DESOLATION_V.swf

[poo]

"Introducing the new all-wheel drive Tesla Neil Jenkins."

[poo]

Elon Musk miniaturises himself and lives out the rest of his life having mad adventures inside Neil Jenkins.

[poo]

Elon Musk and Neil Jenkins "smash" the Mumbles Mile.

[poo]

"Neil Jenkins to Pluto" - Tesla's new mission statement revealed.

[petril]

Elon Musk meets Paul Ross for a gangland negotiation

[poo]

Elon Musk and Neil Jenkins 2 dine for £10.

[Huxleys Babkins]

A massive cheer goes up in Ally Pally as Peter Kay plays Tony Christie and shouts "Shabba".

[Chollis]

Ray Mears' smear tests

[poo]

Doctor says bum hospital

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Doctor says Neil Jenkins

[bgmnts]

Being stuck in a battle in the Ardennes in 1944.

Then waking up, sweat drenched, in Hull.

[pancreas]

Paul Ross lets homeless people sleep in his garden but only if they ask him questions after an two hour lecture on his Gestetner.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Leominster decide collectively to 'get their act together', though the actionable minutes agreed at the meeting result in the slaughter of 84 economically inactive.

[ollyboro]

(For any Gogglebox fans) Giles Nutty has just described the following desolation.

"Yes! It's like Jerry from work. Everyday, after work, he goes home, strips his clothes off, then eats a cold bean sandwich over a sink."

[Cerys]

Angela huddles under the duvet, feeling the wash of her bladder release seep under her thighs.  Mmm, she thinks in her final moments.  Warm.

[poo]

ELON MUSK (pointing at Neil Jenkins): "He crabbin!!"

[Chicory]

A scumbag's cacophonous morning shits wake a fragile junior doctor from 45 minutes of light, terrified sleep.

[Pingers]

A scumbag's cacophonous morning shits wake a fragile junior doctor from 45 minutes of light, terrified sleep.

Full name: Simon Cumbag

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

The Gala that inspired the bakers to prepare the iconic repast Gala Pie for the very first time.

Cloaked plague victims shambling across a frigid clearing. A maypole of human bones creaking in the ghostly wind. The human frog charges thruppence for unnatural intercisions. An uncategorized beast of the deep emerges from a cauldron of gruel, yawns and excretes from its tendrils. A town crier dressed back to front exacerbates his gout in order to scream at ever high volume. A provincial dignitary glowers at the rabble atop a foetid escarpment. Bunting coloured only brown is ripped from its moorings and used to cut off blood supply to a rotten leg. The sawmaster surgeon general emerges stomping from his camp of death. It is feeding time for the Larvae of Saarbrucken, contracted in to appall and nauseate. A list of stillbirths is pinned to a diseased tree. The gala pie is unveiled from a sheath of human skin.

[Twit 2]

Ginsters Slice.

[Foggy Buntwhistle]

 The bushes become sentient and start whispering and muttering about your rapidly thinning hair when you walk past.

[Foggy Buntwhistle]

Fart of a man sluices out the gusset of his grey pants in your kitchen sink.

[poo]

Your holiday rep on a TUI all-inclusive is a cylinder of egg from a gala pie.

[Foggy Buntwhistle]

A man so gammon he looks red shifted.

[Foggy Buntwhistle]

A cylinder of egg from a gala pie is what you meet when you die. Quite the surprise.

[poo]

15 minute video of Neil Jenkins eating a big gala pie.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Elon Musk exo-suit abandoned by Krang, occupied by gala pie

[petril]

gala pie eaten by Paul Ross after being glassed

[Spoon of Ploff]

Trevor makes the decision to self isolate. He's never even heard of the Corona virus.

[dr_christian_troy]

A man tries to look at hardcore graphic pornography on his phone on a train during rush hour. He is dismayed that he appears to have now watched all the fart porn that exists online. His anxiety heightens when a slight erection rubs up against the back of a tall bald man. The bald man doesn't appear to notice but then he eventually turns around facing the man when someone exits the train at the next stop. The tall man breathes heavily and he hasn't cleaned his teeth. The erection goes full-on but is then knocked aggressively by a folded bike being bought onto the train by a wet cyclist. The man wonders if he feels cum or blood in his trousers.