Author Topic: Simpsons quote thread? Simpsons quote thread. (Read 13943 times)

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #390 on:** August 06, 2019, 02:52:47 PM »

*getting off the bus*

The guys made kind of a mess in your bathroom.

What bathroom?

FerriswheelBueller · « **Reply #391 on:** August 06, 2019, 03:49:07 PM »

Similarly, Abe Simpson coming out of a portaloo.

“This elevator only goes to the basement... and somebody made an aaawful mess down there”

Sebastian Cobb · « **Reply #392 on:** August 06, 2019, 07:50:07 PM »

"Opening day at the world's first two-story outhouse."

"Oh God! STOP!"

JamesTC · « **Reply #393 on:** August 06, 2019, 09:32:41 PM »

Abe: I’m going to the outhouse.
Lisa: We don’t have an outhouse.
Homer: My tool shed!

The Lurker · « **Reply #394 on:** August 07, 2019, 09:57:35 AM »

It's Kurns, stupid!

DrGreggles · « **Reply #395 on:** August 07, 2019, 12:59:59 PM »

Quote from: The Lurker on August 07, 2019, 09:57:35 AM

It's Kurns, stupid!

"Ooh, he card read good!"

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #396 on:** August 07, 2019, 04:37:12 PM »

Are you enjoying your buffalo testicle?

Yes very much.

Captain Z · « **Reply #397 on:** August 10, 2019, 07:12:45 PM »

Chan Ho, your mother Mia and I are getting a divorce.

Chan Ho is over there. I am Chin Ho.

Whoever you are, just pass it along, kid.

SteveDave · « **Reply #398 on:** August 12, 2019, 03:00:24 PM »

The wars of the future will not be fought on the battlefield or at sea. They will be fought in space, or possibly on top of a very tall mountain. In either case, most of the actual fighting will be done by small robots. And as you go forth today remember always your duty is clear: To build and maintain those robots.

FerriswheelBueller · « **Reply #399 on:** August 13, 2019, 01:34:02 AM »

Oh Edna, we both know these children have no future!

...err prove me wrong kids. Prove me wrong.

The Lurker · « **Reply #400 on:** August 14, 2019, 07:31:38 AM »

Oh yeah, what are you gonna do? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouth and when they bark they shoot bees at you? Well, go ahead, do your worst!

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #401 on:** August 14, 2019, 02:55:26 PM »

And this guy's head of the Spaceology Department at the Correspondence College of Tampa!

jobotic · « **Reply #402 on:** August 14, 2019, 11:50:43 PM »

You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel.

Scammin · « **Reply #403 on:** August 15, 2019, 02:23:53 PM »

Apologies if this one has already been done:

“And doctor, we know that you and the bootblack have been rogering the fishwife in the crumpet shop”

SteveDave · « **Reply #404 on:** August 15, 2019, 03:57:12 PM »

From the same episode

"That's not Latin"

"Well, I didn't think I was rehabilitated, but, uh I guess they needed the extra bed"

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #405 on:** August 15, 2019, 10:11:22 PM »

You're like all Easter bunnies, can't take a punch to the crotch.

alan nagsworth · « **Reply #406 on:** August 15, 2019, 10:21:55 PM »

Homer doing a really piss poor job of pretending he won the jackpot on a scratch card and then Apu wrestling with him to reveal he in fact did not win:

"Oh, Mr. Simpson... What has reduced you to such cheap chicanery?"

fuckin "chicanery" man, brilliant word

alan nagsworth · « **Reply #407 on:** August 15, 2019, 10:24:10 PM »

Also

"I'm feeling kinda low Apu, you got any of that beer that has candy floating in it? You know, Skittlebrau?"

"Such a product does not exist sir. I think you must have dreamed it."

The Lurker · « **Reply #408 on:** August 16, 2019, 04:11:49 AM »

I want to help you, George Washington? Even your dreams are square

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #409 on:** August 16, 2019, 01:09:53 PM »

Kids, your daddy and his daddy are involved in a very sticky *see Bart eating a chocolate bar* nutty, chewy, chocolatey... PUT IT AWAY, BOY! situation.

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #410 on:** August 16, 2019, 02:37:06 PM »

Now let's raise the roof for the bland, informative rap of MC Safety and the Caution Crew.

Yo Yo Yo Yo,
Y'all feelin' cautious?
I say a crosswalk a crossity walk, and you don't stop crossing till you're on the next block.
First you look both ways, and you walk not run;
Obeying safety rules is acceptable fun.
Break it down now!
Walk don't run;
Drink juice.
Yum Yum!

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #411 on:** August 18, 2019, 01:21:56 PM »

I'll have the smiley-face breakfast special. But could you add a bacon nose? Plus bacon hair, bacon mustache, five o'clock shadow made of bacon bits, and A bacon body.

How 'bout if I just shoved a pig down your throat? I'm kidding.

Fine! But the bacon man lives in a bacon house!

No, he doesn't!

kalowski · « **Reply #412 on:** August 18, 2019, 04:13:30 PM »

"Homer, tell your child what you bought when I sent you to town to get some insurance.”
“Curse you, magic beans!”
“Oh, stop blaming the beans.”

FerriswheelBueller · « **Reply #413 on:** August 18, 2019, 04:19:36 PM »

Don’t eat me, I have a wife and family! Eat them!

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #414 on:** August 18, 2019, 04:21:43 PM »

My bongo drums!
My strobelight!
My Best of Ray Stevens featuring`The Streak' album!

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #415 on:** August 18, 2019, 04:23:51 PM »

Your cable TV is experiencing difficulties. Please, do not panic. Resist the temptation to read or talk to loved ones. Do not attempt sexual relations.

Captain Z · « **Reply #416 on:** August 18, 2019, 05:34:07 PM »

I believe it was a boaking accident

Phil_A · « **Reply #417 on:** **Yesterday** at 12:02:59 AM »

We now return you to "The Return Of The Pink Panther Returns", starring Ken Wahl as Inspector Clouseau

drdad · « **Reply #418 on:** **Yesterday** at 02:32:44 PM »

Boy... when Marge first told me she was going to the police academy, I thought it'd be fun and exciting! You know, like that movie - Spaceballs. But instead it's been painful and disturbing, like that movie Police Academy.

checkoutgirl · « **Reply #419 on:** **Yesterday** at 02:36:15 PM »

Quote from: Phil_A on Yesterday at 12:02:59 AM

We now return you to "The Return Of The Pink Panther Returns", starring Ken Wahl as Inspector Clouseau

Next, on Exploitation Theatre...Blacula, followed by Blackenstein, and The Blunchblack of Blotre Blame!

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Author Topic: Simpsons quote thread? Simpsons quote thread. (Read 13943 times)