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Cricket 2019 part II: arise King Jofra

Started by sevendaughters, August 22, 2019, 12:30:16 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Shoulders?-Stomach!


Thursday

Poor lad. Honestly, it is appalling, but I just feel bad for him really, because I can completely imagining it happening to me.

Admittedly, I'm not a professional cricket, but still.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

https://youtu.be/qWtCUKwaTgU

This drop was about a thousand times more difficult to fuck up.

Much funnier two given it was rotund full AIDS era apartheid rebel Gatting.

sevendaughters

only excuse I can give is that the game had zero intensity and he was probably half asleep.

still: shite.

sevendaughters

thought this was a fairly terrible test series actually. NZ and England have been really closely matched in all forms for about a decade now and the T20 series was a great igniting of the battle that left off in the World Cup. the 2015 NZ tour of England was probably my favourite non-Ashes home summer of cricket (and the 2013 tour was pretty great too). two solid teams with decent quicks and a couple of star bats apiece and some flaky fucks. perfect recipe.

just shows how important it is to have a decent strip to play on. we gave the Aussies 4 results wickets (Old Trafford is always a bit slow and low) and to hell with the consequences regarding how many days it goes or who might win.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Yeah the NZs aren't thick. They know how much we struggle to make inroads on flat surfaces and weren't going to give Archer any help. They rightly concluded their batting is better and they were always gonna edge it at home.

It did make for a dull couple of tests, but why should they care. It's not like they were packing out stadia, and the Barmy Army were locked in to attending.


druss

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on December 02, 2019, 11:23:54 PM
https://youtu.be/qWtCUKwaTgU

This drop was about a thousand times more difficult to fuck up.

Much funnier two given it was rotund full AIDS era apartheid rebel Gatting.
Gatting at least had the excuse of sun in his eyes.

It was a bit of an old-fashioned win by NZ. Make sure you can't lose rather than going for attacking wins.

Quote

RIP Bob Willis

He'll be moaning in heaven now.

iamcoop

Quote from: Quote on December 04, 2019, 04:21:48 PM
RIP Bob Willis

He'll be moaning in heaven now.

It's a shame. People took the piss out of his dour style but once Boycott dies as well will there be any pundits left that are willing to stick the boot in when England play Aids-tier cricket? Vaughan does it occasionally but I think we're gonna be left with mundane "take the positives" style commentary.

Quote

Yeah, I didn't mean to slag him off.

He was usually correct in his lambasting of braindead play or lack of application. Wasn't afraid to upset big names by pointing out they were playing poorly either.


Shoulders?-Stomach!

RIP Bob.

Wish I could remember his bowling heyday and not his dull negativity.

In the 1981 Headingley test he always is described as bowling like a man possessed, mainly by people unaware that he always ran like that and bowled with that cranky action.

sevendaughters

love that he added the middle name 'Dylan' because he was such a fan. Wonder if he was later in life. You usually don't turn on Bob.

his List A bowling record is very good. slower game then but averages 20.

Shoulders?-Stomach!


Shoulders?-Stomach!

Between 30p and £5 for most seats at Pakistan's comeback home test.

Really hammered home how long the absence was when I read Azhar has played 0 of his 75 tests in Pakistan.

sevendaughters

would love to go and see a test in every country. a mate of mine has, except Pakistan and Afghanistan.

spotted the USA were back playing alright again the other day and at least 4 of their lads were homegrown.

iamcoop

So it appears Moeen has decided to fuck off test cricket for the foreseeable future. Complete AIDS with the bat but that's fucked us for a half competent spinner no. As much as I love the fucking slaphead he can't bowl spin very well can he?

sevendaughters

I think Moeen is just happier on the T20 and county circuit. He was meant to be burned out when he dropped out of the test side and then he went and smashed and bowled Worcestershire into another major final. Let's face it, whatever lessons we've apparently learned from The Edge, the England dressing room is still one that favours militaristic public schoolboys or those with colossal self-esteem.

Leach and Parkinson in Sri Lanka could be good, I think. Parky gives it a rip while Leach is a good control bowler.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: iamcoop on December 10, 2019, 02:14:32 PM
So it appears Moeen has decided to fuck off test cricket for the foreseeable future. Complete AIDS with the bat but that's fucked us for a half competent spinner no. As much as I love the fucking slaphead he can't bowl spin very well can he?

Stats wise, one of the worst records of English all rounders to have played so many tests. Fooled a few sides with his spin at home, started off OK with the bat. But been toilet for a long time.

sevendaughters

also Leach averages under 30 thus far and considering he's had no gimme opponents it bodes well. he's like a better Ashley Giles - a team man who can hold an end and take wickets.

sevendaughters

decent start to home life again for Pakistan. When I had a look at lunch Sri Lanka were coasting. seems that the 16 year old Shah is a real talent. was looking up averages and wickets in the recent PAK domestic season and he was the dominant quick. there was an old left arm orthodox bowler who took tons of wickets, but it seems like the entire tournament was played on roads and two of the top bats were Salman Butt and Kamran Akmal.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Leach did OK in SL last time, starting his early career in South Africa and NZ is a tough assignment though.

Generally he is quite far ahead of guys like Bess, Parkinson and Virdi, and we really shouldn't go back to Dawson type cricketers. He has got bottle and as said above, decent holding bowler if he gets a chance. Will get lots of 2-56 and 3-80 type performances but won't often run through sides.

sevendaughters

Leach's worst return as a bowler came against Ireland (admittedly didn't have much to do).

Inspector Norse

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on December 10, 2019, 10:36:22 PM
Stats wise, one of the worst records of English all rounders to have played so many tests. Fooled a few sides with his spin at home, started off OK with the bat. But been toilet for a long time.

He picked up a lot of wickets, but leaked like a toddler with rotovirus, and on far too many occasions was ineffective when he should have been key.

Glad for Moeen that he's been put on retroviral leave, guy has been covered in lesions for years. Maybe now he can get the treatment he deserves for his years of service and the chemical castration necessary for having so much time around this squad and their...tendencies.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Basically for tests we should fuck that generation off and move on. They're already old, no improvement is likely. No more Ali or Bairstow making palliative care strata decisions. Get em gone. Out.

Start the tests with the approach we took with the one day side. Take a few losses but build up resilience and work out the best players capable of churning out a gameplan without having pant shitting AIDS tremors. Build around Burns Victim, Root, Stokes and Archer.

sevendaughters

Cricinfo are putting out the call for test team of the decade. I went for

Cook
Warner
Williamson (c)
Smith
Sangakkara
Stokes
de Kock (wk)
Cummins
Rabada
Anderson
Herath

subs: Gayle, Amla, Pietersen, Ryan Harris, Ajmal, Tremlett, Philander, Kallis, Watling.

Some notes: the best average by a proper test opener this decade, min. 1000 runs? Chris Gayle.

Jacques Kallis is a better player than Stokes but I also want to watch this team play.

Also I don't like Virat Kohli.


Inspector Norse

Pretty weak tail there, Philander in for Rabada might help even if he'd be injured every other game.

Watling in for de Kock too or give Sangakkara the gloves and hold your nose and pick Kohli.

de Villiers and Steyn disappointed not to be there. The latter raising his eyebrows at being left out in favour of Tremlett.