Avoiding massive rows with your Mum as you get older

[Buelligan]

Yep.  There's some good selections down at the high street retailer, MotherShare.

Yours looks like she needs a rebore anyway, they'll never take her.

[dallasman]

Trap her in one of those nets they have now.

[ZoyzaSorris]

Luckily she's dead!

[Small Man Big Horse]

Start making up things she supposedly said and she'll worry that she's starting to get dementia, and will spend all of her time stressing about that rather than picking on you. It's what I did and though I felt a bit guilty after her suicide I'm fine now, and quite looking forward to the funeral on Friday.

[shiftwork2]

Luckily she's dead!

Yes, I can vouch for this being a total win.  Haven't had any arguments for years.

[ComedyUnitInsider]

This was after me very innocently saying that I was trying to save as much money as possible from my relatively new job (in the UK, having moved back out of necessity) because I hadn't worked in over a year (on account of waiting for that fucking permit) and needed savings.

Why did you mention this to her? It's none of her business, is it?

Bringing up something like that makes it seem like you want her advice. Even I'm yearning to give you some uncalled for advice about your life - like asking you what you were playing at taking a year off work for no good reason, etc. It's instinctual.

Establish boundaries.

[Nowhere Man]

Why did you mention this to her? It's none of her business, is it?

Bringing up something like that makes it seem like you want her advice. Even I'm yearning to give you some uncalled for advice about your life - like asking you what you were playing at taking a year off work for no good reason, etc. It's instinctual.

Establish boundaries.

Aye, fair enough. I agree with you there. I was waiting for a work permit after getting married as my wife was living over in America then i joined her over there for the wedding and during the last year. Of course it took a longer waiting period than I ever could have imagined, and drained my savings in the interim.

Me and me Mam are cool now, but obviously what with me coming back it think I just need a bit of space from her whilst I readjust a bit

[petril]

have a relaunch for her

[Paul Calf]

[tag]She doesn't like avoiding my COLUMN![/tag]

I solved this problem by not being such an irritable, angry, argumentative cunt. YMMV.

[Blue Jam]

I left home at 19 and was 23 when my mother died, and I now realise that I had gone "limited contact" with her for the four years of living away from her, before I even knew that was a thing and that it had a name. I basically visited home as little as I could get away with and never phoned her, instead waiting for her to phone me (when she would inevitably demand to know "Why haven't you called?" before starting an argument and then accusing me of starting it before slamming the phone down on me). I just found her manipulative behaviour and unwinnable mind games too draining to bother with.

Limited contact, no contact and death are all good solutions.

[Cuellar]

Only speak to her when asking for money/absolution

[Blue Jam]

Serious answer: "Grey-rocking" is meant to work well:

https://www.thriveafterabuse.com/going-gray-rock/

Just pretend to be boring as fuck, like Steve Davis.

[WesterlyWinds]

Have you considered leaving the country so as not to have to speak to her anymore?

[Alfigator]

She's probably right , you should have worked harder. Why couldn't you work for a year ? Waiting for a permit stopped you from working for a year ? How's that work. Your mums a legend

[pancreas]

Have you considered leaving the country so as not to have to speak to her anymore?

Is that what you did? Welcome back by the way, I thought you were dead.

[Dex Sawash]

Have you considered leaving the country so as not to have to speak to her anymore?

ww!

[DistressedArea]

Hi, my Mum's just read the model railway thread and she says she's going to report you and you'll all be put on a register.

Sorry, I just really, really wanted to go to Cambridge.

[Better Midlands]

I left home at 19 and was 23 when my mother died

Once I was 20 years old, my story got told
I was writing 'bout everything,
I saw before me
Once I was 20 years old

[Pancake]

I had a serene relationship with my mum, tensions frayed towards the end of my teens, then I became an adult and we had a chummy relationship, then she retired and I became a family man and now she's irritating me again

[Pancake]

I feel I should caveat this by saying I'm being facetious and she's an absolute doll really, as all parents should be.

Mrs Cake has a loving but distant relationship with her dad, and I am 90% certain he's lived (and is living) with undiagnosed depression.

[GMTV]

Early stages of dementia tend to up the argument count.

[Pancake]

There's also an entire generation of people our parents age who were taught that being emotionally expressive was a bad thing, and seeking help for mental health issues was stigmatised, so it's all leaking out now and they're being wankers to their upwardly mobile, unrepressed kids

[Dex Sawash]

Serious answer: "Grey-rocking" is meant to work well:

https://www.thriveafterabuse.com/going-gray-rock/

Just pretend to be boring as fuck, like Steve Davis.

I do this to everyone, didn't know it had a name.

[thenoise]

Did you know that you can get paid to browse CAB all day?  It's true, just ring up your local temp agency (or better yet visit in person) and ask for office admin roles.  You get your own cushty cubicle in a nice warm office in town, just churn out the odd letter and make the odd phone call and 5 hours plus of the working day is yours.  If you're anything like me you'll soon exhaust CAB and move on to other forums too, you'll be prolific as 'titbo on a dozen different fora, should you so wish, or you can just sit back and enjoy the show.

Warning: you may wake up one day the wrong side of thirty, single, depressed and have no career prospects.