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March 29, 2024, 03:55:02 PM

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Snooker 2019

Started by dr beat, January 12, 2019, 03:17:07 PM

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Flouncer

Alexander Ursenbacher has won the first frame against Higgins. I'm praying that he can use some Swiss precision to get this hulking chunk of gammon off our screens.

#TurdFlush

Blue Jam

What a bell:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/amp/snooker/50738237

Maybe he'll finally make good on one of his numerous "threats" to retire.

Blue Jam

I hope Ronnie totally loses his nerve at the sight of Cahill swaggering into the arena tonight.

Blue Jam

Oh fuck, Ronnie can actually be arsed tonight.

Blue Jam


Blue Jam

Did no-one else see Ronnie's Roaring Rampage of Revenge then? Not the result I wanted but it was at least more entertaining than Ricky Gervais's After Life, and over in about a sixth of the time.

Bizarre to see Ronnie whining about having to play low-ranked players, then pulling out of the UK Masters (where he wouldn't have had to play any) and putting more effort into a match against the world No. 118 than he has in any other match this year.

What was all that stuff about the ref going in for a handshake and Ronnie telling him "sorry- germs" before doing a fist-bump instead? Fucking oddball.

Blue Jam

Where the fuck is everyone? Anyone would think there was an election on or something.

(I hope Ronnie did a postal vote. I hope Ali Carter forgot)

I'm watching. Don't mean to be crude but this ref is giving me the RFH.

And also ASMR!

Very composed and authoritative. No messing. Calm but you do not fuck with.

What's the accent? Scottish? Sounds almost French.

Ronald Wanker is playing pretty nice so far. Pez Dispenser looks like he's emitting a pellet. Also both old cunts. Looks like a veterans game.

Blue Jam

I have seen some Twitter twats saying her voice is too high and shrill. Fuck 'em:

https://www.worldsnooker.com/maike-enjoying-life-on-tour/

G'waaaarn The Gentleman, keep distracting me from the election and please tell me you're not Brexit AF.

Total scumbags. German, then. I have a tremendous amount of respect both for the German people and for the way Maike goes about her professional duties. Excellent reffing. Excellent ASMR. Now that I'm not being an objectifying bastard, I will also say that she deserves more respect than the RFH which was my initial response. Apologies, Frau Maike, if you're reading this.

Blue Jam

Snooker needs all the totty it can get, frankly.

On that subject, it looks like Dr Beat and I will be seeing the increasingly Shaun Ryderesque Mark Allen tomorrow when we head to the Emirates Arena, and he'll be playing either Un-Nooh or Lebowski. It's nice that I'll definitely know who to root for.

Blue Jam

I did laugh seeing this ad pop up on Eurosport today:

https://youtu.be/VUObusl2JyM

Think I may have made a mistake in my earlier post- we may now be seeing Mark Selbah vs Trump or Gilbert tomorrow. I'll keep you all posted and let you know what we're wearing *mouth breathing* so you can all look out for us if you give a fuck.

Blue Jam

Right- Dr Beat and I are off to Glesga for the semis now, we'll be at the afternoon session, which I think is The Sex Pester From Leicester vs Gilbert's Fridge. I'll be wearing a purpley-blue jumper and black-framed glasses but I think we're quite near the back this time

Flouncer

Hope it's a good match for you Blue Jam. x

Blue Jam

Cheers Flouncer!

Meanwhile, I am shocked to learn that "The Jester" actually has a sense of humour:

https://youtu.be/-E4wT153_RQ

Alright Selbot, I'll admit I laughed.

Blue Jam

I'll post a proper review later, but first- DESOLATION:





It was absolutely brilliant. I am totally going again next year.

dr beat

Desolation? Try some Rugby League venues like Widnes back pre-97 ;)

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: Blue Jam on December 14, 2019, 11:58:09 AM
Cheers Flouncer!

Meanwhile, I am shocked to learn that "The Jester" actually has a sense of humour:

https://youtu.be/-E4wT153_RQ

Alright Selbot, I'll admit I laughed.

O'Sullivan recoiling at having his hand touch.

Classic Trump esque power projection from Molester.