Author Topic: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'  (Read 1364 times)

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Aids-tier mentality


Rizla

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #1 on: March 13, 2019, 08:08:13 PM »
what if the wind is really biting

Captain Z

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #2 on: March 13, 2019, 08:51:38 PM »
I'm not going out there, some of that air has come from Africa.

Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #3 on: March 13, 2019, 09:03:46 PM »
It's fucking cold. are you having a shit at me? are you doing a shit? fucking hell how hard is this to understand. its COLD DICKFACE.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #4 on: March 13, 2019, 09:04:20 PM »
It's fucking cold. are you having a shit at me? are you doing a shit? fucking hell how hard is this to understand. its COLD DICKFACE.

It's not cool to be aids-tier

Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #5 on: March 13, 2019, 09:23:36 PM »
oh look at me im a perv who loves farts la dee dah

Angrew Lloyg Wegger

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #6 on: March 16, 2019, 09:09:29 AM »
I'm in Liverpool and it is windy and rainy. But I will be out and about all day because I am a stone cold solid hard bastard.

(Disclaimer: Actuslly I will be spending it mostly in museums)

Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #7 on: March 16, 2019, 09:48:12 AM »
But it would mess up my hair!

Oh...

yeah...

Sorry mate.

Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #8 on: March 16, 2019, 10:43:58 AM »
What if you were born with a massive surface area? 
Or a very high centre of gravity?
What if you were hollow?

Shoulders?-Stomach!

  • You Go Careful There Now My Love
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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #9 on: March 16, 2019, 10:46:22 AM »
What if you were born with a massive surface area? 
Or a very high centre of gravity?
What if you were hollow?

Diddums mate - kids in Africa

Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #10 on: March 16, 2019, 11:01:07 AM »
Hey fuck you, I don’t need your sympathy, I’m just not going to leave the house if it means spending the next hour being wafted up and down the high street, while all the high-density twats laugh and point and film me on their mobiles.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #11 on: March 16, 2019, 11:18:05 AM »
John in Gabon is 8D - where is his multi-dimensional shoulder to atomise on?

Replies From View

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #12 on: March 16, 2019, 11:36:50 AM »
oh look at me im a perv who loves farts la dee dah

OOOOOH AN HOOOP

Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #13 on: March 16, 2019, 12:07:02 PM »
I can get behind this. Cold is fine, rain is fine, snow is fine.

Wind is NOT fine. Its as if God/the Gods is/are farting biting cold air directly at your face.

biggytitbo

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #14 on: March 16, 2019, 12:23:17 PM »
You're always striding on the pavements by Bridgewater Place though, and you can easily get blown off down there.

alan nagsworth

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #15 on: March 16, 2019, 12:24:57 PM »
Ever been 16 and tried rolling a joint with your mates down the skate park in this weather? Yeah, you’d stay indoors too. Except you can’t. All sorts of stuff preventing that. Parents. The smell of it. The dog who keeps scratching at the bedroom door for a cheeky wheeze. So it’s off out in the elements and tap your weed out into the rizla and watch the lot blast off into the half-pipe.

Now I’m 32 and I can sit indoors and watch the wind rip the living fuck out of next doors fence while I listen to John Zorn’s highly underrated easy jazz album O’o and honk on a fat one. Just try and tell me that’s not living.

Rizla

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #16 on: March 16, 2019, 12:29:07 PM »
Ever been 16 and tried rolling a joint with your mates down the skate park in this weather? Yeah, you’d stay indoors too. Except you can’t. All sorts of stuff preventing that. Parents. The smell of it. The dog who keeps scratching at the bedroom door for a cheeky wheeze. So it’s off out in the elements and tap your weed out into the rizla and watch the lot blast off into the half-pipe.

Now I’m 32 and I can sit indoors and watch the wind rip the living fuck out of next doors fence while I listen to John Zorn’s highly underrated easy jazz album O’o and honk on a fat one. Just try and tell me that’s not living.

Once, at a bus stop in Dundee, I watched a quite old man skinning up in the biting wind and rain, using his asthma inhaler as a weight to keep the skins from blowing away. 9/10 would watch again

ToneLa

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #17 on: March 16, 2019, 12:34:08 PM »
Me and Ed skin up in phoneboxes.

Me 35, him 40

That said, for all other purposes, wind is funny!

biggytitbo

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #18 on: March 16, 2019, 12:35:02 PM »
Wind is the worst thing when you're in the early stages of going bald as you're still in total denial at that point and spend hours creating elaborate combing strategies to hide it, which can traumatically be totally embarrassingly exposed by one devastating gust of wind.

Malcy

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #19 on: March 16, 2019, 12:38:14 PM »
Woke up and was delighted to hear no wind. Looked outside and it had been replaced with snow which due to the now torrential rain has caused huge amounts of slush and flooding.

Fuck sake.

alan nagsworth

  • Hi. I'm in Delaware.
Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #20 on: March 16, 2019, 12:39:17 PM »
Wind is the worst thing when you're in the early stages of going bald as you're still in total denial at that point and spend hours creating elaborate combing strategies to hide it, which can traumatically be totally embarrassingly exposed by one devastating gust of wind.

My hair is extremely wispy and no amount of product seems to hold it in the place I like it (i.e. strategically cut and styled to cover the fact that it's receding up either side of the fringe area) and recently I've taken to wearing a hat on windy days. Fuckin standing on a platform waiting for the tube and the cunt hurtles in and trashes everything. I think it would a lot less damaging on any relative scale if I just jumped out in front of the blasted thing. My hair would probably not look any worse afterwards either.

pancreas

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #21 on: March 16, 2019, 12:42:36 PM »
I quite like being blown.

BlodwynPig

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #22 on: March 16, 2019, 12:45:55 PM »
Woke up and was delighted to hear no wind. Looked outside and it had been replaced with snow which due to the now torrential rain has caused huge amounts of slush and flooding.

Fuck sake.

Weather, eh? I bet you’d like to see it perish

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #23 on: March 16, 2019, 01:03:18 PM »
Wind is the worst thing when you're in the early stages of going bald as you're still in total denial at that point and spend hours creating elaborate combing strategies to hide it, which can traumatically be totally embarrassingly exposed by one devastating gust of wind.

But when the baldness exposure gust is being produced from the crouched winnowed buttock crevice of a veteran rectum-for-hire from Pontefract, the situation becomes even more stark to all present.

Malcy

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #24 on: March 16, 2019, 01:06:56 PM »
Weather, eh? I bet you’d like to see it perish

I would have taken 3 feet of snow rather than mush.

Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #25 on: March 16, 2019, 01:22:55 PM »
John Zorn’s highly underrated easy jazz album O’o

I hadn't heard this one before but I'm checking it out now and really enjoying it. It's very much the same sound as his first album as The Dreamers which I loved.

alan nagsworth

  • Hi. I'm in Delaware.
Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #26 on: March 16, 2019, 01:33:50 PM »
I hadn't heard this one before but I'm checking it out now and really enjoying it. It's very much the same sound as his first album as The Dreamers which I loved.

I believe it's actually part of the same trilogy of albums which also includes The Gift, all performed with the same band. It's a gorgeous album. Wait till you hear Laughing Owl, one of the happiest songs I've ever heard. Makes me want to stroll down the street handing flowers to everyone I see. Just not in this wind, obviously.

Spoon of Ploff

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #27 on: March 16, 2019, 01:34:33 PM »
went out. almost got hit by a random piece of polystyrene that was being flung about by clumps of agitated air molecules. it could have taken someone's eye out. who knows maybe it still will.
you have to think these things through.

ToneLa

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #28 on: March 16, 2019, 02:01:08 PM »
Might take a box out, catch a bit of wind in it and bring it home later as a pet. A wee bit of wind aboot the hoose!

Spoon of Ploff

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Re: Being fully mobile yet refusing to go out because it's 'too windy'
« Reply #29 on: March 16, 2019, 02:17:05 PM »
Might take a box out, catch a bit of wind in it and bring it home later as a pet. A wee bit of wind aboot the hoose!

We could all chip in... Then on calm days we could release the wind to keep the turbines going. But what of the ethics of keeping wind in captivity? Trapped wind can be a terrible thing.