Author Topic: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty  (Read 1054 times)

boki

  • Defecranium
Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« on: April 12, 2019, 03:35:01 PM »
Any suggestions on what to do about this craving?  It's (almost) FRRRRIDAAAAYNIIITE so all bets are off - I might just go a li'l crazy!

seepage

  • throwing a dog at some goblins
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #1 on: April 12, 2019, 03:35:48 PM »
Have half a pie?

Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2019, 03:36:51 PM »
Eat the pie you fat fuck

biggytitbo

  • WHAT ABOUT THE GODDAM JAFFA CAKES ASSWIPE
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Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2019, 03:37:08 PM »
Starve yourself all day then mash up a load of pies in a bucket and really treat yourself.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

  • it made more sense in my head i don't know
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #4 on: April 12, 2019, 03:39:56 PM »
Have a pasty instead you fat fuck.

king_tubby

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Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2019, 03:49:56 PM »
Gonna get some pies tomorrow. At the market.

What do you think of that, eh? EH?

Blumf

  • Not long now
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Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #6 on: April 12, 2019, 03:52:10 PM »
What kind of pie? They come in all shapes, sizes, and flavours.

Here's a pic of a Fray Bentos



If you still want a pie now, get your eyes tested.

shiftwork2

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Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #7 on: April 12, 2019, 03:56:06 PM »
(eat) pies this is your time

BlodwynPig

  • Throwing two dogs at a goblin
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #8 on: April 12, 2019, 03:56:19 PM »
Eating pie now

Eating second pie

biggytitbo

  • WHAT ABOUT THE GODDAM JAFFA CAKES ASSWIPE
    • theunredacted
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #9 on: April 12, 2019, 04:08:15 PM »

boki

  • Defecranium
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #10 on: April 12, 2019, 04:31:33 PM »
Have half a pie?

I'm not falling for that old trick [spoiler]until the next time I go the pub for a quick one[/spoiler]

Eat the pie you fat fuck
You're not supposed to be encouraging me.

Sin Agog

  • Dogs fucked the pope; no fault of mine
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #11 on: April 12, 2019, 04:33:17 PM »
Every single UKIP member has eaten a pie.

boki

  • Defecranium
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #12 on: April 12, 2019, 04:35:02 PM »
Starve yourself all day then mash up a load of pies in a bucket and really treat yourself.
Don't be silly, buckets are for fried chicken.

Have a pasty instead you fat fuck.

The Eurocrat Dictators won't let me because I'm in Leicestershire smh :(

boki

  • Defecranium
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #13 on: April 12, 2019, 04:36:46 PM »
Gonna get some pies tomorrow. At the market.

What do you think of that, eh? EH?

I think it's a great idea and I hope you enjoy your pies.

Here's a pic of a Fray Bentos

I do not recognise this as a pie.

Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #14 on: April 12, 2019, 04:40:02 PM »
Have a pie in a roll then lie to yourself that you've just had a sandwich

boki

  • Defecranium
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #15 on: April 12, 2019, 04:43:04 PM »
Every single UKIP member has eaten a pie.

This has reminded me of that time Nick Griffin tried to get a Proper British cookery show going on YouTube and he made a pie that he plonked in front of his daughter and she looked at him as if he'd shat on her favourite text message.  I don't want one of those fash pies.  Or fish pies for that matter.

boki

  • Defecranium
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #16 on: April 12, 2019, 04:43:50 PM »
Have a pie in a roll then lie to yourself that you've just had a sandwich

I made a cheese and sausage roll toastie once.  And now I'm a fatty.

Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #17 on: April 12, 2019, 04:45:01 PM »
I made a cheese and sausage roll toastie once.  And now I'm a fatty.

I used to put leftover stovies in toasties. Or leftover chilli. Or onion bhaji's.

Also, when getting in pissed after closing time and being hungry but couldn't be fucked microwaving/eating with a knife and fork I took a slice of cold congealed lasagne, whacked it between a couple of slices of bread and chomped it down.

Small Man Big Horse

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Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #18 on: April 12, 2019, 05:40:06 PM »
One of my students was called Boki today, have you by any chance become a small Chinese child? As if so you could eat that pie without any issues.

Black Ship

  • Where there is TEA, there is HOPE.
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #19 on: April 12, 2019, 06:21:20 PM »
Eat the fucking pie and go bollocks to European "standards" of beauty.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #20 on: April 12, 2019, 06:53:37 PM »
Put the pie in one of those "cobs" they have over there

Angrew Lloyg Wegger

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Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #21 on: April 12, 2019, 06:57:27 PM »
I'm in frankie and bennys having a load of meaty folded pizza, if i become a fat bloke that is acceptable collateral I think.

Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #22 on: April 12, 2019, 07:01:46 PM »
I used to put leftover stovies in toasties. Or leftover chilli. Or onion bhaji's.

Also, when getting in pissed after closing time and being hungry but couldn't be fucked microwaving/eating with a knife and fork I took a slice of cold congealed lasagne, whacked it between a couple of slices of bread and chomped it down.
Dedicated pissedness, there. How long would you have had to microwave the slice of lasagne for? A minute ?

Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #23 on: April 12, 2019, 07:03:48 PM »
What kind of pie? They come in all shapes, sizes, and flavours.

Here's a pic of a Fray Bentos



If you still want a pie now, get your eyes tested.

“Classic”.

Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #24 on: April 12, 2019, 07:49:55 PM »
I've just ate 3.14 pies. they were baked in a tin with corners. my pies are squared.

boki

  • Defecranium
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #25 on: April 12, 2019, 09:52:10 PM »
One of my students was called Boki today, have you by any chance become a small Chinese child? As if so you could eat that pie without any issues.
If I ate that little bastard would it be double-cannibalism?

Asking for a completely different, separate boki.

Small Man Big Horse

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Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #26 on: April 12, 2019, 10:21:51 PM »
If I ate that little bastard would it be double-cannibalism?

Asking for a completely different, separate boki.

Nah, I checked and it's completely legal as long as you don't eat the skin and crawl inside it afterwards.

Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #27 on: April 12, 2019, 10:41:08 PM »
I don't like pork piers because of the jelly.

I cannot countenance steak and kidney pie.

Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #28 on: April 12, 2019, 10:47:06 PM »
If you warm up the pork pie, the jelly disappears. And the pie tastes eighty seven times better for it.

Mr_Simnock

  • BREXIT? what brexit
Re: Really want a pie but I'm a fatty
« Reply #29 on: April 12, 2019, 10:57:19 PM »
Have your pie and enjoy it