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March 28, 2024, 05:57:06 PM

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Accidentally cycled through a private road

Started by Stoneage Dinosaurs, April 13, 2019, 04:19:27 PM

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Stoneage Dinosaurs

With one of those 'trespassers will be prosecuted' signs and a cctv thingy.

Am I going to The Jail? If so, what do I do in there thanks

greenman

Tattoo the same message to your lower back hoping that making fun of male sexual assault will make you popular "on the inside".

Ignorance is no excuse in the eye of the Law. Your goin down.

For Life!

pancreas

I would knife you myself if I were in the same country.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

They are now allowed down your road, or, if you haven't got a road, tract.

Definitely jail. And not white-collar jail, either. It will be a long spell in Strangeways for you. Every day will be a headbutt and/or shiv jousting contest with your fellow trespassers. Until you have all learned your lesson.

This is what your future looks like:



And it serves you right.

Shoulders?-Stomach!



You cannot see any rape in that gif. Could just be horseplay, or general boisterousness.


Goldentony

I meant in general now that you've sauntered down a farmer or torys private road then in general thats your arse, something awaits you be it monetary or in hell where you are now destined, I didn't mean in conjunction with the gif of The Hulk getting burst

shiftwork2

You get into a lot of scrapes on your bike.  Have you considered getting roller skates

Replies From View


thenoise

Quote from: Default to the negative on April 13, 2019, 05:15:17 PM

A bit horrible, that.

Although bicycles don't have licence plates, CCTV can identify any bike from the reams of CCTV data they already have of you.  Especially as your riding style is, according to the official files on the subject, 'characteristic'.  Not to worry, though, you will have at least 48 hours before they process the information and send the police round to bang on your door.  I suggest you use the time wisely.

Glebe


Shit Good Nose

Often wondered how these work - an aunt and uncle of mine live on a private road in a private estate (although the entrance to the estate is not manned or gated like you see in films) and there are signs everywhere saying about trespassers being shot on sight etc (exaggeration for effect) but not once in my lifetime of going there (in my cars, and prior to that my parents' cars, with number plates on full display) have I ever had a fine or the 5-0 turning up at my door at 3 in the morning to arrest me for trespassing.

Methinks the signs are just there for show...

BlodwynPig

I just ignore these things. Unless im in a man made structure i tell the land owner to sling their hook and 12 bore shotgun - fuckwits

Bazooka

Top tip on the inside, wear some newspapers/magazines under your shirt, as shank armour.

BlodwynPig

Or just carry a bunch of daily mails and shout Papers!

Icehaven

My heart for now is a private road
No thoroughfare, no heavy load
No slow traffic, no graphic details,
Cold or collisions
No more stories to make me ache
I'll always love you venus
Still you are mine
Why'd you have to take so much time
In calling me
Just want to be easy like
Sunday morning
Snow falls in silence and covers the green
Still you can see where the birds have been
Hungry but alive and free, waiting
Waiting