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Anyone been to Thailand?

Started by Hat FM, February 05, 2019, 02:18:21 PM

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Hat FM

I'm going at the weekend. All over the place. Anyone got any specific recommendations? I'm going to Bangkok, Chaing Mai and krabi along with some other places. Girlfriend has booked most of it tbh...

Cuellar

Yes, it's good. Bangkok will be hot, Chaing Mai less so. Get stuck in.

Hat FM

Chiang Mai is about 35 apparently. crikes.

Cuellar


Paul Calf

Chiang Mai is fucking excellent. I'd recommend visiting Pai, which is nearby. If you're feeling flush, you can get a 9-seater Caravelle light aircraft from Chiang Mai to Pai. I don't recommend this if you're at all afraid of flying, however.

https://www.cleartrip.com/flight-booking/kan-air-airlines.html

Krabi is a good choice, but generally avoid the islands as much as possible because while they're beautiful, chilled and lovely, they're also infested by the mafia and Ko Tao at least is rumoured to be home to at least one serial killer protected by local connections

https://www.news.com.au/travel/travel-updates/warnings/families-of-murdered-tourists-on-koh-tao-dubbed-death-island-warn-tourists-to-stay-away/news-story/b078e937a7510db09e174aa61be54f24

Bangkok is wicked - one of my favourite big cities on earth (second only to Kathmandu) but hot as fuck. Head for Soi Rambuttri where there are bars, cafes, restaurants and hotels catering specifically to jet-lagged westerners arriving in the middle of the night.

Never get into a tuktuk in Bangkok, and neve get into a taxi that's stationary at the side of the road. Wheh priced honestly, Bangkok taxis are some of the cheapest in the world so when you finally get one who'll use his meter (don't get into one that won't) tip generously.

Paul Calf

And quickly:

Don't believe anyone who tells you that a particular attraction is closed or no good and get out of any taxi as soon as you can if the driver suggests visiting his friend's shop\restaurant\hotel.

gib

#6
Yes, lots of people have been to Thailand, nearly all of them sexual perverts.

Hat FM

thanks Paul.
add another one to that once i shake off the girlfriend Gib...


Buelligan

Another massive round of applause for Chiang Mai and Bangkok.  Had no troubles with tuktuk drivers ripping me off but maybe I am naturally charming.  Never tell a taxi driver in Bangkok it's your first trip though and never let them show you good places to eat or anything.  I am so jealous of you.  Loved all of Chiang Mai, particularly loved the flower market in Bangkok and the Golden Buddha and the Thieves Market at night but just going out into the streets, provided you have water with you (and I'm usually pretty heat-proof) is just incredible.  I would go back in an instant.  Even liked the tramp steamers to the islands (but I think Paul's correct, you're not guaranteed safe in those places).  Also, do not try to buy drugs, I met some American lads there who'd had all their money "confiscated" by the police (who actually took them to the ATM and ordered them to empty out) after meeting a guy in a bar who said he could get them some weed.  Just be reasonably careful and you will have a marvelous time.  Great cheap veggie food too.  Bloody lovely.

Hat FM

ha yeah i think the old druggles are best avoided.  Didnt know about the mafia on the island but i'll be practising my best italian american accent so that they think i'm one of them. Fool proof idea eh? I'm of irish descent so worries about dying from the heat but what can you do eh? death comes to us all as a great man once said.

Buelligan

Drink plenty of clean water, avoid alcohol, go out in the evenings or early mornings.  Be completely naked.

Oh, and always be polite.  Thai people are very mannerly and like a bit of the old reciprocal (as do we all).  And don't be rude about the Royals (that is important).

Paul Calf

Yes. Smile all the time, even when you're being ripped off. In Thailand, it's always easier to resolve something when you're smiling. And adding my voice to the chorus of "Never say anything that could be interpreted as even the mildest criticism of the Royal Family". At the very least you'll cause serious offence and you can easily end up in prison. Westerners (farang) can be and are imprisoned for lese majestè; when I was there a Swiss man who lived in CM was on trial for defacing posters of the king. He got 10 years, but was released on a pardon and deported after 6 months or so.

Cuellar

Go to Chatuchak market (in Bangkok) and go insane.

Paul Calf

Go to Siam Paragon and wonder who has the money to purchase a car that costs more than your house and a handbag that costs more than your car. Also, enjoy the air conditioning there.

If you like technology, got to Pantip Plaza:

https://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/ShowUserReviews-g293916-d3445545-r483224768-Pantip_Plaza-Bangkok.html

five floors of electronics, including a top floor the size of several football pitches full of stalls that sell only phones.

Go to Nana Plaza with your girlfriend and watch the 70-year-old Germans and Brits escorting 20-year-old Thai women. It's worth seeing, just once.

Paul Calf

You bastard. I wish I was going to Thailand.

Dex Sawash


Hat FM

Quote from: Cuellar on February 05, 2019, 04:06:15 PM
Go to Chatuchak market (in Bangkok) and go insane.

How so? crazy busy or fun?

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote"Never say anything that could be interpreted as even the mildest criticism of the Royal Family". At the very least you'll cause serious offence and you can easily end up in prison. Westerners (farang) can be and are imprisoned for lese majestè; when I was there a Swiss man who lived in CM was on trial for defacing posters of the king. He got 10 years, but was released on a pardon and deported after 6 months or so.

Britain 2028

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on February 05, 2019, 09:16:37 PM
Britain 2028

We'll probably have dysentery and sex tourists by then as well.

Sherringford Hovis

Quote from: Buelligan on February 05, 2019, 03:39:02 PM
Drink plenty of clean water, avoid alcohol...

Thailand is the birthplace of Krating Daeng and M150: the progenitors of Red Bull and its ilk. Modern descendants include: Lipovitan D Super (2000 mg taurine & 300 mg arginine) and MAXIO (3000 mg taurine). The label on both products warn not to consume more than 100 ml per day. It's more of a guideline than a rule - q.v. Thai taxi drivers


Paul Calf

And the bus drivers. Fuckers drive like they're trying to take off.

The Red Bull family are pretty much the richest family in Thailand. They have enormous power and get away (literally) with murder.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-39427291

QuoteAmong the many uncertainties hanging over Thailand as it is steered hesitantly through a delicate political transition, its people could be sure of one thing this week.
That Vorayuth Yoovidhaya, the grandson of the billionaire who invented the energy drink Red Bull, would once again fail to appear at a Bangkok prosecutor's office to face charges relating to the death of a police officer.
On 3 September 2012, that officer was struck by a Ferrari driven by Mr Vorayuth.
The sometimes farcical attempts by the Thai authorities to bring Mr Vorayuth to justice are now commonly cited as epitomising the untouchability of the super-rich in Thailand.

On that subject, probably best not to mention what everyone knows about the Thai Royal Family: that the last king, Bhumipol, murdered his own brother to secure his own accession and since he died, Thailand has been in constitutional crisis because his son, Vajiralongkorn, is endowed with the kind of special intelligence that comes from centuries of selective intramarriage and a few years ago, he threw a birthday party for his dog, during which he compelled his girlfriend to wait naked on the table of said dog.

This is the King of Thailand since 2016. Thai people are worried about this - the king is virtually a living god with absolute power over his subjects- but can't really talk about it for fear of prison.

Thailand is s crazy place. You're going to love it.

monkfromhavana

It all sounds rather prison-heavy to me.

Crisps?

Paul, Paul, Paul, Paul. Come on...

MidnightShambler

Thailand is a great place, you'll love it. Don't be put off by thoughts of the heat in Chiangmai though, it was 38 when I was there but it was manageable. Besides, there's a stall selling fresh fruit slushies every 30 yards so staying hydrated won't be a problem. While you're in Chiangmai, you've got to go to Zoe In Yellow, which is a complex with about thirty bars in all catering to different themes. I saw an absolutely shit hot Thai reggae band in one of them, which you wouldn't imagine to be great but was.  Also, hardly any prostitutes there, which is a nice break.

Everywhere is great really, all the advice from everybody else is sound, you'll love it in every place you choose. Except Patong. Don't ever go to Patong.

Cuellar

Quote from: Sherringford Hovis on February 05, 2019, 09:58:26 PM
Thailand is the birthplace of Krating Daeng and M150: the progenitors of Red Bull and its ilk. Modern descendants include: Lipovitan D Super (2000 mg taurine & 300 mg arginine) and MAXIO (3000 mg taurine). The label on both products warn not to consume more than 100 ml per day. It's more of a guideline than a rule - q.v. Thai taxi drivers

We got a taxi from our door on Koh Chang to Bangkok's central station (to catch the night train to Chiang Mai (upon which we were kept awake all night by the guard loudly watching porn on his phone. If you want to catch that book well well well in advance and get a first class berth)) and it took around 6 hours.

About half way our guy stopped into a service station and loaded up on these things. About an hour out of Bangkok on the motorway the cunt was driving like a complete maniac, undertaking massive lorries on the hard shoulder, going about 100mph. He'd occasionally stop on the hard shoulder to slap himself in the face a bit and neck another energy drink. Thank christ we eventually got into the traffic of the city and he had to slow down. He still couldn't follow the satnav and it took us bloody ages to finally get to the station, but by god the poor man must have been absolutely fucked.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Paul Calf on February 05, 2019, 02:38:05 PM
Chiang Mai is fucking excellent. I'd recommend visiting Pai, which is nearby. If you're feeling flush, you can get a 9-seater Caravelle light aircraft from Chiang Mai to Pai. I don't recommend this if you're at all afraid of flying, however.

https://www.cleartrip.com/flight-booking/kan-air-airlines.html

Krabi is a good choice, but generally avoid the islands as much as possible because while they're beautiful, chilled and lovely, they're also infested by the mafia and Ko Tao at least is rumoured to be home to at least one serial killer protected by local connections

https://www.news.com.au/travel/travel-updates/warnings/families-of-murdered-tourists-on-koh-tao-dubbed-death-island-warn-tourists-to-stay-away/news-story/b078e937a7510db09e174aa61be54f24

Bangkok is wicked - one of my favourite big cities on earth (second only to Kathmandu) but hot as fuck. Head for Soi Rambuttri where there are bars, cafes, restaurants and hotels catering specifically to jet-lagged westerners arriving in the middle of the night.

Never get into a tuktuk in Bangkok, and neve get into a taxi that's stationary at the side of the road. Wheh priced honestly, Bangkok taxis are some of the cheapest in the world so when you finally get one who'll use his meter (don't get into one that won't) tip generously.

Bob Monkhouse's son died of a heroin overdose in Pai.

My colleague spent his time in Chiang Mai taking drugs and fucking prostitutes for free instead of attending a conference.


MidnightShambler

The horror stories you hear about taxis and tuktuks are largely from absolute cheapskates and fucking mingebags who spend the whole time they're travelling being joyless tightarses. They type of people who'll stay in a £3 a night cockroach-infested hostel and get bitten to fuck, only eat noodle-pots from 7-11s and stick to 3 beers a night.
Just agree a price before you get in the cab even if they haven't got a meter, even if you get ripped off it will cost you fuck all. When I first landed in Bangkok a couple of years ago, I got a cab outside the airport (a big no-no apparently) and he wanted 500 baht to take me to Silom. I had no idea how far Silom was but £9.50 for a taxi to my hotel at 2am seemed alright. It was a 45 minute drive through some of the worst traffic on earth and the poor cunt had to drive back to the airport after that. When I told people they laughed and couldn't believe how badly I'd been ripped off. £9.50. Imagine how much that would have cost here. It's all relative. Don't worry about it.

I've also just remembered a Danish girl I met (who became a good friend) in Bangkok. It turned out we were both leaving for Phuket the next day but hadn't booked transport. She decided to get the 14hr night bus (not a sleeper either) because the flight was too expensive. The bus was £17, I paid £23 for my flight and was there in an hour. I mean, how tight can you be?

Buelligan

I went on a bus from Bangkok to Chiang Mai, not because it was cheap but because I hate flying and avoid it when I can and I wanted to see what it was like. 

It was something unlike anything I'd done before or since, so I'm glad I did it but would not recommend unless you've never done it before and you want to know what it's like.  Then do it.

MidnightShambler

Quote from: Buelligan on February 06, 2019, 07:10:43 PM
I went on a bus from Bangkok to Chiang Mai, not because it was cheap but because I hate flying and avoid it when I can and I wanted to see what it was like. 

It was something unlike anything I'd done before or since, so I'm glad I did it but would not recommend unless you've never done it before and you want to know what it's like.  Then do it.

I'm all for bus travel generally, it's a great way to see a country (one that's not just all motorways, anyway) but sometimes you've got to weigh up how much of your life you're gonna lose by doing it that way. I'd happily get the bus to Chiangmai from Bangkok for the experience cos it's not ridiculously long (it's about 8 hours isn't it?), although only in the daytime so I could actually see something. 14 hours is just too long to be sat on a cramped, sweaty bus though. If you don't like flying then obviously, fair enough, that's the way it's got to be. But to save £6? Unbelievable.

Her boyfriend was the youngest Neurosurgeon in Denmark (which is an odd but marvellous claim to fame) as well, so she was hardly short of a bob or two. Tighter than two coats of paint.