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DESOLATION_V.swf

Started by PlanktonSideburns, January 25, 2019, 03:25:58 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Shoulders?-Stomach!

"You just got venerealed in the disease"

Legend Gary practises that one in the mirror a few times before saving it for later.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Horace's duvet made of blood clots and shredded wheat is used to shroud a dead toddler, whose autopsy report reads 78% Monster Energy Drink

Shoulders?-Stomach!

A hawk has a swoop to enjoy a cracking pair of tits and clunge, then remembers the upskirting law and tuts. If it's one rule for them it's another rule for u...oh wait I'm a hawk

Shoulders?-Stomach!

A shoebox filled with what appear to be Janet's memoirs provokes excitement in the Bentley household. "Go on, she'd have loved to share these with us!"

"..... Wednesday 19th March 1982....Wank 1,982. Three minutes fifty four seconds. Orgasm 7/10."

There's a commotion in the room.

But.... But.... 19th March 1982 was a Friday!"

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Gavin pictures his face encased in carvings of warm pork

Ferris

A casual labourer hums Inna Gadda Da Vida while digging a grave.

Ave Maria rolls around Horace's head as he calmly dispatches his 2,00th pig. He sees beauty in the slaughter.

PlanktonSideburns

Quote from: Foggy Buntwhistle on February 05, 2019, 07:12:17 AM
Ave Maria rolls around Horace's head as he calmly dispatches his 2,00th pig. He sees beauty in the slaughter.

He finds it helpful to think of them as pigs. Keeps the bad thoughts away. They really are just like thin pigs these days anyway: naked, can't speak English anymore, squealing and covorting in their pen out the back. Horace doesn't even think about liveLeak any more

ToneLa

My cock is so huge, that if I laid it out on my keyboard it could stretch from A to Z

BlodwynPig

A misplaced comma sees Horace thrown screaming into the lean pig pit.

derek stitt

Quote from: ToneLa on February 05, 2019, 06:28:25 PM
My cock is so huge, that if I laid it out on my keyboard it could stretch from A to Z

Applause

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Lots of things have happened to Horace already on this page. Gloom and despair for Horace.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

A dream where you walk aggressively up to Thai people shouting ME GOTCHOO WHI BOI for 18 hours

batwings

A turd clogs up a treadmill in a Felixstowe old people's home.







Ferris

Minced pies served at a wake.

ToneLa

No mate, I know what you mean. I hate neo Nazis too, can't stand em. What's all that about eh? They're getting it so, so wrong, I just can't condemn neo Nazis enough.

I'm an OG, myself.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

A maundy antipode flecks the scum off a malattended beaker.

Chollis

A 4 year old is left crestfallen after her finger painting is dismissed as "absolute gubbins" by her father

dex

Ethel complains of the cold, so the sloven and lazy care worker tells her to smear herself in her own shit to "coat up".

batwings

On a Bridgwater towpath, a stray dog laps at the opening of a soiled Fleshlight.

a duncandisorderly

Quote from: batwings on February 06, 2019, 06:04:46 PM
On a Bridgwater towpath, a stray dog laps at the opening of a soiled Fleshlight.

that's right put me off my tea, that has.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: a duncandisorderly on February 06, 2019, 10:26:12 PM
that's right put me off my tea, that has.

I'm eating homemade ragu and feeling queasy.

Cloud


batwings

Quote from: a duncandisorderly on February 06, 2019, 10:26:12 PM
that's right put me off my tea, that has.

Sorry. Shouldn't have mentioned Bridgwater.

PlanktonSideburns

Something awful happens to an ugly person in a place with a LOW COUNCIL TAX BAND

And to top it all off
















DOG POO


WOOOOOOOOH

PlanktonSideburns

Needs to work on his sausage factory gag reflex

PlanktonSideburns

Petrol station rustlers burger birthday

This can either be a sad evet or sad American child name

PlanktonSideburns

Twattemburg more like

An ungrateful bakers child mutters

"This building used to be a wonderful old toy shop," says Bill, "run by a lovely old bloke in a waistcoat. I remember the laughter of the children like it was yesterday."

Philippa smiles at him and bends over, pulling her cheeks apart so he can see her balloon knot.

"Not much demand for that any more." He sighs, retrieves another £10 note from his waistcoat pocket and puts it in her garter.

ToneLa

"Oh, take me anywhere! I am an adventurer, I seek romance! I want to see the world! I don't care where we are going, take me away, take me away!"

"This bus line ends at Little Wakering, love."