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DESOLATION_V.swf

Started by PlanktonSideburns, January 25, 2019, 03:25:58 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Ferris

A career academic ignores the distinction between "less" and "fewer"

Gregory Torso

Unable to afford a Christmas present this year, your dad turns himself into a train set. "Choo choo, here comes the disappointment express!" his face yells as it disappears into the tunnel of his anus.

petril

Graham Linehan's wife elopes with John Leslie

Shoulders?-Stomach!

The English Channel becomes the Sir David Beckham Investec Channel

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: Gregory Torso on September 10, 2019, 11:42:35 AM
A man on crutches from eating too many spicy nandos birds slouches towards parliament, gurning "pro-rogue, pro-rogue".

He passes a street child that has had its eyesight revoked, gangly arms embracing a tattered anime pillowcase. "nice mum, you kiosk" he sneers.

PRO-ROGUE.

You kiosk

Fucking hell

Shoulders?-Stomach!


a duncandisorderly

Quote from: touchingcloth on September 13, 2019, 12:21:59 AM
Your father becomes a ghost solely to call you a disappointment and an accident.

"right, that's 'hamlet' finished. Anne! I'm off to the pub. you want a carry-out or a bag of chips later?"

Lordofthefiles

An inter-dimensional Grey alien materialises from the aether, looks at you and just shakes it's head.

touchingcloth

Elon Musk begins a full physical relationship with the Thai cave boys' football coach.

a duncandisorderly

Quote from: Lordofthefiles on September 16, 2019, 11:39:14 PM
An inter-dimensional Grey alien materialises from the aether, looks at you and just shakes it's head.

50 times?

NJ Uncut

You yawn walking past a wet-sneezing old man

the midnight watch baboon

A fire envelopes the jizz towels at Bri's birthday bukkake bash, Wolverhampton.

pancreas

Paul Hogan never seems to realise that the Crocodile Dundee animal-hypnotism trick doesn't work on the staff at his sanatorium.

Cuellar

A nervous man is openly mocked at a self-service checkout

petril

Quote from: Cuellar on September 17, 2019, 05:06:02 PM
A nervous man is openly mocked at a self-service checkout

by the self service checkout

Ferris



Berthas Fat Leg

He still dresses like it's 1973.

He still thinks she'll walk back through that door.

touchingcloth

Quote from: pancreas on September 17, 2019, 04:58:04 PM
Paul Hogan never seems to realise that the Crocodile Dundee animal-hypnotism trick doesn't work on the staff at his sanatorium.

You call that a knife? This is a kn...put that syringe down, mucker.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

A wan Geront blackmails a terminally ill concierge for a 'go on the hat'

BlodwynPig

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on September 15, 2019, 07:57:03 PM
A career academic ignores the distinction between "less" and "fewer"


Im not an English prof! I like less more

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Here comes England's Lion, it's the John Terry sex dwarf

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Say his name thrice and he will appear behind you like a weird dwarven sex Uber

petril

from Nigle Farage's wiki page:

QuoteHe likes to relax by fishing alone at night on the Kent coast

touchingcloth

You realise the person you thought you were about to lose your virginity to is nothing more than a common penis thief.

Ferris

Quote from: BlodwynPig on September 17, 2019, 09:42:16 PM

Im not an English prof! I like less more

Sometimes less is more. Makes you think!

Fishfinger

Jeremy the Cement-headed Boy is nudged casually into a canal.

Fishfinger

The 'North Sea Cold Plunge' method of abortion is funded ahead of schedule on Kickstarter. Stretch goals include acid bath, magpie frenzy and running with scissors.

Cuellar

Quote from: petrilTanaka on September 17, 2019, 10:17:12 PM
from Nigle Farage's wiki page:

i bet he does the dirty old bollocks i bet he fucking does

Shoulders?-Stomach!

A gravel voiced polypgender siphons their unseen tears into the workings of a home printer.