Author Topic: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.  (Read 1354 times)

Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« on: June 06, 2019, 01:19:58 PM »
- Who should i support?

- What does a foot ball fan do?

- How can I find out about the rules and "lingo" of foot ball?

Foot ball fans please take me under your wing.

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #1 on: June 06, 2019, 01:21:52 PM »
- Who should i support?

Everyone just picks the team with the nicest name, like Aston Villa.

Glebe

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #2 on: June 06, 2019, 01:24:11 PM »

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #3 on: June 06, 2019, 01:40:29 PM »
Everyone just picks the team with the nicest name, like Aston Villa.

Or the team composed of their favourite animal, like Wolves.

Chollis

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #4 on: June 06, 2019, 01:50:26 PM »
Did you see that ludicrous display last night?

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #5 on: June 06, 2019, 01:54:24 PM »
The first step in becoming a Foot Ball "fan" is to learn how to throw a plastic chair at a French policeman.

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #6 on: June 06, 2019, 01:58:41 PM »
Or the team composed of their favourite animal, like Wolves.

Ha ha, you jest but I would have supported Wolves for that reason if my dad hadn't made damn sure I followed the Villa.

madhair, I think the question should be who do you want to support? Do you care whether they're in the Premier League, winning trophies or not, or whether they're local (assuming you want to support an English team)? Would it matter all that much if you couldn't get to home games? I'm guessing Cambridge United are your closest team.

BlodwynPig

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #7 on: June 06, 2019, 02:03:35 PM »
Ha ha, you jest but I would have supported Wolves for that reason if my dad hadn't made damn sure I followed the Villa.

madhair, I think the question should be who do you want to support? Do you care whether they're in the Premier League, winning trophies or not, or whether they're local (assuming you want to support an English team)? Would it matter all that much if you couldn't get to home games? I'm guessing Cambridge United are your closest team.

Cambridge City

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #8 on: June 06, 2019, 02:10:48 PM »
When I was in Year 5 and being relentlessly bullied and ostracised (to be fair, I was a weird and difficult kid) I decided that a good solution would be to pretend that I liked football. I claimed to be a fan of Manchester United, despite not being able to name a single player in that (or indeed any other) team. I also signed myself up for an after school football club - made my parents spend their actual hard earned money on a pair of shinpads and proper football boots and everything.

Went along to the first practice session and immediately remembered exactly why I utterly hated everything about football; it's outdoors but you're not allowed to notice the trees or have a quiet think for a bit, it involves running about and people shouting at you and telling you where to go, it's stupid and complicated (but not in a fun way like comic books or progressive rock) and it is only fun if you're already good at it. I did not make any friends.

Cuellar

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #9 on: June 06, 2019, 02:16:43 PM »
Don't bother. I tried once, made a concerted effort to support Arsenal.

I gained nothing from it. I remember nothing about it. It's a black hole.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #10 on: June 06, 2019, 02:26:53 PM »
You need one of those clicky things that you spin around, and a moustache.

gilbertharding

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #11 on: June 06, 2019, 02:32:16 PM »

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #12 on: June 06, 2019, 02:36:50 PM »
Everyone just picks the team with the nicest name, like Aston Villa.

My girlfriend supports Plymouth Argyle because "they have a funny name".
And she can't even pronounce it properly*.


*She emphasises 'Ply' rather than 'Plym'. She's from Barcelona America.

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #13 on: June 06, 2019, 02:38:14 PM »
Ooyah, my poor Plymouths.

kittens

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #14 on: June 06, 2019, 02:39:45 PM »
mate you will change your mind once you try to watch an episode of football. in order to be a fan of football you must already be a football fan. it's like deciding to enjoy watching animal surgery. you have to just like it already or you'll be like what the fuck is this why would anyone watch this.

Jerzy Bondov

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #15 on: June 06, 2019, 02:48:08 PM »
When I was in Year 5 and being relentlessly bullied and ostracised (to be fair, I was a weird and difficult kid) I decided that a good solution would be to pretend that I liked football. I claimed to be a fan of Manchester United, despite not being able to name a single player in that (or indeed any other) team. I also signed myself up for an after school football club - made my parents spend their actual hard earned money on a pair of shinpads and proper football boots and everything.
I did this, also in Year 5, except I said I was a fan of Tottenham Hotspur because my dad is a fan of Tottenham Hotspur, and he got me a wooly hat with the Tottenham Hotspur emblem on it. My friend, a Manchester United supporter, pointed at my hat and shouted to a teacher, 'Sir, look, he's a SPURS FAN!' and they both laughed. The teacher said 'Oh dear oh dear.'

I now realise this is an integral part of being a football supporter and the correct response would have been to loudly say that supporting Manchester United in the mid 1990s is for basic cunts, but at the time I felt that I'd just opened myself up to yet another new avenue of bullying and immediately disowned both the lads of White Hart Lane, and the entire sport of football itself.

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #16 on: June 06, 2019, 02:52:33 PM »
I did this, also in Year 5, except I said I was a fan of Tottenham Hotspur because my dad is a fan of Tottenham Hotspur, and he got me a wooly hat with the Tottenham Hotspur emblem on it. My friend, a Manchester United supporter, pointed at my hat and shouted to a teacher, 'Sir, look, he's a SPURS FAN!' and they both laughed. The teacher said 'Oh dear oh dear.'

I now realise this is an integral part of being a football supporter and the correct response would have been to loudly say that supporting Manchester United in the mid 1990s is for basic cunts, but at the time I felt that I'd just opened myself up to yet another new avenue of bullying and immediately disowned both the lads of White Hart Lane, and the entire sport of football itself.

Yeah, it was miserable being anything other than a Man Utd, Chelsea, Arsenal or Liverpool fan, and I can't blame anyone wanting to sack the whole sport off rather than put up with bullying.

Cuellar

  • She was having sly love with a midnight creeper
Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #17 on: June 06, 2019, 02:56:07 PM »
I knew one or two people who supported football for years. They'd wasted their bloody youth there. The people who support football, their faces are grey, they're in a state of despair, but nobody pays any attention you see.

gilbertharding

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #18 on: June 06, 2019, 03:02:41 PM »
At my Cambridgeshire junior school in the mid/late 70s I remember other kids mainly liked Forest, Ipswich, Liverpool, Spurs and West Ham. For no other reason than my Uncle was a HUGE fan, and to fit in by 'liking football', I chose Southampton. Like others here, I had NO IDEA about any of it, other than that people either laughed or shrugged when I said I supported them.

Although I was as much prey for bullies as the next boy, anything directed at me relating to football just went over my head.

I still count myself as a Southampton fan, but my level of interest and knowledge is only barely advanced from when I was 8.

My advice: don't bother. Especially avoid non-league.

Captain Z

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #19 on: June 06, 2019, 03:09:04 PM »
You really need to begin watching from the first season. Otherwise you'll miss some important plot points.

On that note, does anyone have links to the earlier seasons of "Foot Ball"? I'm thinking of doing a re-watch.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #20 on: June 06, 2019, 03:10:20 PM »
I wouldn't bother with the early seasons. The frame rate is terrible, and it's usually in black and white.

katzenjammer

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #21 on: June 06, 2019, 03:20:49 PM »
What happens if more than 50% of players from say Liverpool get bought by Arsenal?  Do the Liverpool fans start supporting Arsenal? 


Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #22 on: June 06, 2019, 03:38:23 PM »
Yeah, pretty much.

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #23 on: June 06, 2019, 03:55:34 PM »
I wouldn't bother with the early seasons. The frame rate is terrible, and it's usually in black and white.

I don't know, I don't think you can be a fan of football unless you watch some of Classic Football, sure the quality's patchy but the seventies and early eighties episodes are great, though like most people I'd recommend quitting after that blonde fella was badly injured and stopped playing and everyone became obsessed with the twat with curly hair.  Also if you want to really show off your knowledge I'd recommend checking out the comics, Roy Of The Rovers and Billy The Fish are particularly essential and will give you all of the behind the scenes knowledge you could ever need to know. But I wouldn't recommend the spin-off novels, bar maybe Neil Warnock's as he's really the only man who's ever understood how to manage a football team.

Lost Oliver

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #24 on: June 06, 2019, 04:08:23 PM »
Whitehawk F.C mate. That's your team.

"A section of Whitehawk's fans call themselves the Whitehawk Ultras. The Ultras aim to have fun, as well as espousing a strong anti-homophobic, anti-sexist, anti-racist and anti-fascist stance. They promote local charitable causes, non-league football and togetherness, as an antidote to what they see as the commercialised world of the Premier League. The Ultras have links with similar other fans groups such as Eastbourne Town's Pier Pressure."

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #25 on: June 06, 2019, 04:11:09 PM »
Oh dear, they support some good causes, but would they be any use in a punch up? I bet they don't even carry sharpened screwdrivers.

Lost Oliver

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #26 on: June 06, 2019, 04:13:53 PM »
The only thing they carry is love in their hearts.

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #27 on: June 06, 2019, 04:23:26 PM »
Like any subculture football has its own lexicon and rituals that seem odd to outsiders, for example if you want to join in with a kickabout at the park you need to approach the tallest player and say “I am ready for soccer, baptise me between the goalposts you substitute”. If he demurs you must collect the corner flags and join the opposing team, which is usually called Chris Rovers.

Pingers

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Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #28 on: June 06, 2019, 04:52:20 PM »
It is good to get big into foot ball because as any psychologist worth their salt will tell you, it's always best to pin all your hopes and dreams on something over which you have no control at all, anything else will cause stress and disappointment. Also, as someone who is right-minded and intelligent, you are guaranteed to back a losing side, while all the people you know who are thick and wrong and have a questionable right to life will see their chosen teams win everything, year in, year out. Those are all the best things about foot ball

Re: Decided to become a Foot Ball fan.
« Reply #29 on: June 06, 2019, 05:04:16 PM »
Like any subculture football has its own lexicon and rituals that seem odd to outsiders

When they do a goal, this is known as liquid football.