earth he has been doing to get his face all over the breaking news channels in pore-searing close-up.

[alan nagsworth]

I dunno if you lot are just thick or what, but those "protesters in yellow vests" appear to be police officers.

[Great Satan]

You should phone him as if in a panic, asking what on earth he has been doing to get his face all over the breaking news channels in pore-searing close-up.

Yes, I was going to text him to that effect (sans panicking), but, really, it's his own bloody fault if this all comes home to roost. Someone at his place of work will almost certainly see him and report him.

[Buelligan]

Better to have them inside the tent, pissing out.

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I dunno if you lot are just thick or what, but those "protesters in yellow vests" appear to be police officers.

I see what you mean but those aren't actually vests.  Vests are undergarments and it's only when the protesters were forced to strip that the colour of their vests (and indeed their underpants, socks and - yes - their genitals) became a matter of public record.

[Captain Z]

I dunno if you lot are just thick or what, but those "protesters in yellow vests" appear to be police officers.

I don't know if you're doing a joke but there is a line of yellow jacketed police in front of a line of yellow vested protesters. The sleeves tell you the difference. And they are protesting against the EU, not Greggs.

[Sony Walkman Prophecies]

As a vegetarian of 20 years, the only real prejudice I come up against is my Mum every Christmas going "Why don't you have some turkey? You used to like turkey!" "Why don't you have some fish. You used to like fish!" Despite the fact that the last time I enjoyed these things was at the same point in my life when I thought Prodigy Firestarter was the best record ever made, and that all politician should take ecstasy to see we're all basically the same. Irritating then, but nothing to create a huge stink over. I even had one meat-eater this year (uncle) say he empathised with the vegetarian position, but just couldn't see himself giving it up. So things are slowly improving in the SWP household, even if not in the world.

[alan nagsworth]

I don't know if you're doing a joke but there is a line of yellow jacketed police in front of a line of yellow vested protesters. The sleeves tell you the difference. And they are protesting against the EU, not Greggs.

Why would I do a joke about these brave people upholding civil justice? Undermining the system is the sort of thing that lands you in jail. You might want to think about that. It's basically all I think about, as well a load of other stuff, because I'm not thick.