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Is it middle class to extol the virtues of juniper body wash?

Started by pancreas, September 11, 2019, 09:31:26 PM

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pancreas


pancreas


Pingers


BlodwynPig

The answer is no. But Pancreas will br dreaming if my lithe form soaked in frothy juniper suds tonight

shiftwork2


BlodwynPig


Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth

Wouldn't it would make you smell like gin? People would think you were a piss artist.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth on September 11, 2019, 10:23:04 PM
Wouldn't it would make you smell like gin? People would think you were a piss artist.

Nope. Alcohol makes you smell like a piss artist. Juniper makes you smell divine. It rivals Bergerac as the greatest thing in my life.

Mr_Simnock

Quote from: pancreas on September 11, 2019, 09:31:26 PM
Cos BlodwynPig just did.

depends, is it a £2 aldi job or something from behind the counter at selfridges for £80 infused with bee oil, essence of ferret and myrrh?

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Mr_Simnock on September 11, 2019, 10:37:13 PM
depends, is it a £2 aldi job or something from behind the counter at selfridges for £80 infused with bee oil, essence of ferret and myrrh?

It was a small shampoo that i found in my wash bag when i lived in Canada but dont remember getting - probably hotel. I ran out of shampoo so tried it and was transported to a paradise no other will experience. A blend of melancholy and happiness from the 80s.

I have since sourced a make your own body wash stall in Eldon Square that uses juniper oil drops to scent neutral wash, but its far too chemically to come close to the original elixir

Buelligan

Didn't the mystery body wash bottle have a label?  I assume it did or how did you know it was body wash and not novichok?  Photograph the blessed vial and let us examine it for clues.  Thanks in advance.

Cuellar


Buelligan

I've just googled it and apparently there's quite a range of different juniper body washes available in the world.  I'd never thought about it until today.  Staggering really.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Buelligan on September 11, 2019, 10:56:06 PM
Didn't the mystery body wash bottle have a label?  I assume it did or how did you know it was body wash and not novichok?  Photograph the blessed vial and let us examine it for clues.  Thanks in advance.

It was shampoo and sadly i failed to note the brand or name for some bizarre reason

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Buelligan on September 11, 2019, 11:03:51 PM
I've just googled it and apparently there's quite a range of different juniper body washes available in the world.  I'd never thought about it until today.  Staggering really.

Makes you think

...

But removes the stink

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Buelligan on September 11, 2019, 11:03:51 PM
I've just googled it and apparently there's quite a range of different juniper body washes available in the world.  I'd never thought about it until today.  Staggering really.

If you can find a shampoo, maybe 50ml, transparent or semi transparent bottle, peach colour, i'll be happy to receive your message

Buelligan

Quote from: BlodwynPig on September 11, 2019, 11:05:56 PM
It was shampoo and sadly i failed to note the brand or name for some bizarre reason

You're an idiot, what did the bottle look like?

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Buelligan on September 11, 2019, 11:08:44 PM
You're an idiot, what did the bottle look like?

Described above. Perhaps fennellated with black cap

chveik

whatever makes blodwynpig happy. you've got myriads of scents for shampoons these days

BlodwynPig

Quote from: chveik on September 11, 2019, 11:12:06 PM
whatever makes blodwynpig happy. you've got myriads of scents for shampoons these days

Not like this they havent

Buelligan

I'm guessing it was this one (because this is a free in hotels one)

or a carrot and juniper dog shampoo.


checkoutgirl

Quote from: Mr_Simnock on September 11, 2019, 10:37:13 PM
depends, is it a £2 aldi job or something from behind the counter at selfridges for £80 infused with bee oil, essence of ferret and myrrh?

bee oil? that's funny.

bee oil.


pancreas

I don't think you're engaging with the substance of this. The point is that this purportedly estranged cunt is covering himself in 'smellies' and he thinks nothing of it. He thinks he's basically a blacklisted shipyard worker, hawking his cock for shillings down Sandgate-On-Tyne ... but actually what's happening is that he's at home, taking a 2 hour 50°C shower and smearing himself liberally with essence of juniper.

You see the issue.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Buelligan on September 11, 2019, 11:14:50 PM
I'm guessing it was this one (because this is a free in hotels one)

or a carrot and juniper dog shampoo.

May well be but more fennellated and no SPA. Worryingly it says only extract of juniper, whereas i was bathed in total juniper.

Ignore pancreas, he still uses creosote shampoo as a treat

touchingcloth

I bet if you showered in this stuff it would make you smell like gin! Did you shower in it all yourself?

Pingers

From the post-industrial horrors of Byker to the effete world of juniper shampoo usage, through the medium of mathematics. A grubby Geordie lad is discovered to have a talent for Big Sums and is propelled into a world of boutique personal grooming products. There's a British feel-good movie starring Jim Broadbent and Jimmy Nail right there, mark my words.

NJ Uncut

As a working class non-corporeal entity I take massive offence at this thread's question

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

What's that green one with mint or eucalyptus in it that makes your bell tingle? I like that.