Feeling like an absolute piece of shit.

[tookish]

I've missed my meds for a few days. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Taken them now, but the thoughts are swirling.
And I've cut my arms for the first time in months.

I'm a useless piece of shit.

Sorry. Sorry.

I'm safe, and all. Just alone, and feeling fucked up.

[Glebe]

Oh Tookie... please look after yourself. You might feel like shit, but you have no reason to think that you're useless.

I hope you're feeling a bit better now... hugs and that.

[QDRPHNC]

You're not a useless piece of shit. The part of your head telling you you are is actually the piece of shit. Tell it to fuck off.

[bgmnts]

Why did you miss your meds?

Anyway, get well soon!

[zomgmouse]

You're not a piece of shit.

You might feel like a piece of shit and your brain might be telling you that you're a piece of shit, but you are not a piece of shit.

Think how well you've been doing globally; this is just one small sad instance in a bigger stream of greatness.

Sending loads of love your way.

[VelourSpirit]

Hate that helpless feeling when you're reminded that you're barely in control of your own mood. I know that I'm in a bad way my mind wouldn't accept anything positive, but keep trying to remember that the feeling has passed before and it'll pass again, and that you're definitely not actually a piece of shit.

[bgmnts]

I went for a quarter to five walk to the garage to get chips. My mood.

[Buelligan]

You are so not a piece of shit tooks.  Hope today is a good one for you and all of us.  It's looking like a ruddy beauty from here.  I hug you.

[tookish]

Sorry everyone. Was in a right downer. Wish I hadn't posted here, but thanks for all the love. <3

[pancreas]

If you'd like some counselling, I've got a new riding crop.

[Buelligan]

Sorry everyone. Was in a right downer. Wish I hadn't posted here, but thanks for all the love. <3

You got that love all the time, baby.

[Absorb the anus burn]

One of the best posters..... Please stay on top of your meds and talk to a GP if you start self-harming.

[vic spanner]

Glad you're feeling better tookish.

I often miss my meds too, it's common, and although it makes things difficult you just have to try to remember that the feelings pass - and most importantly, not blame yourself for something that is absolutely human. The same goes for self harm, the feelings and the cuts fade in time.

Thinking of you.

[Blue Jam]

Tookish, you're lovely, look after yourself xxx

Here I've been back on the ol' Prozac after another of my recurring bouts of depression- I started getting dark thoughts, dwelling on bad memories of my awful family, getting feelings of despair and struggling to cope with the increased workload and extra stresses of my job right now. After a few weeks on it I started to feel back to my old self again, able to ignore my problems and pack those dark thoughts away, but this week they've been creeping back in. I'm wondering if it's because I missed a few doses when I was ill recently, but it wasn't that many, so maybe I need a higher dose, or a different drug altogether, and that would be a pain as it took a few goes to find the "right" antidepressant for me in the first place...

...anyway, after my GP told me that new evidence suggests that two whole years on Prozac (rather than my usual 3-6 months) may stop the recurrences and see off the depression for good, I was feeling pretty optimistic, and now I'm feeling rubbish again. I just wish my mind wasn't so crap and broken and fragile and unable to cope with things...

[St_Eddie]

I'm very saddened to read this, tookish.  Please try to ensure that you take your medication in the future and also try to make a promise to yourself not to cut your body again.  I've been there myself and it's not the answer.

I hope that you feel better soon.  All the best.

[Blue Jam]

Jeez, that was a whiny post above, sorry. I've only been back on the Prozac for a month, and it's supposed to take 4-8 weeks to work, and I missed a few doses during that week when I was ill. I should probably just give it more time- and set a daily pill alarm...

Glad things have improved Tookish, take care of yourself- and set a pill alarm... xxx

[Glebe]

Jeez, that was a whiny post above, sorry. I've only been back on the Prozac for a month, and it's supposed to take 4-8 weeks to work, and I missed a few doses during that week when I was ill. I should probably just give it more time- and set a daily pill alarm...

Glad things have improved Tookish, take care of yourself- and set a pill alarm... xxx

Not whiny at all Blue Jam, just telling it how it is. Hope you're feeling a little better now too.

[Pingers]

Jeez, that was a whiny post above, sorry. I've only been back on the Prozac for a month, and it's supposed to take 4-8 weeks to work, and I missed a few doses during that week when I was ill. I should probably just give it more time- and set a daily pill alarm...

Glad things have improved Tookish, take care of yourself- and set a pill alarm... xxx

I've noticed with a few people, myself included, that getting a physical illness often seems to put one in reverse. My theory is that because it brings tiredness, it does what tiredness usually does, i.e. gives the irrational bit of one's brain a free run because the rational bit that knows you are an alright person can't summon the energy to boss it around and counter its ridiculous ideas. Similar to being half awake at 3 a.m. when a lot of us do our worst thinking

I think physical illness can also set one's thinking back into a default pattern that's not helpful and it can be important to keep an eye out for that when getting over an illness

I am sending you all the most positive feelings I can through a wall of snot xx

[Twed]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AU_L9CBm2yk

[alan nagsworth]

Could be worse, mate. You could be an Absolut piece of shit. One of those cunts in the marketing department incorporating the Pride flag into their media again this month. Imagine being them.

Probably get a lot of free vodka though so not all bad I guess.

[madhair60]

Feel you on this. Yesterday I was the cock of the walk and now seemingly everyone on here hates me and openly wishes for my painful death. Fickle CaB indeed but I should have known that the malice previously directed at the likes of [banned troll] (an autistic man) would ultimately be directed towards me. You'll vote Labour and feign empathy while stamping on the metaphorical ribs of the undeserving just to give yourselves that little moment of power, that feeling of superiority. Well, I think it's unacceptable and not on.

[Pingers]

Feel you on this. Yesterday I was the cock of the walk and now seemingly everyone on here hates me and openly wishes for my painful death. Fickle CaB indeed but I should have known that the malice previously directed at the likes of [banned troll] (an autistic man) would ultimately be directed towards me. You'll vote Labour and feign empathy while stamping on the metaphorical ribs of the undeserving just to give yourselves that little moment of power, that feeling of superiority. Well, I think it's unacceptable and not on.

Who's been giving you that shit? Long may you prevail as far as I'm concerned.

[pancreas]

Who's been giving you that shit? Long may you prevail as far as I'm concerned.

I disagree. He is rapidly running out of road. We will soon need to avert our gaze.

[Danger Man]

Yesterday I was the cock of the walk and now seemingly everyone on here hates me and openly wishes for my painful death. Fickle CaB indeed but I should have known that the malice previously directed at the likes of [banned troll] (an autistic man) would ultimately be directed towards me.

Fuck off. I'm currently the most disliked on here.

"For everything to be consummated, for me to feel less alone, I had only to wish that there be a large crowd of spectators the day of my execution and that they greet me with cries of hate."

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

Who's been giving you that shit? Long may you prevail as far as I'm concerned.

Computer nebs on the Technology board.

[Twed]

Feel you on this. Yesterday I was the cock of the walk and now seemingly everyone on here hates me and openly wishes for my painful death. Fickle CaB indeed but I should have known that the malice previously directed at the likes of [banned troll] (an autistic man) would ultimately be directed towards me. You'll vote Labour and feign empathy while stamping on the metaphorical ribs of the undeserving just to give yourselves that little moment of power, that feeling of superiority. Well, I think it's unacceptable and not on.

This is true (not the part about it being unacceptable, but the part about madhair60 being a fucking worm)

[Pingers]

Computer nebs on the Technology board.

What, the sort of people who get worked up about which device you play games on and which OS you're running? Safely ignored IMO

[The Boston Crab]

Better to be hated than simply ignored.

https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,73759.0.html

The cruellest act is to deny the existence of the other.

[Cerys]

Can I add my mighty Welsh arms to this massive communal tookish hugfest?  Because you're not a piece of shit.  I don't hug shit.  I haven't developed that fetish quite yet.

[madhair60]

This is true (not the part about it being unacceptable, but the part about madhair60 being a fucking worm)

Fucking unreal. Guess the left ARE capable of as much hate as - I'm not afraid to say it - a Nazi.