Author Topic: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling  (Read 2018 times)

Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« on: July 06, 2019, 03:03:46 PM »
Please advise on how to do this with zero risk and guaranteed gains, thank you. I will consider all advice. I will be staking my entire savings on this.

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #1 on: July 06, 2019, 03:06:13 PM »
Do matched betting but punt the freebies. Longer term it will even out, but if you're lucky early on you might get ahead of the curve a bit. Check the t&cs for turnover requirements though.

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #2 on: July 06, 2019, 03:09:51 PM »
One of my pals does ok betting on horses but then laying the opposite result on betfair so if he loses he gets most of his money back.

seepage

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #3 on: July 06, 2019, 03:10:05 PM »
All on Lucky Boy in the 15.30 at Kempton Park.

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #4 on: July 06, 2019, 03:11:10 PM »
All on Lucky Boy in the 15.30 at Kempton Park.

I was going to go for Sad Ken.

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #5 on: July 06, 2019, 03:18:30 PM »
Poker.

Never bet against house. Always bet against idiot humans. However, be aware that some of those idiots are really good at poker.

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #6 on: July 06, 2019, 03:24:08 PM »
I knew a guy who used to earn a bit by betting on the amount of goals in football games. He’d spend ages researching teams and leagues across Europe so he had a database to help him predict which games would be high-scoring based on the teams’ form, league positions, tactical styles, attacking and defensive strength, etc.

It seemed like a lot of hard work but he seemed to do alright off it.

Well when I say ”seemed to”, he just used to say he was winning. He may well have been spouting bollocks and is now lying destitute in a ditch somewhere in Dewsbury, off his tits on Cillit Bang cocktails. That’s life!

thenoise

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #7 on: July 06, 2019, 03:28:16 PM »
Be really really lucky.

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #8 on: July 06, 2019, 03:34:49 PM »
Go for one of those 50/50 games (red vs black on the roulette wheel), then gamble a quid on red. If you win, you’re up a quid. If you lose, you gamble 2 quid on red again. If that wins, you get your previous bet back, plus you’re up a quid. If you lose, bet 4 quid on red. If you win, you’re up overall, if you lose, bet 8 quid on red...

....etc etc. When you win, go back to start and do this again.

If you are absurdly unlucky, you could lose a load of 50/50s in a row and be unable to fund the next double that wins your money back, so be sure to have infinite money if you do this.

Rizla

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #9 on: July 06, 2019, 04:01:09 PM »
Go for one of those 50/50 games (red vs black on the roulette wheel), then gamble a quid on red. If you win, you’re up a quid. If you lose, you gamble 2 quid on red again. If that wins, you get your previous bet back, plus you’re up a quid. If you lose, bet 4 quid on red. If you win, you’re up overall, if you lose, bet 8 quid on red...

....etc etc. When you win, go back to start and do this again.

If you are absurdly unlucky, you could lose a load of 50/50s in a row and be unable to fund the next double that wins your money back, so be sure to have infinite money if you do this.
Ah yes, that's my "system". I managed to profit 80 quid or thereabouts last month, by staying up all night doing this with 50p stakes. Cashed out 3/4s of it then tried again the following night - again got up to 80 odd quid then, jizzed it all when I got 12 reds in a row.

My finest moment as a "punter" came back in february, when this ludicrous ten-fold came good. £841, from a £1 stake. Keep the stakes low but dream big, I say.

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #10 on: July 06, 2019, 04:10:48 PM »
Fuck it all into a gutter then commit a crime on someone else's human body

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #11 on: July 06, 2019, 04:13:18 PM »
Fuck it all into a gutter then commit a crime on someone else's human body

Sorry thought this was the spicy food thread

petrilTanaka

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #12 on: July 06, 2019, 04:16:05 PM »
learn to code and get a job working for a puggy company. Easiest 3 grand I ever made for two month's temp work

BlodwynPig

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #13 on: July 06, 2019, 04:51:21 PM »
RIP John McCririck

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #14 on: July 06, 2019, 05:04:51 PM »
Put all your money in a disused gasometer.

thenoise

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #15 on: July 06, 2019, 05:41:40 PM »
Invest in 'emerging markets'.

Dex Sawash

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #16 on: July 06, 2019, 05:45:38 PM »
You're looking at the wrong end of the business. Titbo was able to retire.

thenoise

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #17 on: July 06, 2019, 05:46:01 PM »
Go for one of those 50/50 games (red vs black on the roulette wheel), then gamble a quid on red. If you win, you’re up a quid. If you lose, you gamble 2 quid on red again. If that wins, you get your previous bet back, plus you’re up a quid. If you lose, bet 4 quid on red. If you win, you’re up overall, if you lose, bet 8 quid on red...

....etc etc. When you win, go back to start and do this again.

If you are absurdly unlucky, you could lose a load of 50/50s in a row and be unable to fund the next double that wins your money back, so be sure to have infinite money if you do this.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martingale_(betting_system)

There are flaws even if you have infinite money - probability of red/black is slightly less than 50% due to 00, and casinos have limits on the amount that you can bet (which you very quickly exceed following this method).

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #18 on: July 06, 2019, 06:02:07 PM »
Try to only bet on things where you know what the outcome will be.

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #19 on: July 06, 2019, 07:31:55 PM »
The Martingale system works well enough if you have a good bankroll, keep your starting bets low and don’t chase it for too long - set a goal and quit while you’re ahead.  I’ve only been wiped out once and that was with a $100 bankroll making $2 bets - not a great ratio.  You really want at least a $1k bankroll making $10 bets so the reward is higher, encouraging you to reach a decent goal and quit earlier.  The chances of hitting a bad enough streak to wipe out that bankroll are possible, but pretty slim.  Never get cocky and start making additional bets, stick to the system exactly.

I don’t know if I’d do this online, though.

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #20 on: July 06, 2019, 08:24:59 PM »
Isn't part of the issue with these ideas about how to gamble successfully how.to avoid getting addicted? My advice would.be not to get involved in gambling at all. Sorry if I'm shitting on this thread.

Twed

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #21 on: July 06, 2019, 08:29:38 PM »
If there was a system that worked then our entire economy would collapse.

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #22 on: July 06, 2019, 08:51:37 PM »
You're looking at the wrong end of the business. Titbo was able to retire.

Biggy's retired? On investments?

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #23 on: July 06, 2019, 08:52:20 PM »
Do matched betting but punt the freebies. Longer term it will even out, but if you're lucky early on you might get ahead of the curve a bit. Check the t&cs for turnover requirements though.

Don't do this, but do do matched betting. You can rack up a couple of thousand easily before bookies start to exclude you from offers. Just lose too many accounts before Cheltenham festival as that's particularly profitable.

But don't actually gamble with the aim of making money because that's fucking stupid.

seepage

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #24 on: July 06, 2019, 09:01:08 PM »
An old boss said "Falklands shares, mate, UK never gonna pull out" (actually in a very posh Nigel Havers voice).

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #25 on: July 06, 2019, 09:08:37 PM »
matched betting, exploiting casino and bookmaker offers... punt the freebies if you like, saves time. the sign-ups are basically free money. After that you diversify. Currently I'm value betting sportsbook boosts.

it's easy to make money when you start, gets harder as bookmakers start to exclude you from offers, limit your stakes, and basically fuck you away like some nasty-ass fly.

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #26 on: July 06, 2019, 09:55:39 PM »
https://www.bonusbagging.co.uk/, it costs under 30 quid and they send you precise step by step instructions to take advantage of all the bonuses that the online bookies offer new customers. You can do it by yourself too, basically it involves betting against yourself on Betfair so you cancel out any potential losses and the fact that you're using a free bonus gives you an advantage so you always end up ahead if you know what you're doing. But it's worth paying the £27 because they tell you exactly what to do and precisely what bets to make, and how to avoid falling foul of wagering requirements and such like (where you have to bet the amount of the bonus multiple times before you can withdraw your winnings).

There's loads of upselling too for more expensive products, but this is a good entry-level one and you can probably make a grand or two (I think I ended about £1500 up) before diminishing returns make it not worth doing any more.

seepage

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Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #27 on: July 06, 2019, 09:58:21 PM »
I think I'm going to attempt to write a children's book instead.

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #28 on: July 06, 2019, 10:54:50 PM »
I'm writing a children's book that will teach them how to exploit casino offers. It's called Charlie The Bonus Abuser Gets Banned From Skybet.

Re: Making terrific amounts of money via online gambling
« Reply #29 on: July 06, 2019, 11:02:44 PM »
I'd definitely recommend oddsmonkey over bonusbagging, I think you get more bang for your buck, plus cruikshank's not to be trusted imo. He tries to sell you stuff you don't need, when there are better versions available cheaper elsewhere.