I'm thinking of getting a cat

[MiddleRabbit]

Forgot to mention ours is an indoor cat. 

The reason for this is because in my years as a non cat owner, I found them to be a total pain in the arse: shitting in our garden, leaving mauled birds and frogs dying outside the door and what have you.

Cats, being dickheads and cunts, shouldn't be allowed out in the same way that murderers and rapists shouldn't be.  You know, if you want to live with one, that's your choice but inflicting them on your neighbourhood is a bit much if you ask me.

As it turns out ours is so fucking stupid it's probably for the best because he'd have lasted about twenty seconds outside.

Sanctimonious cat owner hating new page cunt.

On the other hand, I do bring moths in for him to murder because I don't give a fuck about insects.

[Harley_Quim]

My desire for an indoor cat is because my fences aren't very high in places so the cat could get over walls, and because I am concerned about he/she getting out and into the road when I am not there. I am happy for he/she to go in the back garden when I am there watching he/she.

I was thinking of making my spare room the cat room. He/she can go anywhere they want to in the house aside from the bathroom - the lino is manky as is the bath.

I do have a cat flap on my front door but it requires a special collar to open. No cat flap on the back door.

Good to know a female cat is a better option for an indoor cat.

I have two cats, one male and one female, both indoor cats, although the male was allowed to go outside in his younger years. I only suggest a female cat because the male one became very ill a few years back with constant urinary tract blockages from the stress of meeting other cats outside - and I had to endure many hard months of him adjusting to life on the inside after the vet strictly told me that his days of conquering the malcontents (any other cat he saw outside) were over. He's since gotten used to it (he doesn't even try to run outside when the door is open anymore) and has settled for the much more relaxing pastime of simply screaming abuse at any interlopers that come into view from any of the windows in the house until they go away, but those months of adjustment were hard on all of us, including the older female cat he shares the house with.

Its probably a blessing that your bathroom will be strictly off limits from the get-go, because my two moggies are particularly fond of the amplifying acoustics of the bath tub and take great pleasure in using it to add strength to any of their demands which may have been missed by me the first time for whatever reason and the sink is considered the must-have luxury sleeping area that is well worth a little punch up to claim. I often brush my teeth in the kitchen sink just to avoid conflict.

[lipsink]

I have the one cat who is indoors during the day but I let her run around outside in the morning and at night. It's a bit of a pain at arse if you come home and you're shattered and the fucker is buzzing with energy and wants to play. I would quite like to get a cat flap but I'm afraid she might wander off. I wish I'd got 2 cats at the same time so she'd have company during the day. I've heard you shouldn't get another cat if you already have one as they'll fight cos the first one will be all territorial.

[Buelligan]

I think you're wise to try to keep your cat away from the road but maybe, you could consider walking it like a dog - I've never done it myself but I've seen plenty doing it, maybe they need to get used to the idea from kittenhood.  It might be a way to give your cat a more interesting life and to meet nice people yourself.

And remember, cats are individuals, I've had a fair few and each of them was completely different from the others - none of them wanted to climb onto shelves or high places, only one of them scratched furniture, one of them pee'd around the place for a while and then stopped for ever and kept to the litter tray (I'm guessing maybe he was ill or anxious). 

The only rules IMO are to look after them like you'd want to be looked after yourself.  Love them.  And I would never shut them in a room unless it was for their protection (if a terrier was visiting for instance).  You don't need to force anything on them or discipline them, just open your mind and they will see who you are and what you prefer.

[DistressedArea]

If you get a cat DO NOT LET IT SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH or you will turn into a cat.

The cat will most likely try to do this while you are asleep.

Cat shit is extremely dangerous.

[Harley_Quim]

I have the one cat who is indoors during the day but I let her run around outside in the morning and at night. It's a bit of a pain at arse if you come home and you're shattered and the fucker is buzzing with energy and wants to play. I would quite like to get a cat flap but I'm afraid she might wander off. I wish I'd got 2 cats at the same time so she'd have company during the day. I've heard you shouldn't get another cat if you already have one as they'll fight cos the first one will be all territorial.

Cats can learn to live with one another over time, but the most important part is not to get involved in any conflicts during the time the new cat is in the house - they'll work out the living arrangements themselves without some dumb human butting in every time an argument starts. Make sure there's plenty of space for them to avoid one another if they have to and never isolate one from the other because that would just lengthen the conflict and double the amount of litter trays in the house - two for each cat minimum. Fights will always break out intermittently between the grudge bearing wee gits even after they've learned they have to live together - break them up if it gets particularly nasty, but always let them work out the aftermath (usually a lot of skulking away from one and chest beating from the other) themselves. You'll be surprised how often you come out as the evil, oppressive human overlord of kittykind when you get involved in cat-feuds - my two take great pleasure in starting fights only to spend the rest of the day cozying up to one another and shooting me bad looks after I dared to interrupt important diplomatic negotiations.

[biggytitbo]

I'd give the same advice to the cat about human shit.

[biggytitbo]

These Devon Rex cats are good

[bgmnts]

My suggestion would be a hamster. Low maintenance as fuck but still mega therapeutic to cwtch and treat.

[Harley_Quim]

I think you're wise to try to keep your cat away from the road but maybe, you could consider walking it like a dog - I've never done it myself but I've seen plenty doing it, maybe they need to get used to the idea from kittenhood.  It might be a way to give your cat a more interesting life and to meet nice people yourself.

And remember, cats are individuals, I've had a fair few and each of them was completely different from the others - none of them wanted to climb onto shelves or high places, only one of them scratched furniture, one of them pee'd around the place for a while and then stopped for ever and kept to the litter tray (I'm guessing maybe he was ill or anxious). 

The only rules IMO are to look after them like you'd want to be looked after yourself.  Love them.  And I would never shut them in a room unless it was for their protection (if a terrier was visiting for instance).  You don't need to force anything on them or discipline them, just open your mind and they will see who you are and what you prefer.

Couldn't agree more with this. I can only offer advice from my own personal perspective, but its the owners responsibility to adjust the rules to suit the cat through simple trial and error. The most important thing is to get to know the animal - cats don't come with instruction manuals, just vague guidelines.

[flotemysost]

We had a cat called Jet

Aw, that was my kitty's name too. He also used to expel fetid puddles of indeterminate bodily fluids over beds and people in moments of stress. Happy days. (That was a great story, btw)

Re: loneliness/getting accustomed to a new cat, could you get siblings from the same litter? Mine were brothers and generally kept each other occupied during the day by alternating between cuddling and attempting to kill one another.

[flotemysost]

Also, to echo what others have said... if the cat isn't already neutered/spayed when you acquire it, please make sure you get this done once they're old enough - I think it's about £40 for a male cat and twice as much for a female (although it's been a long time since I looked into it).

Even if you keep them indoors, females will come on heat and do their utmost to get out and find a sexy local man cat, and male tomcats will get aggressive and piss everywhere. And keeping a horny unspayed cat indoors is no mean feat either - a friend's house kitten (who he didn't see the point in getting spayed) managed to escape during her first heat when she was about five months old, and is now probably dead or creating more unwanted kittens. It's not worth it.

[Sebastian Cobb]

We had a cat called Jet who chose to sleep nights on our bedroom windowsill. One night we had just settled into bed & Jet was in the window, there was the familiar sound of licking as he was grooming himself. The licking got louder and more urgent until there was an explosion of movement.

Jet shot out from behind the curtains, jumped across to Mrs Sheds' pillow, leapt over her head, landed on my face, jumped off that and rattled down the stairs, almost destroying the flap as he exited the house via the kitchen door catflap.

Then the smell hit us. Like a cocktail of rancid milk, musky cheese and shit. I noticed something damp on my cheek. We put the bedroom light on. There was a bright pink streak of steaming, stinking liquid across our pillows, along the bedroom carpet, on the walls of the landing, stairs and on my fucking face.

Mrs Sheds - a one time vetinary nurse - remarked that Jet had probably been licking his arse on the windowsill and over stimulated his blocked anal glands to the point of no return. All this was imparted as I  scrubbed his stinking arse gravy off the carpets and walls.

It's without doubt the worst smell I have ever smelled (and I've smelled a tramp really close up).

Jet was around before Mrs Sheds & I got together. He despised me at first when I moved in, going to barely controlled hostility when he realised I wasn't leaving. Eventually we coexisted in a state of acknowledging each other's existence without interacting. When he first curled into my lap and let me stroke him after so many years of hostility, it was an amazing moment.

When he got old and blind I felt really bad for laughing at him when he would fall off the arm of the sofa he'd managed to climb onto.

I still miss the cantankerous old fucker.

Cats!

At least he tried. When I was about 14 I stayed over at a mates and woke up early to a weird gurgling sound. When I opened my eyes I saw the business end of their cat slowly bubbling out liquid shit at the foot of my sleeping bag while the rest of the cat was frozen like a statue.

[Barry Admin]

I love my cat, I smile every morning when I think about getting out of bed to go and see him. Usually he'd sleep at the foot of my bed, but I leave a little heater on for him in the living room, in this weather. He loves to lie in front of it, it costs a fortune. If I'm wearing trousers or jeans, he will often jump up into my lap, and turn to face the right, if he hasn't already settled in his preferred direction. I'll put my controller or phone down and just focus on him, stroke him, appreciate his presence, tell him I love him. I pick him up in the kitchen before I feed him and give him a cuddle, I've done this ever since I got him so he'd be comfortable with being held and associate it with food. I buy him packets of ham, and treats, and know when he comes up and sits at the side of me looking eager, that he'll most likely be wanting a brush, which may then have him drooling in pleasure. Sometimes he follows me around the estate at night when I go out for a walk, he stands with me as I play my stupid AR game on my phone, and then trots in front of me on the way back home.

I would say, yeah, get a cat, it's the best thing I ever did, and I love Jelly to bits, and he makes my life better every single day. I just look at him and I smile. We've been buddies for 11 years now, a long time.

[madhair60]

That's fair warmed my heart, that.

[greenman]

The most enjoyable part - for me - is that Mrs Middlerabbit is desperate for the cat to love her and show her affection and the more she tries to get him to love her, the less attention he pays her and the more attention he pays me.  I make no effort at all to ingratiate myself to the cat and yet he sits on me, sleeps on me, rubs his head against my legs, does that blinking thing.

Maybe down to eye contact? sort of the opposite of dogs were they like it and show attention to people who are nervous of them because they look at them more, cats seem to dislike it so someone showing them more attention might be ignored more as there also staring at them.

I'd say cats are less pets for people who don't like to put the work in and more children for people who don't like to put the work in or have them ever grow up

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

That's fair warmed my heart, that.

Whereas I feel like throwing up (this isn't aimed directly at yer man Barry, but at the general tweeness going on in the comments in this thread . Somebody wrote something like "this cat sidled up and said "hello" to (them) ". No it didn't, it made a fucking cat sound to you. If it had actually said "hello", in the English language, you'd have shat yourself , or thought you were going mental , or something . It could have just been saying "fuck off, you cunt" to you, for all you know. My "have a wank " thread got moved, too) >:-(

[Barry Admin]

Well, I was really glad to read Flouncers post and see how positive that cat has been in his life. You can tell instinctively when a cat is saying hello to you, but a more scientific method is to observe if their tail is raised up, which is an invitation to sniff their anal scent glands. Perhaps you should go and say hello to a cat, Lisa.

[Jumblegraws]

These Devon Rex cats are good

They're great. I mean, all cats are, but Devon Rexes are just swell.


Re: getting a second cat. As in all things, the response will vary between individual cats. My cat Mookie basically adopted Arthur when he was a kitten and they've been best friends since. I make no apology for using this is an excuse to post photographic evidence:


Consensus seems to be I lucked out a fair bit, though. My friend's cats were standoffish when the second one was first brought home and the relationship has deteriorated to occasional full-on fighting since then.

[Buelligan]

Ohh, bloody hell Jumblegraws, if I didn't feel like my next ones should be strays, I'd be converted, those two are absolutely beautiful.  You're very lucky!

Just to add, I had three at the peak.  All arrived at different times (when they decided to), one old girl and two lads.  Fats, the girl, was the oldest, smallest and longest established, she pretty much despised the lads and ignored them but would smack them round the ear if they tried to eat from her bowl or got too close.  The two lads got along fine but never spent any time together.  All three had their own little territories, which they all respected.  It sometimes used to get a bit competitive when they wanted to be on my lap or get brushed but apart from that (which wasn't much), it was all very peaceable.

[bgmnts]

Wait til they have mega squits in your face. Not so beautiful then.

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

I'm glad that myself and by bgmnts are being the voice of reason in this thread. Say " hello " to a cat indeed. Say " cunt off, feline fucker " is what I'll say to a cat, so I will.
Cats, indeed. Cuh.

[greencalx]

We had a female rescue cat who we were told had previously lived indoors, which was just as well because we lived in a top floor flat at the time. She was middle-aged when we got her, so still had some fight in her, and would go out from time to time particularly after we moved to a house with a garden. After the first few excursions, she decided outdoors was for other people and spent the rest of her life boiling her head on the radiator. She passed away last year as her kidneys gave way. During the last few months she was a bit careless with her wees, and in the last few days her poos, but other than that she pretty much looked after herself.

She fucking hated me though.

[another Mr. Lizard]

Our cat somehow managed to turn our internet off this evening.

He's lovely.

[jobotic]

I like it when they do that contented briefly closing their eyes thing as they look at you, and how they like you doing it back to them.

I'm going to stop reading this thread, I want a cat again and it's making me feel sad.

[Twed]

Flouncer, your cat story is very similar to the story of almost every cat that has entered my life. They simply chose to meet me and then come and live with me, acting like such perfect creatures you'd think they had special training in how to be effortlessly loving companions.

[chrispmartha]

We've got two indoor cats, brother and sister Ragdolls, Ive had cats all my life but I am glad weve got indoor cats (Ragdolls have to be kept indoors mainly because they are far too relaxed and lacking street smarts). Now I know we should really be going to cat rescue rather than breeders but TBH we really wanted the ragdolls as they are known for their relaxed nature. They are the most beautiful loving things, both with totally different personalities, the boy cat is a total softy and very needy, he basically either wants cuddling or his belly tickling and feeding of course, the girl cat is the total opposite, she's oity toity and everything is on her terms, she is the boss which makes it all the more special when she does want you to give her attention.

Maybe its because we don't and won't be having kids but it really is ridiculous how much we care for them and how much part of the family they are, and I think cats can be the smartest and yet the stupidist animals all at the same time!

I love cats me :-)

Just to add Pedigree cats can be a fucking nightmare with illnesses, we had all manner of issues when they were kittens, they are fine now but we had all manner of shit related incidents when they were young, turns out theyve got IBS, cats with IBS!! So it took us a while to find the best food for them

[ToneLa]

Flouncer, your cat story is very similar to the story of almost every cat that has entered my life. They simply chose to meet me and then come and live with me, acting like such perfect creatures you'd think they had special training in how to be effortlessly loving companions.

Meanwhile, the real owners are going spare.....!

Joking, but. Cats ain't loyal. There's two in my road I feed who come into my gaff and nuzzle my ankles til I give in, say "Well, asthma, you can fuck me over for a bit" and stroke them. One's a white and brown tabby thing, one's a small sleek black kitten.

I gush because I love them. Being their second-owner is lots of fun. All affection, no dead mice! The little sluts.

[steve98]

[/quote ]


I like your free-floating shelves, are they still up? Have you had to add brackets? Be honest now.



I fucked this post up

[Twed]

Meanwhile, the real owners are going spare.....!

Joking, but. Cats ain't loyal.

This has never been my experience. Cats moved in with me and stayed. They'd never leave the garden or house, even though they had a catflap and could fuck off for extra attention and treats with a neighbour at any time. I'm sure some cats would leave, but you're generalising.