Author Topic: Milonga dildo commotion  (Read 2439 times)

Lt. Organphalia

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #60 on: June 05, 2019, 01:01:07 AM »
Very sorry to hear the camera on your phone is broken.

Lisa Jesusandmarychain

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #61 on: June 05, 2019, 09:08:05 AM »
Very sorry to hear the camera on your phone is broken.

"Too Niche" admit Hallmark Cards.
(can't be arsed linking to that Fry and Laurie sketch, soz.)

machotrouts

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #62 on: June 09, 2019, 01:37:59 AM »
I want to know more about the blender-in-a-bag woman.

Her masturbation techniques are her own business.

Surely you pass a public bin on the way to Tango.

The packaging is recyclable. I am not going to destroy the planet over my sex toy shame.

I hope you're not suggesting I bin my dildos. That is a last resort. Also, my mum's driving me to tango this week, what do you want me to do, wind down the window and hurl the fucking dildo out at the pavement? Get my mum arrested for facilitating sex crimes? Is that what you bastards FUCKING want?

But the specific answer to your question is, mechanical differences. Some dildos are made with functions other than "get in an arsehole".

I feel like this warranted more speculation than it received.

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #63 on: June 09, 2019, 01:47:10 AM »
I feel like this warranted more speculation than it received.

I did google 'Tenga Flip Hole' and visit their website, if it's any consolation. Some of those only last for 50 sessions. That's like a quid a session. And it's not very green, is it? Not impressed.

And I was distracted by the blender. The curiosity is killing me. Next time you see that woman, can you ask her why she took a blender to tango? Offer to tell her what's in your bag if she'll spill the beans.

machotrouts

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #64 on: June 09, 2019, 02:03:06 AM »
I did google 'Tenga Flip Hole' and visit their website, if it's any consolation.

Now, it's important to bear in mind here that a Tenga Flip Hole is not a dildo with an alternative function. That is not what I'm referring to. A Tenga Flip Hole is a Tenga Flip Hole. It is no kind of dildo at all.

I don't know what the generic term is for sex toys you put your dick in. "Male sex toys" is not very trans-inclusive. I have seen a man propose "engulfers", so. It's an engulfer.

And it's not very green, is it?

It's black.

And I was distracted by the blender. The curiosity is killing me.

Well I'm sorry but she brutally murdered us all. Blended us to smithereens. I just thought that would be too distracting from my story but if you must insist.

Next time you see that woman, can you ask her why she took a blender to tango? Offer to tell her what's in your bag if she'll spill the beans.

I haven't actually considered a "Next time" yet. Am I allowed into future milongae? Do I have to get a milongamate to Metal Gear Solid me in every time?

Metal Gear Solid is actually an anagram of "milonga dildos". It's true and you don't have to check it.
« Last Edit: June 09, 2019, 02:34:02 AM by machotrouts »

Dex Sawash

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #65 on: June 09, 2019, 02:25:45 AM »

I feel like this warranted more speculation than it received.

<quietly ruminates on non up arse purposes>

Ah yes, that sort of thing.

machotrouts

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #66 on: June 09, 2019, 02:33:43 AM »
NO not NON-up arse purposes things they can do IN ADDITION to being put up an arse.

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #67 on: June 09, 2019, 04:18:58 AM »
Now, it's important to bear in mind here that a Tenga Flip Hole is not a dildo with an alternative function. That is not what I'm referring to. A Tenga Flip Hole is a Tenga Flip Hole. It is no kind of dildo at all.

Okay, I'll bite. What more can there possibly be than 'get in an arsehole'?

Quote
I don't know what the generic term is for sex toys you put your dick in. "Male sex toys" is not very trans-inclusive. I have seen a man propose "engulfers", so. It's an engulfer.

A nobby holder?

Quote
I haven't actually considered a "Next time" yet. Am I allowed into future milongae? Do I have to get a milongamate to Metal Gear Solid me in every time?

Is Solid Snake the name of one of your dildos?

Quote
Metal Gear Solid is actually an anagram of "milonga dildos". It's true and you don't have to check it.

I checked it. I am disappoint. However, I have some valid anagrams of milonga dildos. Some of them sound like they could be alternative names for engulfers.

Midlands igloo
Old maid losing
Misdo gonad ill
India doll smog
Dali sodom ling
Dismal dong oil
Midas gold loin
Solid along mid
Old glans idiom
Domino slag lid
Liminal god sod
Somali dong lid

St_Eddie

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #68 on: June 09, 2019, 06:00:09 AM »
I hope you're not suggesting I bin my dildos.

Heaven forfend!

...my mum's driving me to tango this week, what do you want me to do, wind down the window and hurl the fucking dildo out at the pavement? Get my mum arrested for facilitating sex crimes? Is that what you bastards FUCKING want?

Ehh... hmm... uhh... well, I mean... kinda.

Anagram of a Shit Name

  • Up my bollocks indeed
Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #69 on: June 09, 2019, 11:39:40 AM »
Okay, I'll bite. What more can there possibly be than 'get in an arsehole'?

A nobby holder? Laughed

Is Solid Snake the name of one of your dildos?

I checked it. I am disappoint. However, I have some valid anagrams of milonga dildos. Some of them sound like they could be alternative names for engulfers.

Midlands igloo
Old maid losing
Misdo gonad ill
India doll smog
Dali sodom ling
Dismal dong oil*
Midas gold loin
Solid along mid
Old glans idiom
Domino slag lid
Liminal god sod
Somali dong lid

*We have a winner!

Anagram of a Shit Name

  • Up my bollocks indeed
Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #70 on: June 09, 2019, 11:41:01 AM »
Ooo that was my 199th post!

Need to make the bicentennial a good one.

Anagram of a Shit Name

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #71 on: June 09, 2019, 11:43:05 AM »
Bugger

Sherringford Hovis

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #72 on: June 09, 2019, 12:16:36 PM »
Also, my mum's driving me to tango this week, what do you want me to do, wind down the window and hurl the fucking dildo out at the pavement?

NSFW
http://www.slate.fr/sites/default/files/photos/994106_208504009344986_131860742_n.jpg

Get in the car, Mum - no time to explain.

Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #73 on: June 09, 2019, 12:43:55 PM »
I don't know what the generic term is for sex toys you put your dick in. "Male sex toys" is not very trans-inclusive. I have seen a man propose "engulfers", so. It's an engulfer.

I've always thought those are "envelopers" personally. Or maybe sheaths.

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #74 on: June 09, 2019, 02:06:25 PM »
Scabbards

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #75 on: June 09, 2019, 06:41:09 PM »
I will go so far as to wonder what a gay man wants with a lot of replica penises. However I implore you, do not take that wonderment as encouragement to attempt to enlighten me.

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Milonga dildo commotion
« Reply #76 on: June 09, 2019, 07:07:45 PM »
Metal Gear Solid is actually an anagram of "milonga dildos". It's true and you don't have to check it.

Here's some anagrams of Metal Gear Solid:

Gristle à la mode
Damage till sore
Eel slot diagram
Red meat slag oil (free with Tenga Flip Hole)
Mallard ego site
Dallas ego timer
Dallas gore item
Salad ogle remit
Madras gleet oil (gleet is definitely worth a google)
A lager melodist (I heard one of these on my way back from town today)
Material sod leg
Aerial STD golem
Areola geld mist
Molest gild area
Litre model saga
Marital seed log
Marital sod glee
Get older salami
Arista model gel
Amoral edge slit
Altar lodge semi
Maltese dog rail
Agreed mail slot
Limeade slag rot
Desolate gal rim
Elated soma girl

Blimey! I didn't even make it a quarter of the way through the results: https://futureboy.us/lookup/nph-anagram.pl?orig=Metal+Gear+Solid&list=0&include=&limit=3&short=3&cap=1