Author Topic: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood  (Read 1330 times)

St_Eddie

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The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« on: April 09, 2019, 08:13:53 PM »
The new Addams Family animated movie (starring Oscar Isaac as Gomez Addams and Charlize Theron as Morticia Addams).

I couldn't really give a toss about the movie itself (which looks like hot garbage) but the trailer really annoyed me...


* "This is an average American family".  Fine for the first two examples (a white nuclear family and a black nuclear family) but then they also show us further examples, by way of a family with two gay dads and another with two gay moms.  How is that "an average American family"?  Naturally, they also made sure to chuck in every mixed race family that they could think.  Oh, and also a couple without kids.  How the fuck does that last one even constitute as a "family"?!

So desperate are the PR team to be inclusive and woke, as they went about ticking off their corporately orientated demographic mandate, that they screwed up the entire meaning of "an AVERAGE American family", therefore muddling the message that they're trying to convey in their trailer.  Even putting that aside, all that they needed was the first family (the white nuclear family).  Everything else is diluting the pace of the trailer and extraneous to the point that they're making.

* Oh look, it's a reference to It.  That's popular with audiences at the moment, what with the success of Chapter 1 and Chapter 2 looming on the horizon.  There's no real joke there, it's just a reference to something which is part of the popular culture zeitgeist.  "I clapped when I saw it!"

* The constant stop-start nature of the music.  MUSIC>JOKE/LOUD NOISE>STOP MUSIC>PUNCHLINE>RE-START MUSIC.  I hate it when trailers do this.  It's the modern equivalent of the record scratch and this trailer has several of the bloody things.
« Last Edit: April 09, 2019, 08:35:47 PM by St_Eddie »

Shit Good Nose

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #1 on: April 09, 2019, 09:20:56 PM »
I can't remember the last genuinely decent trailer I saw - might've been one of the early teasers for AVP (that introduced the "whoever wins, we lose" tagline) - but what does my tits in is how fucking long some trailers are.  I remember seeing one for the Pete's Dragon remake when I took Little Nose to the cinema a year or two ago, and it was about three minutes long.  And I seem to remember one of the Harry Potter films (or perhaps it was one of the Hobbits) had one that was a shade under five minutes.  Fucking ridiculous.

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #2 on: April 09, 2019, 09:25:15 PM »
Does anyone miss the voice?  The trailer narration?  I think it stopped in the mid-2000s and has been replaced by title-cards and musical stings, as well as including half the film’s actual dialogue.

I can’t say I miss it, as such, but it did make trailers more entertaining.

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #3 on: April 09, 2019, 09:29:50 PM »
"In a world... where trailers are too long..."

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #4 on: April 09, 2019, 09:35:02 PM »
Does anyone miss the voice?  The trailer narration?  I think it stopped in the mid-2000s and has been replaced by title-cards and musical stings, as well as including half the film’s actual dialogue.

I can’t say I miss it, as such, but it did make trailers more entertaining.
No doubt it would ruin my CAB Comedy Cred, if I had any, I did enjoy the joke that I heard, I think, Lenny Henry doing (but is probably much used before that) about the voiceover guy talking like that in all situations of his private life, such as while in bed with the missus.

"I'm coming... soon".

Shit Good Nose

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2019, 09:37:20 PM »
Does anyone miss the voice?  The trailer narration?  I think it stopped in the mid-2000s and has been replaced by title-cards and musical stings, as well as including half the film’s actual dialogue.

I can’t say I miss it, as such, but it did make trailers more entertaining.

Probably because the voicemen (yer Don Lafontaines, Ken Nordines and Hal Douglas' and the like) were starting to earn enormous sums of money - towards the end of his career Lafontaine was getting paid more per minute than most A-list Hollywood actors, and with trailers getting longer...

St_Eddie

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #6 on: April 09, 2019, 09:45:24 PM »
One of the many things that I hate about modern trailers is when you're watching them online, you get that preview of the preview, where there will be a selection of highlights from the trailer that you're about to watch, to encourage casual viewers to continue watching.  See also; teaser trailers.  A trailer for the trailer.  Ridiculous.

I also hate the way that most trailers these days give you the entire plot, condensed down into 3-4 minutes, sometimes going as far as to include the ending shot from the movie (as was the case with the trailer for The Amazing Spider-Man 2).

Shit Good Nose

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #7 on: April 09, 2019, 09:54:53 PM »
I also hate the way that most trailers these days give you the entire plot, condensed down into 3-4 minutes, sometimes going as far as to include the ending shot from the movie (as was the case with the trailer for The Amazing Spider-Man 2).

Yeah, that does suck ass - more and more I find myself saying "well, I don't need to see that". 

Also cf. the increasing regularity of spoilers in trailers.  Spoilers have never bothered me in the least (I've always been far more interested in the how they got to the end, rather than the end itself), but I totally get why it drives most people up the wall, and it does seem an absolutely braindead thing to do.


One good thing about trailers, and it is more the case with modern trailers, is that tantalising glimpses of stuff that ends up on the cutting room floor.  One of the VERY VERY early teasers for Blade Runner 2049 featured a short glimpse of Mackenzie Davis in character as Mariette, running along a beach at night naked holding a light purple/dark pink flare, and a still from that scene was Tweeted during production (the scene, or at least what was in the trailer and the still lifted from it, was a long shot, so Davis' modesty remained reasonably intact).  That scene and that still now nowhere to be seen and appear to have completely disappeared from the internet.

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #8 on: April 09, 2019, 10:54:29 PM »
The worst thing about that Addams Family trailer is that the first gag is a fucking "It" reference.  It's not even a clever gag.

Wednesday's carrying a red balloon.  "What's that?", "I don't know", "Huh! There's usually a murderous clown attached to these!"

Dull, pandering shite.  They know their audience is going to be stunted 20-somethings.  The animation looks crap, an' all, like one of those shorts you'd see before an IMAX movie in the early 2000s. 

From the minds who brought you Sausage Party.

mothman

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #9 on: April 09, 2019, 11:13:25 PM »

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #10 on: April 10, 2019, 12:15:22 AM »
I can't remember the last genuinely decent trailer I saw - might've been one of the early teasers for AVP (that introduced the "whoever wins, we lose" tagline) - but what does my tits in is how fucking long some trailers are.  I remember seeing one for the Pete's Dragon remake when I took Little Nose to the cinema a year or two ago, and it was about three minutes long.  And I seem to remember one of the Harry Potter films (or perhaps it was one of the Hobbits) had one that was a shade under five minutes.  Fucking ridiculous.

I'd say increasingly the problem you have is that trailers seem to be put together by marketing people far removed from the actual production and all look to follow the same kind of cues regardless of whether it actually suits the film in question.

Part of Marvel's success I would say is that whoever does there trailers seems rather more inline with the films intent, stuff like Ragnarok or the original Guardians of the Galaxy I think stand out as films were a lot of the hype came from the trailer as a very effective preview of the films styles.

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #11 on: April 10, 2019, 12:28:18 AM »
Yeah modern trailers are utter piss for the most part. I hate the fact that some horror trailers have things in there that aren't in the actual film. Some of the paranormal activity films were particularly guilty of this. Witches and mad people jumping out of wardrobes and none of it's in the film.

The entire plot being outlined is also entirely stupid.

It's kind of like how they produce modern music to sound loud on smartphones, iPads and shitty bluetooth speakers but in the process they've messed up all the nuisance and magic.

BlodwynPig

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #12 on: April 10, 2019, 01:15:46 AM »
No doubt it would ruin my CAB Comedy Cred, if I had any, I did enjoy the joke that I heard, I think, Lenny Henry doing (but is probably much used before that) about the voiceover guy talking like that in all situations of his private life, such as while in bed with the missus.

"I'm coming... soon".

Monkey Dust?

BlodwynPig

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #13 on: April 10, 2019, 01:19:14 AM »
When the trailer becomes the main event everyone is squeegeeing about in anticipation

"yo, the trailer for Bungle Kills Again has JUST DROPPED"

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #14 on: April 10, 2019, 03:20:30 AM »
The worst thing about that Addams Family trailer is that the first gag is a fucking "It" reference.  It's not even a clever gag.

Wednesday's carrying a red balloon.  "What's that?", "I don't know", "Huh! There's usually a murderous clown attached to these!"

Dull, pandering shite.  They know their audience is going to be stunted 20-somethings.  The animation looks crap, an' all, like one of those shorts you'd see before an IMAX movie in the early 2000s. 

From the minds who brought you Sausage Party.

The character design is some of the most soulless crap I'v seen in a 3D animated film as well this side of some terrible UK effort like the Magic Roundabout, they could have at least gotten GP studios involved to add some Lynchian dread.

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #15 on: April 10, 2019, 05:15:22 AM »
That trailer looks like a PS2 game FMV in tone alone.

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #16 on: April 10, 2019, 08:09:21 AM »
It’s also over-animated in the way so many sub-par CGI animations are these days, with characters perpetually moving in some way on every syllable - very much like a video game cutscene.

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #17 on: April 10, 2019, 08:54:34 AM »
I'll offer a slight defence; I think the character designs are decently evocative of the original New York Times cartoons. I agree it's not very funny and I can't help thinking they should have made it in stop-motion, but I'm open to seeing what further trailers reveal.

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #18 on: April 10, 2019, 10:10:40 AM »
I'll offer a slight defence; I think the character designs are decently evocative of the original New York Times cartoons. I agree it's not very funny and I can't help thinking they should have made it in stop-motion

Something closely resembling the original cartoons would have been magical. Especially if it were stop-motion - that would have been ideal for the subject matter! And a billion times less cost-effective...

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #19 on: April 10, 2019, 01:08:13 PM »
BWAARRRRRRRRRM

Brundle-Fly

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #20 on: April 10, 2019, 02:37:24 PM »
The character design is some of the most soulless crap I'v seen in a 3D animated film as well this side of some terrible UK effort like the Magic Roundabout, they could have at least gotten GP studios involved to add some Lynchian dread.

Wednesday Addams looks like a teaspoon. Frightful design.

St_Eddie

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #21 on: April 10, 2019, 03:10:55 PM »
BWAARRRRRRRRRM

Urgh.  That and the digital white noise thing; ACTION BEAT>FFFRRRRAHHHHHAAARRRRHHHHHHHHHHH.  Kind of hard to describe, so hopefully people will know what I'm referring to.

Wednesday Addams looks like a teaspoon. Frightful design.

"What a frightful design!"

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #22 on: April 10, 2019, 03:26:00 PM »
When did that actually start to dominate trailers? I mean Spielberg's War of the Worlds popularised the foghorn like noise but did the trailers work like that?

I actually think part of the problem Hollywood has in promoting anything outside of a few big franchises is how bad its become at making trailers to sell them. Something like say Blade Runner 2049 or Ghost in the Shell, unless you knew those properties well(and neither are close to say Starwars, Marvel, Heir Potter, etc) you'd have a hard time working out what the fuck was going on.

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #23 on: April 10, 2019, 04:15:58 PM »
When did that actually start to dominate trailers? I mean Spielberg's War of the Worlds popularised the foghorn like noise but did the trailers work like that?

Inception in 2010 is the earliest example that I remember:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hP9D6kZseM

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #24 on: April 10, 2019, 05:41:30 PM »
Inception didn't invent them (it's essentially just a brass section playing really low, of course) but it really did single-handedly popularise them in trailers.

Dr Syntax Head

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #25 on: April 10, 2019, 09:52:55 PM »
Wasn't it the Zimmer Brahm as it was known? Inception was the first and apparently done with a load of brass being played into an open piano or something

Edit
https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/braaams-beginners-how-a-horn-793220

I once recreated a zimmer braaam in Logic for a laugh. I called it (hehe) Zimmer Frame

Dr Syntax Head

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #26 on: April 10, 2019, 09:58:47 PM »
Copied from my post in film cliche thread.

That descending in pitch sub bass sound that stops abruptly to silence and then BLAM! EXPLOSION and the name of the film. You know what I mean. It's lazy as all fuckery.
« Last Edit: April 10, 2019, 10:47:24 PM by Dr Syntax Head »

St_Eddie

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #27 on: April 11, 2019, 12:47:30 AM »
Wasn't it the Zimmer Brahm as it was known?

Ah, yes.  Zimmer Brahm, Brother to Johnny Fffrrrrahhhhhaaarrrrhhhhhhhhhhhh-digital-noise-bullshit.  A scourge upon Hollywood, the pair of them.

Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #28 on: April 11, 2019, 01:23:34 PM »
Copied from my post in film cliche thread.

That descending in pitch sub bass sound that stops abruptly to silence and then BLAM! EXPLOSION and the name of the film. You know what I mean. It's lazy as all fuckery.

"Risers", I believe.

The BOOMs etc when THIS SUMMER appears are "slams".

Just watched the new crappy "live-action" Lion King trailer and trailer editing is just so ridiculously manipulative, but it's so effective you can see why essentially every tent-pole trailer will be done to the exact same way.

kalowski

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Re: The Terrible Trailers of Modern Hollywood
« Reply #29 on: April 11, 2019, 04:15:06 PM »
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