big adventure

[kittens]

lads i have booked easter week off and i am going to have an adventure. so far i have decided to cycle to stonehenge from bristol. where else can i go to. i'm going to take my tent and camp in the woods - will i get in trouble for this? any words of advice for my big adventure are gratefully received.

[Norton Canes]

so far i have decided to cycle to stonehenge from bristol

And what are you going to do for the rest of the afternoon?

[Norton Canes]

Reckon you could handle taking it up Cheddar Gorge?

[Twit 2]

Camping in the woods seems like fun until you realise that foxexbadgersrapists will get you. It's really hard to camp outdoors as invariably you're on someone else's land or it's public but banned. Stonehenge is a soulless touris-trap monument to bleakness, too.

[kittens]

And what are you going to do for the rest of the afternoon?

this is merely leg one of my centipede-like journey (hundred legs). just don't know where to go from there. and no i been to cheddar gorge was o.k. did a piss off the side.

[Twit 2]

I suggest you leave Bristol with nothing but your boots and walk to Paris. Sleep under bridges and in barns, write an elliptical account of it.

[idunnosomename]

you have to pay to get in stonehenge.

[Spoon of Ploff]

Best to stay at home and watch telly.

[momatt]

You should try to jump over Stonehenge on your bike.
That'd be so rad.

[kittens]

Camping in the woods seems like fun until you realise that foxexbadgersrapists will get you. It's really hard to camp outdoors as invariably you're on someone else's land or it's public but banned. Stonehenge is a soulless touris-trap monument to bleakness, too.

surely the farmer isn't always prowling his woods. surely i can stay for a night and it won't be a problem. and actually being chased by a farmer is exactly the kind of thing i want to happen on my adventure so this is good news.

[Twit 2]

you have to pay to get in stonehenge.

Indeed. When I went it was free as I'm a member of EH - if I'd had to pay for that experience I would have been fucking livid. The worst tourist attraction in the UK.

surely the farmer isn't always prowling his woods. surely i can stay for a night and it won't be a problem. and actually being chased by a farmer is exactly the kind of thing i want to happen on my adventure so this is good news.

What if I'm the farmer?

[kittens]

i'd pay anything to see those big fucken rocks

[Twit 2]

Look at them from over the fence for free.

[kittens]

oh yes and i'll illegally download the mona lisa while i'm at it and all. if i refuse to pay £16 for a ten minute stroll around some big rocks i'm no better than thomas crown from the thomas crown affair.

[Pijlstaart]

Really suspicious about the south-west, they're an odd bunch and I'd hate to stay in any one place for long. I've read brambly hedge, there's all sorts of weird shit going on behind the scenes, and you'd never know if you were walking past a whole garrison of the fuckers. They'll stow your remains in a hollow log, to be discovered in ten years time as part of a cross-section illustration in a twee children's book. There'll be a folksy red mushroom growing out of an eye cavity and a little frog in a bonnet'll use your ribs as a bike rack for it's penny farthing and no-one will seek revenge on your behalf. Watch The Wicker Man the night before you set off, and ask yourself, is it worth it?

[poo]

what bike you got

[kittens]

normal bike

[Noonling]

Bigger adventure:

https://landsend-to-johnogroats.co.uk/planning/

[poo]

photo of bike

[Darles Chickens]

i'd pay anything to see those big fucken rocks

They're not even that big.  It's like that bit in This Is Spinal Tap, but in real life.

[kittens]

photo of bike

[Buelligan]

They used to get a bit weird about camping around Stonehenge if I remember Britain correctly.



Have you considered train with bike to somewhere (like Monmouth) and then Brecon Beacons, Wye Valley, King Arthur's Cave if the sky begins to bruise, night must fall and you are forced to camp.   

I've slept in that cave, very cold and the floor's both uneven and damp, also, something tall and silent came and stood over me, I touched it (hairy) and it ran off into the woods but you get a lovely view of the valley from the Seven Sister's Rocks, which are very nearby, down to the river, early in the morning (and you will wake early because you'll hardly sleep).  Also, wherever you camp, make sure you take a warm thing and something to eat and drink, maybe a torch, that's my advice anyway.

You have the added bonus, if you follow the Wye back, of lots of nice pubs, Tintern Abbey and arriving in Chepstow (with its castle and maybe even a railway station - this may be gone now) where, if you're knacked, you can get a train back to Bristol and safety.

[Twit 2]

Kittens, I've thought about this a lot - all day in fact, as I'm on holiday y'see - and here's what I propose you do in eight easy steps (eights look like bikes doing bike wheelies):

1. Burn your bike.
2. Be tricked into purchasing a blank book.
3. Stare at the pages until you go mad (steps 2 and 3 are the heavily summarised plot of the Ligotti short story 'Vastarien').
4. Upon release, walk to Stonehenge only to sneer at the entrance and its fee.
5. Recreate your bike from the ashes.
6. Ride this ash bike like some sort of ash demon in an ashen world.
7. Fall right the fuck off it, ungainly.
8. Return to step 1.

[The Boston Crab]

i'd pay anything to see those big fucken rocks

Hahaha

[Mr_Simnock]

Reckon you could handle taking it up Cheddar Gorge?

[Emma Raducanu]

I recently cycled through the trough of bowland and, arriving at the inn at whitewell, felt like I was on the French Riviera which had been colonised by tweed wearing Tories on horseback. It was a wonderful adventure

[Replies From View]

You could cycle within the pores of the rock itself if you aren't afraid of shrinking yourself and your bike to microscopic size.

[Cuellar]

After taking in Stonehenge, why not pootle on over to West Kennet Long Barrow, one of the oldest man-made buildings in the world.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Instant laugh

Instant joy

[ASFTSN]

(A)ttempt frottage with petrolith