Short Kings

[confettiinmyhair]

At 5ft 7" finally I feel recognised.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/jun/21/praise-short-men-king-toxic-masculinity-jaboukie-jonas-brothers

Are you a Short King, like me and Bruno Fucking Mars.

[imitationleather]

Pah. In my day we called it Napoleon syndrome but I suppose the PC do-gooders won't allow that now.

[Barry Admin]

No, I'm 6 foot 6 mate.

[kittens]

i think i'm 5 foot ten. i'm an average sightly overweight king. ladies this summer we are only falling for average slightly overweight kings. men like me don't deserve body positivity. i am the blank slate onto which divergent body types are etched. run of the mill, normal man. just your average workaday stiff. without men like me you'd have nothing to compare the short, tall, handsome, ugly, muscular or weedy men against. the last frontier of body positivity. when will completely normal men be recognised by these ladies with their rules.

[Icehaven]

I'm 5ft 5, which is just over the alleged average for women of 5ft 3, but that seems short, I see loads of women taller than me so there must be some proper shortarses literally dragging the average so low.

[Buelligan]

I am a tall person.  Very tall for a woman I think.  I like it.  But I like all the shapes. 

I have a female friend who's the smallest shortest arse I've ever known, she's tiny all over like a tiny mouse woman.  I think that's pretty nice too but she can't do fuck all like carrying scaffolding boards.

ETA  on the toxic masculinity thing, I do know this guy who is very very short.  I've never measured him but, you know, he's a proper short guy.  Anyway, he does weight lifting so he's square shaped, I'm guessing takes steroids, because he's very angry and he seems extremely unhappy and violent and does speak a lot about being short.  Pretty sad really, we're all god's children and beautiful IMO. 

To balance that though I also knew a hugely successful man with the ladies who was probably under four feet tall, very charming motherfucker.  Rode a huge H-D which killed him in the end, sadly but he did enjoy the journey.

[imitationleather]

I am a tall person.  Very tall for a woman I think.  I like it.  But I like all the shapes. 

I have a female friend who's the smallest shortest arse I've ever known, she's tiny all over like a tiny mouse woman.  I think that's pretty nice too but she can't do fuck all like carrying scaffolding boards.

If you say how tall you are I'll be able to tell you if you're taller than the tallest woman I know.

[Buelligan]

Very tall for here - the tallest person in my village.  But everyone here is tiny.  Normal-tall for the UK I'd say late 170's/180cm.  Hard to measure myself.

[imitationleather]

Very tall for here - the tallest person in my village.  But everyone here is tiny.  Normal-tall for the UK I'd say late 170's/180cm.  Hard to measure myself.

Damn. As with all my posts on this forum, I was fishing for juicy height stories. But they had to be specific.

The tallest woman I know is 6'4".

[Buelligan]

She beats me into a cocked hat.  I feel quite jealous.

[imitationleather]

Obviously I could just make up any very high number but it's got an imitationleather Seal of Truthness.

[Neville Chamberlain]

I stand an astonishing 5'11" tall!!! :-O

[gilbertharding]

I hope this won't be a controversial thing to say - but I think this country finally confirmed it was heading once and for all down the toilet when they abolished the minimum height for Policemen (and it was only 5'8"!)

[Shaky]

I'm 6'1" standing up and 6'11" lying down.

[Barry Admin]

I never liked being tall when I was growing up, although did grow into it, so to speak. I was a lot quieter, so it just made people want to fight me all the time. For the last year - a whole year - I've had little fuckers in the Ingress and PoGo community negatively obsessing over me, and it does seem that just being very tall is enough to make these safety in numbers pricks feel insecure.

So it's a mixed bag.

[Sebastian Cobb]

I'm 6'1" standing up and 6'11" lying down.

you should show it to your neighbour, she'll hit it with a rake!

[Buelligan]

Heheh.

I never liked being tall when I was growing up, although did grow into it, so to speak. I was a lot quieter, so it just made people want to fight me all the time. For the last year - a whole year - I've had little fuckers in the Ingress and PoGo community negatively obsessing over me, and it does seem that just being very tall is enough to make these safety in numbers pricks feel insecure.

So it's a mixed bag.

I've mentioned my brother before, he's a very tall person.  The number of times we've been out together, just standing there quietly, chatting or something and some crowd of people have swarmed up, pushed one to the front and tried to pick a fight,  It's insane.  Very, very, weird and it absolutely does happen.

[bgmnts]

Will it fuck.

[Janie Jones]

On this forum we need to mention Short King Dudley Moore, just under 5'2".

Shout out also to rap genius Lil Wayne who is almost too wee but get mo pussy than you can shake a stick at.

Re tall women, I used to work with a very pretty young woman who was 6'4".Her partner was a true Short King, a 5'7" firefighter, a really lovely bloke who adored her.

[Barry Admin]

Heheh.

I've mentioned my brother before, he's a very tall person.  The number of times we've been out together, just standing there quietly, chatting or something and some crowd of people have swarmed up, pushed one to the front and tried to pick a fight,  It's insane.  Very, very, weird and it absolutely does happen.

Yeah, sounds all too familiar. They want to impress their mates. Someone squared up to me about a month ago, with 5 or 6 lads on hand to back him up. Brave boys.

[Pijlstaart]

Pretty scared of the tall. Plug from the bash street kids was the most dangerous bash street kid, japanese spider crab, all limb and no gunnels, not a fair fight.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBBy7uRPNOE
"Tall up! and up, and up and up and up with the tall corn taste from kelloggs!". Fucking terrifying, and they'd dispatch me with ease.

[Sebastian Cobb]

On this forum we need to mention Short King Dudley Moore, just under 5'2".

Shout out also to rap genius Lil Wayne who is almost too wee but get mo pussy than you can shake a stick at.

Re tall women, I used to work with a very pretty young woman who was 6'4".Her partner was a true Short King, a 5'7" firefighter, a really lovely bloke who adored her.

Didn't help Skee-lo though did it.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

I'm certainly not tall (I think I'm 5'8"), but I can't say it's ever felt like much of an issue.

[Icehaven]

In a previous library I worked in we had a regular customer who was an extremely tall woman, and who also wore high heels, which perturbed a few people as they seemed to think she'd want to try and reduce her obvious exceptional tallness rather than emphasise and actually increase it, but she clearly loved people's reaction to her height and the natural authority her it gave her, as others automatically deferred to her largely (ha!) due to her literally towering over them. Apart from anything else even in flat shoes she'd still have had to duck going through doors, so it made far more sense to embrace it. If I was her height I'd do exactly the same.

Re; Tall people getting started on, Mr. H is 6ft 4 and has had that happen to him once or twice, although due to his general appearance/demeanour etc. it doesn't happen very often. He doesn't really look like he'd stand for any nonsense, as indeed he does not. 

[Buelligan]

Speaking of tall people standing for nonsense, as I've said my brother is tall but he also has a rather disgusting sense of comedic timing, I remember once, standing in a bar drinking with him, a fellow came up, queuing for a bit of argy, my dear bro leant in and did a little sick on the top of his head.  It seemed entirely reasonable at the time.

Also, truth be told, it doesn't matter how tall or hard you are or think you are, if enough of them are around you, you are going down to funky town.  I think the pressure on tall people to be invincible is unreasonable.  Everyone needs a bosom for a pillow sometimes.

[sick as a pike]

I'm reasonably tall (six foot three ish) and have come to realise that my pretend resentment of people taller than me is in fact real, and angrily sour.
I pick up my partner from the station most days and if she arrives at Folkestone West on the 19.23, I have to stand there while seemingly an entire train load of rudely tall people march past.  Why?!  Why that train?! Why so tall?! I think they must install them at Ashford International just to spite me.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Re; Tall people getting started on, Mr. H is 6ft 4 and has had that happen to him once or twice, although due to his general appearance/demeanour etc. it doesn't happen very often. He doesn't really look like he'd stand for any nonsense, as indeed he does not.

I'm 6'3 and it never happens, but I do look like a smackhead.

Although based on people a bit taller than me, I reckon 6'7 is where it really starts to kick in.

[The Culture Bunker]

I'm 6'3 and it never happens, but I do look like a smackhead.

Although based on people a bit taller than me, I reckon 6'7 is where it really starts to kick in.

I'm 6ft 4/5 (depending on whether I can be arsed to stand up straight) and used to look like a smackhead. But then I got a job that afforded me a beer budget.

My brother is 6ft 7, a bit more hefty (he was a useful junior rugby league player) and used to get all manner of shit for it. One night out in Sunderland, he had about seven different wee scrotes come up to him asking for a fight. Bob Mortimer had it right with all those songs about that place.

[Shit Good Nose]

5ft 7?  Short?  Fuck off, mate.  You're a giant.

[Voltan (Man of Steel)]

I'm 5'11" and seven inches shy of a healthy BMI.