Author Topic: Stupid questions you always wanted answering  (Read 3768 times)

Mr_Simnock

  • BREXIT? what brexit
Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« on: September 05, 2019, 11:59:35 PM »
Today at work I had a burning desire to get the answer to - If I marry my friends mum and he marries my mum then how are we related? We can't both be each others dads, sons and brother in laws at the same time can we? For all your questions you thought too daft to ask then bring them here, someone might be able to help.

Lordofthefiles

  • A dog with two dicks or a dick with two dogs
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #1 on: September 06, 2019, 12:00:59 AM »
Where did Noah keep the woodpeckers?

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #2 on: September 06, 2019, 12:02:06 AM »
Toy-boys-in-law.

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #3 on: September 06, 2019, 12:06:01 AM »
Where did Noah keep the woodpeckers?

Don't discount the beaver problem.

Lordofthefiles

  • A dog with two dicks or a dick with two dogs
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #4 on: September 06, 2019, 12:08:19 AM »
Don't discount the beaver problem.

He had Mrs. Noah for that.

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #5 on: September 06, 2019, 12:11:14 AM »
He had Mrs. Noah for that.

Back of the net.

touchingcloth

  • Member
  • **
  • She is hot in the arse.
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #6 on: September 06, 2019, 12:51:59 AM »
I'd they don't put shoes on horses, what's the worst that could happen?

pancreas

  • The islets of Langerhans are the very best islets
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #7 on: September 06, 2019, 12:53:35 AM »
They won't get into Fabric for a start.

Cerys

  • Bionic-Arsed
  • Golden Member
  • *****
  • Cyber Engineered Ravaged Yakking System
    • The Brainwrongs of Cerys
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #8 on: September 06, 2019, 12:56:12 AM »
The horses' hooves get split.  Imagine a broken nail on each and every toe, only worse.

touchingcloth

  • Member
  • **
  • She is hot in the arse.
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #9 on: September 06, 2019, 01:14:24 AM »
Don't discount the beaver problem.
Where did Noah keep the woodpeckers?

Coming from a church background, the stuff literalists believe about the ark is mental.

Regarding the objective lack of space, people will say that it was "kinds" of animals rather than species. How did the ark work with lions, tigers, cheetahs and leopards prowling about the place? Pair of tabby cats, mate.

Regarding the fact that they are also compelled to believe that humans and dinosaurs existed at the same time, and questions about how they avoided being eaten or capsized by ten million tons of T Rexs and the like, they'll say they took baby dinosaurs, or eggs.

On questions of what animals with restrictive carnivorous diets would have been fed, I've heard explanations that God magicked their stomachs to allow to eat veg and grains.

Even if the lions could eat oats but still fancied chowing down on a bit of zebra, some say that God also magicked the animals to behave peacefully.

I reckon it was real, though.

touchingcloth

  • Member
  • **
  • She is hot in the arse.
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #10 on: September 06, 2019, 01:14:58 AM »
The horses' hooves get split.  Imagine a broken nail on each and every toe, only worse.

How did they cope for the millions of years before farriers arrived on the scene?

Twit 2

  • Penske material
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #11 on: September 06, 2019, 01:17:50 AM »
sleds

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #12 on: September 06, 2019, 01:22:34 AM »
How did they cope for the millions of years before farriers arrived on the scene?

Because like most domesticated animals, the type of horses that wear shoes are grotesque mutants that would quickly die horrible deaths in the wild.

Cerys

  • Bionic-Arsed
  • Golden Member
  • *****
  • Cyber Engineered Ravaged Yakking System
    • The Brainwrongs of Cerys
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #13 on: September 06, 2019, 01:28:52 AM »
How did they cope for the millions of years before farriers arrived on the scene?

By not having to canter along roads for hours.

touchingcloth

  • Member
  • **
  • She is hot in the arse.
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #14 on: September 06, 2019, 02:03:59 AM »
By not having to canter along roads for hours.

The cunts deserve split hooves if they're going to go cantering around like long faced jebs.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

  • It rubs the lotion on its skin
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #15 on: September 06, 2019, 02:13:01 AM »
Who is your Daddy, and what does he do?

Shoulders?-Stomach!

  • Are we human? Or are we toilet
    • http://jackanderton.jamendo.net/
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #16 on: September 06, 2019, 06:11:38 AM »
Epic cantz mate

Cantersaurus Rex

Ted Canterblast

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #17 on: September 06, 2019, 09:07:43 AM »
I had a Spanish friend with a cat she didn't let out, because in Spain there's loads of strays and the risk of it catching FIDS (cat AIDS) is high.

Although we have fewer strays, there must be some and other domestic cats could carry it, so how come it's not a big thing here?

imitationleather

  • "The French... are famous... for their kissing"
    • http://last.fm/user/ImiLeathr
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #18 on: September 06, 2019, 09:11:16 AM »
I had a Spanish friend with a cat she didn't let out, because in Spain there's loads of strays and the risk of it catching FIDS (cat AIDS) is high.

Although we have fewer strays, there must be some and other domestic cats could carry it, so how come it's not a big thing here?

Cats here get vaccinated against it.

So while our cats don't have AIDS, they are autistic.

touchingcloth

  • Member
  • **
  • She is hot in the arse.
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #19 on: September 06, 2019, 09:22:38 AM »
I had a Spanish friend with a cat she didn't let out, because in Spain there's loads of strays and the risk of it catching FIDS (cat AIDS) is high.

Although we have fewer strays, there must be some and other domestic cats could carry it, so how come it's not a big thing here?

If it's anything like Portugal, the stray population will be a lot higher than in the UK because of the lack of sterilisation. It's incredibly common for Portuguese people not to have their animals neutered because of a perception that it will emasculate them in some essential rather than literal sense (a dog with no balls is no son of mine). Spaying is a whole other level of expense to neutering so even in the UK many people don't bother due to males being pretty much universally neutered outside of fuck farms, so potentially there are just more tom cats prowling about and lobbing their AIDS into all who they meet.

Potentially your friend (or YOU) could have mixed up FIDS with feline leukaemia. FIDS is similarly difficult to contract as AIDS to my understanding, in that cats can't catch it from the cat equivalent of a toilet seat and it has to be through swapping spunk or blood. Leukemia is very common in stray cats here because it's a lot easier to transfer (a domestic cat can contract it if an infected stray has used their food or water bowl, for instance) and no one is curing the strays because who can afford that, and no one is culling them because it's a nation of animal lovers and who could afford it anyway?

Cats here get vaccinated against it.

Speaking Portugal rather than Spain again, they get vaccinated here as well. There's just a lot more strays.

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #20 on: September 06, 2019, 10:02:00 AM »
So how come they can vaccinate cat aids but not human aids? Sounds like people need to get their priorities right.

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #21 on: September 06, 2019, 10:04:38 AM »
On analogue TV sets that aren't tuned in, why doesn't the presumably random white noise ever form patterns or clumps?  I once stared at it for ages as a kid hoping something would appear in a monkeys typing Shakespeare kind of way, but it never did.

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #22 on: September 06, 2019, 10:06:51 AM »
On analogue TV sets that aren't tuned in, why doesn't the presumably random white noise ever form patterns or clumps?  I once stared at it for ages as a kid hoping something would appear in a monkeys typing Shakespeare kind of way, but it never did.

It actually does if you look at it right, like one of them magic eye things. You must not be able to see them.

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #23 on: September 06, 2019, 10:11:32 AM »
....
« Last Edit: September 08, 2019, 12:14:12 AM by Barry Admin »

Johnny Yesno

  • Injecting the rivers with stainless steel fish
    • Lines Horizontal
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #24 on: September 07, 2019, 12:03:58 PM »
Toy-boys-in-law.

Fine. Where did Noah keep the Toy-boys-in-law?

Johnny Yesno

  • Injecting the rivers with stainless steel fish
    • Lines Horizontal
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #25 on: September 07, 2019, 12:08:45 PM »
On analogue TV sets that aren't tuned in, why doesn't the presumably random white noise ever form patterns or clumps?  I once stared at it for ages as a kid hoping something would appear in a monkeys typing Shakespeare kind of way, but it never did.

It's random, not chaotic.

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #26 on: September 07, 2019, 12:48:16 PM »
So how come they can vaccinate cat aids but not human aids? Sounds like people need to get their priorities right.
Boring answer to a probably not-serious question: no-one’s managed to develop an HIV vaccine with a decent rate of protection. Also, the mechanism of the current FIV vaccines mean that the cat produces the corresponding antibodies for a few years afterwards, with the result that they test positive for FIV. Whilst this is manageable for a pet being given a vaccination on a risk-basis, there’d probably be logistical issues if large human populations were to suddenly gain HIV+ status.

Zetetic

  • Burying isn't the same as killing.
Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #27 on: September 07, 2019, 01:51:43 PM »
We do have "pre-exposure prophylaxis" (PrEP) for HIV, it's worth noting.

But that's just constantly taking antivirals, and even if you stick to the regime it doesn't seem to be perfect. (Expensive as interventions go as well.)

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #28 on: September 07, 2019, 03:50:08 PM »
Also, we might not have a vaccine, but cats can get FIV just from being bitten, so swings and roundabouts.

Re: Stupid questions you always wanted answering
« Reply #29 on: September 08, 2019, 01:24:58 PM »
We do have "pre-exposure prophylaxis" (PrEP) for HIV, it's worth noting.

But that's just constantly taking antivirals, and even if you stick to the regime it doesn't seem to be perfect. (Expensive as interventions go as well.)

On my last visit to the clap clinic (all clear btw in case anyone wants to bang) the consultant said that syphilis was on the rise because of PrEP: people are taking it so they can visit eastern europe (in particular Romania)  and have bareback sex without the risk of HIV.

Thinking about it I am not sure if he meant they were visiting Romanian girls here or going as sex tourists. Either way, I said "they sound like idiots " and he nodded before swabbing my japs eye and giving me a thumbs up.

Glad I now know what PrEP stands for.