Stupid questions you always wanted answering

[touchingcloth]

On my last visit to the clap clinic (all clear btw in case anyone wants to bang) the consultant said that syphilis was on the rise because of PrEP: people are taking it so they can visit eastern europe (in particular Romania)  and have bareback sex without the risk of HIV.

Thinking about it I am not sure if he meant they were visiting Romanian girls here or going as sex tourists. Either way, I said "they sound like idiots " and he nodded before swabbing my japs eye and giving me a thumbs up.

Glad I now know what PrEP stands for.

What's wrong with that? I often use PrEP because I have a predilection for pre-operative Romanian hookers but an aversion to AIDS.

Also, we might not have a vaccine, but cats can get FIV just from being bitten, so swings and roundabouts.

If you got bitten by an AIDS with an ulcer you could. Happy to help experiment some time if you'd like.

[bgmnts]

Fair play risking syphilis just to not wear a condom is a real dedication to cuntiness.

[Zetetic]

Pretty small numbers receiving PrEP, I thought?

But, yes, amongst those receiving it, chlamydia, gonorrhoea and syphilis do seem an issue.
Out of about 840 people receiving it in Wales since mid-2017, the figures now seem to be about 110, 140 and 25 respectively. (No HIV.)

But since you'd target people having risky sex, who'd otherwise be risking HIV, I suppose that's unsurprising.

[touchingcloth]

Today I wondered idly whether Josef Fritzl's wife had received a criminal record or a prison sentence. She hadn't, so my thought changed to "why wasn't Fritzl's wife charged with anything", which wasn't a set of google searches which I expected to take me to places filled with more anti-Semitic conspiracy theories than the Labour party's website.

Was anyone familiar enough with the case at the time to know how she came off as credible when she said she was unaware of anything going on in her cellar? That seems to be the state of things, but I imagine prosecutors must have given her a good old grilling at the time beyond just "come on, now, are you sure you never noticed anything?"

If any answers could avoid talking about Jewishness that'd be great.

[EBGB]

If I am sarcastic, I display / perform sarcasm.  Ditto:
ironic / irony
pedantic / pedantry
parodic / parody

etc.

But if I'm sardonic?  Sardony comes back as an infrequent but viable option via googling.  Yet I've NEVER heard or seen it used.  WTF is that about?  Or is there a better option than sardony which is used & I've just never come across it?

[Zetetic]

Sardonyx.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Fair play risking syphilis just to not wear a condom is a real dedication to cuntiness.

Imagine ever thinking shagging a prostitute uncovered is ever a good idea.

[touchingcloth]

When my dad calls me imbecilic, am I displaying imbecility?

Wiktionary says there's a "sardonicism" and gives this example of its usage:

His sardonicism was getting on my nerves.

It also says that the word is "usually uncountable", so I'm not sure I fully trust it.

[touchingcloth]

Why did the British army send so many paratroopers during The Troubles when presumably the number of occasions when parachutes were needed was zero?

[Bennett Brauer]

When my dad calls me imbecilic, am I displaying imbecility?

Wiktionary says there's a "sardonicism" and gives this example of its usage:

It also says that the word is "usually uncountable", so I'm not sure I fully trust it.

Sardonicism is in Chambers dictionary and the OED. There's also the adjective sardonian, which can also be a noun - someone who's frequently sardonic. Would make a good username.

According to the OED, it derives from "the sardinian plant, which was said to kill by exciting laughter".

[Cold Meat Platter]

Why did the British army send so many paratroopers during The Troubles when presumably the number of occasions when parachutes were needed was zero?

For the same reasons the Marines invaded Iraq.

[gib]

How come lizards and snakes need to warm up in the sun before they can even move, yet fish have no problem swimming round in freezing cold water?

[touchingcloth]

For the same reasons the Marines invaded Iraq.

Which is that no one expects the air and sea units on land? Classic diversionary tactic.

[touchingcloth]

How come lizards and snakes need to warm up in the sun before they can even move, yet fish have no problem swimming round in freezing cold water?

They do have a problem, for the most part. The main answer is that fish have evolved to have a different heat requirement than lizards, so that something swimming in the Antarctic doesn't need to reach the same temperature as something scuttling round the Sahara, but a fish whose natural habitat is a certain temperature can't stay at a lower temperature for an extended period without needing to bask. Some fish also migrate like birds to avoid extremes of temperature.

[gib]

not your arctic fish then, just normal fish. At what point up the evolutionary ladder did the fish>amphibians>reptiles decide, you know what lads we don't need this gene that allows you to move about when it's 15 degrees C, bin that off?

[sponk]

In Hannibal when that bloke slices his face off then the dog eats it immediately. Why didn't the dog eat his face before he slices it off? How do dogs distinguish between flesh on a living person and a slice of flesh on the floor?

[touchingcloth]

not your arctic fish then, just normal fish. At what point up the evolutionary ladder did the fish>amphibians>reptiles decide, you know what lads we don't need this gene that allows you to move about when it's 15 degrees C, bin that off?

They didn't bin it off, they just got together and decided not to acquire it.

[touchingcloth]

What's a "normal" number of social media followers?

Whenever I see a "news" article talking about someone on The You Tube or The Face Grams with 10,000 or 1,000,000 or 1,000,000,000 or 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 followers I always wonder if the stated amount is surprisingly low, surprisingly high or about what you'd expect for someone on The Only Towie is a Footballer's Shore. Do those numbers somehow exclude the bots, which is what I assume the majority of followers any given person has are?

[Puce Moment]

How do records work? I think I understand digital recording, and I have a grasp of cassette/tape recording, but how the fuck can you mould a circle of plastic that contains the sounds of people singing and playing instruments? How does a diamond scraping across that plastic groove create that sound as it was when it was made?

I have never really ever grasped the strange magical process of playing a record, yet it appears to have been acheived a long time ago.

Wax cylinders? What the fuck? - don't even start.

[touchingcloth]

Have you ever watched the cone of a speaker moving while music's played? A record is just that but in reverse.

Digital and cassette recordings are massively complex in comparison.

[Darles Chickens]

Have you ever watched the cone of a speaker moving while music's played? A record is just that but in reverse.

Digital and cassette recordings are massively complex in comparison.

And the word "analogue" has the same roots as "analogy" - it refers to an alternative representation of a shape or signal.  In this case, the continuous movements of a speaker cone which give rise to the music are represented on the record groove in an analogous form.

(This is a simplification of course: stereo audio complicates things somewhat)

[NoSleep]

Why did the British army send so many paratroopers during The Troubles when presumably the number of occasions when parachutes were needed was zero?

I wonder how many other professions are named after the mode of transport they use to get to work (and not counting the many occasions that they don't)?

[Johnny Yesno]

I wonder how many other professions are named after the mode of transport they use to get to work (and not counting the many occasions that they don't)?

Perhaps it's nothing to do with their mode of transport but just a simple prefix of one of the following kinds:

• above, beyond
• beside, near, alongside; throughout
• abnormal, incorrect
• resembling

Incorrect troopers. Sounds about right to me.

[NoSleep]

Somebody else mentioned the Marines being deployed Iran. Does something like that apply for them, too?

[NoSleep]

Maybe other professions should follow suit: caraccountants, trainlawyers, etc.

[EBGB]

Sardonicism is in Chambers dictionary and the OED. There's also the adjective sardonian, which can also be a noun - someone who's frequently sardonic. Would make a good username.

According to the OED, it derives from "the sardinian plant, which was said to kill by exciting laughter".

Nice.  Thanks.

[poodlefaker]

Why is it so hard to recycle plastic? Can't they just melt it and make new things with it?

[NoSleep]

Some plastics can be recycled by rechipping it and using it to manufacture again. Of course you can't be choosy about what colour it's going to be. LDPE, HDPE and the vinyl used to make records can all be recycled. In the latter case you can tell when rechipped vinyl has been used as it tends to be full of dust and crackles like an old record from day one. Also, when you put an LP up to the light, it you can see what colour most of the rechipped material was made up from (if it wasn't black to start with). "Virgin vinyl" is, of course, preferable for high quality releases.

You can't do this with all plastics. The above mentioned are all thermoplastics that are melted down and molded or extruded. Other types, like nylon, are the result of chemical reactions, so would be more difficult to recycle.

[touchingcloth]

Perhaps it's nothing to do with their mode of transport but just a simple prefix of one of the following kinds:

• above, beyond
• beside, near, alongside; throughout
• abnormal, incorrect
• resembling

Incorrect troopers. Sounds about right to me.

Maybe that's the case sometimes, but I'm pretty sure any soldier referred to as a paratrooper during the Troubles was a parachutist. The British Parachute regiment, wiki tells me.

Of course this gets confusing when you note that the paratroopers were in conflict with paramilitaries who are para in one of your senses rather than the parachutes one.

[Puce Moment]

Have you ever watched the cone of a speaker moving while music's played? A record is just that but in reverse.

Digital and cassette recordings are massively complex in comparison.

That's cleared it up - cheers man!