Author Topic: £5 for a wank pass from April  (Read 4289 times)

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #90 on: March 10, 2019, 06:56:43 PM »
Porn is a massive waste of time, spunk and mind power, I for one am glad it is all being destroyed.

Yes it’s great, but due to be destroyed in the next wave are your time, spunk and mind power.

biggytitbo

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #91 on: March 11, 2019, 07:03:11 AM »
Amazing how little discussion this is getting, I'm guessing most people just don't know about it so are in for a shock on April fools day. I guess the size of the backlash will be a measure of how comfortable people are to admitting to using porn.

thenoise

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #92 on: March 11, 2019, 07:43:13 AM »
No worries I'll just spy on European exchange students sunbathing topless on the beach.

oh wait the government banned them too!!1

Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #93 on: March 11, 2019, 08:13:07 AM »
I’m at peace with it - I watch to much porn if I’m being honest, it’s just too easy to nip on pornhub or whatever and if it’s going to be a pain in the arse now I can fuck it off I reckon, pardon the pun

biggytitbo

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #94 on: March 11, 2019, 08:31:57 AM »
It's low hanging fruit though isn't it (itself a highly recommended porn vid), this is the first step to government/corporate control over the whole internet.

shiftwork2

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #95 on: March 11, 2019, 08:47:22 AM »
Imagine if there was no porno available and some bloke in a pub offered you the whole lot forever for a fiver.   You’d be up there like a rat up a drainpipe you dirty bollocks!

Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #96 on: March 11, 2019, 01:07:39 PM »
I'm a sadist so I'm blue-balling for when this happens and I can rub a massive one off over everyone losing their porn

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #97 on: March 11, 2019, 01:11:55 PM »
Can someone precis what I need to do to continue wanking to pornography unabated after this change?

Is it just "switch on VPN then return to manhandling own penis"?

Cuellar

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #98 on: March 11, 2019, 01:12:53 PM »
I imagine so, yes.

Blumf

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #99 on: March 11, 2019, 01:25:02 PM »
I'm a sadist so I'm blue-balling for when this happens and I can rub a massive one off over everyone losing their porn

Get back to sorting out that Brexit mess Theresa!

biggytitbo

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #100 on: March 11, 2019, 01:31:02 PM »
Are we the first western country to introduce a wanking licence?

Cuellar

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #101 on: March 11, 2019, 02:08:36 PM »
Don't know if you need to pay for a card thingy, but apparently ageID are already operating in Germany.

Wet Blanket

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #102 on: March 11, 2019, 02:24:18 PM »
Didn't Germany have a thing where you couldn't buy ordinary Hollywood films that have their equivalent of an 18 certificate without ID, and this was a massive bollocks for online retailers?

Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #103 on: March 11, 2019, 02:27:52 PM »
I mean I remember Germany made Carmageddon have green blood in it, not sure if they did the same with cum in pornos

thenoise

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #104 on: March 11, 2019, 02:29:30 PM »
Are we the first western country to introduce a wanking licence?

About time we introduced a sex licence too, I'm absolutely fed up with young people today having sex all over the place with gay abandon.

biggytitbo

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #105 on: March 11, 2019, 02:32:26 PM »
I mean I remember Germany made Carmageddon have green blood in it, not sure if they did the same with cum in pornos


Only the Incredible Hulk porn sub-genre.

H-O-W-L

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #106 on: March 11, 2019, 02:51:17 PM »
About time we introduced a sex licence too, I'm absolutely fed up with young people today having sex all over the place with gay abandon.

I bet you are, you dirty old bollocks. Don't be such a homophone.

gilbertharding

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #107 on: March 11, 2019, 05:13:17 PM »
Imagine if there was no porno available and some bloke in a pub offered you the whole lot forever for a fiver and the strongly implied threat that at any point in the future the same bloke could 'accidentally' tell the whole world including everyone you know that you are a wanker.

*balls shrivel*

gilbertharding

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #108 on: March 11, 2019, 05:16:13 PM »
I mean, I shouldn't really worry. I've had a bloody good run - some would say I was in my prime during the Golden Age of Onanism... but at my age I reckon I only had a few more years of self-abuse in me anyway.

Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #109 on: March 11, 2019, 06:57:31 PM »
What's a good vpn now then? The thing I found in the past was it would slow things down, which would surely cause a problem when streaming?

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #110 on: March 12, 2019, 02:07:41 AM »
Why don’t I buy 1,000 of them from tesco, then sell them on individually for 10 quid a pop.

My USP? I don’t keep any records. They’ll trace back to me, so you can watch as much filth as you want and you won’t be found on The List when it inevitably leaks.

I’d like 500k for 10% of my business.

*cut to Evan Davis*

Young entrepreneur Ferris has come up with an innovative way to anonymize the nation’s grot, but as massive wankers themselves, will his aggressive pitch to their industry anger the Dragons?

alan nagsworth

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #111 on: March 14, 2019, 05:56:15 PM »
The rain mans of this world with their encyclopaedic knowledge of every porn they've ever seen are going to be the real winners after all this.

Personally though I'll be reverting to the good old "spank bank", picturing myself hate-fucking every woman who's ever crossed me, which is every woman. Can't wait to blow the cobwebs off that little gold mine.

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #112 on: March 14, 2019, 06:30:02 PM »
In a new survey commissioned for the BBC Three series Porn Laid Bare, 50% were in favour of the porn ban. The BBC article has a button with "PORN" on a computer, as if you could just find porn by pressing a button on the keyboard. Total scaremongering. The front page link to the article has an app named "PORN".

https://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/article/bb79a2ce-0de4-4965-98f0-9ebbcfcc2a60

thenoise

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Re: £5 for a wank pass from April
« Reply #113 on: March 14, 2019, 07:06:20 PM »
Yeah - totally unrealistic.  It should be in a folder labelled 'homework'.  on a desktop computer in 1998.