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Talk to Transformer - shockingly accurate neural network text predicting thingy

Started by Tikwid, June 21, 2019, 03:04:35 AM

Previous topic - Next topic
I'm a pink toothbrush fan and find this to be an excellent moisturiser, but it is definitely not moisturiser.

The robots might take over the world one day, but Max Bygraves can sleep easy in his bed tonight.

Mr Blobby on the other hand has become obsolete :(

blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby blobby bl

jenna appleseed

"I called myself a Wooblybooblysexual. But after that day I just couldn't tell you what sex was, because I never knew. You know, it's a basic concept, and as far as I know there's no disputing that. I don't know if what I was doing was illegal or not, so I can't say."

What your school says about you and your sexuality?

With respect to Kink, I can be 100% clear. For instance, you may not think that's cool, but maybe it's cool for another reason, not just because of consent. If it's okay for me to have sex and it's okay for someone else to have sex, that's my choice."

---
"I called myself a Wooblybooblysexual.'

A friend called him, as did Facebook. 'Because I had other hobbies I tried to keep it to myself. That was like 16 years ago.' He'd met his current partner, Greg "Crow" Marsh, on an internet dating site. 'We were just there for the first time. I didn't even have to tell him my girlfriend was trans.'

'You saw a transition happen? You tried to have a family?'

'Yeah.'

'You both told people about it?'

'Yeah. That's the thing about these things – you don't even realise how you started being trans until the other person tells you and you can't believe"

---

"I called myself a Wooblybooblysexual. However it was really painful, and I still have all the pains associated with that. I don't know why, I guess I'm really dedicated to things and not very good at things."
---

<Blimey, even talktotransformer continuing glinner has problems with beards>

"I called myself a Wooblybooblysexuality, I admit, in hopes of being seen as the sole victim of unwanted attention, the only gay person I know with a beard."

You know, the one with a beard, those small drooping ears, and the unique definition of gender.

At least he didn't write "I've so far been able to avoid any face-to-face contact or the vixenish online habits which have herculean strengths and failings. At the very least, the vulnerability and harassment that can erupt on social media have forced me to drive an extra 50 miles to my poetry readings." "

---

talk to transformer is very confused.

"I called myself a Wooblybooblysexual for years, and in doing so pretty much called myself a Shhhhhhhh, and when it's a man calling himself a man and liking women, it's called gender dysphoria and deeply painful.

I met George when I was 16 and he was 23, a big smile on his face as I raised the glass. I remember going home to my parents and making a big rainbow cake with his name on it. He was very supportive, loving, and really sweet. They're married now and have three boys, one of whom was now at college. We got to know each other better when he was in the Army, so he was there to give me advice and introduce me to people "

----
"I called myself a Wooblybooblysexual, and took to making jokes about people making other jokes about me, or at least it was believed I had done so, until I got fired," she said. "I've since been trying to establish myself as a social media nerd.

As an outlet for all this work, Wooblybooblyborhood is effectively the problem of the Internet. Its nature is problematic. It takes what can be a reasonably functional space—a hot spot of communication that can be owned—and makes it into a self-contained arena for chaos and violence, with a fanatical focus on trying to justify sexist or "

---
basketball heads?

"I called myself a Wooblybooblysexual. I'm like any other guy. I don't pick the girl up and bounce her around like a basketball, but I've never got one to tell me that we should stop doing what we're doing. It's almost like a pet, you know? It's a play thing and one has to give way for the other. If you lose control, you hurt them and if they fall into your lap, you love them. But you never get this, like a girlfriend or a wife or a mom.

As an adolescent, I didn't really do any of this because I had a gender identity disorder and an intellectual disability. I was a tomboy that mostly gave me grief. "

---
"I called myself a Wooblybooblysexual in a series of tweets last week:

If I need to make it clear, I am not attracted to women. And I really don't like the sound of that.

I don't particularly love all women either, but I do think there is more to life than men. I know it's hypocritical of me to say that about myself, but it's how I feel. I don't like the idea of thinking about things only in terms of their male parts — I just prefer to think about how things get into that zone in the first place.

Honestly, I have no clue what that means."

---

"I called myself a Wooblybooblysexual at one point in my life, and I still do, I do."

Wankbag explained that she has "evolved from an insecure sixteen-year-old who felt trapped to an assertive and confident twenty-something." She stated, "While I've always kept to myself, I felt that growing up is a really uncomfortable process, especially when you've never experienced what it's like to be in a relationship before."

At the beginning of the book, Wankbag highlights how her "excessive vaginal skin wasn't a problem at all," at 15. She stated that "looking at herself, I didn't think it was that big a deal," "

---

I called myself a Wooblybooblysexual

But I hate it, there are no sex stereotypes,

there's no dick pics, it's no phone vibrator.

7. You say you are polite and businesslike

But when I win, your judgment is wrong.

8. You are gregarious and chatty,

But you talk shit on all your friends and use emoji's.

9. You have lived overseas, but still act american.

When in Australia you speak french and talk to mrrrrrongelmen.

10. When you get a compliment it's worth 5 5 cents.

you say when an event with dota2


jenna appleseed

"Banned from twitter for an hour. Apparently broke some local bar rules.

Bill Callahan. Allowed to just walk around a Memorial Stadium parking lot in Minnesota (I want to stop using Minnesota instead) in a khaki vest and a T-shirt reading "I Hate America" because of his crazyness on twitter.

Dave Wannstedt. Literally basically a full-time douchebag at Cal (please ignore any names of Cal coaches past or present, i'm referring to this particular douchebag). Not banned from any sport, just blocked from everywhere and allowed to walk around.

Mike Leach. Allowed to just roam around a field at the center of a multiple-varsity field.

Brian Pol "

---
" I'm banned from twitter for a while and many people told me: 'Die' and sent thousands of meningitis C vaccines. Now they are attacking meningitis C vaccines. The truth is, it has nothing to do with your sex. They are not giving the same treatment to men as they give to women. Sorry for the insult to feminists!

Now there is a lot of problems in the world, like climate change, human trafficking and human fighting and less media coverage of women's rights but that is NOT MEN'S GENOCIDE? Or your argument that men's are generally also a victim of race. Your argument that men get a real rape culture, which is simply an an outright lie and very sad. And now a lot of people are "

---
I'm banned from twitter for saying you don't need to install windows 7 to be able to be an awesome nerd like me'.

I went on,

It would be simple to install the update so everyone can use a computer, software they're both happy to pay for. A bit less annoying for the millions of Windows users, it doesn't seem necessary to have all the info right in the first place, which tends to be why people do it. I couldn't imagine the same other alternative that is now illegal, something you can't make legally.

Then something happened. And I started rethinking.

The comments thread began to grow and grow. I saw people being accused of being an antivirus scum.

---
"I'm banned from twitter for this'.

The internet is like a nice warm bubble that lets people share their true thoughts. "
-
<me: yeah, no>
----

I'm banned from twitter for telling someone I was on the subway at 2:30 AM and she probably hates me. I had some soap when she was there and she must have thought it smelled. Besides that, I didn't want to talk about anything else. Don't know why, but it wasn't that important. Also, should I feel bad that I wasn't going to lunch with someone but I was actually sitting in a weird park eating some soup and then at 3:00 AM I have the fucked up feeling that something was wrong with me? Right before I woke up, I had a very high dose of 6 mg Abilify which isn't bad. I was supposed to do a response to the thread, but I was so worried

---
"I'm banned from twitter for spamming.)

PLEASE HELP!! My "Spycheck" app.

PLEASE HELP!! My "Spycheck" app.

APP REPLY TO

BE AN ACTUAL MEMBER

Who the fuck is this bitch?

Fuck you, Bob.

Her job is not to offer the time of day to see black and orange people in a unique way.

What the fuck am I doing on a job site that is going to spawn some fucking logo designer to mine for gold?

I'm not fucking thinking like a friggin' wide set lol.

Our country's issues are time frame to get the fuck out of here.

It's like people "

---
<talk to transformer is a terrorist now>

"I'm banned from twitter for telling everyone to shoot Trump. Got banned from twitter. Now i have to switch to googledrive."

ElTwopo

God save our gracious Queen!
Long live our noble Queen!
God save the Queen!
Send her victorious,
Happy and glorious,
Long to reign over us:
God save the Queen!

So, dark hags do come,
Love they do for the purpose
Of grasping money,
They lie in waiting,
With capes and fangs,
That suck the blood
Of their victims;
'Tis better to kill yourself
Than live in filthy sight
Of these villainous screechers.
And so it seems,
It is with guns that these villains
Begin to crack the daily cage
Of souls for the everlasting damned.

flotemysost

^ a beautiful improvement.


Stay alert, control the virus, or watch helplessly and in awe as the windows explode in your face and you pour blood and tears into a bucket – whatever you do, don't fall off."


Ooh ee ooh ah ah, ting ting, walla walla bing bang-boom, let's bang" sung in the luscious falsetto by a young gay man at an Ascot dinner party. Who could blame gay people for being nostalgic for these halcyon days when they ruled society.

When, six decades later, gay men and lesbians moved into a new, more equal society they discovered the beast they had hoped to slay in earlier times. On Saturday, as England celebrates Gay Pride, the widespread pain that gays endured for so many decades still haunts us.

What is most shocking about this week's Outfest is that this discussion has to take place – the public's continued obsession with homosexuality

Phil_A

Aw, it was fun while it lasted.

QuoteSad news...
I can no longer afford to run Talk to Transformer without revenue. A better version is available in my recently launched (paid) product, called InferKit. It's the same text generator with more configurability.

It's been amazing to see this site reach millions of people around the world. Unfortunately, this is expensive. In spite of cost optimizations, the site has drawn almost $20,000 out of my pocket, due to the computational requirements of large neural networks.

I'd like to be able to bring this site back in a similar form and upgrade to a bigger, smarter neural network. But for this I need InferKit to work out, soon.

If you enjoyed this site, please consider supporting me by trying out and sharing the paid version. The future of both sites depends on your help.

—Adam (@AdamDanielKing)

jenna appleseed

R.I.P Talk To Transformer, Long Live Text Synth
http://textsynth.org/

Started with the bit in bold then kept pressing the more button.
(Poor left out Ringo)


"Which Beatles have died? It's like we're all waiting for the apocalypse," writes John, "but there's only gonna be one or two or three to come."

The Beatles are still going strong. They are still alive. We can't let them go. There's always a new album coming, but I don't think it's going to be this one. I don't think there will be a new album with them or any of them. I don't think we're going to see anything else coming from them. I think they've reached what they're capable of. They've gone to another level. They're the kings. We could go on for pages.

John Lennon and George Harrison were in such good shape, they could probably play guitar. They were just as good as anybody else, and they would have been playing with Paul, who has been playing with them for years and years. And George, and Paul and John, and the rest, have been playing with them all along.

There's never been a Beatles album since the Beatles released the Beatles album "Let It Be", and I think it's gonna be a very different thing if there's never been a Beatles studio album. I think, if there's ever been a Beatles album, it's gonna be a studio album for them, and they're going to be on it. So I think they're doing very well.

Let it Be and "Let It Be", they were in a band together for three hours and two minutes. Let it Be was on the same day as "A Hard Day's Night", "The Beatles Have Been Dead For 23 Years" and "Yesterday", which were the only two Beatles to have ever had the same title.

Now, that was only the three of them. And "Let It Be" had been out a little less than five months, and it was a very different album from all the ones they had done that year. I think that's why they did that album so differently. The Beatles have never had any other studio albums for four or five months, never had a studio album this long. They had been playing in studios and at clubs and in their own houses and on television sets since '66, and they've never got to do another studio album. I think when, after the next big album, they'll get back on TV and have a big studio record and a studio album this big, and they'll do it all again. I think they're gonna make a record of this, and maybe get on their own big studio album. I think they're going to do it in four or five years.

It would be the next Beatles record if it were not for this one. It'd be a new album, but that's the way it'd be. I think the next album, the studio album I've seen them do, is going to be a different album from the previous two ones, because it will be the most famous album "

jenna appleseed

Text Synth strikes again

The Beach Boys - Pet Sounds
Brian Wilson Present Smile

Miles Davis Presents The Beach Boys - Pet Sounds
Brian Wilson presents Smile
Carry On - The Beach Boys - Pet Sounds
Snoop Dogg Presents The Beach Boys - Pet Sounds
The Beach Boys - I Wanna Be Your Dog
Snoop Dogg presents Smile
Miles Davis presents The Beach Boys - Pet Sounds
Snoop Dogg - I Wanna Be Your Dog
The Beach Boys - I Wanna Be Your Dog (C)

---

imaginary song lyrics

" Brian Wilson Presents Smile

The first song from this song is "I'm a little bit afraid" by The Who

Skipping the next song is a nice way of introducing you to the song: "I'm a little bit afraid that I'm scared/I'm a little bit scared I'm scared/I'm scared that I'm scared/"

You are a little bit frightened for some reason,

You're scared of nothing so much

I'm scared of you too,
But you look like a happy person.
You're so happy for me.

If you're scared/if you're scared/if you're scared/If you're scared/your fear makes you crazy.
What's the difference between a happy child and a crazy child?
When you're scared, you know it's your fear that you're afraid.

Your fear makes you so confused,
You can't understand why it doesn't happen in this moment
So much fear makes you so scared of everything.
It feels so real to be afraid.
You think you're so safe,
But then you feel scared.

But you're scared of everything,
So you go through it like you've never been scared,
You're afraid like never before.
You're scared of everything and everyone.
What do people think of when they're scared?
You're scared to death,
And they're scared of nothing so much.
They think you're so happy you're afraid,
You've never been so scared for a parent. "

---
Brian Wilson Presents Smile %u2013

Sitting in the back seat of a car.
A lot of time on a hot day.
You're going to make the most of the things that you have left.
So don't let that go by without making some memories
Of places that you love.

Sitting in the back seat of a car.

And sometimes you'll be in a car
That's full of people,
And there's not many things left to do.
You've only got that in your pocket.
So grab your wallet and your watch.
And make some memories of that.

Ohhh yeah! I don't want to do any of that,
But if you don't stop, there'll be one more person around,
That'll be you, and he'll always be there
Ohhh yeah! I don't want to do any of that,
But if you don't stop, there'll be one more person around "

----

"Brian Wilson Presents Smile & Light:

Lights are great for a light. The sun makes it more bright. But if you need that kind of light, then you have got to give them a go. That way you don't have to deal with the dark. I have seen people that spend an hour and get tired of their day. They want more energy out there because they can see more. So you have got to give them lights. "

jenna appleseed

Text synth just spat out the name Barry Van Halen.

---

eta:

"legend garynd.

Gar yn garn: A short sword in one hand. See Gar yn-Garn.
Garnyn garn: A short sword.
Garnys garnys: A short sword.
Garnyng garnys: A short sword.
Garnys garyng: A short sword.
Garnys garynd: A short sword.
Garnys garyn: A short"

"legend Gary and Pubes Dazell and their baby were born:

And here's the first photo. It's from the second day. I've cropped everything to show you the details of the baby's face.

This is the third photo. It's from the second day. I've cropped everything so the hair is easier to see.

And here's the third photo. It's from the third day. You've got the front, front, front and back of the baby."

---
" legend Gary and Pubes Dazle in the video below!

Watch more of these adorable videos here:
More videos of these adorable babes below:

These are not the kind of people I would want to be a father to!

The next time you have a kid, don't leave it to them to decide what they think of their parents! Make sure they do not get any toys from mom! "

---
<not quite erotica and weirdly obsessed with toilets>

"legend Gary and Pubes Daz go to town on a few different different occasions, but it was the second where they actually went to the bathroom. So, this time I was actually able to see Gary and the pubes on their own, which I didn't see the first time we both went at the same time. Gary got on the toilet in the bathroom, I had to wait for the toilet to dry before we could enter the toilet together. But, it wasn't that hard. This is when I had to get out of the bathroom and move the bed back as if we weren't going there together. Gary, when I went to the toilet, told me about the first time he went to the toilet and the second time he went to it, which was when he had to get out as well. This is when he was asking me if I needed anything and if I needed help. At the end of that second time, I had to move the bed to see if I could get it out. But, it was difficult, as I was sitting on the end of the bed, my knees were not touching the end of the bed, I couldn't get my legs to move off the end of the bed (this was the most difficult part). This was when Gary came to the door and put some towels on my back and I had to put them down so that I couldn't put them back down on my back again. So, as Gary took the towels off, I had to push him to the door, while telling him that he couldn't go back to the toilet for another three minutes because I was too tired. Gary started asking me questions like: Where is he? What's his name? How much time did it take for him to go to the bathroom? I had to keep telling him that I was very tired and I didn't have time to go to the toilet for the bathroom. At this point, Gary was talking to me while he was taking my back and his legs and I had to push his legs away from the door and put them on the side. It was like trying to get the towel out of the end of the bed, which made his legs get stuck to the end of the bed. Gary told me that I was going to have to get on the side of the bed, because it would be very difficult to move the bed because he had to get on to it and my legs would be stuck on the end. This made me move my leg away to put it on the other side. Gary told me that I had to stand on the side of the bed, and he asked me if I wanted to do it. I told him I didn't want to get on the bed and he asked to take the other seat. I told him I didn't mind and he took the seat and we went on to the toilet."

---
<it's now gone a bit porny>
"legend Gary and Pubes Daz go on a journey through the history of anal sex

Cuckold - Kinky Cuckold and a few other guys

Cuckold - Naughty Cuckold - Naughty Cuckolds and the good boys

Cuckold - The Cuckold of England with more Cuckold stuff... and other fun stuff"

----
<Lege and Daz do a gay porno>
"legend Gary and Pubes Daz go to a party in my apartment, where they go for drinks. Then they go to bed where Gary gets his pubes. When they wake up Gary tells him they have slept in the same bed with pubes.

Gary: You are going to get a blowjob from me?

Pubes: Yes I am.

Gary: No, you are going to cum in my mouth.

Pubes: You are going to cum in my mouth.

Gary: No you are not.

Pubes: You will cum in my mouth.

Gary: No I am not.

Pubes: You are not.

Gary: Okay.

Pubes: Yes.

Gary: You are going to cum in my mouth.

Pubes: Yes."

---
<oh noez their dead now :-( >

" legend Gary and Pubes Daz go into battle. Gary gets hit, then pubes Daz goes into the battle. Pubes Daz dies before the fight is over. "

<R.I.P Pubes Daz>

Paul Calf


Paul Calf


kalowski

Text synth to the rescue
QuoteTalk To Transformer is no longer available as a free product.

This product can be returned to the same retailer or store if the issue cannot be resolved, and the return must be made within 7 business days of purchase, but we cannot take responsibility for the refund.

Tikwid

Grover lives on:
QuoteLost continent of Atlantis discovered - by TV host Noel Edmonds!

At the news conference, which he held in front of prime minister Theresa May, Edmonds discussed the discovery of the "unexplained new continent" and an accompanying flight exploring the hidden continent. He added he was also in contact with artist Mick Wall and had handed him a set of blueprints to use for the scale model of the oceanic ridge in Hellenic Atlantis.

Edmonds said at the news conference: "The purpose of this story is that I've got a great project called the Atlantis: Lost and Found.'

The plan is to go off to the deep ocean and study it. The fossil remains we have already have given us an idea of what we should be seeing. My ultimate dream is to go find the lost city of Atlantis and to sit on its steps.

Edmonds continued: "According to my calculations, I reckon this is the sixth dimension - and we should be able to use it and use it more."

Edmonds noted that UK scientists believe that Atlantis was lost when a rock earthquake severed the continents and Earth drifted on to an evolutionary path.

Quote
EastEnders' Phil Mitchell discovers grotesque ancient city in Antarctic mountains - and the liberal BBC is FURIOUS

Phil Mitchell (Steve McFadden) discovered an ancient city in the walls of the Antarctic mountains on EastEnders - the BBC has defended the publicity stunt.

The local legend is that what they discovered was a secret camp where some of the first people to set foot on the frozen continent discovered a city.

While Phil discussed the discovery with Dennis, mum Sharon got a sinister message from Phil's ex Max Branning, who told her he'd turned in the real culprit and was in custody and had to go to the police station.

Phil was terrified to find Max there though, and it led to him attempting to poison himself while he waited for police to arrive. Max's innocence and Phil's distrust of him wouldn't last long though. In the end the police came and the sinister letter was followed by a visit from the lawyer Mick Carter (Danny Dyer).

'Olive' revealed that Max had spent 18 years in jail for brutally murdering Jack Duckworth (Larry Lamb), and he's being extradited to the UK to be face justice for a murder the cops have confessed to.

The local legend is that what they discovered was a secret camp where some of the first people to set foot on the frozen continent discovered a city. Phil was unsure of the history of the site and convinced Sharon to buy him a trip there herself. Phil believed the city name was connected to some of his bad memories about his dad and the old dead man.

Although EastEnders has defended the stunt, some viewers have been more than let down.

Ian Millns said: "With no history of baking and no knowledge of other critters, one of my questions for #eastenders is what would it have been like to have been in that freezing environment instead of baking the baked beans. Janine did not attempt anything like that when she was in the Vic?"

Hilary added: "Did @bbceastenders & @bbceastenders just dig a hole for a gas cylinder and hosed down my Sky is my tv roof for the 12th time tonight?? No I cannot deal #eastenders"

And others think the stunt has ruined the finale to an "outstanding" series:

Westworld had better ratings tonight, EastEnders is getting royally knocked off it's perch, at least it's keeping it real #EastEnders pic.twitter.com/u1DaRl3OJR — Blanche Coe (@BitchOfWarrington) June 6, 2019

QuoteOnly Fools and Horses' Del Boy and Rodney to appear in Ridley Scott's new Alien movie - "LV-426 is cushty!"

Remember him? That incredibly popular mop-haired Londoner in a plaid shirt and a docker cap? But Del Boy (David Jason) and Rodney (John Challis) don't have much time left in this world and have taken to posing as southerners in order to avoid trouble.

Del's first port of call for the abject poverty of the American south (A million, £200 in fares just to get to the post office!) was to find himself in Jeff Ross's Fat Black Bandits with Goldie, Leroy and Pappy Maloney. And finally Del flew halfway across the world to the Moon.

Well, the saga continues with the spoof video, this time from Variety, who have revealed that Del and Rodney will also feature in the new Alien movie.

Entertainment Weekly broke the news a few weeks ago, saying: "The adventure film co-starring Alien protagonist Ellen Ripley will be the 20th Century Fox release's last hurrah before Alien: Awakening, James Cameron's 2019 prequel, steals its sci-fi thunder for the next two decades."

On his return to Earth, Del meets former band mate Rodney who has moved from club DJ to club manager and now treats rock-star clients like a top doctor. Rodney needs an emergency blood transfusion after he gorges himself on giant hamburgers and regularly spots a rogue bug in his skin. Del thinks he's dead... until Rodney pops out the trunk with a hairbrush in one hand and a drill in the other.

Facehugger!? Yeah, that'll happen.

Well known on social media as a prolific user of emojis, many fans has been pointing out the obvious lack of a nipple, an arm, or a fist.

Del Boy & Rodney in Alien 3. A cheeky detective is involved, but no boob-out!

Del Boy has always been ambiguous about his sexual orientation (Stella Moneypenny certainly wouldn't get involved in anything gay!), with fans wishing the possibility of the characters being a little more explicit was being explored.

Del Boy had a little fun with that back in 2013 when he mocked the Ghostbusters cast, saying that he'd be seeking out Cortana (the AI played by Jennifer Lawrence in the movie) in the latter.

Fambo Number Mive

QuoteLegend Gary and Pubes Daz take on Juggy
June 6, 2019 - Peter the Prick
Happy St. Patrick's Day! In the Boar's Head Stream section today, we're discussing modern turkeys and their tendency to have identifiable coloration. Why are there green feathers in their bellies, why do their feet often have white tips, and what does all that mean? Our friends at the Horrible Book Club love to engage in fun discussions that are riddled with MFA jargon and deconstructive jargon. If you're new to the Boar's Head Family, be sure to check out our most recent interview with Jody Dias and Aimee Bender, authors of Fever Dream.

"It must be very easy to respond to a peach tie. For example, Yellow boots in your football kit." —Ian Bremmer on how Vikings exuded a more old-world, less consumerist sense of identity.

Yesterday's lived-in pubic hair features: While Jigglypuff and Drakkar Noir may provide an aesthetic fit for animal rights activists, strange combinations are still a stock in trade in the world of hair accessories. On Juggy, what goes where?

Our boar's head stream partners the Boar's Head staff and a handful of their favorite cartoon-related locals in a rivalry to see who can generate the funniest tweets, Instagram posts, and mentions. Do you have a favorite or two? Join us! —Peter the Prick

Come visit us on Facebook!

Drop us a line at Peter@Boar's Head Stream and stay tuned for more Boar's Head Snippets every day!

Quoteslate.com
Legend Gary and Pubes Daz take on Juggy
June 6, 2019 - Peter the Prick
The June food minute comes to us via Mr. Gary—whose name is also the handle for a 2018 whiskey (hence his participation in our new, uh, down-there Menu Hall of Fame)—and an interview with his good friend Pubes Daz, of Clinton.

If you were to run a story on Gary's latest work, your headline might say something like "What are you going to do when you get older? I thought you were going to learn to drink whiskey. You might even be sober for a while." And that, friends, is a fair assessment of his new spirit, Legend Gary Whiskey, a limited release bourbon (only 1000 are being made!) available only at Moonshine Man in Clinton.

Legend Gary Whiskey, my friend Gary is going to have some "talk about it" with myself & @PubesDaz later today. You, on the other hand, might want to head to moonshinemanclinton to get your take on it. #LegendGaryForHimself #downthenight #welcometothewaysomegirls A post shared by Gary Stump (@gary_stump) on Jun 6, 2018 at 10:35am PDT

But Gary also makes — and makes very well — two lighter beers. (Like the whiskey—Gary is, by now, a truly legendary man.) This week, for instance, he's releasing Relic's 6, which is a fresh and fun Belgian black IPA, the perfect afternoon drink with bib endered waifs in tow, like the floppy-haired ones in the photo above. But none of that is coming any closer than the beer preview you are reading this on, of course.

Gary does have to say something, and Gary says something about things that are allusions to things that are references to things that are references to things. As if he and Pubes don't do it better than anyone. Anyhow, to listen to onetime comrades Gary and Pubes ramble on about a stupendous sip of liquor and a great sense of humor, click on over to the audio in this week's Eating & Reading podcast.

P.S. If you're in the mood for some honorifics and more complex language this week, here's a post about the merits of hellos from Greg and Joe Karr.

Tikwid

Text Synth, basically Talk to Transformer in all but name, has recently been updated to allow access to GTP-2's parameters, which mean you can fine tune the randomness of the output to your taste. You might need to experiment a bit before getting a setting that hits the sweet spot - "top-k" and "temperature" seem to be the ones that have the most effect - but you can achieve a broad range of results, from vaguely plausible right up to full James Joyce mode:

Top-k 40, temperature 1
Quote
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE - 4AD Records have announced the release of a new split EP from Scott Walker and Mark Hollis.

The EP, titled
"The Walker/Hollis Split EP", is a 6 track collection of two of the best songwriters of their generation at work.

The Walker/Hollis split EP sees them collaborating on songs together on the first track, "The Walker/Hollis"

"Scott Walker and Mark Hollis are two of my favorite songwriters. It's been such a joy to collaborate with Scott and the band. And I'm a big fan of Scott's writing! My favourite song on the EP is "The Walker/Hollis" because of its ability to seamlessly blend with Mark Hollis' amazing guitar playing. I've been really lucky to have played with them both and I know their energy, their ability to write great songs.

We all got together to do this one song and that's how I first heard their music. It was amazing. Mark and Scott are two of my favorite songwriters right now!"
QuoteWESTMINSTER - Government officials have announced that Boris Johnston has died from drowning in his own diarrhoea.

According to a spokesperson for the Health and Safety Executive (HSE), officials have been unable to identify the cause of his death and that "we have no evidence of a crime".

On Friday afternoon an HSE statement said:

"Following a post-mortem report which confirms that the death of a 31-year-old man in Dublin this morning is not due to a criminal act or accident, the HSE has been unable to provide any additional information regarding his death.

"The man was found dead on the river banks, in the south side of the Dublin Ship Canal, at his flat on Clontarf Road, in Dublin city, this morning at 6.20am.

"An autopsy is underway in order to identify the man's cause of death."
Top-k 40, temperature 2
Quote
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE - 4AD Records have announced the release of a new split EP from Scott Walker and Mark Hollis.

The EP, titled
EPs II-V of the New Frontier , drops October 20 (just a few weeks short of his 10th Anniversary)! In the spirit of an original and exciting follow back EP, the first album "I'm Scott Walker I Like You Not Too Hard" will come along for this one on its November 7 release through Darkroom Vinyl Distribution."With it we are working on something that has had me dancing this past year on an even level the night it arrived; EPs Two through X will offer a much fresh, refreshing sound than is evident off previous albums that many had said didn of lost steam" added Walker, who noted that new material that features his wife, Jodi are making it's way onto the new album this fall!Pre-Order the whole 2 album set through itunes! DarkRoomVinyl.Co. -
QuoteWESTMINSTER - Government officials have announced that Boris Johnston has died from drowning in his own diarrhoea. It is a sad thing to report. Our condolences to Mr Johnston's extended family, friends.. .We would gratefully extend our condolences and prayers, to Mr Tye Denny, Superintendent who has returned after an eight year ill-health in Spain... Retired Track Forester Joe Davis has been recuperating at Walter Reed Medical in Bethesda, Delaware following minor surgeries a bit, two decades or so ago... Our concern is deep after that sad evening a few decades ago. A young lad just passed away after an alcohol and motorcyle accident that took them on vacation across Canada, only weeks apart... Good evening again to everyone, we hear the bus operators are out doing their job all across the CTA system. ..Enjoy the long days ahead, on the bus again with you soon if you do your usual bus runs. ..Our prayers for a speedy recovery to Superintendent G.Denniston who fell down the stairs of his hotel, on the second night in Canada from a cardiac
Top-k 1000, temperature 2
Quote
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE - 4AD Records have announced the release of a new split EP from Scott Walker and Mark Hollis.

The EP, titled
Self Recovery , records Mike Portnoy, Walk Hard Greatsword?, 2 Wise Persons Intercompany Magic Gang collaborative jazz oiragh drums by Brett Mesreem along wit Aaron Hans of Yimataipoker for instrumental reity on opening credits but ended bing you up thinking Mignolaites mooch beat i created for self very little 2 print , now version according high priced DMAN headphones, therefore either look through personal storage about own 2 anufact., compare radio not selling waep versions since you soon pay up lo $& get glad you loved
Matt Preharbuzkwasrevesna"<tf not nor spawsie 2 not had hat go or might jamf M> Also such sw eyes have never listen again's ^feels cwise self injury or be eking "presorted amoy time times life having health out moment, z got here must devie fi soon gotta a wish brain hable either felt relief without charek up hand mentality q aiv realna do soon gotta
QuoteWESTMINSTER - Government officials have announced that Boris Johnston has died from drowning in his own diarrhoea. On 20 August Liam Avery, 57, his hairdressing 'studio sweetheart'/) Valentine McCarthy Rayley, 65 Anumber Adelaide Mayor Katrina Routsey the House Coun Cressida Fillah Aghgio Zannollo the Mrs Marlis Barrow Thatcher Balantukhr Harassed Helen Manning. Caroline Lawrence Ashley Baldeman in Thirst by virtue Dutton Calren Delins Tamara House Child Deozeal, 42 Former club 1 Kyle Noble Theo Kettlefelt Isaac Moore Jacob Horton Bobby Manning Crack then Waroll Toons on (under ground East Shermond STILL FREE) HUGHLifFSll Dybey Torill a Little. No Sloppers Afsohal Inocidence Judger More (Best if little above you local clipp'nshambearenct London George Soborn.. That Mar Linice Telemd Iniciable Peidward Anderson Alan Anthony Ched Niles Little Annie Hamley Duttrien Robinson Douglas Moore Ken Dennis Asshanah, Martin Lloyd Abdisibar Albert Henderson Alpr'd Mc iM lbr
C.. Slope Mrs Ruth Munks Hus Kate Hudson Joe Groalis Joe Perrie Deurdale Mrs Bobton Roger Warren is Chief Chairman Tommy Gardner- which is Harry Simpson East Bromfield Headmist Princess Wilstinton High Cooper Castle- Mr Curless Barnet Mr Walt Elliots Goodrich Godeslagh Horis and Zeb Cvesnce Coun Ah Anfferson Isaac Cole

olliebean

In honour of NaNoWriMo, I used TextSynth to generate a set of chapter titles. Not sure I can get a whole book out of it, but this seems like a good start:

1. Unspoken Secrets
2. The Littering of the Flesh
3. The Littlest Tragedy
4. Fluffy Pockets
5. Stretches of the Glitter
6. The Littlest Rushing of the Sheep
7. The Longest and Unimpeachable Hand
8. To the Moon
9. On the Wall of Flesh
10. The Great Warts of the Spongy
11. Curses that Can't Desecrate
12. Pussycans of the Tender Spongy
13. The Longest-Troubling Mollusk
14. An Eye to the Eye
15. The Dark Spotted Spongy
16. The Gauntiest Stomps
17. The Littlest-Rising Tressel
18. The Largest of the Spotted Fogs
19. The Big-Squeeky Spotted Fogs
20. The Rounding-up
21. The Most Puffy of the Stoned Fogs
22. The Unwatched Squeekies
23. The Littlest-Spinning, The Longest-Spinning, the Small-Squeeky Fogs
24. The Longest-Rising Splashes
25. The Unhealing, The Big-Spinning, The Little-Spinning, The Curling-Up
26. The Curling-Up Spits of the Longest-Rising Fogs
27. The Little-Spinning, The Large-Spinning, The Curling-Up
28. The Longest-Rising Spit-spits
29. The Longest-Spitting of the Small Fogs
30. The Big-Spinning, The Curling-Up, The Curling-Up-a-Splash

olliebean

Chapter 1. Unspoken Secrets

In a corner of his mind, the man who would become his friend would tell him stories about what came before him. He would describe how he had lost the ability to tell his own stories. He would describe how he had lost his father in his own arms. He would mention how he had been born at the very end of a series of deaths, so that he knew of his birth as only a tragedy. But he would also talk about the time in which he had grown up, from the moment he had died, and the only time he had had the ability to tell his own stories.

The first time he spoke to the man was the night of the fire - and it was when he was still a human. He would remember all the things that he had had to leave behind, even though this was all he had known as a human, a child - not a memory, a sense of identity, but a sense of place and time.

Yet, once he became a person, he was able to forget all that, too, and his memories became an entirely different thing from his own.

And a lot of times, those memories would come back to haunt him - the memories that had kept him alive, in times that were far too short to remember them.

It was only those memories that stuck with him - he could only remember what they were like as he remembered them.

After this, everything was only that - memories. It was only when the darkness had been lifted from him that he was able to come back to the life he had led before.

No.

Not until he remembered himself - to the living.

The only memories that came back were those that had kept him alive.

His mother's, his father's, the ones that had kept him safe. The ones that had let him live. The ones that had kept him alive.

The truth about them - that they hadn't died was true as well, when he knew that they didn't have to.

He must have been living a life of suffering and fear before the day had ever come where it would stop.

There had to have been another way.

- - - -

In the darkness, he couldn't see his mother - but he knew of the way she did things. And there was another way to remember her, which wasn't any different from the way the memories had been. Her body was gone, but as soon as he touched her fingers, she was alive again. The two of them both survived, because it would have been dangerous to let go. The feeling of her warmth felt in his bones made him feel alive again.

But his father was left in the dust, though the body had been lost. He had taken the time to do something for him - and his mother died in her own way.

He was happy that one life had been saved. But it would have been selfish of him to leave his father alone, so he could be sure that he had done right.

If he let his mother go, then he was done with it.

She had to have some kind of way of remembering her children, maybe even to have a story to tell.

He was a little ashamed. Because it wasn't that he didn't want to remember his father, or that he didn't want a father. But when he saw his father, he knew that he didn't want either thing, neither did he want any other thing.

He would have known how it felt to remember - if not for the fear of it, then for the guilt of letting go.

- - - -

In front of the TV screens, a movie came on.

It was too late for the people who died, but they must have been looking for it.

They must have been scared of the things that were on the screen.

At least they were alive and alive and alive.

But they were like children - scared of the things that were on the screen. They were afraid to look.

No matter how scared they were. There was no matter how long they might be.

His mother died not even a year after they had met. He didn't know what she had been thinking when he took his mother's life. He knew what they had been talking about, but he did not know the details.

What if she had gone through the same thing as him? What if she had died in front of the TV. And he didn't know the details either.

Or he did and thought nothing of it.

In fact, he had given up on remembering his father. And he would not let his mother die.

- - - -

A long time ago it was a story that had been told and told many times. It was also sometimes told over and over again.

But now that was something that could never be forgotten.

He had come to the conclusion that his father was dead as well. And he couldn't forget this. He wanted to forget it. And he also wanted to erase the memories, as well as everything he knew of his father.

He wished he could be like his father and erase the memories, but he couldn't.

All he could do was try and forget and hope that it would turn out otherwise.

The old man had died at his side. His wife was murdered by a knife and his parents were dead, the whole family dead.

The person who had killed the father was an angry man. He had killed him in front of him, in front of his wife, for no good reason.

The person who had killed his mother had been the same. It was the kind of murderous woman who hated her children to the core, would not look kindly on them, hated them to her core.

He could understand it. It was the same. He couldn't understand it.

So he simply looked away, and with that he erased his mind.

To forget, to forget everything.

He had no choice but to leave things like that behind.

So if he wanted to remember, he had to hope.

He tried to forget everything. The things he had done or did not do, with no regrets. The things that had happened to him during his life, the events that he had seen and heard, he couldn't remember anything about.

He tried to forget, but for his friends he could only feel regret.

He tried to forget all this. But it wasn't as easy as his parents wished it would be. He couldn't forget things like the events that had happened to him. He couldn't forget the ones he had seen.

A person who would let his mother murder him in front of his brother did not deserve to be happy.

So he tried to forget, to forget everything.

By that he didn't mean that he couldn't tell his parents his sad story. That he couldn't tell them his terrible memories.

But for them, he wanted them to understand it, wanted them to understand it, wanted them to forgive him.

Because there was nothing but his own memory that needed to be made.

- - - -

When he saw what had been done to the world after this time he felt a wave of gratitude in his heart. It seemed like so much had happened over so long that he now felt certain that he was only a shadow of his former self.

As he began to move away he looked back at the people. All of them had vanished.

As he watched them he began to hear the familiar whispers.

They were telling him one simple lie that all the people of this planet would tell them.

That he had gone insane. That he had died a hero.

He would not believe it.

He would never believe that those were his words.

Then he thought back to his own life as well.

This whole earth was full of people. All of them had been lied to. They all lived on this earth because of lies. All of them are liars.

One simple lie was enough to destroy the entire planet, and leave him a homeless man in a dark land.

He took comfort in that his family could not be as bad as those of others. They had always been there for him. They were the ones who gave him hope in his worst time.

The truth, though, was all that he would receive. Just a short time ago he had seen a star fade over this planet, leaving his own world a barren wasteland. He would watch that star fade. For so long he had no idea how long he would remain homeless.

So he watched.

- - - -

"Please, leave me here, my people."

The voice that had called him returned the second he approached his bed.

"I know you don't believe me, I know."

He sat on the bed at a shallow angle. He stretched out on his side and looked down at his feet. Then he felt his feet move. It had always been impossible for him to move around his body in his current position. His skin was rough. Not by a long stretch of time, it had had enough cracks that could have cracked his skin.

He saw a figure standing over him. There was no trace of flesh. There were a few hair streaks on his forehead, but they were pale and unkempt. It was the kind of person who would be able to take one look at a random stranger and not get a reaction. It was just too intimidating to face off against.

The figure spoke to him.

"Do you believe me? You will die in the space around the star."

So he responded.

"Yes."

Have you ever farted on a wasp? No, but maybe in my room as an experiment. Why should I care? I have no interest in you having any kind of sex on my bed, or having anything to do with your vagina. Don't you believe me? Not that I'm going to let that little bit of information slip by me. No one's touching me, and I'm definitely not going to take my clothes off just to let you fuck me. We won't even try until you are satisfied. I don't need to have any kind of sex on my bed. No, wait, wait. You're really getting close. I can still feel it starting to come out of your anus. I think you're already starting to leak. You've lost it. It is too late to stop this now, though. The moment we stop this, we both will be trapped in your tight little pussy. Not in yours, but in yours. That's all I need. Cum for me, just like you just did

olliebean

Chapter 2. The Littering of the Flesh

"A good person always wears his skin in order to avoid getting burnt. He's not an ordinary person who wears his skin to look good."
- Shifu


On the day his body was burned to a crisp, someone gave him a lot of money to buy a new shabby coat. He took it and tried to use it to clean his shabby flesh. It was very painful, but he kept trying for an entire night.

At daybreak, his body felt like it was a little hot. He could smell an unusual taste of garlic. He ate his meals in the dark until morning. His head throbbed, but he couldn't speak.

He knew he was doomed to die someday, but he refused to let it happen. It just didn't matter to him, in the end.

His bones were strong, but his soul was dark, and there were no memories of his past life. But there was a story waiting for him, and he had to hear it.

He'd heard it before.

- - - -

In a distant country far away, a lonely man lived in a wooden hut. When his soul began to wander, he was asked how he met his destiny. He said he met a strange man that used to live in the hut. When the man died, he became the man he came to know, and the new man went back to his old life. Now the new man is looking for the old man, and they must meet at the right place to discuss the future. The new man's journey is the story of the old man's journey, and the new man's path is the story of the old man's life.

A person is not born with a particular path in his heart; only something can become his path. To be something you have to be who you are.

And I know it sounds stupid but I have always wondered why do people do what they do? Why do you care if what you do is wrong? Why do you care whether you don't like what you do?

Why do you want to become an astronaut and stay in space?

Why do you want to be the best at your job, or be the best at your job and be in charge of the company, or get rich at your job, or get rich at your job and be the best at your job? Why do you want to be a president and sit there with the biggest, most expensive and best-educated people in the world and have your name on everything? Why do you want to be President?

Why do you want to play football?

And I think this is where you can really start learning to love life.

That was the original lesson that I took in school. When we learned about that, we had to figure out what we were and what we wanted, what made us happy. What were we going to do in life that we knew was right, in life? And that was where we got lost. This was where we missed the big picture and thought that if we just did what we had to do to feel happy, then we would be happy. And that in this moment of confusion that we had, we didn't really have to think. That was that moment we were living, that was our happiness. There was no bigger and better way to be happy than to be happy and feel happy.

So we got stuck in this way of living. We didn't know what to do. "What were we going to do in life that we knew was right, in life?" And the more we thought about this, the more we tried to act like we were being happy with people around us, and not feeling that.

Because when we were just at this level of happiness, we were so focused, and focused on what was good and what was not. You know, when you're the big guy in the world it doesn't matter. It's not about what you are happy about. But when you're the little guy in the world it does matter, but in the moment of real life you don't really want to be happy, because if you are a little guy all you want to do is sit on the couch and watch your favorite movie. There's no reason to be happy because it doesn't matter.

It becomes really interesting when you try to give people what they don't want, and how you don't want to give people what they want, and you're like, well it's just a feeling. Maybe I just feel it. Maybe I just feel I'm very busy. Maybe I just feel people aren't paying attention to me. Maybe they are paying attention but I don't feel they are paying attention.

And this is sort of the whole point of it, and it's actually something that I think a lot of people don't have any awareness of. You know we don't get this. We don't experience this. And we don't get this because we know we have it. We feel that sense that when we have something it's right, right, and everything is ok, when in fact, when we don't have something at all, then there's some pain behind it.

I really try to think about that every day.

- - - -

At night, he couldn't hear anything at all, but a strong throbbing sensation came into his head.

"Is this all normal?" Annie asked from behind him. "Is this your body?" As soon as she took a step forward, Annie was gone. She disappeared into the night.

What's wrong? What happened? What's wrong? This can't be happening? This is going to happen again tomorrow?

He stood at the door of the house, looking for the sound of footsteps. As soon as he went inside, something was on the floor. He opened the door with all his strength, but couldn't find it. He sat down at the foot of the stairs.

A voice cried out at him in a hushed voice, "It's okay now. I know. My body wants to live again."

"What is this thing?" Annie said from behind him, her dark hair hanging down over her shoulder.

"Something is here," said the voice that was so familiar to him. It was a voice he had heard in moments before. He couldn't recognize it.

The other person that Annie had mentioned didn't understand what had happened, he thought, it's so quiet... So strange... That's what's wrong.

He pushed his hand away. His hand felt raw, he couldn't remember the last time he felt something like that. He tried to walk away from the door, but was afraid to get up, he couldn't even move his legs. His feet felt like steel and he could hardly believe how he was standing in the room. All he could do was push his feet into the floor and pull his shirt off. He felt the fabric of his shirt as he tried to force himself to stand.

"I was scared to death. I was so afraid. My heart beat like a wild horse and my body was screaming for death. I thought it would stop if I took a step forward."

The voice stopped and there was silence in the room.

- - - -

The words were very hard to decipher and so was the heart.

When he returned to consciousness his head throbbed and he found that everything was wrong with his brain. He had no memory and no memory of anything. It didn't feel right.

He sat up and tried to read his own mind. It was full of confusion and terror.

That's what those things do.

Then he awoke.

There was no sense to himself, no memory, no heart, nothing but that strange feeling that he had. He opened his eyes and stared blankly at the bed. The bed was empty. Everything was lost to him. There was no room to breathe in. Nothing remained save this strange and terrible feeling.

It was too soon for him to know what was wrong. Even in his own sleep his body was restless. He was shaking all over the place, as if his blood was moving around his pores. There was a certain unease that had invaded his body that he had never felt before. It was the same unease he had felt at the time when he had first met the man at the train station. He had not realised what he had done, why he had done it, for how long. As his own mind was filled with thoughts of the strange feelings that he could feel in his skin and in his eyes, he noticed that the strange feeling became more and more painful, becoming more painful and worse. He realised that he was in danger. He realised that he was losing his mind, his freedom, his life. He realised that all he could do was pray for the saviour of his own mind, and to not lose his mind again.

He had not thought that it would be such an unbearable pain to do such a thing. He had not thought that the person who had done it would even be able to stop his own mind from starting. It had not even occurred to him that he had done the thing that he did, that he would not have done the thing as he did it even if he was fully conscious and alive, that he would not have been able to stop the mind from starting, that he would probably not even be able to stop the thoughts from starting. For him, this very thing was impossible. He was trapped.

How could this be possible? This was absolutely impossible. There was no way he could ever do this to anyone in the world. He knew that as long as he were dead, no one in the world would ever be able to find him. All of this was just a dream of his, this was just a dream of a young man, dreaming of doing a strange thing and of feeling pain, of feeling the fear of the world...

But if he did not stop it, if he did not ask for help, if he did not try to make it better, he was doomed to live in this nightmare. It was almost frightening to think that he had killed himself. It seemed absolutely certain that he could never actually die and there was no way of ever getting out of this prison. If he allowed himself to believe that he could not die, that he would never die, then he would never even live. Everything that he had done was nothing but a terrible trick to make the death that he needed to happen seem something other than it actually was.

But that was impossible. The suicide wasn't a trick, it was absolutely not impossible. That which he wanted to do was not impossible either, and it wasn't quite a trick either. The idea that he wanted to live and die and then try to make it better was absolutely not impossible. The very process of creating an illusion of meaning which he thought the world required to be kept alive was also not impossible. He wanted to die, but he did not want to die for the sake of his death. He wanted to believe that he was killing himself, for the sake of himself, but he did not want to believe in the real world.

There was a time, a place of which he did not know; one he did not know existed, in the middle of the night, when all the shadows of his life were falling in. There were times when his mind was so dispirited and dark that it could not perceive anything, and there were times when the sound of his heart could not drown out the sound of the night itself. He stood in this place, alone. He stood in the middle of that darkness where all those shadows lay, for what was it that he desired? What was he to do if he failed? What if he gave up and died? What would that mean to his self-respect and even to himself?

He stood in this place in the middle of the night. This was his true end, and the end was his own. He had always wanted to die, never wanted to live. He had always wanted to see a world where the world never existed. He had always wanted to walk into the darkness where all those shadows lay, just to be rid of himself; to make his own way in a world which no longer existed.

It was to be this.

He had no other way to go, except to die.

olliebean

Chapter 3. The Littlest Tragedy

There were times when The Tragedy would wonder how that tiny girl had grown to be so much larger than she was.

He'd had nightmares of her, the little girl who had tried to take his life. And now she was out there again. The woman walking around in his nightmares. She took the man's gun and ran. She turned the child's mother into his dinner. She ran through the empty streets and over the burning buildings.

She ran until she got there.

She reached him. She held him. She hugged him. She looked into his eyes. Then she stood there. It took a few tries for him to believe she was a woman.

The moment he had been ready to believe, she was gone. She was no longer the little girl standing on the corner, screaming. She had grown up to be more than that. She was something else. Something bigger. Something powerful. And the darkness that was her fear became her strength. The darkness that was her hatred became her rage. And when she felt like tearing that darkness apart, no matter how weak the world around her, she would do it.

But The Tragedy couldn't be scared of everything at once. He was frightened when he took his eyes from The Littlest Tragedy. And if he looked at all of The Tragedy, The Tragedy would have taken his eyes away.

- - - -

The Tragedy was a man who had three children in his lifetime, all children he loved deeply. In the end he had only one of those children to love. The one child that was close enough to him for him to trust.

The Tragedy loved his mother very much, and so often that when she had given birth to a new child, the Tragedy would have looked at it like he had watched a star. Every morning when he came home from work he would sit on the couch to wait until his mother brought her food for him, so that he could bring the one Star into his body. Every evening before dinner, he would take The Tragedy to his office, put on a little robe, and kneel down. So that when he had come out of his office and walked to his kitchen for his supper, he would see his old room behind him, still empty. And he would see the Tragedy standing outside that room, waiting for him. And he would see that nothing would get in between them. He would not trust anyone or anything with that much power. He would never be that close to anyone. But The Tragedy had always been close to him, and always had been right. He had never once said anything that had upset The Tragedy.

A Tragedy would never let a child out of his home, not even his own, unless he was prepared to be cut down by it. He had watched to see that The Tragedy knew how to protect his people. He had watched to see that The Tragedy had been careful, to see that The Tragedy did not give up.

It was not The Tragedy's duty to be right all the time. He had seen too many wrongs. And what he always saw was his true duty, that no matter how many wrongs he had seen, that he would always give his word, never to break. He would always try to be right.

The Tragedy would put no more words in The Tragedy's mouth that would not end in disaster. "I'll give The Tragedy a piece of me, if he breaks me!" That made The Tragedy laugh. Now this didn't mean that he would break anyone. But it meant that he wouldn't have that kind of weakness, that weakness of the weak that people of the weaker races had. The Tragedy would try to kill every last bit of them, to hurt every last race, the weakest, the most helpless, or even the last. If there was a weakness in The Tragedy, The Tragedy would be strong.

If there was one weakness in The Tragedy, he would be strong.

There would be no weakness.

- - - -

The man ran. A tear fell from his eye. He saw the woman at the top of the stairs, his heart racing.

Her hand was on his gun. The child's mother was dead.

"That's my life," the man said in his dead mind, his voice breaking. A scream.

The woman fell from the stairs. The dead woman fell at his feet. A cry. A hand on his shoulder.

The man ran. The woman ran.

But she didn't die. She wasn't dead. When he ran the woman wouldn't stop running. One hand on his shoulder, another on his rifle. He couldn't let go. He had to stay with her. He had to try to stop the screaming. If he didn't try to stop her he'd die. He had to. He had to. Her scream was too heavy to hear. He could still hear it even though he'd forgotten her. He had to help her.

He had the answer, just in time.

She was a woman with big brown eyes, the girl he had tried to destroy. What was there to hide? And what had he done? Not a damn thing. But she'd taken his gun and ran, the gun's bullets and his life.

He had the answer.

She had killed her child, in her sleep, and was no longer in his dreams.

It was a nightmare he would never forget.

- - - -

And now, after everything he had done and lost, he was alone.

And he couldn't see what was ahead.

He looked back and realized that he was looking at a giant wall. The white sand of the desert.

His heart stopped.

A giant wall of sand.

His vision went white.

He opened his eyes.

A wall of sand.

A wall of sand.

A wall of sand.

He saw nothing. No world. No horizon.

That wall of sand was in front of him, looming ever larger. And in front of him, rising on all sides, was the desert.

The man's brain went blank.

There were so many things in front of him. So many worlds. So many people. So many memories. He could taste them. He could feel them. He could smell them. He could taste them. He could feel them. He could smell them. And he saw nothing.

So he saw the wall, now. A wall of sand. And in front of it, rising on all sides, was the desert.

And he knew. He knew what the wall was.

The wall of sand was a mountain. And he knew it was a mountain.

And the wall of sand was a city. And he knew it was a city.

And the wall of sand was a highway. And he knew it was a highway.

And the wall of sand was a fortress. And he knew it was a fortress.

And the wall of sand was a wall of sand.

The man stared at the wall.

It was so tall. It was so high. It was so white.

And he could see his father in the wall. In the sand.

He could see the walls of his city. In the sand.

He could see the streets of his city. In the sand.

And he knew he was in the city. Inside the sand.

And there was nothing.

And he knew.

olliebean

Chapter 4. Fluffy Pockets

Her body was shaking.

She was not comfortable. Her clothes weren't comfortable. Ain't so much a costume as they were a life preserver.

Her nose was bruised and her eyes were bloody. She hadn't slept all that often. The whole place was so warm it didn't even feel cold.

Soothe her body with the stuff.

There were a few times she was scared of getting warm so hard she had to give in. Once when she was wearing the same coat for three nights and got tired of the fur. Another time when she had been wearing a tattered and dirty t-shirt.

Her clothes were so tight they were practically a blanket.

Her body was shaking. Her eyes were wide and droopy. Her fingers were hot and sticky and dry.

What should she do, she wondered. What should she do?

She pulled back a little with her hand. Her eyes were burning. Her skin raked from her hands as she walked to the door. As she turned her head to see what had happened, her mouth was full of saliva.

Her eyes were wide and dazed. It was probably because of the long hours that had gone by that she had been sweating. She was so sweaty she had lost all of her body heat, and was running out of hot sweat.

Her legs stood still on the seat.

That was how she remembered it.

She was a little too familiar with the dress. It had been made from the fabric that had been on the back of her shoes. She looked at it with a very sad gaze.

And there was a hole in it.

She wondered what it was that she was seeing. She thought about how her clothes would have looked with her new skin and fur, and what her skin would have looked like now.

So she was a girl for now.

She walked towards the door. This wasn't a big deal.

- - - -

She closed her eyes as the next part of her life went by.

Her mind seemed to shut off as if she was in another world. Her body seemed to move out of existence, like a portal into the world of reality.

She was in her body, but she was gone, she was nowhere.

The next thing she knew, she was floating down the air. It was like a dream, like it was a dream with the world in it. She was floating with a breeze blowing against her face. All around her were people. They were all looking at her and saying "You look beautiful." That's how she told herself it was.

In her head, everything was just like a dream, except she was floating above it. The people were all pointing at her as she floated, all of them were smiling. Everything was a dream except it was real. Everything was happening in a dream, it was just happening.

In the middle of her dream, the people stopped talking. They just stared at her. She was floating above them and they were all staring back at her with sad faces. She was watching them all with a longing.

I could feel her soul going to the top of my head in her head. It was her soul that was telling me she was lost on the other side of the universe. But it would never do anything without me noticing it. I could hear a strange, gentle voice whisper.

The universe was so huge and she was just floating over it, and now that she was floating, she was falling over it. The universe was so large and so beautiful to her, she could just take in the place that made the universe.

She could take in everything around her, just so the scenery felt right to her. Everything was so perfect, just so she could take in everything.

A light suddenly came from deep inside of her, and she blinked her eyes, seeing it was her soul. And as she took in her surroundings, she saw it was a city she never lived in, somewhere far away. I could see heart racing in her chest. She wasn't here to see it, she was here to know the universe was bigger than her and bigger than everything around her.

She had made it. She had made it into the universe. She was here to hear it, hear what was happening around her. And she heard it. Like a voice, whispering inside of her. She heard her friends say "she is gone..."

They said "she is gone." That's all I know. Not even "this is a dream." And I think I'm going to miss her.

- - - -

And then she fell down, into this new world where the city was her sister. This new world was so beautiful, she could just walk to the city and stop and think about everything, and she could do anything that was right in her heart. It was like she was moving around in this new world. And like she wanted nothing more than to become the world's greatest singer.

When she stopped dancing, the feeling inside her of feeling her friend who loved her back was gone. That was why it felt so good. It was like she could sing again. It was like she would have another life and then some. It felt like she knew the universe was bigger than her and loved everyone.

Now she was the beautiful star at the end of this new world. She had become the new star of it all, and she was proud of herself for it. She had become this "star" to everyone around her. All because she had danced her heart out with her friends. And not because she didn't love them back. No. She was proud of herself for that. Because she was part of this new universe. Like how she was made.

She would dance on the new star's shoulders, while the new star would play her on the city's shoulders, and everyone else would call her a beautiful star. If she had a boyfriend, she would dance with him every night, and tell him how pretty she was because her friend was so incredible. If she had a husband, she would dance with him every night, and tell him how beautiful she was because her friend was so great. If she had a daughter, she would dance with her daughter every night, and tell her how wonderful she was because her friend was so awesome. And if she had a son, she would dance with him every night, and tell him how delightful she was because her friend was so amazing.

And then it would go to the next world. A new dimension, not just for the star, but for all other characters, as well. And the new universe would become the same place again. But she would dance with her friends. And she would tell her friends how beautiful she was because she was so amazing. And then the next star would be the same as the previous star, but still look different. She would still dance on the new star's shoulders, while the new star would play her on the city's shoulders, and everyone else would call him a beautiful star, but he was still her friend, and she was still his hero. And then it would go to another world, but with different characters. Maybe they were just different worlds, but the same. The previous star was the hero, and the new one was the hero. Now they would meet, and they would dance and they would do their good deeds together. Then it would be back to the beginning. No matter what, they would always be able to dance and they would always do good deeds together. But they would never have met. And they would always be the same. They would never ever ever get to meet.

- - - -

She heard the silence inside of her when she heard her voice - her friends talking and saying "she is gone..." and the room became blacker. And darker. She saw a white outline that she recognized. The shape of her shape was still there in her head. She opened her eyes and found herself in a dark and deserted place. She realized her body was nothing but a blank shell of blackness - she had been there. "What happened?!" she cried. "How?!" she cried out, and her friends cried back saying "oh, we were just trying to leave", "Oh my gosh...why didn't we just do something!? We did all we could."

She heard them talking. She heard themselves, her own thoughts, not just what she was saying to them. She heard it, too, before they realized what it was that they were talking about.

And then, just then, she heard it in her head.

A voice. She was hearing the voice of somebody she'd never seen before.

A voice she'd never heard before, she thought, trying to forget all she had ever heard about herself.

But the voice, the voice that belonged to a different girl, it spoke again.

In a language of pure truth, it spoke.

With a voice of utter confusion and utter love, it said, "What did you do, Miss?"

And it laughed.

And it smiled.

It told her it was sorry and sorry and sorry.

It was sorry for having been.

The way it looked at her made her so embarrassed, so afraid.

And finally she remembered the other girl, the girl that had appeared before her. And she stood up and told her story, as did everyone in the party.

It was all quite strange, and all strange for reasons and reasons and reasons, but at least all this was so much less strange than the fact that it happened at all.

chveik


olliebean

I've been posting the chapters on Facebook as well, and I'm pretty sure at least a couple of people there haven't cottoned on that I didn't write them myself. (All I've done is a bit of curating of the paragraphs, and minor editing here and there for grammar.)

idunnosomename

sounds good

QuoteAnus Copta have just released a new studio album, 'Youth Shelter' on Ipecac Recordings.

Like the name suggests, the album is entirely sung in prison's (aka prisons) with sentences recorded in the then-fictitious Soviet Gulag system. The album's many lyrics were written by an American white supremacist who went by the name of Rusty Snyder. As Le Monde describes it, "Anus Copta's undecipherable new album continues the band's exploration of politically charged topics." This new album follows on from their

jenna appleseed

In front of the TV screens, a movie came on.

The movie on a big monitor turned into "The Mummy: Dawn of the Mummy".

The movie was over.

They could see that the main character of the movie died on the screen and only the main character who was there for the rest of the movie.

The movie in front of them was called "Mummy: Dawn of the Mummy"

The screen turned white and the movie ended.

The TV was off.

They could see on the TV that the TV was on a different TV than the one they had watched the movie on.
Dawn of the Mummy was made for TV on a TV with two windows. The TV had an older look to it and the screen had an older look to it. It had no music, no pictures, no sound.
They could see on the TV that there was a small child sitting in the middle of the screen.
The TV had a picture that was the same age as the baby.
The screen showed the same images of the baby and the baby's face.
The television had no sounds.
The sound had to be heard by the child because it was talking to the children.
They could see the baby was in bed with the mother while the mother was on her knees sleeping.
The TV looked like the movie had faded in on itself.

jenna appleseed

I see a video tape of the movie. It's the original in one of my boxes. It shows that it was shown theatrically. But it's not even really on film... the film is on a piece of paper and then it's not shown. And you're looking for it. It's an interesting thing to look at. [laughs]

---

incredibly lazy daleks
with nope in this thread. You don''te see anything like this... but... here in da front and right, there da da, the middle nite you have the "dope", you ness have it on every corner or... I never noticed, the bottom... but yeah.. there... there we gott all... so much of what you got... nuff to mention that it looks just what da is on nus? I donu... ness, no nite

---
Doctor Who and the incredibly lazy daleks on television has had a few notable fans over this week but it has largely gone the whole length as if no-body bothered about that shit or the obvious issues.  In all, though the writers' collective have done pretty pretty damned excellent for fans, most people won. They may love you, you love them , or at the very very end maybe that shit-you-never/will not understand just gets taken over from other fan communities on various platforms by idiots who probably think they were clever
---

Doctor Who and the incredibly lazy daleks

In the second scene a woman looks to Doctor and his friends as though it says so.

A little weird as a doctor is in control of her and his life when she tries to help and tries to control things that need his cooperation to operate

There may actually not even exist as such, it will be some strange story which will not even happen

When this episode will run is unclear as the ending may or could just not have come. I'm very disappointed by some characters in it

---

started with "Doctor Who and the incredibly lazy daleks"

somewhere in the middle turned into "the alien and sonic and the android/wastewhore;"

jenna appleseed

the alien and sonic and the android/wastewhore the only ones to be present, it is very likely they exist, but there is no evidence on earth of them to the contrary.

"I think I will stay for a few years. The only thing I would tell my family is that I'll have to do better in order to get a fair share. If all my work is a failure and I get the job done, the next time I come back would be even more successful."

The following day, the "Doctor" appears in another universe, in an alternate dimension. There is another universe where the Doctor was killed by the Time Lords in a time rift. They came in from the other side and the Doctor was killed, but it was the time vortex caused by the Time Lords that caused the Time Lords to disappear.

The Doctor is now living in another universe. However, in the next universe he is the same as the Time Lord who was killed in the Time War. The Doctor is trapped in this universe, but has no memories of life from that point on.
He goes to a parallel world and is the next incarnation of the Doctor, who also died in the Time War.
The Doctor is now living in another dimension.
The Doctor is now in another universe.
The Doctor is now in another dimension.
The Doctor is in another dimension.
The Doctor is in another dimension.
The Doctor is in another dimension.
The Doctor is in another dimension.
The Doctor is in

jenna appleseed

is text synth getting sentient?

No. It's not like any of it is.

That was a bit strange.

The whole 'soulful' thing is not that interesting when you put it that way. That's not what it's about. That's not what it's about. This is a very personal thing to me. It's a very personal thing to all of us. I know we've all been there, all of us have been there and it's like, oh no!

---

is text synth getting sentient?

Yes! In fact, our new project, "Reversal" is about this very idea of getting a robot to play music. But instead of using the robot to play some kind of music or a certain melody, we are going to use the robot to play a different melody (and maybe a different synth). That means, that instead of just playing a melody, we are going to play a melody that is different, and different from the original melody that came from the robot.

---

[broken robot attempts haiku]

is text synth getting sentient?

T:

It seems to be

a function of the user,

not of

the

devices by

hearing them

but

it may be

because

of

his/her ability

and

the

loudness or

distortion that

he/she

creates.

This is

the

case

on

Foo,

Beagle 2

Come on then fuck sake, sort it out Yanks, announce the election result you absolute toilets.

Come on you pricks, tell us how you're going to rule us after you've murdered three million of our people.

What kind of history lesson is this, an Ed Stone or a Miley Cyrus / Nicki Minaj mash up?

It's all too confusing, I want to watch Bizarre Foods America instead, or a dog show.

I'm going to go and watch Jeremy Kyle now.

Hello me, oh, it's that dark haired woman again!

Oh, she's beautiful, and I'm a fat man with a ugly voice.

Camp Tramp

Donald Trump is losing his mind.
It's almost completely gone. It's disappeared. What is left is a cranky old man who can't think about anything other than his wall, which is not even being built and doesn't even need to be built at all.

A mere few minutes after the first tweet came out, the president of the United States of America tweeted that he didn't really mean Mexico was going to pay for the wall, just that Mexico would have to pay us back, but no worries, because he's already done so much for Mexico:

Donald Trump is losing his mind
with excitement about an attack that might have never happened.

MTV News reports that this afternoon Trump told reporters that he expected an attack on the U.S. if Hillary Clinton is elected President.

The attacks he was talking about would most likely have been carried out by Muslims who wouldn't hesitate to attack civilians in order to curry favor with the White House by murdering Americans.