Beautiful Car Parks

[ToneLa]

Quite partial to the Morrisons supermarket car park in Ellesmere Port.



It is quite eloquently designed - clear lines, no bizarre archicture apart from the frankly strange main supermarket itself with an off clock; bring a watch. You merely drive in on the left which is no issue if you have been driving sober originally, and there is the main car park. Or head straight on and you have a little area on the right mainly reserved for the disableds but also parents and children. I myself take full advantage of this, bringing my father occasionally, enjoying the sweet liberation of being able to park in front of a cash machine where you are not charged extra! I mean, the amount you choose comes out the account obviously. My father doesn't mind because he doesn't fully understand and it's his card anyway



Best of all you do not have to pay! I do feel self-conscious using this car park without charge to such a large extent, so whenever I see a trolley boy (they are always boys, or simple men at least), I walk over - locking my car en route, as us car owners are wont to do - and call him over, pressing a fifty pence piece into his palm, and pulling his fingers tightly shut with mine. A quid if he's black, though I won't do the pressing shut thing. It's none of your business if this gives me an erection.

Upon egress you can do a left should you need to insert petroleum into your Peugeot or coffee into yourself. And if you get the two mixed up: the station attendant changes daily, and is usually a woman, so there's no point worrying about what they might think anyway. There's also air for your tyres but not sure how it works

Indeed, not to brag, but one can clearly spot that this car park has a range of extraneous benefits. LOOK:



A competitive price will often greet you, although that's a photograph, not a realtime webcam feed. I am absolutely indebted to the Timpson's, what with my shoe emergencies, though when nearby I usually pop in for the fresh fish - as the sign indicates, on a daily basis. Why?? Fresh fish, "mate". Never tried the wifi, got my own at home.

And let's not literally beat around the literal bush here - open skies are a rarity in England. Those rolling clouds! I'd give it a good rating just for those, assuming I could also stop my car legally in an available bay without further hassle.

I don't use the supermarket itself, just the car park. Try to get in and out whenever possible.

Travellers, you see.



Final Car Park Rating: Full revved.


So, gentle reader, what car parks do you especially find gorgeous in all their pomposity?

[ToneLa]

Is this thread a swing and a miss?

Not fucking likely, I've seen loads of car parks!

[Sebastian Cobb]

rip trinity square

[ToneLa]

rip trinity square

A sun (car park) that set (closed) too soon (not literally although 10pm surely wasn't too much to ask).

[Head Gardener]

the Tescos in Northampton

[Paul Calf]

rip trinity square

Are you a Snottinghammer?

[Dr Trouser]

Are you a Snottinghammer?

We all are in our own way.

(Gedling, mapperley and sneinton represent)

[ToneLa]

Look at THIS beauty in Mold! Now THIS is a car park!

[PlanktonSideburns]

Is this thread a swing and a miss?

Not fucking likely, I've seen loads of car parks!

What you have here is a perfect thread, bottle episode, no side orders needed

[ToneLa]

The Liverpool One car park is too, too rich for my blood

HOW I HUNGER FOR OPEN SKIES

[Brian Freeze]

If it's open skies you are after then hop on the tram to Sainsbobs in Oldham.

You can see the moors (not always on fire), church spires,  a mosque and the gallery (not yet on fire) and also the fire brigade training centre (frequently on fire) from the comfort of the elevated parking arena.

Photos available upon request.

[Sebastian Cobb]

The Liverpool One car park is too, too rich for my blood

HOW I HUNGER FOR OPEN SKIES

Bet it doesn't look like that in person when there's nobody around to colour grade all the lights at the left.

[ToneLa]

If it's open skies you are after then hop on the tram to Sainsbobs in Oldham.

You can see the moors (not always on fire), church spires,  a mosque and the gallery (not yet on fire) and also the fire brigade training centre (frequently on fire) from the comfort of the elevated parking arena.

Photos available upon request.

Consider this a request!

[ToneLa]

Bet it doesn't look like that in person when there's nobody around to colour grade all the lights at the left.

It never looks that empty either, but I reckon this pic has been Photoshopped to enhance the natural glamour, or, and this is a wee bit unethical to me, even add in car park features that the car park does not possess.

The car park beauty pageant industry is rife with such cheating. You look at candid pics online, and you can kid yourself for a bit. You order the catalogue and it's the same. It's a wee bit uncanny, but these are some fetching car parks. You're so hungry for bare, revealing car park material your very desire will fool you, even when they touch themselves up. But then you go to an event in person, and yes, the car parks up there on the catwalk are gorgeous, comely, if strangely attired, but just you can't shake the feeling that the initial deceit has poisoned your opinion of the car park forever.

I'm quite traditional at heart. Tarmac. A few disabled spaces. Not too many, obviously. Outside. If you can't see the stars in the car park at 3AM I am fundamentally not interested as that's weird.

[buzby]

An short-lived local celebrity i'm sure you are familiar with Tone

[ToneLa]

Before the pics loaded I was hoping to see Purple Aki but alas no, it is the rotten.com version of car park porn! :(

[Sebastian Cobb]

I'd be alright with seeing Purple Aki in an underground car park because I'm built like a gypsies dog.

[ToneLa]

He's been seen this year already at a tram stop, which I find disappointing on a number of levels...

https://www.dailystar.co.uk/news/latest-news/754063/purple-aki-manchester-town-centre-bicep-Akinwale-Arobieke-liverpool

[Sebastian Cobb]

lol I'm on another forum that has a thread that updates whenever he crops up. I'm sure being on the receiving end of his business is fucking terrifying but he also seems to be a true mythological bogeyman in the North West, hence why someone threw themselves under a train to avoid him.

He also looks quite good for his age.

[ToneLa]

Haha. Legend Aki. He is aging like the finest of wines - albeit a wine that fuckin grips you in a car park, la

Which is my favourite kind of wine incidentally.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Chateau 1985 - Grabs you like Purple Aki - Oz Clarke.

[ToneLa]

Got absolutely slashed on Aki wine last night

... Better than being popped...

[ToneLa]

Heartbreaking photo...

[Head Gardener]

in Exeter city centre





it's got beautiful stairwells but the only drawback is nearby there are... TANKS!

[ToneLa]

Typical bloody Exeter, can't drive anywhere without having to watch for tanks.

[buzby]

in Exeter city centre

Classic anti-shooting up UV light, there. Not seen so much in metropolitan areas these days.

[Sebastian Cobb]

When I worked in the bookies the manager asked for one of those lights for the bogs and was denied because it's pretty easy to trace your veins before going in, in a shop full of biros.

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

Erm....Stephen Foster considers rewrite ? Madonna considers rewrite ?

[Brian Freeze]

Consider this a request!

Hope its worth the wait.



Couldnt get the church spire in I'm afraid. Or the massive boot on the roundabout.

[ToneLa]

Hooray!

Look at greedy Mother Nature greedily trying to take our eyes from the concrete! No, no; ignore the clouds, the true beauty there is on the ground. You can even make out the parking spaces...


A lovely, exciting contribution, juxtaposting the best of man's cost-effective architecture with whorish old Earth's tedious grasping for attention