DESOLATION_V.swf

[NJ Uncut]

[petril]

a frustrated man punches a dungeon

[seepage]

real life deso: this month's profits just enough to buy some deep brown king prawn balls

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A rising star in a regional phimosis Facebook group is promoted to Lieutenant.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A past it rockstar with day to day cash flow difficulties uses his cunningham incontinence clamp as a capo, only to immediately involuntarily shower his gusset in stale Magners urine.

[Cuntbeaks]

A vegan Fray Bentos

A dole zombie chokes on the roach of a front loaded reefer

Battered chips with extra salt

[seepage]

Battered chips with extra salt

real life deso:
Chips - £2
Chips with salt & chilli flakes: £4

[Ferris]

Ricky Gervais guest stars in an episode of Scooby Doo.

[Cold Meat Platter]

Ricky Gervais presents the Pride of Britain Awards.

[touchingcloth]

Ricky Gervais kidnaps your dad and takes his place.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

A socialite gasses her micropig once it is revealed there are no such thing and her fashion accessory will swiftly attain normal adult pig size.

[NJ Uncut]

Your wife won't consummate the marriage due to Brexit uncertainty

[GMTV]

You realise your phone predicts pornographic terminology as your most used word for every letter of the alphabet.

[Huxleys Babkins]

Huddled under a viaduct, a destitute Ben Dover burns his cock and balls for warmth.

[touchingcloth]

James records his first unboxing video: a pallet of cement.

[petril]

Randall Cunningham flicks a cigarette end and gets nowhere near the bin

[GMTV]

At a Home Bargains work induction coffee break you stand beside two people having a completely normal and bland conversation. You have such little to say you resort to passing off Desolation posts as your own personal anecdotes in a desperate bid to add colour to your life.

[petril]

A solitary fried egg is served in a bus station caff

[Fishfinger]

A nostalgic Darren paints local dogshits white.

[the midnight watch baboon]

Scoliola is rewarded by ma and pa for swishing out an empty jar of cashew butter with 17.3 litres of potable water with a helicopter flight to Tiger Leaping Gorge, China.

[Twit 2]

Skidmarked calzone.

[petril]

Wales' hardest man: Gareth "Gaz Top" Jones

[the midnight watch baboon]

Paul has a =
Shank
Lamb shank
Frozen lamb shank
Lamb shank over Frozen


(on Thursdays)

[pancreas]

A small cache of papers in Disney's archives reveals that Basil the Great Mouse Detective was an escaped paedophile.

[Twit 2]

Christmas muck.

[Cuntbeaks]

A Brexit gammon calls the local Turkish kebab shop owner a p**i Bastard. The only racial slur he knows.

An Arsenal fan gets an unexpected hard on when choking a toothless pug.

A cup-a-soup made with piss.

[petril]

a job advertisement compares the role to applying an elephant's Anusol

[the midnight watch baboon]

John Robins bodyshames Siamese twins with his best words.

[Spoon of Ploff]

An aquagenic urticaria sufferer is only happy when it rains.

[Bence Fekete]

Shirley Manson gets chased onto a bus by a quartet of trapper-goths