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DESOLATION_V.swf

Started by PlanktonSideburns, January 25, 2019, 03:25:58 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Cuellar


Cerys

Holding Mr Mulligan's wake at Dad's.

seepage


Gregory Torso

A road crosses a group of school children.

pancreas

A fart is heard at a dinner party. People shuffle away. Macaulay Culkin is left on his own.

Ferris

The best desolation post you ever came up with is shoddily pilfered in an inferior manner but the duplicitous larceny wins many plaudits.

Cerys

Paddington Bear is sold to the sex slave trade - blinded, muzzled, and arse-shaved.  Aunt Lucy's letters go unanswered.  The Browns buy a Jacuzzi.

Ferris

Your apoplectic rage is proved to be entirely impotent.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Your relationship lasts for a further week only on account of a heartfelt rendition of America by Razorlight.

poo

Following an unexpected £1500 repair bill from Renault, Martin contemplates a February without prostitutes.

poo

A lifestyle vlogger convinces you to eat a bobble hat boiled in piss.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Your only birthday card is from Glen Dimplex

It reads 'Happy Birthday ______________'

poo

An erection in Specsavers costs you dearly.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

3 hour delay en route to Plymouth because your train driver 'isn't feeling it'.

Cerys

An agoraphobic turd refuses to emerge from Martin's arse.

Ferris


pancreas

Cuadrilla starts fracking hedgehogs.

poo

Your dead dad sends you a postcard from Ibiza.

Cuellar

A 'deep dive' into your failings as a lover, father, human

petril

as you die, Stephen J Cannell types away and then removes the paper from his typewriter with a flourish. Then that jingle plays. He was wearing the popped collar polo shirt

Gregory Torso

WH Smith reveals that it has always been an acronym for We Hate Seeing Muslims In The Highstreet

BlodwynPig

An Aero now costs 32 quid in WH Smiths post-Brexit, yet still the crowds picnic for Britain

Pingers

The Cambozola King is mugged by a brie in Slough

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: Cuellar on January 29, 2020, 10:28:44 AM
A 'deep dive' into your failings as a lover, father, human

Having to produce a report and presentation about it for your operations manager.

derek stitt

A grooming gang shows it's support for Brexit by only fucking British kids.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

The upper Palatinate is put on notice that Dreadzone are about to release a new EP

Fishfinger

One more spaniel sent to heaven with the use of an inherited 9-iron. Good, but something bigger next time. He left a whole bag of these sticks. Janet, up the road, she never liked me Quavers.

idunnosomename


Fishfinger

2021, and formed meat products contain less than 15% mechanically-recovered sputum.

petril