Danny Baker. #CANCELLED.

[DrGreggles]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Travis_(chimpanzee)

That's the chimpanzee that tore the woman's face off.

I love chimps, they're tremendous fun. Very much the Father Larry Duff of the animal kingdom.
However, they can (and do) lash out when they don't like or want to do something.
Almost as if they're able to show displeasure...

[Twed]

Just as anybody who submits to their rapist is loving it really.


Are you trying to get disqualified for jury duty by demonstrating a complete inability to empathise or something?

[Sebastian Cobb]

What's the stance on giving a chimp a pullover and if they put it on, they've put it on?

I reckon through emulation and curiosity this is at least feasible.

[Twed]

Sebastian, a chimp does not need to wear a pullover to deglove DrGreggles. A smock would be more suitable for splatter protection.

[Zetetic]

Almost as if they're able to show displeasure...

Perhaps that's why "Jo Mendi" wasn't given treatment when he'd reached about 10 years of age.

I wonder what the training regime was like until they let him die.

[DrGreggles]

I feel like we're getting closer and closer to being granted permission to dress up DrGreggles all fancy like, which is my end goal here.

And, if I don't tear your face off in a Travis stylee*, it's fair to assume that I'm fine with it!


*which I dare say would be the most entertaining Travis tribute act possible

[Twed]

Are you just sticking to your guns on this because you're stubborn or do you really think that if people/animals don't lash out violently when something happens to them that they like it?

You're making such a singular point, I'm not worried about other people thinking this way too and having to defend against it, I'm simply fascinated that you might genuinely think these things.

[DrGreggles]

Just as anybody who submits to their rapist is loving it really.

Yes, that's what I said!

Only if it's a chimp though, obviously.

[NoSleep]

Travis - The Chimp Who

Anthropomorphisation?

[phantom_power]

Have I missed something? Did Baker travel back in time to commit this act of animal cruelty? Or did he just find a picture on the internet?

[DrGreggles]

Are you just sticking to your guns on this because you're stubborn or do you really think that if people/animals don't lash out violently when something happens to them that they like it?

You're making such a singular point, I'm not worried about other people thinking this way too and having to defend against it, I'm simply fascinated that you might genuinely think these things.

I'm sticking to my guns because I don't think putting a top hat on a chimp represents any form of animal abuse.
The rest of you can continue to make ridiculous comparisons to rape or slavery or whatever the next one is (probably Brexit knowing this place), but you can do that without me.

I'm off to put a balaclava on my pet tortoise...

[NoSleep]

I love chimps, they're tremendous fun. Very much the Father Larry Duff of the animal kingdom.
However, they can (and do) lash out when they don't like or want to do something.
Almost as if they're able to show displeasure...

Except they are terrifyingly strong in comparison to their weight due to the density of their muscle tissue. As I said, they are not a domesticated animal, therefore dangerous.

[chveik]

how did we get to this point

forum debate lads

[phantom_power]

Except they are terrifyingly strong in comparison to their weight due to the density of their muscle tissue. As I said, they are not a domesticated animal, therefore dangerous.

So anyone who dares put a coat and hat on them deserves a fucking medal

[NoSleep]

A Darwin Award?

[Zetetic]

So anyone who dares put a coat and hat on them deserves a fucking medal

I believe the trick is to get a young one and beat the shit out of it.

Do they like this? We just can't know.

[Sin Agog]

Have I missed something? Did Baker travel back in time to commit this act of animal cruelty? Or did he just find a picture on the internet?

It was F. Scott Fitzgerald and his wife (the other human) in the picture, wasn't it?  All the great American novelists engaged in mild primate abuse to tempt the muses.  You really don't want to know the kinds of things Steinbeck got up to with his pet bonobo when he was having trouble finishing up a chapter.

[St_Eddie]

I love chimps, they're tremendous fun. Very much the Father Larry Duff of the animal kingdom.
However, they can (and do) lash out when they don't like or want to do something.
Almost as if they're able to show displeasure...

Conditioned subservience is a thing, you absolute kumquat.

Also, please explain why it's a good thing to put a watermelon on a cat's head?  I genuinely want to hear your reasoning on this.

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

I think we can all agree that Danny Baker himself would, even under his current circumstances, really enjoy the absurd tangents this thread has taken. It's like a particularly freewheeling edition of one of his radio shows.

[Twed]

It's good to talk, Bob Hoskins said so. I find it really irritating when somebody sees a conversation they think is pointless and decide that their contribution should be repeatedly saying how stupid it is, as if curiosity is something inherently offensive.

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

Sigh. That's not what I'm saying, I find this thread quite entertaining. Maddening at times, yes, but you can't fault its wayward energy.

[Monsieur Verdoux]

yeah i like the fact that it's turned into one of those mad threads, it's much better than the whole thing devolving into a politics thing or something

[Twed]

Sigh. That's not what I'm saying, I find this thread quite entertaining. Maddening at times, yes, but you can't fault its wayward energy.

I didn't mean you specifically, sorry. Feel free to imagine I wrote something that was more a celebration of following tangents, which would have been better.

[Poisson Du Jour]

CaB, in before the momentum as always, has of course a long history of decrying animal abuse in media content online. I remember the thread like it was two weeks ago, you couldn't swing a cat for people condemning Danny Brooker's use of animal images in his twitter farts. The man has history.

I don't think I've ever posted an image of an animal - can you say the same? If you have, start writing those sincere and in-no-way-excusing-what-I-did apologies.

Twed cancelled

[Twed]

The dog is literally not aware of the cake

The reaction is edited in

(I'm talking about this video specifically, I'm sure others are different but despite what I've just said about tangents I am not prepared to go down the rabbit hole of 'does a dog think a cake that looks like a dog being cut is actually a dog being cut' because the answer is 'you fucking idiot of course not do you understand anything? FFS. The dog isn't even in the same country as the cake most likely, what do you think this is? Dog action at a distance? Are we really discussing quantum doggery now? I HATE YOU')

[Ballad of Ballard Berkley]

I didn't mean you specifically, sorry. Feel free to imagine I wrote something that was more a celebration of following tangents, which would have been better.

No worries, I got the wrong end of the stick.

[Buelligan]

I believe the trick is to get a young one and beat the shit out of it.

Do they like this? We just can't know.

I think you have to kill its mother first.

[Danger Man]

yeah i like the fact that it's turned into one of those mad threads,

It's all theatre.

[Monsieur Verdoux]

of course it is, did you think something of consequence was going to happen here

[solidified gruel merchant]

Sticks sometimes have three ends, don't they? Like a wishbone.