Best Goth Songs

[Jockice]

Yeah, Goth bands always tended to have ideologically problematic rockist tendencies that would inevitably sneak out over time

Yeah, they'd all start with us thinking they were doing something totally new and original and would end up as Lep Zep impersonators. Although I do think that Love Removal Machine by The Cult is one of the best comedy records of the 80s.

New page baby baby baby baby baby.

[Jockice]

One of my many music regrets is that I never saw the Danse Society play, the goth motherlode being when they supported Bauhaus. Ho hum.

Sorry if I have Gilmartin all wrong. I only have his writings to go on and the fact that there are two Danse Society's on the go says a lot. Pathetic, innit?

What was Rawlings like when you met him? Somewhere in the stuff I was reading it said he was a nice bloke. Quiet, iirc.

Also, DRUMS!

The Danse Society - Ambition - Live: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QbIIKZe80s

I'm now Facebook friends with Gilmartin so I won't have a word said against him. We have quite a few mutuals so I thought I'd send him a request and he accepted. He probably doesn't have a clue who I am (or indeed was) but he posts quite a bit of archive stuff and I agree he is a great drummer. From what I've read, the recent split seems like six of one and half a dozen of the other, but I could be wrong.

As for Rawlings he seemed like an okay bloke. But me and my mate Brendan were basically 17-year-olds trying to get in with the cool set (most of whom were only three or four years older than us) and failing miserably. His 'what the fuck are you doing here?' came when we were hanging around after the Birmingham gig hoping to get invited backstage. Which we weren't.

My favourite memory of him is seeing him absolutely bladdered coming out of the Leadmill one night with Tim the bassist basically having to hold him up. He was going: 'Tim, I really want a girlfriend. Why can't I get a girlfriend?' He obviously hadn't learned at that point that women only go for good-looking men...

Have you ever seen their first ever TV performance? I think the image needed working on a bit. Incidentally, one of the keyboardists is Paul 'Bee' Hampshire, who went on to form Getting The Fear and another band with the word 'the' in the middle (Chasing The Dragon?) and is friends with an old friend of mine in London who seems to have absolutely no idea about his previous life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MEY-r7_y8Yw

[Norton Canes]

Was never hugely into the Goth scene, despite hanging out with a nest of them in the 6th form 85-87. But one track from that era I've always loved since hearing it on the seminal This Is Electronic Body Music compilation is The Cassandra Complex - One Millionth Happy Customer

[Norton Canes]

Anyone remember Ulterior from a few years ago? This is fucking ace: Body Hammer

[purlieu]

Which Siouxsie songs count? I'm mostly familiar with Kaleidoscope, which was vaguely gothic in a way.

Most of JuJu and a the non-psychedelic sounding stuff on A Kiss in the Dreamhouse are the peak of their goth stuff, although some of the slightly ponderous late '80s stuff probably fits too.

Goth is s hard thing to pin down. It's on a continuum from Post-punk and where you draw the line is somewhat arbitrary. I'd say on one hand, Joy Division, Wire and The Cure (up to and including Pornography) are archetypal post-punk and not Goth at all

I definitely consider The Cure's original gloomy trilogy goth, and while Wire definitely weren't, at the same time I included 'I Should Have Known Better' because it almost sounds like a template most of the baritone goth groups would follow for years to come.

[buzby]

From the Joy Division canon, I'd add In a Lonely Place (12"). Technically, this and Ceremony were written as JD songs in 1979-80, but only published as New Order (hence Barney on vocals in this version). I think it counts as proto-Goth. Moving in context, but possessed of a somewhat pompous, declamatory style, rhythm and synths at the forefront.

It was recorded by New Order, but still credited as written by Joy Division and published by Joy Division's company Fractured Music. All subsequent New Order releases were published by their company Be Music until the Republic era, when they formed CentreDate (which coincided with Bernard's increased royalty percentage for doing the bulk of the writing).

The interesting thing about Ceremony and IALP was that they are not really Ian's words. They had only played Ceremony live once before his death and as neither track had yet been properly recorded Ian had not submitted a copy of the lyrics for for publishing. When the remaining members decided to record them, they asked Debbie Curtis if they could look through his lyrics file but there were no complete lyrics for either song there, so they only had murky rehearsal tapes (Ian never properly sang at rehearsals, usually mumbling fragments of lyrics from his folder and notebooks until he found something that fitted) and the live recording of Ceremony to decipher the lyrics.

The lyrics as recorded by New Order became very much a 'best guess' as to what he was singing, and in some cases aren't very close at all to what can be deciphered (this is the best of the three recordings of Ceremony they had, the IALP recordings are far worse). However, the first demo version New Order recorded at the Western Works session with Morris & Hook sharing the vocals is a lot closer to Curtis' lyrics, so there must have been some rewriting that took place before they eventually recorded them with Hannett.

[Fishfinger]

^ Thank you, that is wonderful.

[wosl]

Another New Order that gives off a waft of goth is the instrumental Elegia.  Depeche Mode's Waiting For The Night is a nice slice of electro-goth.  A decent dollop of Slowdive's first album might (un)reasonably be filed under the sub-genre 'shoegoth', e.g.

[Johnny Yesno]

I'm now Facebook friends with Gilmartin so I won't have a word said against him. We have quite a few mutuals so I thought I'd send him a request and he accepted. He probably doesn't have a clue who I am (or indeed was) but he posts quite a bit of archive stuff and I agree he is a great drummer. From what I've read, the recent split seems like six of one and half a dozen of the other, but I could be wrong.

As for Rawlings he seemed like an okay bloke. But me and my mate Brendan were basically 17-year-olds trying to get in with the cool set (most of whom were only three or four years older than us) and failing miserably. His 'what the fuck are you doing here?' came when we were hanging around after the Birmingham gig hoping to get invited backstage. Which we weren't.

My favourite memory of him is seeing him absolutely bladdered coming out of the Leadmill one night with Tim the bassist basically having to hold him up. He was going: 'Tim, I really want a girlfriend. Why can't I get a girlfriend?' He obviously hadn't learned at that point that women only go for good-looking men...

Have you ever seen their first ever TV performance? I think the image needed working on a bit. Incidentally, one of the keyboardists is Paul 'Bee' Hampshire, who went on to form Getting The Fear and another band with the word 'the' in the middle (Chasing The Dragon?) and is friends with an old friend of mine in London who seems to have absolutely no idea about his previous life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MEY-r7_y8Yw

Excellent post, thanks. It's not looking good for Rawlings that he didn't invite you backstage after travelling that far to see them. I'm going off him now. Perhaps that's why he couldn't get a girlfriend (joking aside, that's astonishing, quite frankly).

Also, thanks for posting the video. I'd not heard that song before. Interesting costume :-)

[buzby]

Another New Order that gives off a waft of goth is the instrumental Elegia.

It was their (mostly Steve & Gilllian) first gambit as aspiring soundtrack composers (best experienced in the full 17-minute version, as long as you ignore the comments from tedious MGS fans). Also on Low Life was the Cure-baiting Sunrise, which also has the whiff of goth about it.

Steve & Gillian kept at it too, and for the B-side to Fine Time, the lead single off Technique, we got Don't Do It, with harpsichord, strings, a backward-masked Exorcist dialogue sample (alongside samples from the BBC adaptation of Alan Ayckbourn's Way Upstream) and a similar sound to what The Cure would put out later in the year on Disintegration (for example, Lovesong)

[canadagoose]

It was their (mostly Steve & Gilllian) first gambit as aspiring soundtrack composers (best experienced in the full 17-minute version, as long as you ignore the comments from tedious MGS fans). Also on Low Life was the Cure-baiting Sunrise, which also has the whiff of goth about it.

Steve & Gillian kept at it too, and for the B-side to Fine Time, the lead single off Technique, we got Don't Do It, with harpsichord, strings, a backward-masked Exorcist dialogue sample (alongside samples from the BBC adaptation of Alan Ayckbourn's Way Upstream) and a similar sound to what The Cure would put out later in the year on Disintegration (for example, Lovesong)

I wasn't aware of that song (Don't Do It) - it's a good one, thanks. Seemingly not on Google Play Music which is disappointing. Do you know where it appears other than the Fine Time single itself? (B-side collections, etc.)?

edit: n/m, I can get it on YouTube Music so I can listen without having the video up!

[buzby]

I wasn't aware of that song (Don't Do It) - it's a good one, thanks. Seemingly not on Google Play Music which is disappointing. Do you know where it appears other than the Fine Time single itself? (B-side collections, etc.)?

Apart from the Fine Time single ,it's available on the bonus disc of the 2008 Collector's Edition remaster of Technique.

It's a particular favourite of mine. It took me nearly 20 years to put a name to the TV programme they sampled though (I watched it when it was broadcast, but couldn't remember what it was called by the 12 months after that Fine Time was released).

[Jockice]

Excellent post, thanks. It's not looking good for Rawlings that he didn't invite you backstage after travelling that far to see them. I'm going off him now. Perhaps that's why he couldn't get a girlfriend (joking aside, that's astonishing, quite frankly).

Also, thanks for posting the video. I'd not heard that song before. Interesting costume :-)

Ta. And here's Rawlings and Gilmartin's first released recording - the final track on a Sheffield compilation from 1980 (although according to the booklet that came with it, they were from Darton near Barnsley. I wish I still had the booklet. Theirs a haircuttastic picture of the band in it).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KQSKbPwjOI

I must have seen that Sink song when it was broadcast late at night on BBC 2 as part of their Futurama festival 1980 coverage but it didn't leave any impression on me and I didn't know they used to be Y? anyway. After this The Danse Society first came to my attention in early 82 when a couple of schoolmates went to see them play in a pub in Sheffield. They told me the day after that they were both going phooaaar when Rawlings appeared on stage until they realised that the object of their lust had a deep voice and no tits.

They also raved about the support band and on realising that they were playing again a few days later supporting another band (Artery) I thought I'd try my luck and go down (I was actually older than both mates but looked younger. 16 with the face and body of a 12-year-old). Much to my amazement I got in so saw my first ever pub gig. That support band's name - Pulp.

But I digress (again). Not getting backstage in Birmingham was one of the least surprising things that happened that night (we originally turned up at the wrong venue for a start, and then....) and I've been backstage with several bands since. It's not as exciting as you may think. Sweaty musicians, earnest fanzine writers and possibly a few girls who want to talk to the band  and nobody who isn't the band. If you're lucky you may get a can of beer out of it or watch the band pass a joint around without offering you it. And that's on a good night.

Does Gary Numan count as goth in any way? Because I have a great story about the backstage party after one of his gigs. I've probably told it before but it is one of my favourite anecdotes of all time.

[Jockice]

PS This is what Rawlings looked like not all that long ago. A goth/casual crossover. I'm presuming he's not the one on the right.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P63OHJcxw5g

[BRen]

No Christian Death?

Quite influential in terms of the Goth scene and 'Death Rock'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCqaXfFJD9c

[Avril Lavigne]

Everyday is Halloween by Ministry:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFPI9b9N6CQ

AND

End Credits Theme from Duckula:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OmIRwexAcbg

[buzby]

No Christian Death?

Quite influential in terms of the Goth scene and 'Death Rock'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCqaXfFJD9c

Freek Kinkelaar, a Belgian musician who writes for Record Collector was obsessed with them. I remember reading a massively in-depth article when I used to read it as a teenager about the band's history and the coup by Valor Kand to gradually force out all the original members (very much an LA Goth scene David Van Day). It would be decades before I actually heard what they sounded like. A bit too 'try-hard' for me I'm afraid. The original vocalist Rozz Willams also wasn't afraid of using the old Nazi imagery in his post-CD projects either.

[Johnny Yesno]

Ta. And here's Rawlings and Gilmartin's first released recording - the final track on a Sheffield compilation from 1980 (although according to the booklet that came with it, they were from Darton near Barnsley. I wish I still had the booklet. Theirs a haircuttastic picture of the band in it).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KQSKbPwjOI

That's a great bit of psych punk, there. Shame the vocals let it down a bit. Sounds like Rawlings is still the lad in the Hallowe'en costume at that point.

I must have seen that Sink song when it was broadcast late at night on BBC 2 as part of their Futurama festival 1980 coverage but it didn't leave any impression on me and I didn't know they used to be Y? anyway. After this The Danse Society first came to my attention in early 82 when a couple of schoolmates went to see them play in a pub in Sheffield. They told me the day after that they were both going phooaaar when Rawlings appeared on stage until they realised that the object of their lust had a deep voice and no tits.

Haha!

PS This is what Rawlings looked like not all that long ago. A goth/casual crossover. I'm presuming he's not the one on the right.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P63OHJcxw5g

Ha, yes, isn't the one on the right Gilmartin? Pretty sure the other longhair is the keyboard player.

I'm not one for the digging up of the rotting corpses of old bands but that track's pretty good, actually. Also, I'm sceptical about the singer being an essential part of any act, more essential than the other musicians anyway. However, this recording does sound complete with him on it, and it's a shame he bailed.

I have to say, this thread has really delivered for me.

Does Gary Numan count as goth in any way? Because I have a great story about the backstage party after one of his gigs. I've probably told it before but it is one of my favourite anecdotes of all time.

He does now. Spill!

[Pseudopath]

Fields of the Nephilim - Last Exit for the Lost:
https://youtu.be/K3cbKEwGxRk

Bauhaus - Who Killed Mr Moonlight: https://youtu.be/cjEj-8PerIs

[DukeDeMondo]

Is it time to mention Goths by the Mountain Goats? I think it is. Absolutely gorgeous record. Gorgeous, now. All about the goths.

My favourite track is the one about Andrew Eldritch out Sisters Of Mercy.

"Andrew Eldritch Is Moving Back To Leeds"

Just wonderful.

"Nobody ever gets away,
Even the best of us come back some day..."

[Dr Rock]

Fields of the Nephilim - Last Exit for the Lost:
https://youtu.be/K3cbKEwGxRk

Bauhaus - Who Killed Mr Moonlight: https://youtu.be/cjEj-8PerIs

Good picks. I think the reason I never cared for The Cure, even though I did listen to them a fair bit, is that Robert Smith is not sexy. I like my goth to have some sexy grim bastard up front, preferably wearing a hat, like The Sisters or The Neph. Dave Vanian, Siouxsie Sioux, most of Bauhaus (especially Daniel Ash), they've all got it.

Here's that Sisters track, Long Train (b-side of Lucretia My Reflection). I like driving my car to this

https://youtu.be/4Yq_iU22M-U

[Johnny Yesno]

I think the reason I never cared for The Cure, even though I did listen to them a fair bit, is that Robert Smith is not sexy. I like my goth to have some sexy grim bastard up front, preferably wearing a hat

Doc, I am disappoint.

Thread is Best Goth Songs. Not Best Goth Hats.

[Goldentony]

Not a goth expert or a goth, but I want to nominate this Live on TV version of Cold by The Cure -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fhSwoQikzvg

[Jockice]

That's a great bit of psych punk, there. Shame the vocals let it down a bit. Sounds like Rawlings is still the lad in the Hallowe'en costume at that point.

Haha!

Ha, yes, isn't the one on the right Gilmartin? Pretty sure the other longhair is the keyboard player.

I'm not one for the digging up of the rotting corpses of old bands but that track's pretty good, actually. Also, I'm sceptical about the singer being an essential part of any act, more essential than the other musicians anyway. However, this recording does sound complete with him on it, and it's a shame he bailed.

I have to say, this thread has really delivered for me.

He does now. Spill!

I loved Bouquet Of Steel, the album with Y? on. For someone who was too young to get in pubs to see any of these bands it gave me a great taste of the Sheffield (and I suppose Darton) music scene at the time. I did see the Flying Alphonso Brothers play in a tent on a shopping precinct, Artery at that pub gig and am now actually friends with one of I'm So Hollow, still my favourite Sheffield band ever. The only person on it who actually became famous though was one of the Musical Janeens, who ended up being a member of the Human League when they were at their biggest.

But I digress. Again. Gilmartin's the one with his arm round Rawlings in the photo. The others are the guitarist Paul Nash (ie, not the one I'm Facebook friends with) and (I presume) Dave Whitaker, who joined the band when their original keyboardist left after Heaven Is Waiting. He was previously in a Leeds band called Music For Pleasure who I had a couple of singles by. They weren't goths though. Sort of electropop. That track is good actually. There are various live versions of it on youtube as well, with Steve replaced by a bloke called Brian from a long-standing Barnsley heavy metal band called Seventh Son. It's just not the same though. I agree with you, Rawlings just had something irreplaceable.

As for the Numan story. I might as well tell you the whole thing to put it in context. At the time I was doing music stuff for the local paper in Sheffield so went to quite a few concerts.

Around this time I'd become mates with a new colleague. He had a glamorous girlfriend who lived in another town. He went to stay with her for a long weekend. She popped out to the shops so he picked up one of her magazines to read. Something fell out. A letter from her bit on the side. Which according to legend contained something about her in jodphurs.

He returned home heartbroken. The first I heard about it was on Monday evening when he phoned me up crying and wanting to go out and drown his sorrows. Now that evening was a rarity for me as I was actually going out on a date. Well sort of. I'd been to school with her but hadn't seen her for years. So I told him I wouldn't be able to do tonight as I was taking a girl out. His reply? 'Can I come?' Er, let me think about this one...

However after that he wanted to go out every night, often straight after work. He didn't really know anyone else at the paper so it was me every time. For about a month. He was seriously on the piss and most nights would end up crying. At one point I phoned in sick just so I could avoid him for a couple of days.

Now during this time I was reviewing a Numan show at the City Hall. I took him and a couple of songs in it was like a lightbulb above his head and he went: 'Hey, you can get backstage here, can't you?' Er possibly. Why? 'There'll be a big party afterwards. Let's go to it!'' Mate, it's Gary Numan not The Rolling Stones you know. 'But I've read about these things. Booze, drugs, girls.' Etc etc. For the whole concert.

After the show we popped out to a pub across the road and he was still going on about this bloody party. So eventually I caved in, we went back to the venue, talked ourselves backstage and approached the room where bands usually socialised (I'd been there before you know.) I knocked the door, a female voice said 'come in' so we entered the room to see....

...a middle-aged woman and a table with a bowl of fruit on it. That was it. Literally nothing else. 'Hi. We're looking for Gary,' I managed to say. 'Oh, he's gone back to the hotel to go to bed,'' she replied. 'I'm his mum Beryl.'' she continued. ''Do you lads want some fruit? I'll have to throw it out otherwise.''

So that was the great rock'n'roll (or synthpop) party that ***** was genuinely expecting to attend. Eating a banana while having a chat with Gary Numan's mum in an otherwise deserted room. Actually Beryl was lovely. She used to do all his press so I'd spoken to her on the phone but had never met her before. She even gave us each a bag of fruit to take home with us. It was a crazy, crazy, crazy night.

[Johnny Yesno]

I loved Bouquet Of Steel, the album with Y? on. For someone who was too young to get in pubs to see any of these bands it gave me a great taste of the Sheffield (and I suppose Darton) music scene at the time. I did see the Flying Alphonso Brothers play in a tent on a shopping precinct, Artery at that pub gig and am now actually friends with one of I'm So Hollow, still my favourite Sheffield band ever. The only person on it who actually became famous though was one of the Musical Janeens, who ended up being a member of the Human League when they were at their biggest.

I'll have to do some googling of those names. I've vaguely heard of Artery and I'm So Hollow. Can't think from where, though.

But I digress. Again. Gilmartin's the one with his arm round Rawlings in the photo. The others are the guitarist Paul Nash (ie, not the one I'm Facebook friends with) and (I presume) Dave Whitaker, who joined the band when their original keyboardist left after Heaven Is Waiting. He was previously in a Leeds band called Music For Pleasure who I had a couple of singles by. They weren't goths though. Sort of electropop.

Is the hair guy Paul Nash or the bald guy? Hair guy looks like he could plausibly be the one second from the back in this picture:

That track is good actually. There are various live versions of it on youtube as well, with Steve replaced by a bloke called Brian from a long-standing Barnsley heavy metal band called Seventh Son. It's just not the same though. I agree with you, Rawlings just had something irreplaceable.

Ah, now I've seen one of those videos of Brian singing for TDS. Oof! It was toe curling. The goth lady was an actual improvement, to my mind.

As for the Numan story. I might as well tell you the whole thing to put it in context. At the time I was doing music stuff for the local paper in Sheffield so went to quite a few concerts.

Around this time I'd become mates with a new colleague. He had a glamorous girlfriend who lived in another town. He went to stay with her for a long weekend. She popped out to the shops so he picked up one of her magazines to read. Something fell out. A letter from her bit on the side. Which according to legend contained something about her in jodphurs.

He returned home heartbroken. The first I heard about it was on Monday evening when he phoned me up crying and wanting to go out and drown his sorrows. Now that evening was a rarity for me as I was actually going out on a date. Well sort of. I'd been to school with her but hadn't seen her for years. So I told him I wouldn't be able to do tonight as I was taking a girl out. His reply? 'Can I come?' Er, let me think about this one...

However after that he wanted to go out every night, often straight after work. He didn't really know anyone else at the paper so it was me every time. For about a month. He was seriously on the piss and most nights would end up crying. At one point I phoned in sick just so I could avoid him for a couple of days.

Now during this time I was reviewing a Numan show at the City Hall. I took him and a couple of songs in it was like a lightbulb above his head and he went: 'Hey, you can get backstage here, can't you?' Er possibly. Why? 'There'll be a big party afterwards. Let's go to it!'' Mate, it's Gary Numan not The Rolling Stones you know. 'But I've read about these things. Booze, drugs, girls.' Etc etc. For the whole concert.

After the show we popped out to a pub across the road and he was still going on about this bloody party. So eventually I caved in, we went back to the venue, talked ourselves backstage and approached the room where bands usually socialised (I'd been there before you know.) I knocked the door, a female voice said 'come in' so we entered the room to see....

...a middle-aged woman and a table with a bowl of fruit on it. That was it. Literally nothing else. 'Hi. We're looking for Gary,' I managed to say. 'Oh, he's gone back to the hotel to go to bed,'' she replied. 'I'm his mum Beryl.'' she continued. ''Do you lads want some fruit? I'll have to throw it out otherwise.''

So that was the great rock'n'roll (or synthpop) party that ***** was genuinely expecting to attend. Eating a banana while having a chat with Gary Numan's mum in an otherwise deserted room. Actually Beryl was lovely. She used to do all his press so I'd spoken to her on the phone but had never met her before. She even gave us each a bag of fruit to take home with us. It was a crazy, crazy, crazy night.

Hahaha! You didn't disappoint. Did I ever mention I once had tea with Hazel O'Connor's mum? Well, I didn't have tea because I don't like tea. I watched Hazel O'Connor's mum have some tea. Get me.

[Johnny Yesno]

Yep, Brian's the guy.

Danse Society [Polish Club, 27 March 2015]: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iAtFHWg4-P8

Actually, he seems to have toned down the rawk by this point.

[Jockice]

I'll have to do some googling of those names. I've vaguely heard of Artery and I'm So Hollow. Can't think from where, though.

Is the hair guy Paul Nash or the bald guy? Hair guy looks like he could plausibly be the one second from the back in this picture:



Ah, now I've seen one of those videos of Brian singing for TDS. Oof! It was toe curling. The goth lady was an actual improvement, to my mind.

Hahaha! You didn't disappoint. Did I ever mention I once had tea with Hazel O'Connor's mum? Well, I didn't have tea because I don't like tea. I watched Hazel O'Connor's mum have some tea. Get me.

Probably from me. Obscure Sheffield bands from the late 70s/early 80s is one of my specialist subjects.

Paul Nash is the one with the hair. The one at the back is original keyboard player Lyndon Scarfe. What sort of name is that though? Bet his schooldays were fun. I always used to get those two mixed up though so I could be wrong.

Seventh Son have been knocking around for about 40 years without ever getting anywhere. They were originally seen as rivals to Def Leppard and Saxon. NWOBHM or whatever it was called.  I think he's still in Seventh Son though and was just Danse Societying part time or as a favour or something.

How did Mrs O'Connor take her tea then? Incidentally, a few years later I went to see Numan again at the same venue and this time there was a do afterwards. Not a particularly exciting one mind but there was more than a bowl of fruit on offer.

[Johnny Yesno]

Probably from me. Obscure Sheffield bands from the late 70s/early 80s is one of my specialist subjects.

Well, I applaud this. Long time fan of the work of Cabaret Voltaire myself. Their studio, Western Works, was mentioned in connection with New Order upthread.

Paul Nash is the one with the hair. The one at the back is original keyboard player Lyndon Scarfe. What sort of name is that though? Bet his schooldays were fun. I always used to get those two mixed up though so I could be wrong.

Ah, of course. It's the kind of name to get you bullied into being a synth nerd in an excellent goth band.

Seventh Son have been knocking around for about 40 years without ever getting anywhere. They were originally seen as rivals to Def Leppard and Saxon. NWOBHM or whatever it was called.  I think he's still in Seventh Son though and was just Danse Societying part time or as a favour or something.

I see that other singer with the beard has also left. I don't think his likeness to Rawlings was 'uncanny', as their website suggests but he sounds alright in the videos of them live.

How did Mrs O'Connor take her tea then?

One teabag, milk. I can't remember how many sugars, though. It was too long ago.

Incidentally, a few years later I went to see Numan again at the same venue and this time there was a do afterwards. Not a particularly exciting one mind but there was more than a bowl of fruit on offer.

All's well that ends well.

The way you set up the story, I thought you were going to say that you opened the door and it turned out the female voice belonged to your friend's ex. Who was in the middle of being banged by Gary Numan. The bowl of fruit was a relief to this reader.

[Jockice]

Actually, she was getting banged by Mrs Numan using a banana as a strap-on...

[Johnny Yesno]

If that was true, you'd never have to buy yourself a drink ever again.