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Simpsons quote thread? Simpsons quote thread.

Started by The Lurker, May 30, 2019, 04:38:25 PM

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Jim Bob

Quote from: Kryton on November 26, 2019, 12:11:52 PM
Didn't a British guest character once call someone a 'wanker'? I think it was cut from telly but it was defo on the video release of whatever episode it was that I can't quite remember now.

Edit: Just googled it, it was U2 in Trash of the titans.

Quite a strong word to use in a show like this.

https://simpsonswiki.com/wiki/List_of_vulgar_words

Also notice they've used shite once, wanking and piss.

Blimey.

That's nothing.  On one of The Simpsons DVDs, which I own, there's a fully animated deleted scene/outtake where one of the guest stars says "fuck", uncensored!  Makes me wonder if it accidentally slipped through the cracks of the ratings board because I'm pretty sure that it shouldn't be on a family targeted DVD.  I'm glad that it is though.

Quote from: Captain Z on November 26, 2019, 12:38:08 PM
Wank/er/ing is meaningless in America, they just don't use the word.

This was true at the time that the episode was made but no longer holds true.  Americans have adopted the word 'wanker' from us Brits over the past few years and its usage is becoming more and more ubiquitous over there.  This annoys me to an inordinate extent.  Fuck off with stealing our swear words!

buttgammon

At least they can pronounce 'wanker', which I more than I can say for 'twat'.

kalowski

Quote from: Jim Bob on November 27, 2019, 02:28:05 AM
.Americans have adopted the word 'wanker' from us Brits over the past few years and its usage is becoming more and more ubiquitous over there.  This annoys me to an inordinate extent.  Fuck off with stealing our swear words!
It was used very effectively in This is Spinal Tap.

Jim Bob

Quote from: kalowski on November 27, 2019, 10:23:43 PM
It was used very effectively in This is Spinal Tap.

Aye, but they were American actors (flawlessly) portraying British characters, so it gets a free pass.

My beef is with the general American public adopting our swear word as their own.  It's far from being among the worst crimes of cultural appropriation admittedly, but it's still cultural appropriation all the same.  Just rubs me up the wrong way.

Ferris

Quote from: Jim Bob on November 28, 2019, 12:16:56 AM
Aye, but they were American actors (flawlessly) portraying British characters, so it gets a free pass.

My beef is with the general American public adopting our swear word as their own.  It's far from being among the worst crimes of cultural appropriation admittedly, but it's still cultural appropriation all the same.  Just rubs me up the wrong way.

Christopher Guest is British-American, as far as I'm aware.

I'm also yet to hear anyone say "wanker" in a decade of North American living, although the pronunciation of "twat" leaves a lot to be desired.

imitationleather

I've heard Americans say "wank" and "wanker". They sounded as comfortable as I did when I taught an English class that, for some reason, was on the topic of Japanese mountains.

Jim Bob

Quote from: imitationleather on November 28, 2019, 12:54:14 AM
I've heard Americans say "wank" and "wanker". They sounded as comfortable as I did when I taught an English class that, for some reason, was on the topic of Japanese mountains.

Yep.  It's definitely a thing.  I've heard an increasing number of Americans using that word on various podcasts and whatnot over the past few years.

dissolute ocelot

There's just not enough words for masturbation in the American language, they have to steal ours. (Although Flanders' favorite word "diddle" means "wank" too.)

DrGreggles

Do the Americans even use 'wank' as meaning masturbation though?

samadriel

It's like 'cunt', they can't say it naturally.

checkoutgirl

Quick, mom, whip up a cake before dad fires you.

checkoutgirl

Crying in the corner huh? Mind if I join you?

No, go ahead.


dallasman

"It's these new dentures".
"Well, it was an evil game."

I find I recite one of these to myself at least once a week, because they're apt for when you got something wrong, or when you add an offensive twist to a joke everyone was enjoying just fine without you. Unfortunately, they're too obscure to work as references in most settings.

Jim Bob

"Do you come with the car?"

"Oh, you!  Hehehe"

"Do you come with the car?"

"Oh, you!  Hehehe"

checkoutgirl

Quote from: Jim Bob on November 30, 2019, 05:41:02 PM
"Do you come with the car?"

"Oh, you!  Hehehe"

"Do you come with the car?"

"Oh, you!  Hehehe"

Good one.

The Lurker

Bart: Tune in tomorrow, and every day, until the curfew is lifted because we'll be revealing embarrassing secrets about Springfield's other adults.

Homer: Well, at least they've already done me.

Bart: And we have plenty more on Homer Simpson.

Homer: D'oh!


bgmnts

"Even Lisa?"

"ESPECIALLY LISA, but ESPECIALLY Bart!"

Kryton


Kryton

Bart: What are you in for?
Boy: I moved here from Canada and they think I'm slow eh?
Girl: I fell off the jungle gym and when I woke up I was in here.
Boy 2: I start fires!

bgmnts

Hank: I didn't even give you my coat!

Homer: All right, team, it's the fourth quarter. The Lord gave us the atoms, and it's up to us to make 'em dance!

SteveDave


madhair60


Ferris

"Dr Nick Riviera, please report to the coroner's office immediately."

The coroner? I am so sick of that guy!

samadriel


Kryton

Dr Hibbert: It's such a beautiful day, I don't know why don't operate outside more often.

* Tennis ball lands in patient's chest cavity *

Dr Hibbert: Time of death. 10:15 - Hehehehehe

Kryton

"Johnny, how is your mother?"

Johnny Tightlips:"Whoa, hey, who says I have a mother?"

Blumf

Quote from: Kryton on December 05, 2019, 09:59:18 PM
"Johnny, how is your mother?"

Johnny Tightlips:"Whoa, hey, who says I have a mother?"

"Johnny Tightlips, can you see the shooter?"
"I see a lot of things."
"You know, you could be a little more helpful."

Jim Bob

"What's the matter wid ya, kid?  Ya told me this stream was shallow!  Why you whe-heh-huh-huh, you oooohhhhh, kid, I'll-get-even-with-you.  I'lllllaarrgghhhhbbblluurrrgggghhhh glug glug glug"

Consignia

Quote from: Blumf on December 06, 2019, 03:33:00 AM
"Johnny Tightlips, can you see the shooter?"
"I see a lot of things."
"You know, you could be a little more helpful."

"What do I tell the doctor?"
"Tell him to suck a lemon"