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Blocking up our urethras: a CaB experiment

Started by Replies From View, May 14, 2019, 12:58:19 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

St_Eddie

My urethra was blocked up with pee this morning but when I finished using the toilet, it had disappeared!  Apparently, my urethra is the reincarnation of Harry Houdini himself.

Replies From View

Quote from: pancreas on May 18, 2019, 10:37:49 AM
I don't know, but he's asking to be let out, or at least if I can send a croissant down there.

This was anticipated.


Next item on the urethral massage agenda:  ONE WAXED CROISSANT

Replies From View

Quote from: St_Eddie on May 18, 2019, 10:43:58 AM
My urethra was blocked up with pee this morning but when I finished using the toilet, it had disappeared!  Apparently, my urethra is the reincarnation of Harry Houdini himself.

Indeed!  Many many people have been taking part in this experiment and sending me private messages rather than contributing to this thread, and they have been saying exactly the same thing!

It appears that chewed brambles, a live woodpecker, a shredded copy of Unreliable Memoirs and 6kg of glass fibre insulation - in that order - have exceptional absorption qualities that aren't matched by any other sponge or kitchen paper technology.

Waxed croissant now please!

St_Eddie

I have inserted a waxed croissant, as instructed.  I also inserted some waxed jam (strawberry colour) to go with it.  My urethra emitted a satisfied belch in return.

Replies From View

It seems this process has far more benefits than drawbacks once you get fully stuck in!

St_Eddie

#65
Quote from: Replies From View on May 18, 2019, 12:43:59 PM
It seems this process has far more benefits than drawbacks once you get fully stuck in!

I don't know about that.  It's too early to tell.  Now that it has a taste for such things, what if my urethra starts demanding a waxed croissant and waxed jam (strawberry colour) every single morning?  There's nothing worse than an insatiable urethra.

Either way, the experiment must continue unabated, as science demands.  May I suggest the next item to be inserted into all of our urethras be a Aretha Franklin album?  I'm curious to see if it will have become an Urethra Franklin album once expunged.

Replies From View

We'll have to see if your own personal decision to addict your urethra to waxed jam is something you'll go on to regret.

pancreas

It's been sent back up with a note asking for an almond one. Bit presumptuous, really.

Replies From View

Quote from: pancreas on May 18, 2019, 01:39:32 PM
It's been sent back up with a note asking for an almond one. Bit presumptuous, really.

Curious.  A urethra with a sweet tooth.

pancreas

I guess I should do what it says? Resistance seems futile right now.

Replies From View

Actually, save the almond croissant until later as the next item to go into the urethral passage may or may not bring about a change and it will be interesting to find out.

Next item:  ALL THE MILK TEETH THAT YOUR PARENTS KEPT FROM WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD


If you don't know where they are, ask.  They did keep them.

St_Eddie

Quote from: Replies From View on May 18, 2019, 01:13:42 PM
We'll have to see if your own personal decision to addict your urethra to waxed jam is something you'll go on to regret.

Gah!  Why did I have to be such a maverick by feeding my urethra an item not on the officially sanctioned list?!  I shall forever rue the day that I inserted waxed jam (strawberry colour) into my piss pipe.

Quote from: Replies From View on May 18, 2019, 01:50:45 PM
If you don't know where they are, ask.  They did keep them.

My Mother insists that the Tooth Fairy has possession of them and she wouldn't lie to me.  My urethra told me so.

Replies From View

I'm so sorry but your mother did keep them.

St_Eddie

Quote from: Replies From View on May 18, 2019, 02:20:18 PM
I'm so sorry but your mother did keep them.

So... you're saying my Mother's the Tooth Fairy?!  Quids in!

Replies From View

Quote from: St_Eddie on May 18, 2019, 02:24:06 PM
So... you're saying my Mother's the Tooth Fairy?!  Quids in!

Okay so you have all your old milk teeth found and ready?


TEST 1 FOR CURING OF URETHRA'S SWEET TOOTH BY ADDITION OF A WIDE SELECTION OF MILK TEETH INITIALISING....


COMMENCE INSERTION INTO URETHRAL PASSAGE........ NOW

St_Eddie

Well, they're in there.  My urethra is now sporting a lovely set of gnashers and I've put an extra toothbrush next to mine.

I'm now considering casting my urethra in a gender swapped remake of the 2007 film, Teeth.

Replies From View


Glebe


pancreas

Quote from: Replies From View on May 18, 2019, 02:58:32 PM
Very good.

Everyone else done that?

Yes, but they're not happy down there. Singing the internationale.