Backed up

[Pingers]

Despite having eaten plenty of fruit, drink plenty of water and juice and had something involving haricot beans for lunch, I am badly backed up. Train stuck in the tunnel on the Bakeapoo Line. I got about 90% dilated just then but couldn't make the final push. I'm scared, readers. This is not going to be good when it finally crests. Please send an epidural or at least gas and air. Cheers.

[Cuellar]

Send another shit down there to get it out. Yes, eat a shit. Chase it out.

[Pingers]

How about a shit disguised as a sausage, so cunningly that it is to all intents and purposes a sausage?

Or a ferret? They're good at chasing things out of holes aren't they?

[Alberon]

Send another shit down there to get it out. Yes, eat a shit. Chase it out.

But what if the two collide and you end up with a derailment?

[Pingers]

[tag] Wipes, flushes, leaves bathroom in ashen silence, goes to lie down [/tag]