Author Topic: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)  (Read 5291 times)

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #60 on: May 12, 2019, 01:09:15 AM »
I think you said earlier you wouldn't wish death on him. Why? I do. I hope he dies in absolutely staggering pain, or if not that is permanently blinded and/or disfigured. You can wish it all you want. If it happens it won't be because you wished it.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #61 on: May 12, 2019, 01:12:55 AM »
I think you said earlier you wouldn't wish death on him. Why? I do. I hope he dies in absolutely staggering pain, or if not that is permanently blinded and/or disfigured. You can wish it all you want. If it happens it won't be because you wished it.

Woah now. He didn't say he was living with Carl Benjamin, did he?

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #62 on: May 12, 2019, 01:17:04 AM »
I just don't really understand the problem. It seems like someone who absolutely deserves to be beaten bloody until they can't even cry. I don't see how that's somehow a bridge too far given that they obviously deserve it.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #63 on: May 12, 2019, 01:19:18 AM »
I hope you'll be able to move as soon as possible SMBH, the whole situation sounds hellish.


Stop trying to crutch shame smbh

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #64 on: May 12, 2019, 03:55:10 AM »
The landlord got back to me, she spoke to him and has sided with him, saying the noise I made was unreasonable despite not having witnessed it at all. And she didn't comment about the fact that he called me a fat fuck or any of the other offensive nonsense.

Fucking hell.  Absolutely ridiculous.  I'm so sorry, Small Man Big Horse.  You don't deserve this bullshit.  I think that you mentioned that you have a girlfriend, right?  If so, that's a good thing because at least you don't have to suffer alone; you've got someone to vent with.  Still doesn't mean that you should have to put up with this nonsense, of course.  You have my sympathies.  You're a good person and deserve better than this.  Things will improve in time, if that's any consolation.

I shouldn't be surprised, a month after we moved in there were two people living in the building who stopped paying rent and she sent them text messages threatening to throw acid in their faces.

What a lovely, charming lady she is.  Seriously, fuck her.  God forbid that someone should chuck acid in her stupid face.  Somehow I don't think that she'd see the funny side then.  I'm seriously considering killing myself.  I don't think that I can take this anymore.  Is this what people are like?  I'm wavering as it is but this is pushing me further into the realms of suicide.  Fuck people.  Fuck life.

Having said that, it's not about me and I'm certainly no example of what one should follow.  It's about you and I hope that you can resolve this horrible situation in due course.  You've said that you're looking towards moving out in a few months time.  I would recommend keeping that in mind.  Look towards the future and try to keep your mind away from the present, as best you can.  You will be a good person always.  He will be a horrible person always.  You will be a good person in a better home by the end of this year.  He will be a horrible person in a home and nobody will ever love him because he's not capable of love himself.  Look towards the future, my friend.  This little runt is of no consequence.
« Last Edit: May 12, 2019, 04:22:45 AM by St_Eddie »

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #65 on: May 12, 2019, 04:08:42 AM »
Fuck it if landcunt isn't arsed then dob him into the po po.

Also Eddie wtf?

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #66 on: May 12, 2019, 04:12:31 AM »
Sounds to me like the landlord might know the shitty tenant and isn't letting on. You can imagine the situation "Oh, you can rent my place!" and how this would embolden him and make her defend him.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #67 on: May 12, 2019, 04:58:14 AM »
Also Eddie wtf?

Eh, I'm just speaking from the heart.  I wouldn't care to direct this thread towards my own personal demons.  In hindsight, I probably shouldn't have said anything.  I think that it's more important that we focus on Small Man Big Horse's issues, being that it's the topic of the thread and also that nobody should have to put up with the bullshit that he's currently facing.  My own personal problems are small potatoes by comparison.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #68 on: May 12, 2019, 08:47:45 AM »
Sounds to me like the landlord might know the shitty tenant and isn't letting on. You can imagine the situation "Oh, you can rent my place!" and how this would embolden him and make her defend him.

Payment in kind. In the communal shower. It's the only explanation. Unless the housing shortage is so severe that losing most of their tenants is no longer an issue to landlords.

Sorry to hear you're in this situation, SMBH. The man is clearly a cunt. I don't have much in the way of advice but you could try contacting the council about the noise and start keeping a noise diary. You could put the threatening behaviour in the diary too.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #69 on: May 12, 2019, 08:56:44 AM »
And yes, have a dictaphone...

Why can't he use his finger like everyone else?

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #70 on: May 12, 2019, 09:09:10 AM »
You could put the threatening behaviour in the diary too.

Also, your inner most thoughts and feelings.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #71 on: May 12, 2019, 10:03:26 AM »
Also, your inner most thoughts and feelings.

Hmm. I was being serious. A noise diary is exactly what the council's Environmental Health department would require in order to take action. Including the threatening behaviour would highlight the seriousness of the situation.

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #72 on: May 12, 2019, 10:18:25 AM »
I'm on the fence. Not sure about all those kids learning english, knowledge is power, and power corrupts. I reckon we should stop for a generation or two, no english, take a breather and see what they do, and then we start speaking english again. It'll be for our own good as well as theirs.

He needs sorting out though. Make him fall in love with you and then spurn him. Maybe do one of those bumprint handstands, leave a bumprint on him. Hide gobbets of your shit in his coat pockets. Flop a bazong into his mouth each morning while he sleeps until he's reverse-weaned onto you, then when he's addicted you only let him suckle when he's behaving.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #73 on: May 12, 2019, 10:36:07 AM »
The fact people are moving out over this tit makes her siding with him all the more baffling.

She was enamoured with him from the get go, going on and on about how handsome he was before he moved in. The irony is that he's gay and so she's not his type, but I'm not sure she actually knows that.

Wow - you should mention this to the police and say not only do you feel intimidated by a potentially violent housemate but your landlord is now encouraging it.

If we weren't planning on moving I would, but I don't want to risk escalating things any further, at least right now. But as others have suggested I'm keeping a diary of his behaviour and will go to them if need be.

Fucking hell.  Absolutely ridiculous.  I'm so sorry, Small Man Big Horse.  You don't deserve this bullshit.  I think that you mentioned that you have a girlfriend, right?  If so, that's a good thing because at least you don't have to suffer alone; you've got someone to vent with.  Still doesn't mean that you should have to put up with this nonsense, of course.  You have my sympathies.  You're a good person and deserve better than this.  Things will improve in time, if that's any consolation.

What a lovely, charming lady she is.  Seriously, fuck her.  God forbid that someone should chuck acid in her stupid face.  Somehow I don't think that she'd see the funny side then.  I'm seriously considering killing myself.  I don't think that I can take this anymore.  Is this what people are like?  I'm wavering as it is but this is pushing me further into the realms of suicide.  Fuck people.  Fuck life.

Having said that, it's not about me and I'm certainly no example of what one should follow.  It's about you and I hope that you can resolve this horrible situation in due course.  You've said that you're looking towards moving out in a few months time.  I would recommend keeping that in mind.  Look towards the future and try to keep your mind away from the present, as best you can.  You will be a good person always.  He will be a horrible person always.  You will be a good person in a better home by the end of this year.  He will be a horrible person in a home and nobody will ever love him because he's not capable of love himself.  Look towards the future, my friend.  This little runt is of no consequence.

Thank you Eddie, both of them are uber cunts but we'll survive them, I'm refusing to let them win and like you say he's of no consequence in the grand scheme of things and when we're free of him he'll carry on having a shitty life I have no doubt. I'm so so sorry you're in such a terrible place though, you're one of my favourite people on here and it's upsetting to hear that you're so low. Have you spoken to your GP / a professional about this? I've had to seek help on a good few occasions but it's always been something I've benefited from, and each time I found myself thinking that I just wish I'd done so earlier. And if things get really bad I'd recommend going in to hospital, it's what I did last year and it changed my life an enormous amount.

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #74 on: May 12, 2019, 10:56:38 AM »
My brain has difficulty fathoming just what an enormous cunt this guy is.
How did this worm come into existence, and why - HOW? - hasn't he killed himself yet?
I want a dossier. Detailed reports on his general day to day life, pictures, letters & emails, interviews with his closest 'friends' and family - so I can build some kind of understanding.
And the landlady. What the fuck. Have you chanced across one of those gateways to hell from Buffy?

I'm so sorry you and your partner have to deal with this pathetic fucking worm, and his cunt coconspirator.
I don't know how you didn't go apeshit when he started going on about your appearance and disability. I would have lost it.
You are so much better than him it's crazy. It's like comparing a puddle of cat piss with Everest.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #75 on: May 12, 2019, 11:07:14 AM »
Have you spoken to your GP / a professional about this? I've had to seek help on a good few occasions but it's always been something I've benefited from, and each time I found myself thinking that I just wish I'd done so earlier. And if things get really bad I'd recommend going in to hospital, it's what I did last year and it changed my life an enormous amount.

As I mentioned earlier, my GP recently retired (the same GP whom I've had since I was five years old).  I've yet to meet my new GP but I'm not looking forward to it.  My past GP knew my history and was a thoroughly decent bloke.  Hopefully, this new GP will be cool but who knows?  Whatever the case, thank you for your advice.  I've taken it onboard.

My brain has difficulty fathoming just what an enormous cunt this guy is.
How did this worm come into existence, and why - HOW? - hasn't he killed himself yet?

You see, you have this little thing called a conscious.  That's a good thing.  Jiminy Cricket sits upon your shoulder and nudges you in the right direction.  However, not all people are decent like yourself.  Some folk are bereft of a conscious.  The only crickets that they have, are the ones chirping and echoing within their numbskull head.  Morons, the lot of them.  The world would be a better place without the likes of these bastards.  I'm not afraid to say that THEY DESERVE TO FUCKING DIE.  Fuck pussy footing around.  Fuck these arseholes.  They only exist to cause pain and suffering to others.  Not every human life is precious.  Fuck that shit.  There are literal chickens who have more of a right to life than these motherfuckers.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #76 on: May 12, 2019, 11:13:40 AM »
You see, you have this little thing called a conscious.

Conscience.



He's got his eye on you, pal.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #77 on: May 12, 2019, 11:27:22 AM »

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #78 on: May 12, 2019, 11:37:39 AM »
In light of these scathing comments I would like to reflect that I don't think anyone actually deserves to die. I mean, imagine wishing someone was dead, and then it happened. Would that feel good? Would that feel good forever? Or alternatively would you opt for spending every quiet moment alone thinking about how you might have killed someone with your mind, and even if that's not directly the case, you were still instrumental in stripping a physical husk of its human soul and revelling in that fact. Not cool.

SMBH, I sincerely hope this situation is resolved soon. I don't have anything to add (except my HILARIOUS WHIMSY) but I know how much of a kind, lovely person you are, and you deserve a better living situation than this. Despite the awful nature of your housemate and landlord, your comments here are admirably resilient and that in itself is a testament to your own strength. Keep fighting the good fight, my man.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #79 on: May 12, 2019, 11:47:05 AM »
Shit in this guy's bed. If you can't gain access to his bed, shit in your bed but imagine that it's his bed, then find him while you're all covered in shit and say "I have shat my bed but I imagined it was your bed" and see where he goes from that.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #80 on: May 12, 2019, 11:58:07 AM »
...imagine wishing someone was dead, and then it happened. Would that feel good?

Yes.

Would that feel good forever?

Absolutely.

Not cool.

Very cool.  I'm wanking already.

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #81 on: May 12, 2019, 03:48:05 PM »
I'd get out of London quick for a kick off, and then i'd selectromagnetically seal a room up with a stereo inside blasting Blue Monday on an infinite loop until the cunt has to nut the wall through to stop it and injures himself horribly in the process. It sounds like an unwinnable situation for you and i'd honestly just keep an eye on getting the fuck out as fast as possible. If I think about going to the council or the housing ssociation in London all I can see in my mind is the fucking spider's lair from IT with really hot steam blasting out at you from the wall that takes about 3 hours to walk down before you get to a pine door with a frosted glass window and a reel of tickets next to it with the words PROPER FUCKED LTD etched onto the glass.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #82 on: May 12, 2019, 05:06:11 PM »
As I mentioned earlier, my GP recently retired (the same GP whom I've had since I was five years old).  I've yet to meet my new GP but I'm not looking forward to it.  My past GP knew my history and was a thoroughly decent bloke.  Hopefully, this new GP will be cool but who knows?  Whatever the case, thank you for your advice.  I've taken it onboard.

Ah, I'm sorry to hear that about your GP - but if your new one is rubbish just try to remember that you don't have to accept them, I've had interactions with rubbish GPs in the past and then demanded (well, politely asked) to be transferred to someone else and it's never been a problem. Are you on meds right now out of interest? I know many people have mixed views about such things but they've made an enormous amount of difference to my life, I'm currently on Paroxetine (along with Sodium Valporate) and think both are fantastic.

And if you ever want to chat, drop me a pm whenever you need too, you're honestly not alone when it comes to depression and I'll do anything I can to help.

if not that is permanently blinded and/or disfigured.

Being disfigured would be somewhat fitting given what a vain bastard he is. I had a button open on the bottom of my shirt when I spoke to him and he kept on going on and on about how disgusting my bare flesh was and how it made him feel sick, despite the fact that he regularly eats meals in the kitchen in only his pants. I did point that out but he just went on about what an amazing body he is, and how beautiful it is, whereas I'm a disgusting fat fuck. Such a lovely man, I know!

In light of these scathing comments I would like to reflect that I don't think anyone actually deserves to die. I mean, imagine wishing someone was dead, and then it happened. Would that feel good? Would that feel good forever? Or alternatively would you opt for spending every quiet moment alone thinking about how you might have killed someone with your mind, and even if that's not directly the case, you were still instrumental in stripping a physical husk of its human soul and revelling in that fact. Not cool.

I think it would actually make me feel good for a long, long time. And I'm not normally someone who thinks like that. I just wouldn't want to be in any way the cause of his demise as I know I'd go mad due to the guilt.

Quote
SMBH, I sincerely hope this situation is resolved soon. I don't have anything to add (except my HILARIOUS WHIMSY) but I know how much of a kind, lovely person you are, and you deserve a better living situation than this. Despite the awful nature of your housemate and landlord, your comments here are admirably resilient and that in itself is a testament to your own strength. Keep fighting the good fight, my man.

Aw, thank you Nags, that does mean a lot.

I'd get out of London quick for a kick off, and then i'd selectromagnetically seal a room up with a stereo inside blasting Blue Monday on an infinite loop until the cunt has to nut the wall through to stop it and injures himself horribly in the process. It sounds like an unwinnable situation for you and i'd honestly just keep an eye on getting the fuck out as fast as possible. If I think about going to the council or the housing ssociation in London all I can see in my mind is the fucking spider's lair from IT with really hot steam blasting out at you from the wall that takes about 3 hours to walk down before you get to a pine door with a frosted glass window and a reel of tickets next to it with the words PROPER FUCKED LTD etched onto the glass.

I have had a lot of thoughts about what I'd like to do on the day I move out, but for legal reasons won't mention them here!

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #83 on: May 12, 2019, 05:07:31 PM »
Bloody hell, this sounds horrendous. It sounds like you already have a plan of action and will be leaving him to fester in his own misery, but for what it's worth, could the other CAB - Citizens Advice Bureau - be worth getting in touch with? Their site has a section about discrimination in rented housing, which sounds like it could definitely apply here. I've not used their services but looked into it when my agency were being dicks a few years ago, might be some useful info here: https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/housing/discrimination-in-housing/checking-if-its-discrimination/if-someones-harassed-you-in-housing/

I'll also add to the cacophony of voices suggesting you try to record this twat if you can. I had a horrible night a couple of weeks ago (on a Tuesday night), when my upstairs neighbours - four guys who I'm guessing are about 20 - came home at midnight and were stomping around, talking loudly and shouting with their balcony window open, so I could hear everything word for word.

After a couple of hours of being unable to sleep, I went up and knocked on their flat door and asked if they could keep it down a bit as I had to work in the morning - they were a bit hostile, saying they were just talking and I couldn't expect them to not talk in their own flat. I said I understood it wasn't their fault that the sound insulation between the floors was so crappy, but it wasn't my fault either, and I had to be up at 6 regardless and didn't think it was unreasonable to ask them to keep the noise down at 2am on a weeknight. (Not saying that people with 9-5 type jobs should be treated as a priority - I haven't got a clue what they actually do, I don't think they're students but I assume they don't work during the day - but it's not like I've ever knowingly disturbed them, and ultimately if you live in the top floor of a shared building you have to be respectful of the fact that people can hear you, whatever your schedule is.)

They sort of relented, I went back to bed, but about an hour after that they'd started playing music (the same shitty techno they always play with the bass cranked up) and were banging around. I went back up and knocked again several times, loudly, and they ignored me. I left a note on their door saying I'd complain to the landlord if it carried on, and went back to bed. When I was back in my flat they'd really cranked it up and were going absolutely mental, whooping and screaming and stamping on the floor and throwing stuff, or it sounded like it anyway. This was still going on when I had to leave the flat for work at 7am.

There was no way I was getting any sleep by that point so I just calmly filmed it on my phone (showing the clock, and also my bedroom door rattling in its frame every time they hurled themselves around the room upstairs) before going to work on about 10 minutes of sleep. I sent the videos to my landlord the next day and thankfully he gave the main tenant a talking to, threatening to call the police if it happened again, and it's been blissful silence ever since. It doesn't sound like your landlady would be as accommodating sadly, but it's never bad to have some sort of evidence with a time and date stamp on it.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #84 on: May 12, 2019, 05:09:28 PM »
despite the fact that he regularly eats meals in the kitchen in his pants.

He’s got a kitchen in his pants!?


(I’m sorry - your situation is no laughing matter)

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #85 on: May 12, 2019, 05:18:09 PM »
In light of these scathing comments I would like to reflect that I don't think anyone actually deserves to die. I mean, imagine wishing someone was dead, and then it happened. Would that feel good? Would that feel good forever? Or alternatively would you opt for spending every quiet moment alone thinking about how you might have killed someone with your mind, and even if that's not directly the case, you were still instrumental in stripping a physical husk of its human soul and revelling in that fact. Not cool.

You know that nobody has the power to wish death on people, right? It's a fake idea!

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #86 on: May 12, 2019, 05:22:26 PM »
You know that nobody has the power to wish death on people, right? It's a fake idea!

It's real, man.

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Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #87 on: May 12, 2019, 05:37:10 PM »
He’s got a kitchen in his pants!?


(I’m sorry - your situation is no laughing matter)

Gah, I edited that before I saw your post but wish I hadn't now as it's a very funny image.

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #88 on: May 12, 2019, 05:38:00 PM »
Noisy neighbour


One of my ex-colleagues had recently become a father and was having trouble sleeping. The neighbours upstairs made a horrible noise and responded with abuse when he asked them to keep quiet.

So he went to their electric box and removed something. All their power went out and they didn't know what to do.
The new father knocked on their door and said that if they kept the noise down. He would fix the problem. They had no clue what he had removed, so couldn't fix it themselves. After a day he relented. The noise started up again. So he removed the part again. This time he kept it for 3 days.
They caused no more problems.

Re: Shit Housemate (Thread no. 217)
« Reply #89 on: May 12, 2019, 05:42:36 PM »
Hide his shoes.