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Simon Cowell's new face

Started by Nowhere Man, January 19, 2019, 12:31:51 PM

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Al Tha Funkee Homosapien


Ferris

I recently watched the Louis Theroux docco on cheerful grifter Max Clifford, and Simon Cowell pops up in it all the time (the editorial implication from Louis is that it's an attempt to intimidate Louis and/or show off Max's connections).

Cowell is unrecognizable. It is very bizarre.

Al Tha Funkee Homosapien



kalowski


Al Tha Funkee Homosapien


Al Tha Funkee Homosapien



"Go on Simon, give us one of your lovely smiles!"

Al Tha Funkee Homosapien




The Bumlord

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on May 11, 2020, 09:25:14 PM
I recently watched the Louis Theroux docco on cheerful grifter Max Clifford, and Simon Cowell pops up in it all the time (the editorial implication from Louis is that it's an attempt to intimidate Louis and/or show off Max's connections).

Cowell is unrecognizable. It is very bizarre.

Isn't old Simes surprisingly pleasant in that?

A while since I watched it.

Hand Solo

Quote from: Utterdrivel on May 12, 2020, 12:03:50 PM
Isn't old Simes surprisingly pleasant in that?

While saying stuff like "The thing is Louis, I'm an incredibly private person" while standing in the office of the top paid publicist in the land trying to plant fake kiss-and-tell stories in the tabloids almost every day. Doesn't he start trying to dress like Louis too, at some point? That whole doc was creepy.


Ferris

Quote from: Utterdrivel on May 12, 2020, 12:03:50 PM
Isn't old Simes surprisingly pleasant in that?

A while since I watched it.

I thought he came off quite well. A nice fella, if a bit easily lead, who seems slightly confused by the whole thing (to be fair, that is presumably because Max keeps telling him to be at recording studios/offices etc without explaining why).

Quote from: Hand Solo on May 12, 2020, 12:12:54 PM
While saying stuff like "The thing is Louis, I'm an incredibly private person" while standing in the office of the top paid publicist in the land trying to plant fake kiss-and-tell stories in the tabloids almost every day. Doesn't he start trying to dress like Louis too, at some point? That whole doc was creepy.

Yeah it was all a bit odd.

Al Tha Funkee Homosapien


Jerzy Bondov


Fucks sake. Hate it when this happens

imitationleather

Why is he so bothered about people finding out he's gay? He is aware that everyone knows, right?

Hand Solo

Quote from: imitationleather on May 12, 2020, 03:56:19 PM
Why is he so bothered about people finding out he's gay? He is aware that everyone knows, right?

He was on Blind Date and loads of stuff to try and get his career going early on, so he presumably links his success to his image and a load of ladies of a certain age fancying him. And it seems a lot of them are thick and do think he's straight, hence him being in Clifford's office planting stories day and night. He has said the best thing he ever did was hiring Max Clifford.. I've been in gay bars where gay blokes have insisted he's straight because of all the paid-for tabloid nonsense about him having affairs with his best friend's wife and secret lovechild or whatever else, it does seem to work on more credulous people.

The turd on the cake that was beyond the pale was that 'leaked' photo of him holding a young girl in his arms obviously put out by Clifford, the implication was 'Ooh, saucy Simon's into girls on the young side' so presumably being perceived as a paedophile was better than as a homosexual in Cowell and Clifford's career minded eyes. And he's STILL paying for planted stories in the paper over 20 years since the Theroux documentary which spells it all out.  It must be a million times worse with his career on the other side of the pond, seems he's more concerned with his image as a straight man than his actual image being like he's slamming bricks into his face to get to sleep every night.

Ferris

Quote from: imitationleather on May 12, 2020, 03:56:19 PM
Why is he so bothered about people finding out he's gay? He is aware that everyone knows, right?

He's no Phil Schofield.

Hand Solo

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on May 12, 2020, 04:13:09 PM
He%u2019s no Phil Schofield.

That's another one I presumed everyone knew as an open-secret. But then when I told friends he'd publically 'come out' they were shocked, actual shock!

Then again Liberace actually won a court case vs the Daily Mirror insinuating he was gay. Anything goes.

Alberon

It's 2020 and he's in showbiz, who honestly gives a fuck?

The Liberace court case still astonishes me. A more innocent time, but still... He could have gone on RuPaul's Drag Race with most of his outfits.

Al Tha Funkee Homosapien


steve98

It never occurred to me for a minute that Cowell wasn't straight. I just assumed he was like Stringfellow: mad keen on the fanny, and quite happy for the UK public to know about it.
Re Liberace - my late mother in law went to her grave refusing to accept Liberace was "one uh dem funny fellas"(gay)

kalowski

Quote from: steve98 on May 13, 2020, 01:34:17 AM
It never occurred to me for a minute that Cowell wasn't straight. I just assumed he was like Stringfellow: mad keen on the fanny, and quite happy for the UK public to know about it.
Re Liberace - my late mother in law went to her grave refusing to accept Liberace was "one uh dem funny fellas"(gay)
Was your mother in law a caricature black housemaid from a 1940s film?

steve98

She was Oirish. Raised by nuns.

Alberon

#985
Simon Cowell is in the new (apparently awful) Scooby Doo film Scoob.



Second image is SFW, but is a spoiler for the film.

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/851/019/e00.gif

Blumf

It was old man Louis Walsh all along!

Butchers Blind

The cartoon face is more lifelike than Simon's 'real' face.

idunnosomename

Quote from: Butchers Blind on May 17, 2020, 01:27:30 PM
The cartoon face is more lifelike than Simon's 'real' face.
he should just get the reconstructive surgery to look like a moustache-twirling villain

Al Tha Funkee Homosapien