Author Topic: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?  (Read 1272 times)

What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« on: May 12, 2019, 06:09:23 PM »
I opened my French balcony earlier, which ended up with my lounge being full of flys (dunno what they're doing up here on the fourth floor, there's loads of bins and dogshit to fill their boots with at ground level. So I shut the door and sprayed loads of bug spray about the place. Except I didn't, it turns out I'd picked up a can of GT85 instead. I can actually glide across a section of my living room floor. Smells nice though.

imitationleather

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #1 on: May 12, 2019, 06:12:26 PM »
I opened my French balcony earlier

Liar. You live in Glasgow. It's a Scottish balcony.

alan nagsworth

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #2 on: May 12, 2019, 07:16:04 PM »
Got drunk and did cocaine and was too much of a hungover ball of anxiety to attend lunch with my girlfriend's family, including her sister who is visiting from Sweden. Sigh.

BlodwynPig

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #3 on: May 12, 2019, 07:19:50 PM »
Got drunk and did cocaine and was too much of a hungover ball of anxiety to attend lunch with my girlfriend's family, including her sister who is visiting from Sweden. Sigh.



(but dressed in a salmon pink shirt)

hamfist

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #4 on: May 12, 2019, 07:20:21 PM »
Bought a skateboard. I’m 43.

Rizla

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #5 on: May 12, 2019, 07:26:53 PM »
Fed the new CaB troll.

alan nagsworth

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Twed

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #7 on: May 12, 2019, 07:38:42 PM »
Bought a skateboard. I’m 43.
That's fine, Tony Hawk is still skating at 96.

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #8 on: May 12, 2019, 08:45:06 PM »
That's fine, Tony Hawk is still skating at 96.

Genuine GUFFAW

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #9 on: May 12, 2019, 09:01:45 PM »
[...] So I shut the door and sprayed loads of bug spray about the place. Except I didn't, it turns out I'd picked up a can of GT85 instead. [...]

Liberally applied roll-on Deep Heat in place of deodorant. The intensity builds quite slowly so it wasn't until trying to order from the lovely French girl in Wall & Keogh that I looked like I was suffering from severe roid-rage and about to punch a hole in the espresso machine. I'm surprised she was willing to sell me any more caffeine to be honest.

St_Eddie

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #10 on: May 13, 2019, 01:00:59 AM »
That's fine, Tony Hawk is still skating at 96.

It's funny because it's true, or at least it will be in a few years time.

Dex Sawash

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #11 on: May 13, 2019, 01:26:13 AM »

Not order drunken noodles until today

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #12 on: May 13, 2019, 01:32:52 AM »
Tried to wash my hands with toothpaste.

Was v tired, they live in the same place in the bathroom, and I thought “must clean hands - there cleaner thing - apply to hand”. Didn’t go much further than application, but still felt a berk.

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #13 on: May 13, 2019, 03:00:05 AM »
Peeled all the skin off my finger tips to keep myself busy and now it really hurts :(

St_Eddie

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #14 on: May 13, 2019, 04:12:15 AM »
Peeled all the skin off my finger tips to keep myself busy and now it really hurts :(

My God, man.  What have you done to your avatar?  I now cannot stop hovering my own cursor over the fake one.  Damn you.  You deserve to have lost your finger tips for that reason alone.

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #15 on: May 13, 2019, 08:21:18 AM »
Purchased a house

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #16 on: May 13, 2019, 09:10:51 AM »
Bought a skateboard. I’m 43.

I'm incredibly tempted to respond to the below advert, so I may well beat able to beat you soon:



I mean, nothing good can possibly come from this.

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #17 on: May 13, 2019, 09:36:11 AM »
I'd ordered some meat, and I'd put it in the freezer. Was going to cook a Sunday roast, got it out yesterday and I'd only gone and ordered a massive cow heart. Damn you Mandarin, damn you to Chinese hell, dinner ruined.

Sin Agog

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #18 on: May 13, 2019, 09:53:33 AM »
Was recently told by the Marina that I needed new mooring rope for the dilapidated piece of shit boat I live on. After untying the old rope (anyone got any money for it?), I leant on the completely untethered boat to catch my breath, which started drifting off with me attached.  I hung there for about a minute and a half, half drenched in the water, and at too awkward an angle to pull myself up.  90 seconds is a long time to just hang there like a particularly ugly strain of seaweed before you swallow your masculine pride and issue a series of croaky yelpy helps until a neighbour comes and rescues you, but that's what I did.

alan nagsworth

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #19 on: May 13, 2019, 09:59:58 AM »
Purchased a house

What, accidentally?

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #20 on: May 13, 2019, 10:38:53 AM »

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #21 on: May 13, 2019, 10:45:14 AM »
Poured orange juice on Weetabix instead of milk while half-awake. Ate it anyway reasoning that "Well, how bad could it be?"

Quite bad, it turns out. Quite, quite bad.

Buelligan

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #22 on: May 13, 2019, 10:47:09 AM »
I did that with my last British tea bag and grapefruit juice recently.  Didn't bother drinking it.  I think the moral is, never get that tired if you've got no gak.

alan nagsworth

  • meat suite marathon!
Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #23 on: May 13, 2019, 10:58:53 AM »
Yeah I accidentally chucked a load of cocaine on my croissant earlier instead of powdered sugar. I’ve been starting to think my new career choice of motivational speaker was a total flop but today it’s suddenly all starting to make sense. Fucking nailed it.

Buelligan

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #24 on: May 13, 2019, 11:40:51 AM »
Take the straw out of your nose next time though, eh?

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #25 on: May 13, 2019, 12:10:22 PM »
I'm incredibly tempted to respond to the below advert, so I may well beat able to beat you soon:



I mean, nothing good can possibly come from this.

Buy it and bring it to the Beak on Saturday.  I will go halves.

Dex Sawash

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #26 on: May 13, 2019, 12:38:45 PM »
I'm incredibly tempted to respond to the below advert, so I may well beat able to beat you soon:



I mean, nothing good can possibly come from this.

Should be a load of cheap 4G models around after the 5G rollout

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #27 on: May 13, 2019, 12:43:02 PM »

alan nagsworth

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Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #28 on: May 13, 2019, 01:29:17 PM »
Coerced into it !

You must be quite gullible. Someone came in the pub once and tried to sell me a side of beef and I was having none of it. I can’t imagine anyone ever falling for the same tactic where the side of beef is replaced with a four bed semi-detached, which I am assuming is exactly what happened to you.

Re: What's the stupidest thing you've done recently?
« Reply #29 on: May 13, 2019, 03:16:46 PM »
It’s worse than that - I only got a 3 bed - and one of the “bedrooms” you’d be lucky to get a single bed in it