Author Topic: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?  (Read 2979 times)

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #30 on: July 08, 2019, 04:29:58 PM »
A difference between myself now and myself writing on these forums some 7 or 8 years back, I also now feel like a lot of men are unself-aware creeps... largely from reading all the many, many responses to the Aziz Ansari story that said he did nothing wrong and clearly didn't commit assault, when he ignored multiple 'nos' and indications of 'no' to a degree beyond myself or what I had imagined most men would be capable of. It really brought home to me the fact that people's internal definitions are often scarily apart.


EDIT: For instance, if you're so inclined, consider the top-voted responses to this recent A.V. Club article:
https://news.avclub.com/aziz-ansari-is-getting-a-new-netflix-special-next-week-1836024273

St_Eddie

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #31 on: July 08, 2019, 05:06:29 PM »
Interesting how calling out sexism is apparently something wrong to do, if only it's sexist against men.  Interesting that.

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #32 on: July 08, 2019, 05:06:57 PM »

Twed

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #33 on: July 08, 2019, 05:09:10 PM »
Interesting how calling out sexism is apparently something wrong to do, if only it's sexist against men.  Interesting that.
Get offended if somebody is shitty to a man, sure, but addressing it like it's the same thing as institutionalised misogyny or racism is going to get the short shrift it deserves.

Please understand this. It is not okay to be shitty to some white man named Nigel, but also do not expect society to care about his cause.

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #34 on: July 08, 2019, 05:09:56 PM »
Interesting how calling out sexism is apparently something wrong to do, if only it's sexist against men.  Interesting that.


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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #35 on: July 08, 2019, 05:17:24 PM »
I was sexually assaulted at university (scratched at and then punched in the face and then while in a somewhat dazed, scared and submissive state, physically forced to go down on someone until she was satisfied). We had been going out for a couple of weeks at this point, and perhaps not too surprisingly I was terrified of her after that. It took me a while to stand up to her (she didn't acknowledge or apologise for what she had done), but after a few weeks of constant dread and relentless self-harm (seeing as this happened to me that it felt like it must have been my fault, such was the vulnerable thought process), I eventually stood up to her and broke up with her.

I'm not saying that this is connected to my subsequent one night stands or awkward encounters where perhaps once or twice I have been seeking affection from someone I share a bed with in a non-sexual and certainly non-predatory way, but nevertheless I look upon those encounters and on reflection wish I hadn't bothered. I'm still friends with those people and in most cases we still share a bed if they stay over with zero-awkwardness, but I can certainly recall times where in hindsight I could have been perhaps less needy, for want of a better word.


chveik

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #36 on: July 08, 2019, 05:21:57 PM »
Interesting how calling out sexism is apparently something wrong to do, if only it's sexist against men.  Interesting that.

sigh

not this again


this was a particularly stupid thread to make OP.

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #37 on: July 08, 2019, 05:23:26 PM »
I was sexually assaulted at university (scratched at and then punched in the face and then while in a somewhat dazed, scared and submissive state, physically forced to go down on someone until she was satisfied). We had been going out for a couple of weeks at this point, and perhaps not too surprisingly I was terrified of her after that. It took me a while to stand up to her (she didn't acknowledge or apologise for what she had done), but after a few weeks of constant dread and relentless self-harm (seeing as this happened to me that it felt like it must have been my fault, such was the vulnerable thought process), I eventually stood up to her and broke up with her.

Sorry to read that - sounds really scary. I've been badgered into things and been touched/manhandled without my permission quite a lot... so I definitely know that women and girls can be coercive, but I've fortunately never experienced anything sexually that made me feel scared - more pissed off, disappointed or anxious.

In terms of strangers, it's happened the most when I've worn a kilt - make of that what one will.

Ambient Sheep

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #38 on: July 08, 2019, 05:28:20 PM »
Yes, in my experience (witnessing it only) men in kilts get a LOT of attention from women, not always wanted.

Maybe the flipside of the "Well they were dressed like that, they were asking for it" nonsense?

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #39 on: July 08, 2019, 05:29:20 PM »
Get offended if somebody is shitty to a man, sure, but addressing it like it's the same thing as institutionalised misogyny or racism is going to get the short shrift it deserves.

Please understand this. It is not okay to be shitty to some white man named Nigel, but also do not expect society to care about his cause.

So it's okay to say "men really are disgusting" as a blanket statement?  Why is that okay?  How is that not sexist?  I genuinely don't understand.  Why not phrase it as "some men really are disgusting", or better yet "some people really are disgusting".  What good does it do to make judgements of character based upon gender?

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #40 on: July 08, 2019, 05:30:02 PM »
Maybe the flipside of the "Well they were dressed like that, they were asking for it" nonsense?

Irritatingly one of my female friends at the time - who is a committed feminist and has done good work at a rape crisis centre - almost literally said just that to me. People can have some weird and frustrating blind-spots.

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #41 on: July 08, 2019, 05:32:12 PM »
So it's okay to say "men really are disgusting" as a blanket statement?  Why is that okay?  How is that not sexist?  I genuinely don't understand.  Why not phrase it as "some men really are disgusting", or better yet "some people really are disgusting".  What good does it do to make judgements of character based upon gender?

Adam Cadre wrote a two-part blog article on this, which received some push-back. I think it's still a worthwhile account however b/c it demonstrates the psychological place that a good faith 'not all men' argument comes from, even if such an argument can miss the wood from the trees:
http://adamcadre.ac/calendar/14/14723.html

Twed

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #42 on: July 08, 2019, 05:35:16 PM »
Why not phrase it as "some men really are disgusting", or better yet "some people really are disgusting".  What good does it do to make judgements of character based upon gender?
Because the "some" is implicit and understood, and also it's useful for exposing the kind of people who say things like "not all men" or "I'm one of the good ones", and because it is true that as a white man you have freedoms that are institutionally racist and sexist, no matter how good you are.

St_Eddie

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #43 on: July 08, 2019, 05:36:27 PM »
Adam Cadre wrote a two-part blog article on this, which received some push-back. I think it's still a worthwhile account however b/c it demonstrates the psychological place that a good faith 'not all men' argument comes from, even if such an argument can miss the wood from the trees:
http://adamcadre.ac/calendar/14/14723.html

Great blog.  Thanks for sharing.  I agree with him.

Because the "some" is implicit and understood...

No, it's not.  I didn't find it implicit at all.  Sorry for not "understanding" how basic language works, I guess.  It would take less than a second to add the qualifier of 'some' to the statement in question, so why not do just that?  As the blog pointed out, would it be okay to make a statement like that, in regards to ethnicity?  "Black people really are disgusting".  "Oh, what's that?  You're black and you took offence.  Oh, sorry but that's on you.  I think that you'll find that the generalisation of that statement was implicit".

I call out sexism, racism and prejudice wherever I see it and no amount of tedious '#NotAllMen' gifs, posted in an attempt to automatically shut down all possible debate and stop reasoned critique, is going to make me feel bad for doing so.

...it's useful for exposing the kind of people who say things like "not all men" or "I'm one of the good ones", and because it is true that as a white man you have freedoms that are institutionally racist and sexist, no matter how good you are.

I said that not all men are like that because not all men are like that and as such, it's unfair to brand all men as "disgusting" and unless people add a qualifier, then that's exactly what they're doing.  It's even offensive to imply that the majority of men are like that, quite frankly.  You seem to be arguing that provided the target is not institutionally oppressed, then they're fair game for racist and sexist remarks?  Sorry, I must have missed the memo where it was suddenly declared that two wrongs do make a right.
« Last Edit: July 08, 2019, 06:11:18 PM by St_Eddie »

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #44 on: July 08, 2019, 06:00:10 PM »
Fucks sake of all the people to end up stirring this debate again

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #45 on: July 08, 2019, 06:08:58 PM »
Fucks sake of all the people to end up stirring this debate again

What do you mean by that?

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #46 on: July 08, 2019, 06:09:51 PM »
I don't even understand what this thread is a reference to.

Zetetic

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #47 on: July 08, 2019, 06:13:38 PM »
I can certainly recall times where in hindsight I could have been perhaps less needy, for want of a better word.

Mmm. (Regarding myself to be clear, not dct.)

Mind you, that's in all sorts of ways.

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #48 on: July 08, 2019, 06:14:25 PM »
You know what, purely in the interests of not giving Neil any further stress at this time, I'm bowing out of this thread.

Twed

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #49 on: July 08, 2019, 06:14:56 PM »
St Eddie, you have used the topic for discussing the systematic rape of children as a platform for discussing men having to be talked about in a way that isn't your favourite way.  Use that as a basis for understanding what others have pointed out is a concept you are way out of your depth on and that is a waste of time for us to try to teach you about here.

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #50 on: July 08, 2019, 06:16:46 PM »
Good decision, Ed. It's been done to death. Save yourself and everyone from raking over this stuff. It ain't the thread to raise those questions, either.




Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #51 on: July 08, 2019, 06:17:35 PM »
proof men are good:

- invented "the ladder"
- Frankie & Benny: both men
- lovely cup of tea; invented by men
- the gregorian calendar - the GREG or IAN calendar
- Coca Cola - man
- The Beatles - all men. If BlodwynPig, Ozric Tentacles - all men, except Brandi

Ambient Sheep

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #52 on: July 08, 2019, 06:21:59 PM »
Good decision, Ed. It's been done to death. Save yourself and everyone from raking over this stuff.

Yup!

Now all we need to do is convince gout_pony that he really isn't a rapist paedophile.  Chances are slim, I'm afraid...

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #53 on: July 08, 2019, 06:23:22 PM »
Gout_Pony, you're not a paedophile rapist. Unless you have actually raped a child at some point, as opposed to "having sex with someone who is of the age of consent", which is what you appear to have actually done.

If you have raped a child at some point you obviously are a paedophile rapist, and - in my personal opinion - I think that's a bit rum.

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #54 on: July 08, 2019, 06:26:06 PM »
The only good things I can think about about men:

- Subway (short for Sub Wayne, he invent the subwich)
- DJ Sneak - U Can't Hide From Your Bud: https://youtu.be/khlP5NVwE4c
- Ferrari Testarossa
- OutRun 2
- Enzo Ferrari
- Last Wave from OutRun: https://youtu.be/oBg8O0rVkps

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #55 on: July 08, 2019, 06:28:40 PM »
Yeah I do hope mr pony stops thinking he is a paedophile rapist when he clearly isn't.


Twed

  • I need you so, Medieval Zone, you don't need me
Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #56 on: July 08, 2019, 06:32:07 PM »
Yes. If she was fine with the situation then you're probably just taking a good sexual experience away from somebody and framing it as a statutory rape, which could upset that person. "By the way, when were young and had sex that was actually you being raped". Would you find it acceptable to tell a partner that the sex you had was actually rape? Calling consensual sex rape makes it so.

You are inviting harm, man. Drop it.

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #57 on: July 08, 2019, 06:32:37 PM »
The only good things I can think about about men:

- Subway (short for Sub Wayne, he invent the subwich)
- DJ Sneak - U Can't Hide From Your Bud: https://youtu.be/khlP5NVwE4c
- Ferrari Testarossa
- OutRun 2
- Enzo Ferrari
- Last Wave from OutRun: https://youtu.be/oBg8O0rVkps

- MONSTER ENERGEY DRINK
- Carrer a Mountain Bike

Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #58 on: July 08, 2019, 06:40:05 PM »
Good decision, Ed. It's been done to death. Save yourself and everyone from raking over this stuff. It ain't the thread to raise those questions, either.

TBC and his hidden Muslim agenda...

earl_sleek

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Re: Have you ever sexually assaulted an underage girl, or any woman?
« Reply #59 on: July 08, 2019, 06:43:01 PM »
I've written before in the past about wrongly having a relationship with a 16/17-year-old underage girl when I was a few years older

REALLY MATE HAVE YOU


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