Grave Soon (Probably)

[Konki]

Not eaten anything all day.

Too hungover to get out of bed.

Bereft and starving.

Grave soon?

[imitationleather]

If anything it'll probably do you good.

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

I'd start digging if I were you, grave boy.

[grassbath]

Eat something carby, greasy but inoffensive. Chips are a good option. This will mitigate your hangover symptoms by at least 30-40%.

[Konki]

Good idea. Bring me chips, yeah?

[Rolf Lundgren]

You've had a good innings.

[imitationleather]

Probably time to have a really good think about whether or not you've wasted your life.

[pancreas]

Good. I am glad you will soon be dead.

[grassbath]

Good idea. Bring me chips, yeah?

No, I'm busy being up and about and productive you see.

[Chollis]

Gravitating towards grave

[Konki]

Really need a piss.

[Paul Calf]

Piss away. It's mainly water anyway.

[Konki]

Can you eat quilt?

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

Can you eat quilt?

I wouldn't. Imagine all the stray globules of spunk that have ended up on it.

[Cloud]

Can you eat quilt?

No, but I know a few pillow biters...

[Konki]

Just done a sick into a pair of jeans. Not long left now.

[Jasha]

No age

[Attila]

Not eaten anything all day.

Too hungover to get out of bed.

Bereft and starving.

Grave soon?

Get hold of Richard Matheson's fine novel on the subject Hunger and Thirst.

[seepage]

^ or better still, get hold of a mattessons smoked sausage. microwave a punnet of baked beans. sorted.

[Konki]

Please come and push a sausage into my face.

[Konki]

Please.

[mothman]

With the angles soon.

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

I'd go back to sleep if I were you. Today has been a proper write off and no mistake. Tomorrow I expect great things from you.

[Sherringford Hovis]

Had the pleasure of meeting Konki at a charity do once. He was surprisingly down to earth, and VERY funny.

[dallasman]

Can you eat quilt?

Ha ha, I read that as "can you eat quiet?", and I was about to say "no you can't, not chips". Then I thought, "oh, 'can you eat the quiet', like, 'can you eat silence'?" Well, that damn near blew my head clean off my shoulders. Heh. But quilt, of course not. Even the cat knows that, and the cat eats plastic bags, right in front of me.

To tell you the truth, Konki, I had a feeling you weren't long for this earth when I first saw your username. In my country, "konk" is short for "konkurs", which means "bankrupt", but is also used about failing engines and such, mostly as a verb. "My car konka on the E18", you'd say. Or, "the laser printer konka, call IT". Somone identified as "Konki" would be flagged as prone to malfunction, so, as I said, I'm not the least bit surprised you are dying. I hope you're comfortable, though, and that someone sees their way to deliver you some chips. And you should munch on those bad boys with abandon, as loudly as you please.

Safe travels, and PS: I love your avatar! Too bad you'll miss out on the hologram tour.

[Anagram of a Shit Name]

Over 3 and a half hours since his last post.

Dead now

RIP

[Konki]

To tell you the truth, Konki, I had a feeling you weren't long for this earth when I first saw your username. In my country, "konk" is short for "konkurs", which means "bankrupt", but is also used about failing engines and such, mostly as a verb. "My car konka on the E18", you'd say. Or, "the laser printer konka, call IT". Somone identified as "Konki" would be flagged as prone to malfunction, so, as I said, I'm not the least bit surprised you are dying.

It's some comfort knowing this is merely destiny, thank you. Still hanging on in there. Even managed to get out of bed briefly to empty my guts down the pan.

[Anagram of a Shit Name]

He has risen again!

Not dead.