Author Topic: Simon Cowell's new face (Read 35940 times)

Jockice · « **Reply #720 on:** November 17, 2019, 01:28:46 PM »

Jeez. Just look at the state of these two in the main picture. Don't usually go for appearance-based insults but these two have brought it upon themselves.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/britains-first-gay-dads-split-20898892

Cursus · « **Reply #721 on:** December 21, 2019, 08:29:29 PM »

Johnny Yesno · « **Reply #722 on:** December 21, 2019, 08:38:38 PM »

Zaphod Beeblebrox has let himself go.

imitationleather · « **Reply #723 on:** December 21, 2019, 08:43:34 PM »

I just re-read this thread and became a bit concerned I might become one of those "Died while laughing" statistics.

Ooh, it's Saturday night and I'm having a fucking good laugh at an old man's face.

Sebastian Cobb · « **Reply #724 on:** December 21, 2019, 10:05:40 PM »

Quote from: Elderly Sumo Prophecy on November 14, 2019, 03:55:39 PM

I wonder if Cowell is aware of Limmy's righteous vendetta against his face. I wish they'd get involved in a Twitter war, it's all a bit one sided so far.

How do you counter people rinsing the obvious surgery you've had?

Other than self-immoliation you're fucked

Elderly Sumo Prophecy · « **Reply #725 on:** December 21, 2019, 10:35:04 PM »

I suppose he could acknowledge it and make light of it like Joan Rivers or something, but that would require a degree of self awareness and introspection that I don't think old Simo possesses.

idunnosomename · « **Reply #726 on:** December 21, 2019, 10:39:25 PM »

at least he can't look sad about it

because the rigidity of his new face does not allow it haha. he cannot frown, he cannot cry

Alberon · « **Reply #727 on:** December 21, 2019, 10:42:59 PM »

Quote from: Cursus on December 21, 2019, 08:29:29 PM

Actually his face is starting to look much better... no, wait that's a monkey's arse.

Glebe · « **Reply #728 on:** December 21, 2019, 11:32:37 PM »

Quote from: Cursus on December 21, 2019, 08:29:29 PM

Somebody from Madness have really let themselves go on beach with a monkey on their shoulder.

Cardenio I · « **Reply #729 on:** December 22, 2019, 12:31:55 AM »

Quote from: Cursus on December 21, 2019, 08:29:29 PM

I refuse to believe this is a real picture.

Bazooka · « **Reply #730 on:** December 22, 2019, 01:22:20 AM »

Quote from: Cardenio I on December 22, 2019, 12:31:55 AM

I refuse to believe this is a real picture.

Just because the man in the backgrounds hat is a little jaunty, doesn't mean it's not real.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy · « **Reply #731 on:** December 22, 2019, 01:28:14 AM »

I hope that monkey tried to fuck his ear.

Cardenio I · « **Reply #732 on:** December 22, 2019, 01:30:48 AM »

Pretty sure that ear is a trompe l'oeil.

Sebastian Cobb · « **Reply #733 on:** January 05, 2020, 01:26:35 PM »

Keep 'em peeled, he's doing a barclays advert. It's like one of those Adam and Joe things where they used to make dolls talk by composting their mouths over the top of the dolls mouth.

Cursus · « **Reply #734 on:** January 05, 2020, 01:30:44 PM »

Johnny Yesno · « **Reply #735 on:** January 05, 2020, 01:41:07 PM »

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on January 05, 2020, 01:26:35 PM

composting their mouths

Is this another term for making celebrities swear - potty mouths?

Elderly Sumo Prophecy · « **Reply #736 on:** January 05, 2020, 01:42:55 PM »

The Barclays advert is from last year isn't it? Anyway, happy new year, freak features.

Butchers Blind · « **Reply #737 on:** January 05, 2020, 02:04:19 PM »

Quote from: Cursus on January 05, 2020, 01:30:44 PM

Its like two faces stuck together. The bottom half is that of a middle aged man and the top half... fuck knows, silly putty stretched out with craft eyes stuck in?

seepage · « **Reply #738 on:** January 05, 2020, 02:37:20 PM »

Quote from: Elderly Sumo Prophecy on January 05, 2020, 01:42:55 PM

The Barclays advert is from last year isn't it? Anyway, happy new year, freak features.

yes, there's a spoof up-thread:

Quote from: Al Tha Funkee Homosapien on May 01, 2019, 10:33:12 PM

Simon checks his CaB account for the first time in ages...

Pinball · « **Reply #739 on:** January 06, 2020, 09:25:12 PM »

He can't take it with him when he dies. Or his wealth. Because his face is cut off, you see? You see? Like Simon can't from his droopy scrotum eyes.

Pinball · « **Reply #740 on:** January 06, 2020, 09:32:06 PM »

Winning!

Twit 2 · « **Reply #741 on:** January 06, 2020, 10:16:17 PM »

Less a set of teeth, more a rorqual’s baleen plate. He looks like a hostage forced into lying about their living conditions.

idunnosomename · « **Reply #742 on:** January 06, 2020, 10:22:55 PM »

Quote from: Pinball on January 06, 2020, 09:25:12 PM

He can't take it with him when he dies. Or his wealth. Because his face is cut off, you see? You see? Like Simon can't from his droopy scrotum eyes.

he wont die

imitationleather · « **Reply #743 on:** January 06, 2020, 10:55:42 PM »

Indeed. He will never die when we still have his music.

idunnosomename · « **Reply #744 on:** January 06, 2020, 11:39:40 PM »

yes, all the great acts we treasure. like.

...

hahaha look at the cunts face it's like underneath a cuttlefish

Kryton · « **Reply #745 on:** January 06, 2020, 11:51:04 PM »

Seen my new face?
Mate.

Blumf · « **Reply #746 on:** January 06, 2020, 11:59:10 PM »

Quote from: imitationleather on January 06, 2020, 10:55:42 PM

Indeed. He will never die when we still have his music.

Sad fart sound

Pinball · « **Reply #747 on:** January 07, 2020, 12:53:23 AM »

He is a cover version of a human being. Like his over-hyped 'acts'. But no new songs whatsoever (to my knowledge).

Sebastian Cobb · « **Reply #748 on:** January 07, 2020, 01:52:21 PM »

Quote from: Pinball on January 07, 2020, 12:53:23 AM

He is a cover version of a human being. Like his over-hyped 'acts'. But no new songs whatsoever (to my knowledge).

His face has been aggressively autotuned.

Default to the negative · « **Reply #749 on:** January 07, 2020, 02:28:48 PM »

With Simon Cowell's money, he must be able to afford the best plastic surgeons available. So it's not an amateur botched job. This new face must be something he specifically asked for. Because he thinks it looks good? He'll never get that CBE now.

Quote

Simon Cowell was reportedly left gutted after he was snubbed from the New Year's Honours list.

The X Factor judge, 60, was told last month that he'd been snubbed for a CBE despite raising a whopping £2million for charity in just six months.

A source told The Sun : “Simon is obviously upset. He’s never been in this game for recognition but at the same time he’s done more than most to entertain and do good.”

News:

Author Topic: Simon Cowell's new face (Read 35940 times)