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Jokes you need explaining to you

Started by solidified gruel merchant, July 05, 2019, 04:23:44 PM

Previous topic - Next topic
Seen on Facebook.
QuoteI saw a car with a bumper sticker saying: "I am a vet, therefore I can drive like an animal."

Suddenly I realized how many gynaecologists' there are on the roads.

Something something women drivers?  What?  "I am a vet, therefore I can drive like an animal" isn't even a premise which makes any sense.

Cuellar

Vet cares for animals
Gynaecologists care for cunts (pardon me)

Ah, that's it, thanks!  What a terribly contrived joke.

(either the Bulgarian, French, Dutch and Spanish people who 'liked' it didn't really get it, or are just more tuned into English swearing than me)

kalowski

But why can a vet drive like an animal. A vet cares for animals, not cars for animals.

NJ Uncut

Simpsons

"Too crazy for boytown and too much of a boy for crazytown"

I assume it means "too insane for juvenile prison, too much of a crimimal for a mental asylum" but what are those terms taken from? They seem like old spiv speak sorta slang

Too insane for Juvie, too young for commitment to an asylum.

SteK

I still don't get Peep Show Series 1 Ep 1 with all that with the 'Outrageous' track, 'Judas' and omertà and reywengay. 'Reywengay' is Prinz Ludwig in Blackadder isn't it?

Yes, I was that sheep.....


weekender

Got any context?  Haven't watched Peep Show in a while.

This is a long shot, but 'Reywengay' sounds a bit like Eastern Europeans might pronounce 'revenge', and if I remember from the first episode there was Mark's line about wanting to win the war for the Nazis on a computer game, so maybe related to that?

SteK

Quote from: weekender on October 15, 2019, 10:11:40 PM
Got any context?  Haven't watched Peep Show in a while.

This is a long shot, but 'Reywengay' sounds a bit like Eastern Europeans might pronounce 'revenge', and if I remember from the first episode there was Mark's line about wanting to win the war for the Nazis on a computer game, so maybe related to that?

Mark (with Toni) was listening to Jez's Prodigy-inspired track 'Outrageous' and taking the piss, Jez caught them laughing. Later Jez explains to Super Hans (from script o t'web)

"The track's shit? Jez, the track's THE shit.
It's just I found Mark laughing at it.
What, so, Mr fuckin' Ocean Colour Pants don't get it? Quelle fuckin' surprise.
Plus he was doing it in front of Toni.
Mate, you gotta get some rewengay.
He broke omertà."

Later Jez arranges some sausages and bacon on Mark's bed sheet to spell 'Judas' and enters the room;

"Wait for the crumbs to fall while my nuts slowly shrivel.
'Actually, I hope they do shrivel ' - Oh! - What's the matter? I thought you liked pork.
How did? What does it mean? It means omertà.
It means rewengay.
I'm sorry, OK? I'm sorry I humiliated you in front of Toni."





dissolute ocelot

Quote from: NJ Uncut on October 14, 2019, 08:26:10 PM
Simpsons

"Too crazy for boytown and too much of a boy for crazytown"

I assume it means "too insane for juvenile prison, too much of a crimimal for a mental asylum" but what are those terms taken from? They seem like old spiv speak sorta slang

Boys Town, formerly Father Flanagan's Boys' Home, is a charity for at-risk children. I'm sure it's been parodied in other Simpsons episodes too. I'd like to know what the origin of the phrase is, it sounds like some kind of horror/crime film tag-line (although probably related to "too fast to live, too young to die", etc).

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boys_Town_(organization)

ylem

#191
The Thick of It - Season 3 Episode 7.  "I despite him as much as fucking James May presumably despises himself." –Malcolm Tucker to Steven Fleming

Who the fuck is James May?

EDIT: Sorry, that should have read "Why does the eminently googlable James May presumably despise himself?"


Ambient Sheep

Quote from: ylem on October 23, 2019, 02:16:45 AMEDIT: Sorry, that should have read "Why does the eminently googlable James May presumably despise himself?"

Now that I can't really answer.  I guess Malcolm just thinks he's the kind of guy who would.

If there's more to it than that then I've missed it too.

Sexton Brackets Drugbust

Isn't Tucker suggesting May is the best of a bad bunch, who must loathe himself for wilfully spending time with Clarkson and Hammond?


metaltax

Nah he really does loathe himself. There was a travel programme with him and Oz Clarke on a few years ago where they had to be in a hot tub together and James May was practically hyperventilating at the prospect of being semi-naked in close proximity to another semi-naked man. Imagine the only validation you have in life being having the piss ripped out of you on television by people like Clarkson and Hammond. Anything to feel like one of the gang eh James?

kngen

Quote from: dissolute ocelot on October 16, 2019, 09:01:07 AM
Boys Town, formerly Father Flanagan's Boys' Home, is a charity for at-risk children. I'm sure it's been parodied in other Simpsons episodes too. I'd like to know what the origin of the phrase is, it sounds like some kind of horror/crime film tag-line (although probably related to "too fast to live, too young to die", etc).

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boys_Town_(organization)

Also a reasonably famous film with Spencer Tracy (as Flanagan) trying to rehabilitate a young, wayward Mickey Rooney, which is probably how it entered the national consciousness.

SteK

Quote from: kngen on October 23, 2019, 04:24:40 PM
Also a reasonably famous film with Spencer Tracy (as Flanagan) trying to rehabilitate a young, wayward Mickey Rooney, which is probably how it entered the national consciousness.

Dunno why but I'm reminded of Angels With Dirty Faces - the film not the Sham 69 song, did Cagney's character go yellow at the end or did he pretend to save the boys?

Famous Mortimer

Quote from: NJ Uncut on October 14, 2019, 08:26:10 PM
Simpsons

"Too crazy for boytown and too much of a boy for crazytown"

I assume it means "too insane for juvenile prison, too much of a crimimal for a mental asylum" but what are those terms taken from? They seem like old spiv speak sorta slang
Boytown and Crazy Town are both bands, I believe? Although BoyTown are a fake one made up for an Australian comedy film, perhaps a bit obscure to be a Simpsons gag.

kalowski

Quote from: SteK on October 23, 2019, 04:36:26 PM
Dunno why but I'm reminded of Angels With Dirty Faces - the film not the Sham 69 song, did Cagney's character go yellow at the end or did he pretend to save the boys?
I suppose both interpretations are valid, but I've always believed he did it for the kids.

mrClaypole

In Fawlty towers "wardorf salad" episode. Sybil is asked "how long have you two been married?"
Sybil replies "since 1485". This has always bugged me as she doesn't deliver it with any sarcasm or misunderstanding at what she has just been asked. In fact not even the audience responds,  have I been missing something all these years?.

jobotic

Doubt it. I often say "since 1968" when asked how long I've been in this job.


EOLAN

Quote from: mrClaypole on October 24, 2019, 01:47:10 PM
In Fawlty towers "wardorf salad" episode. Sybil is asked "how long have you two been married?"
Sybil replies "since 1485". This has always bugged me as she doesn't deliver it with any sarcasm or misunderstanding at what she has just been asked. In fact not even the audience responds,  have I been missing something all these years?.

Obviously related to 1485 being the year that sweating sickness first came to England and linking that with her marriage to Basil.

Bennett Brauer

Just one of those familiar landmark years in history and the teaching of it, I always thought - the start of the Tudor period, and not as on-the-nose as 1066 (eg) would have been. Hadn't considered sweating sickness before, though!

Ferris

Quote from: mrClaypole on October 24, 2019, 01:47:10 PM
In Fawlty towers "wardorf salad" episode. Sybil is asked "how long have you two been married?"
Sybil replies "since 1485". This has always bugged me as she doesn't deliver it with any sarcasm or misunderstanding at what she has just been asked. In fact not even the audience responds,  have I been missing something all these years?.

Isn't it just a dry observation on how long it feels like they've been married?

Bennett Brauer

I assumed mrClaypole knew that much and was asking why 1485 in particular - but maybe not.

SteK

Quote from: FerriswheelBueller on October 24, 2019, 04:49:46 PM
Isn't it just a dry observation on how long it feels like they've been married?

Wasn't it Columbus's discovery of America? And the guy was supposed to be American, though the actor (yes, I for got his name) was actually Canadian...

Ferris

Quote from: SteK on October 24, 2019, 04:54:18 PM
Wasn't it Columbus's discovery of America? And the guy was supposed to be American, though the actor (yes, I for got his name) was actually Canadian...

That would be 1492. As for why 1485 - no idea. It's just a random year that sounds funny in how specific it is.

Bennett Brauer

I don't think it is a random year though, as I said before. Tudors/Stuarts 1485-1603/1714 was always a fixed period for study in secondary and tertiary education, 1485 in Britain generally taken to be the end of the Middle Ages.