Fastest Way to lose 1 stone (does not have to be medically sound)

[BlodwynPig]

*Fattest Weight to Lose 1 Stone*

[Danger Man]

Remember the five-step "IM FAT" program

Also the MEL C system


More Exercise Less Cake

[bgmnts]

Yeah, that's how all weight loss diets work.

There is a better way.

[ToneLa]

Smack.

[thenoise]

Yeah, that's how why all weight loss diets don't work.

[pigamus]

Don't eat after six o'clock. Very hard to stick to, especially at first, but it makes a hell of a difference.

[imitationleather]

Why does the OP want to lose a stone fast? I'm guessing they're a boxer and fancy dropping down to a lower weight class.

[Twed]

There's an upcoming weight-based cull. Please pay attention to current affairs, we can't keep you informed as a fucking service.

[Sebastian Cobb]

They say booze is fattening, but if you go on a multi-day bender without food you'll probably loose weight.

[imitationleather]

They say booze is fattening, but most chronic alcoholics have the skin and bones build that supermodels would kill children for.

[Twed]

They say you only hear what you want to. You don't listen hard, don't pay attention to the distance that you're running to anyone, anywhere

[José]

sugar free haribo and the ensuing death shits.

[hummingofevil]

Don't eat bread or booze. That literally should just about do it.

I can't find a link to it but Steve Bunce talked about how Lennox Lewis would basically fuck off to the NJ hills after a fight a live in luxury. When he was ready to start training he would do the following:

10 x 10 mile walks
5 x 5 mile runs

---

I've still not go round to the runs but the walking I did and was great. Actually probably put ON weight but felt strong and was great preparation for starting a proper get fit regime.

Also don't worry about weight. I can lose or gain over half a stone in a day quite easily. Spend the day drinking plenty of water and eat a big early dinner then weigh yourself. Then spend the evening drinking gin and slims and weigh yourself after your morning shit but before eating or drinking anything. Easily half a stone through dehydration.

The 5:2 /6:1 diet is quite good and I occasionally have a 'clear liquids' day if I think I've eaten to much which is basically as much coffee, apple juice, jelly, broth and boiled sweets you can eat in a day. Don't do it more than once a month and never for more than a day. Just a nice reset button.

[paruses]

Why does the OP want to lose a stone fast? I'm guessing they're a boxer and fancy dropping down to a lower weight class.

I am a jockey. I needed this information by 3:45 yesterday afternoon. Should have put in the opening post.

[thraxx]

I occasionally have a 'clear liquids' day if I think I've eaten to much which is basically as much coffee, apple juice, jelly, broth and boiled sweets you can eat in a day. Don't do it more than once a month and never for more than a day. Just a nice reset button.

A great bit of accidental Partridge. It was the word 'broth' that swung it.

[paruses]

Don't eat bread or booze. That literally should just about do it.

I can't find a link to it but Steve Bunce talked about how Lennox Lewis would basically fuck off to the NJ hills after a fight a live in luxury. When he was ready to start training he would do the following:

10 x 10 mile walks
5 x 5 mile runs

---
[..]

The 5:2 /6:1 diet is quite good and I occasionally have a 'clear liquids' day if I think I've eaten to much which is basically as much coffee, apple juice, jelly, broth and boiled sweets you can eat in a day. Don't do it more than once a month and never for more than a day. Just a nice reset button.

What's the consensus on porridge? I am eating a bowl of porridge  now (made with water and no honey or anything to make it taste nice so assume it is OK).

The reason for wanting to drop this is just a kick start so I can build on it - I posted above that I have willpower but no patience and the two sort of cancel each other out after a while. I did lose a fair bit last year and got into some yoga and felt pretty good but then because I travel around a lot for work it all went to pot.

Is there a website / app that will plot routes of different lengths around cities? I am happy to walk and walk of an evening but have no idea how much distance I cover.

There should be. Anyone want to come in with me building one?

[Sin Agog]

All you need to do is think thin.  If you think thin, you will become thin.  Especially if you think thin while rowing down the Amazon on a swelteringly humid July.

[Blinder Data]

Just to echo this - after my wife said she wanted to separate in the middle of February I lost 3kg in as many weeks.

(she's changed her mind btw)

Ah, gutted for you mate - you must have looked dead sexy during those three weeks

[idunnosomename]

just adding another voice to the woefully underrepresented "remove a limb" camp

[Paul Calf]

EDIT: beaten to this idea ^

There is a better way.

A better way than using more calories than you consume?

Surgery?

[Noodle Lizard]

Lose the carbs.  Meat only.  Or meat and some low-carb vegetables.  As much as you like.  You can quite easily lose a stone in a matter of weeks doing that, and you won't feel terrible except for a possible constipation in the first few days.

Not something I fancy pursuing full-time, but it's a good reset diet for me if I need to lose a few.  You tend to be a bit more careful reintroducing stuff afterwards as well.  Eating a McDonald's after a couple of months of this genuinely felt like eating poison, but you can get back there if you want.

[bgmnts]

EDIT: beaten to this idea ^

A better way than using more calories than you consume?

Surgery?

Prayer.

[Cuellar]

joke about Mike Skinner considers rewrite

[Alfigator]

I dropped about 2 stone very quickly on the Dukan diet. It's not medically sound but it was a great kick start and has left me on the right track.

Basically eat nothing but protein for 4 days in unlimited quantities. After the 4 days pure protein, alternate between days where you eat protein and vegetables and days where you just eat protein for a couple of weeks. Worked for me as there is a list of pre-approved foods which you can have unlimited amounts of so you never have to go hungry.

Dukan. It works.

[paruses]

I dropped about 2 stone very quickly on the Dukan diet. It's not medically sound but it was a great kick start and has left me on the right track.

Basically eat nothing but protein for 4 days in unlimited quantities. After the 4 days pure protein, alternate between days where you eat protein and vegetables and days where you just eat protein for a couple of weeks. Worked for me as there is a list of pre-approved foods which you can have unlimited amounts of so you never have to go hungry.

Dukan. It works.

Exactly the kind of madness I want. I did the Atkins diet several years ago and then kept the weight off as I liked being lighter.

Can I ask how long you did the Dukan thing for?

[pancreas]

Of course, you could always just take some DNP.

It uncouples the proton pump in your cells which means all the energy whizzes round without doing any work. So you just get hot instead. Technically, I think it counts as cellular poison, and several people have died from a fatal fever after taking too much. For that reason you can only get it on the dark web.

But it means you don't have to do 'getting fit', which sounds dreadfully earnest and extremely boring to me. I'm not sure I could be friends with a person who likes 'getting fit'. I would sex them, of course, but that's a different matter.

I hasten to add I have decided just to get a little fat, rather than take capsules of cellular poison every day.

[Buelligan]

I don't buy shit food.  Only eat when I'm hungry, stop when I'm not hungry.  I think about the food in my mouth, eating it, how it is, don't just shovel it in whilst I'm doing something else, trying to swallow the mouthful I have so's I can put another in.  Never eat because it's a treat and I'm not actually hungry, because I deserve it, never eat because it's a shame to waste it, never eat because I'm sad/bored (being fat and sad/bored is still being sad/bored). 

If I'm honest, for me, it's like a feeling of turning the mind outward - towards life, activity, future, movement - not inward - my pain, my tiredness, my isolation, hopelessness.  That probably doesn't make much sense but that's how the emotions feel to me.

Don't drink, obvs, lots of walking and other exercise (which makes me feel more and more fucking powerful, quite frightening really).

[paruses]

DNP

I am up for anything that was used extensively in Diet Pills from 1933 to 1938. Sounds like a ride.

[Alfigator]

Exactly the kind of madness I want. I did the Atkins diet several years ago and then kept the weight off as I liked being lighter.

Can I ask how long you did the Dukan thing for?

I did about 2 weeks alternating between pure protein and protein and vegetable days and then 6 weeks eating protein and vegetables. After eating so much protein for a couple of weeks, the rest of it is a breeze. The restrictive list of foods is pretty good as it resets your thinking, after a while you lose all cravings for processed foods you only seem to reach for the healthy option.

[thecuriousorange]

I can't recommend swimming enough.