Author Topic: Alan Partridge haikus  (Read 619 times)

Fambo Number Mive

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Alan Partridge haikus
« on: February 28, 2019, 02:44:15 PM »
Ah-Ha, the host shouts
Glen Ponder raises his arms
What's the band called, Glen?

http://www.haikusyllablecounter.com/ might help people like me who struggle with haikus

Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #1 on: February 28, 2019, 03:06:09 PM »
U switch to HD
Look at Lynne
More like Lynne
Ramsay

ToneLa

  • Kill your masters
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #2 on: February 28, 2019, 04:12:18 PM »
Go round to see Michael
What's the living arrangement
Sausage in a cup

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #3 on: February 28, 2019, 04:17:51 PM »
He lifts up his top
My face is on his stomach
The others have left


PlanktonSideburns

  • Our love can destroy this whole fucking world
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #4 on: February 28, 2019, 04:22:36 PM »
Not as good as when
I had a full head of hair
NEVER SPEAK TO ME

Cuellar

  • Push off my wire
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #5 on: February 28, 2019, 04:22:43 PM »
My peep hole Pringle
Is modeled on an SA
S balaclava

ToneLa

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Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #6 on: February 28, 2019, 04:49:09 PM »
Someone shouts a swear
Online rips it a new one
No Rule of Funny

ToneLa

  • Kill your masters
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #7 on: February 28, 2019, 04:51:13 PM »
Driving to Dundee
Pulped my book. Needless to say
I had the last laugh

ToneLa

  • Kill your masters
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #8 on: February 28, 2019, 04:52:42 PM »
Dan Dan Dan, Dan DAN
Dan Dan Dan Dan, DAN DAN DAN!
They're sex people Lynne.

BeardFaceMan

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Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #9 on: February 28, 2019, 04:55:30 PM »
No second series?
Who..oo.ooo.whooo.oo.oo.whooooo
Do you think you are?

ToneLa

  • Kill your masters
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #10 on: February 28, 2019, 04:55:54 PM »
Best of the Beatles
Nothing to do with Pete Best
Although that still works

ToneLa

  • Kill your masters
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #11 on: February 28, 2019, 04:56:50 PM »
Evil genius
Who lives in underground base
Also Dr. No

BeardFaceMan

  • Safely ensconced on top of the bathroom cabinet
    • mixes'n'mashes
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #12 on: February 28, 2019, 04:57:33 PM »
This makes little sense
It completely ruins things
"Partridge, you wanker!"

ToneLa

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Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #13 on: February 28, 2019, 05:00:55 PM »
Worth of boast worlds
Funnier the third time round
Big in the back time

ToneLa

  • Kill your masters
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #14 on: February 28, 2019, 05:02:33 PM »
Alan's ladyboy
Fetish causes mass debate
On this very board

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #15 on: February 28, 2019, 06:43:47 PM »
It's time for Sportsdesk
Chris looks at me and then I
Forget my next words

Alan's big pocket
What will be in it this week?
Nothing suitable

Captain Z

  • Oh yeah my cholesterol's going down
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #16 on: February 28, 2019, 07:50:09 PM »
Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan
Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan
Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, DAN

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #17 on: March 01, 2019, 05:11:52 AM »
I’ve got a fat back
You wouldn’t want to see me
In my underpants

petrilTanaka

  • Are we counting shites?
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #18 on: March 01, 2019, 02:46:32 PM »
always on about
Benjamin Netanyahu
you'll never meet him

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #19 on: March 01, 2019, 07:36:28 PM »
Time for some bonking
What's this now? Chocolate? NO!
Here's taxi money!


Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #20 on: March 01, 2019, 07:37:07 PM »
Dundee cake mashed up
Half a pound in the toilet
It flushes first time

ToneLa

  • Kill your masters
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #21 on: March 01, 2019, 07:50:32 PM »
I'm some twat online
What's with the mannerisms?
Alien Partridge

Cuellar

  • Push off my wire
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #22 on: March 01, 2019, 07:54:31 PM »
Giant chickens in
A shed. How did they get so
Big? Moo-oo-oo-oo

petrilTanaka

  • Are we counting shites?
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #23 on: March 01, 2019, 08:54:53 PM »
ex-snooker player
is an unknown quantity;
not under a cow

ToneLa

  • Kill your masters
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #24 on: March 01, 2019, 08:59:35 PM »
You you're sacked you are
Because you have nervous twitch
You did it again!

touchingcloth

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  • She is hot in the arse.
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #25 on: March 01, 2019, 09:27:47 PM »
A big-eared farmboy
Feeding burgers to his swans.
Cows fall, water breaks.

Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #26 on: March 02, 2019, 02:27:04 AM »
Psychic Simon how you forget
to save messages
like u'r Mike Leigh's nuts
in may
bird it

PlanktonSideburns

  • Our love can destroy this whole fucking world
Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #27 on: March 02, 2019, 10:42:31 PM »
Why must they change things?
Alan would never do this!
The one show? Like this?!

Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #28 on: March 02, 2019, 10:58:24 PM »
rover eight hundred
has been daubed with grafitti
cock, piss and partridge

Re: Alan Partridge haikus
« Reply #29 on: March 05, 2019, 08:17:54 PM »

Man fall out of the bleachers
what kind of comedy is it
slapstick he could
be hurt