Author Topic: Just seen your dad  (Read 7811 times)

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  • Rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant.
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Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #60 on: July 02, 2019, 04:49:13 PM »
Your dad is on the roof btw saying he’s going to take after Rod Hull.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #61 on: July 02, 2019, 05:11:43 PM »
Just seen your Dad frantically looking for Woolworths on the high street,  I gave him a swig of my Apple Tango to keep his blood sugar levels up.

BlodwynPig

  • Throwing two dogs at a goblin
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #62 on: July 02, 2019, 05:19:31 PM »
Has anyone seen Bazooka?

I just seen your dad shove an rolled up old carpet into the back of van. Could have sworn it was twitching

non capisco

  • Going through the motions like a champ.
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #63 on: July 03, 2019, 12:26:45 AM »
Just seen your dad in a shop with one of those big wicker laundry baskets and he was stood by it stripped to his pants with a towel on his head miming playing a flute.

Not very PC.

non capisco

  • Going through the motions like a champ.
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #64 on: July 03, 2019, 12:30:27 AM »
Just seen your dad dancing about on a bit of old lino looking through the bars of a playground going "Well, my name's Grimey Gerald and I'm here to say/I like to rap in a grimey way!"

Bit off, that. What's he playing at?

non capisco

  • Going through the motions like a champ.
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #65 on: July 03, 2019, 12:31:36 AM »
Just seen your dad naked in Bexleyheath town centre bellowing "I AM OMNICRON, EATER OF WORLDS!!"

Not again.

Replies From View

  • Rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant.
  • Golden Member
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  • Gargoyles have milk bags.
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #66 on: July 03, 2019, 12:35:06 AM »
Sorry buddy but I’ve just seen your dad ironing cress into all of your underpants  :(

non capisco

  • Going through the motions like a champ.
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #67 on: July 03, 2019, 12:41:37 AM »
Just seen your dad queuing at Chelmsford beer festival telling a stranger "Of course, you know Michael Barrymore's made a new sitcom, don't you? Only Pools And Corpses!" and then the bloke went "Oh, right, has he?" and just walked out of the queue.

Your dad's patter is shit.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #68 on: July 03, 2019, 12:53:07 AM »
Just seen your dad.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #69 on: July 03, 2019, 01:16:34 AM »
Painting an anus on an android. It's good he's keeping busy.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #70 on: July 03, 2019, 12:01:44 PM »
Just seen your dad.

Hello brother, let's bury the hatchet.

BlodwynPig

  • Throwing two dogs at a goblin
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #71 on: July 03, 2019, 01:38:15 PM »
Dressed as a mole being shoved into the back of a police van.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #72 on: July 03, 2019, 09:02:13 PM »
Dressed as a mole being shoved into the back of a police van.

*Gave me a genuine 4am belly laugh, you wanker.

BlodwynPig

  • Throwing two dogs at a goblin
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #73 on: July 03, 2019, 09:10:40 PM »
*Gave me a genuine 4am belly laugh, you wanker.

Its what the arresting officer said too

Replies From View

  • Rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant.
  • Golden Member
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  • Gargoyles have milk bags.
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #74 on: July 04, 2019, 12:22:47 PM »
Your dad is so generic looking how would I even know

BlodwynPig

  • Throwing two dogs at a goblin
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #75 on: July 04, 2019, 12:42:44 PM »
Your dad is so generic looking how would I even know

Mole costume

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #76 on: July 04, 2019, 01:05:55 PM »
Just seen your dad at the returns desk in B&Q, asking the 17 year old goth lass if she fancies going out for a drink on Saturday.

BlodwynPig

  • Throwing two dogs at a goblin
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #77 on: July 04, 2019, 01:10:00 PM »
Just seen your dad at the returns desk in B&Q, asking the 17 year old goth lass if she fancies going out for a drink on Saturday.

*whomp* that is a real sucker punch to the stomach.

(cos I did this recently, but in a Homebase)

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #78 on: July 05, 2019, 03:39:56 PM »
Ceremonially draped into a canal.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #79 on: July 05, 2019, 03:41:49 PM »
Mulched at the push of a button. Not what he would've wanted, had anyone asked.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #80 on: July 05, 2019, 03:42:56 PM »
Dalek top, nothing below, but you could tell.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #81 on: July 05, 2019, 03:50:57 PM »
Just seen your dad on one hit point, but still giving it all that to a bunch of goblins. Fair play.

Lordofthefiles

  • A dog with two dicks or a dick with two dogs
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #82 on: July 05, 2019, 04:02:40 PM »
Just seen your dad attempting a streak on centre court.
Got one of his brogues caught in his kegs and fell face first onto the concrete steps.
He was crying, face covered in snot, blood and gravel, as security lifted him away to the cells. Last thing I heard was him shouting "don't tell my son, I'd die if he knew how low I've sunk".
...Whoops, forget I said owt.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #83 on: July 06, 2019, 11:14:15 AM »
Just seen your dad aiming his gloom beam at Montenegro.

Just seen your dad watching A View to a Kill with Cornish subtitles.

Just seen your dad telling a curious fly-tipper that instagram can't show you his broken heart.

>>> maybe that's why Rory Stewart is his kind of guy!

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #84 on: July 06, 2019, 08:16:59 PM »
Seen your dad running himself an early grave.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #85 on: July 06, 2019, 08:18:39 PM »
Your dad made a song about how much of a great dad he is. He played it to everyone on a radio in his garden. There was no sound or any music, but he made everyone listen for three hours.

Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #86 on: July 06, 2019, 08:20:51 PM »
Saw your dad in a pet shop asking the owner why he keeps his children in prison.

BlodwynPig

  • Throwing two dogs at a goblin
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #87 on: July 06, 2019, 08:53:11 PM »
Saw your dad driving on the M4, hand behind his head, look of bliss on his face. "Driverless car" he yells at me as his zips past before plowing into the BP service station outside Chippenham, killing ten. Daft oaf believes everything you tell him about technology apparently. But I won't tell them in court.

a duncandisorderly

  • the rough and tumble of the internet
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #88 on: July 06, 2019, 09:00:31 PM »
he said to say "hello".

so- "hello".

you don't look much like him. shame.

BlodwynPig

  • Throwing two dogs at a goblin
Re: Just seen your dad
« Reply #89 on: July 06, 2019, 09:15:13 PM »
See your dad do a livestream suicide video, ranting at the world and how he's owed big money by some dodgy "cam show operation". No wi-fi in deepest Norfolk. I won't reveal which barn it was...it wasn't pretty...no-one needs to know...pigs'll clear him up.