Snooker 2019

[Flouncer]

Anybody watching the Grand Prix? Mark Allen just conceded a match for no apparent reason. He was 3-1 down in a first to four against Alic Carter, and he just jacked it in half way through a frame. I haven't seen this happen since Ronnie walked out of that match against Hendry years ago. Really weird. He's going to get fined for that.

[BlodwynPig]

Another BBC article on mental health and snooker in 3...2...

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

What's the point of the audience watching me miss more and more?

Yep knew it wouldn't take long before some babyish shitty little myopic wanker whining returned.

What's the point of the audience paying to watch a full snooker game? Hmm.. pretty self-explanatory you fucking pork pie in human form.

Describing the playing conditions of the match table as "disgusting", Allen added: "It's out of character but it's just the way I felt today.

Disgusting, as I wasn't winning.

[MidnightShambler]

Mark Allen is one dislikeable cunt, I don't take great pleasure in anybody's downfall but I must admit, it's not a hardship to watch him get beat. He's the type of player and personality that grates on me. He's grown up winning everything at junior level locally and has thought ever since that nobody in the world has his ability, he's the best player out there and he only loses because he doesn't play well, never because of a superior opponent. He's got ideas beyond his ability unfortunately. Judd Trump was the same but that appears to be changing now. It won't for Allen because he's such an obnoxious, hardfaced, entitled bastard.

I also suspect him of holding some pretty extreme views as well. He looks the type.

[Flouncer]

In fairness to him, other players had complained that the table in question was playing badly - they ended up re-covering it a day earlier than was scheduled. Walking off in the middle of the match was a shitty thing to do though; disrespectful both to the spectators and his opponent.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Yeah just handled atrociously by someone experienced enough to know better but ultimately a big crybaby who can't even deal with actually being beaten fair and square.

[Blue Jam]

Watching Carter vs Allen now. GOB II seems to have aged about 20 years since the 2018 World Championship. Understandable but still, poor guy.

[Blue Jam]

Disgusting, as I wasn't winning.

Table looks a bit bouncy but Carter totally outclassed Allen here.

Allen could have a massive bear following if only he had an iota of charm and appeal.

[MidnightShambler]

What a petulant twat. He's playing in a pro event, earning thousands of pounds in a short frame match in an iconic (in snooker terms) venue, not playing in the £100 plate competition at his regional finals at a social club, the arrogant bastard. Far, far better players than him have struggled and not quit, imagine Hendry or Davis doing that (I'll give Ronnie the benefit of the doubt because he was a genuine basket case at the time).
I'm not one that would usually suggest a ban for anyone for anything other than cheating or match fixing but I really would give him a six month holiday. He's got a list of misdemeanours as long as your arm, he's a fucking disgrace. He needs the shock treatment.

[BlodwynPig]

Next time i'd like to see him hurl the white ball across the table with such force as it flies off and hurts someone and THEN storm off. Now that's classic snooker rage quitting

[Blue Jam]

A bit of top bantz from Mrs Mark Allen:

https://mobile.twitter.com/kylamcguigan/status/1093574058510336000

...though the word she chose to call her husband seems an appropriate one, given this, which is what she appears to be referring to:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BtltyDfAa32/

Is he the Ricky Gervais of snooker?

[BlodwynPig]

A bit of top bantz from Mrs Mark Allen:

https://mobile.twitter.com/kylamcguigan/status/1093574058510336000

...though the word she chose to call her husband seems an appropriate one, given this:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BtltyDfAa32/

Is he the Ricky Gervais of snooker?

Can you translate all that?

[Blue Jam]

Can you translate all that?

It looks like a fan Tweeted at Mark Allen to say his rage-quitting was no laughing matter when he had put a bet on him to win, Allen "sarcastically" offered to reimburse him, then when the guy sent him a DM with a photo of his betting slip and his bank details he posted the pic on Instagram and was all "HAHAHAHAHA CHECK OUT THIS DUNCE" about it. His missus also seems to find it pretty funny, as do his fawning fans.

Yep, hilarious ripping off paying fans- and, as others have pointed out, you and your missus sneering at gamblers while you happily wear the logos of all the bookies who sponsor the tournaments you play in.

[BlodwynPig]

It looks like a fan Tweeted at Mark Allen to say his rage-quitting was no laughing matter when he had put a bet on him to win, Allen "sarcastically" offered to reimburse him, then when the guy sent him a DM with a photo of his betting slip and his bank details he posted the pic on Instagram and was all "HAHAHAHAHA CHECK OUT THIS DUNCE" about it. His missus also seems to find it pretty funny, as do his fawning fans.

Yep, hilarious ripping off paying fans- and, as others have pointed out, you and your missus sneering at gamblers while you happily wear the logos of all the bookies who sponsor the tournaments you play in.

I sneer at doofus gamblers all the time. He's a fuckwit for thinking that Allen would pay that. Allen should be censured for his action and all this social media back and forth is pointless entertainment.

[Blue Jam]

If it wasn't for doofus gamblers players like Mark Allen wouldn't be picking up such big prizes as the Dafabet Masters, Coral Grand Prix and Betfred World Championships. Yes, the guy was a bit daft but Allen and his wife encouraging his fans to dogpile on him and making light of gambling addiction has more than a whiff of Gervais.

[BlodwynPig]

If it wasn't for doofus gamblers players like Mark Allen wouldn't be picking up such big prizes as the Dafabet Masters, Coral Grand Prix and Betfred World Championship. Yes, the guy was a bit daft but Allen and his wife encouraging his fans to dogpile on him and making light of gambling addiction has more than a whiff of Gervais.

No winners in this game.

[bgmnts]

Not even I would stick money on Mark Allen.

But yeah aye comes across as a bit cunty.

[Lost Oliver]

Even this pisses me off.

Mark Allen
Professional snooker player from Antrim, Northern Ireland. Married with 2 beautiful girls Lauren and Harleigh and a little stepson Robbie.

Why distinguish between the children? Why not just say three children?

[ToneLa]

Even this pisses me off.

Mark Allen
Professional snooker player from Antrim, Northern Ireland. Married with 2 beautiful girls Lauren and Harleigh and a little stepson Robbie.

Why distinguish between the children? Why not just say three children?

They're special unique darlings and need, NEED to be cited individually!

His wife doesn't though

[petril]

Even this pisses me off.

Mark Allen
Professional snooker player from Antrim, Northern Ireland. Married with 2 beautiful girls Lauren and Harleigh and a little stepson Robbie.

Why distinguish between the children? Why not just say three children?

because Robbie's an ugly little cunt

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

I laughed

[Blue Jam]

Anyone watching the Welsh Open? Just watched Gammon Chin get knocked out by Joe O'Connor. Over in the pundits' box, Ronnie O'Sullivan is sporting a Hoxton fin but he's sitting next to Jimmy White whose hair (or whatever it is he's got up there) is infinitely more distracting. He's had an entire head transplant, I reckon.

[MidnightShambler]

Anyone watching the Welsh Open? Just watched Gammon Chin get knocked out by Joe O'Connor. Over in the pundits' box, Ronnie O'Sullivan is sporting a Hoxton fin but he's sitting next to Jimmy White whose hair (or whatever it is he's got up there) is infinitely more distracting. He's had an entire head transplant, I reckon.

Jimmy White's 'hair' is the one thing on this planet that's guaranteed to cheer me up. Whenever I see it, I get all giddy.

Plus it's attached to a complete cunt. He did an exhibition in a club close to me years ago, drank about thirty vodka and oranges and didn't speak to the crowd once, other than 'hello'. Then, when he was playing the 12yr old lad put forward for the experience/sympathy game, let him break off and cleared the fucking table, before leaving without saying goodbye. Twat.

[petril]

makes going back and watching him bottle all them finals entertaining

[MidnightShambler]

makes going back and watching him bottle all them finals entertaining

To be fair to the ladyboy shagger, he only bottled the one (missed black at 17-17), he was just outclassed in all the others. Hendry was a fucking machine and John Parrott was a great player having the season of his life. Mind you, he only got the chance to bottle one so I can console myself with imagining him bottling all the others if it'd got nervy.

[Morrison Lard]

Anyone watching the Welsh Open? Just watched Gammon Chin get knocked out by Joe O'Connor.

That was a really good watch.
Unlike this pile of dog eggs that's currently on.

[Flouncer]

Anyone watching the Welsh Open? Just watched Gammon Chin get knocked out by Joe O'Connor.

That was a solid win but it was a bit unsportsmanlike of him to repeatedly ask Higgins if he was a sardine throughout the match.

[Morrison Lard]

Quest have decided this match is as good as over and put an unscheduled episode of "How It's Made" on instead.

[Morrison Lard]

This looks like summat from Viz:

[Morrison Lard]

His "Whirlwind" range twitter page is fucking bonkers..