Author Topic: EUROVISION 2019!  (Read 11133 times)

Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #870 on: May 24, 2019, 12:53:33 AM »
I personally believe Europe should be nuked from orbit, for the way they mock us, if voting us low in a pop concert competition isn't an act of war, then I don't what is anymore.

Mr_Simnock

  • Ես ուզում անդորր
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #871 on: May 24, 2019, 01:50:09 AM »
Bit late but this year was a belter. The second half was almost flawless as an example of Eurovision. Didn't have Netherlands anywhere near my top 5 (Norway, Italy, Azerbaijan, Australia, Switzerland if you're interested).

Michael Rice shouldn't have come last but only because he was better than the German song. We're crap every year because we toss out an awful song from an uncharismatic no-hoper. I really don't understand why one year they can't persuade someone with a lot of weight to get behind it.

Because there would be a very real chance of said hypothetical someone coming outside the top 10 to some absolute shite and would have quite an adverse affect on their career, it's just not worth it.

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #872 on: May 24, 2019, 08:40:44 PM »
Because there would be a very real chance of said hypothetical someone coming outside the top 10 to some absolute shite and would have quite an adverse affect on their career, it's just not worth it.

This. Engelbert H. and Bonnie T. were probably quite content with the state of their autumnal careers, and I think they were still quite pissed of about the poor showings they got.

Personally I don’t think the UK can ever do well in the contest. Between the various blocs who’ll always support each other, certain countries having large and disparate expat populations, and the fact that between Brexit and being the US’s lapdog in the Iraq war we’re pariahs in Europe. I’m not saying that means we flounce for good, or drop out of the Big Five; I don’t know what the solution is.

BlodwynPig

  • The Last Living Member of COVID-20
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #873 on: May 24, 2019, 08:49:00 PM »
This. Engelbert H. and Bonnie T. were probably quite content with the state of their autumnal careers, and I think they were still quite pissed of about the poor showings they got.

Personally I don’t think the UK can ever do well in the contest. Between the various blocs who’ll always support each other, certain countries having large and disparate expat populations, and the fact that between Brexit and being the US’s lapdog in the Iraq war we’re pariahs in Europe. I’m not saying that means we flounce for good, or drop out of the Big Five; I don’t know what the solution is.

You mean like the Irish-Maltese-UK bloc???

Rolf Lundgren

  • Remember you're a Womble
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #874 on: May 24, 2019, 08:54:42 PM »
Because there would be a very real chance of said hypothetical someone coming outside the top 10 to some absolute shite and would have quite an adverse affect on their career, it's just not worth it.

Take someone very successful like Ed Sheeran or Ellie Goulding and I can't believe their career would grind to a halt because of doing poorly in Eurovision. That's assuming they would do poorly and chances are they wouldn't. If a well past their best Blue could pull off a half decent effort then a pop star at the height of their powers would run away with it.

Personally I don’t think the UK can ever do well in the contest. Between the various blocs who’ll always support each other, certain countries having large and disparate expat populations, and the fact that between Brexit and being the US’s lapdog in the Iraq war we’re pariahs in Europe. I’m not saying that means we flounce for good, or drop out of the Big Five; I don’t know what the solution is.

Russia annexed Crimea and they still keep getting more votes than us. Seems to me that a far more likely reason for our continued poor performance is that we keep sending up nobodies with duff songs.

imitationleather

  • "The French... are famous... for their kissing"
    • http://last.fm/user/ImiLeathr
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #875 on: May 24, 2019, 09:17:57 PM »
Israel winning surely lays to rest any idea that the competition is decided by blocs of countries voting for each other, or that you can't win with an appalling military record.

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #876 on: May 24, 2019, 09:33:40 PM »
You mean like the Irish-Maltese-UK bloc???

Yeah, but that ceased to be a thing at least a decade ago.

Russia annexed Crimea and they still keep getting more votes than us. Seems to me that a far more likely reason for our continued poor performance is that we keep sending up nobodies with duff songs.

Eurovision is full of nobodies with duff songs. we don't know who 90% of the contestants are, so why should they know who ours are? In fact, one thing the commentators are often to be heard saying is "He/she won their country's version of The X-Factor" - whereas ours came fourth here. I'm not saying you're wrong, we may well just have bigger nobodies with duffer songs. And there was a bit of an anti-Russian backlash post-Crimea; it didn't last though. Perhaps if we still had gas to threaten to not send them, other countries would vote for us again...

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #877 on: May 24, 2019, 09:36:29 PM »
Israel winning surely lays to rest any idea that the competition is decided by blocs of countries voting for each other, or that you can't win with an appalling military record.

That was bizarre, I'll admit. Because it was a really shit song and performance. You'd think between antisemitism and pro-Palestinism they wouldn't get anywhere. So something's going on - I just don't know what... If we could figure it out, maybe we could fix it.

Captain Z

  • Oh yeah my cholesterol's going down
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #878 on: May 25, 2019, 12:25:59 AM »
I just don't think the music tastes of the UK are shared that closely with the rest of Europe, and vice versa. Maybe when it comes to the huge A-list names like Ed Sheeran, but take for instance 'Daddy Yankee - Con Calma' which is currently in many top 10's across Europe and the world, yet totally unheard of in the UK (reached #66). We have our own extremely vibrant music scenes, a much closer link to the far more lucrative US market, and a tendency to not embrace foreign-language music, so it isn't likely to change.

BlodwynPig

  • The Last Living Member of COVID-20
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #879 on: May 25, 2019, 03:18:28 AM »
I just don't think the music tastes of the UK are shared that closely with the rest of Europe, and vice versa. Maybe when it comes to the huge A-list names like Ed Sheeran, but take for instance 'Los Lobos - La Bamba' which is currently in many top 10's across Europe and the world, yet totally unheard of in the UK (reached #1). We have our own extremely vibrant music scenes, a much closer link to the far more lucrative US market, and a tendency to not embrace foreign-language music, so it isn't likely to change.

Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #880 on: May 25, 2019, 07:55:16 AM »
I still think that the main problem is the shit songs.
Can anyone even hum a second of any UK song from this century?
The only one that was memorable in any way was Bargain Booze Barry noncing at those schoolgirls - and that was only because it was disturbing.

They had the right idea with Blue (no, hear me out).
A band who 1) had been successful across Europe and had a decent fan base and 2) were desperate enough to do it.
I think they finished about 10th.

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #881 on: May 25, 2019, 09:26:50 AM »
Last year’s entry, Suri or Shuri or whoever she was, I forgot how the song went while I was listening to it. Blue were definitely a step in the right direction, odd as that feels to write it. People took the piss out of them before and after (though mercifully whatsisface’s time on Strictly last year seems to have eclipsed it), sure they only did it for the money and to backbone their reform/comeback, but it could have gone a lot worse and they acquitted themselves well.

Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #882 on: May 25, 2019, 09:54:30 AM »
Blue were definitely a step in the right direction, odd as that feels to write it. People took the piss out of them before and after (though mercifully whatsisface’s time on Strictly last year seems to have eclipsed it), sure they only did it for the money and to backbone their reform/comeback, but it could have gone a lot worse and they acquitted themselves well.

And obviously during.

JesusAndYourBush

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Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #883 on: May 25, 2019, 11:43:03 AM »
I really don't understand why one year they can't persuade someone with a lot of weight to get behind it.

It's not the singer it's the song.  To do well a song has to have the right amount of Europop/eurocrap naffness.  The UK's entry can be the best song in the world but if it's merely a "song" and not a "Eurovision song" then it's always going to fail.

Chriddof

  • Sad mammal.
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #884 on: May 25, 2019, 01:41:58 PM »
Maybe instead of trying to win, we should just embrace the fact that nobody will vote for us and send in some really bizarre avant garde madness every year from now on. I mean, we're not going to get disqualified.

Mr_Simnock

  • Ես ուզում անդորր
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #885 on: May 25, 2019, 02:31:13 PM »
I think we should certainly stop being a member of the big 5 and enter like any other country and have to go through the semi-finals. That way our song would at least get a bit more airing before the final with the euro voting public. I think the fact we get to the final anyway regardless of who we send or how shit the song is does piss a lot of voters off.

Zetetic

  • Worrying the carcass of an old song.
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #886 on: May 25, 2019, 02:38:29 PM »
Stay part of the big 5 in terms of cash, but withdraw from the actual contest as an act of contrition.

Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #887 on: May 25, 2019, 04:40:22 PM »
I think we should certainly stop being a member of the big 5 and enter like any other country and have to go through the semi-finals. That way our song would at least get a bit more airing before the final with the euro voting public. I think the fact we get to the final anyway regardless of who we send or how shit the song is does piss a lot of voters off.

Automatically qualifying obviously doesn't help but, instead of the UK being in the semi finals, I'd do away with the semi finals altogether.
A 45 song Eurovision final? YES PLEASE!

Also releasing/promoting the song across Europe a month before the contest seems to help.
The winning song (and a few others that finished near the top) were already hits.
I'd guess that the vast majority of voters had never heard the UK's song until the final.
It still needs to be a better song though.

imitationleather

  • "The French... are famous... for their kissing"
    • http://last.fm/user/ImiLeathr
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #888 on: May 25, 2019, 06:54:10 PM »
Wow. The guy who did the UK's entry in 2006, Daz Sampson, tried (and failed) to represent Belarus this year: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=671molHtIEc

Oh dear. :/

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #889 on: May 25, 2019, 07:39:29 PM »
Also Kym Marsh and Anthony Costa. Fucking hell.

greencalx

  • Never knowingly knowledgeable
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #890 on: May 25, 2019, 09:03:46 PM »
Maybe we’d do better if we were allowed to enter the four constituent nations? Might be regarded as cheating though.

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #891 on: May 25, 2019, 09:06:19 PM »
Tricky. I think the “United Kingdom” is the entity that is the EBU member.

Zetetic

  • Worrying the carcass of an old song.
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #892 on: May 25, 2019, 09:07:49 PM »
I thought it was interesting that there was a bloke with a little Welsh flag prominently placed throughout most of the final. (And I think I saw a few Scottish ones.)

Probably MOSSADed now, just in case, of course.


Captain Z

  • Oh yeah my cholesterol's going down
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #893 on: May 25, 2019, 10:02:44 PM »
I would guess a few other countries are feeling the same way too. Finland didn't even get through the semis with internet meme sensation Darude producing their track, and Spain finished near the bottom despite Latin-influenced tracks doing well generally in charts and EV2018, and going to town on staging. France entered an absolute box-ticker and still finished on the right-hand side of the screen.

græskar

  • I want to dance, can you help me
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #894 on: May 28, 2019, 12:26:35 AM »
Have you heard the new song Hatari released right after Eurovision? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xy84LnL_ghA&list=RDXy84LnL_ghA&start_radio=1

I love it so much, I honestly think they're a revelation

Zetetic

  • Worrying the carcass of an old song.
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #895 on: May 28, 2019, 07:55:16 PM »
I'm saving it, given their limited selection.

I keep worrying that I'm going to watch an interview that forces me to conclude that they're pillocks, but there's always the cake one.

Rolf Lundgren

  • Remember you're a Womble
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #896 on: May 29, 2019, 08:02:45 PM »
It's not the singer it's the song.  To do well a song has to have the right amount of Europop/eurocrap naffness.  The UK's entry can be the best song in the world but if it's merely a "song" and not a "Eurovision song" then it's always going to fail.

If you look at the winners over the last 10 years or so, there's only a couple you'd call naff. A lot of the other winners wouldn't look out of place on the UK chart.

That's something to be said about being one of the big 5 going against it what with Germany also doing rubbish nearly other year although their songs are awful too. The BBC are in an odd place though in that they pay a lot of money to take part and yet don't make any effort to produce an entry that's halfway decent.

Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #897 on: May 29, 2019, 09:08:39 PM »
The BBC are in an odd place though in that they pay a lot of money to take part and yet don't make any effort to produce an entry that's halfway decent.

The lack of promotion is a problem for the UK's songs.
Most of the songs that do well are already hits across Europe - particularly in Scandinavia and/or the Balkans.

The last time one of the Big 5 won was lovely Lena for Germany, with a song that was getting airplay pretty much everywhere outside the UK. Sending her across Europe on a month-long charm offensive probably didn't hurt either.
It was a decent enough song (by ESC standards), but the promotion helped A LOT.

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: EUROVISION 2019!
« Reply #898 on: May 29, 2019, 09:27:40 PM »
The two times I bothered to watch the voting show for the UK’s entry, neither occasion did the best song win. Perhaps coincidentally both times the winners were pretty young boys; as I say, that may be a coincidence so I’m not going to speculate as to who voted for them or why. And in between those times, that Shuri or Suri won )but I didn’t watch) so, go figure.

Perhaps they need to review how high-scoring/obviously popular/winning entries get picked by this countries. What are the factors? The (local) popularity of the artist? Is the song a strong one, that makes an impression in itself, rather than just a song that some X-Factor reject who’s willing (read: desperate) happens to have handy?

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