Author Topic: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy  (Read 12131 times)

DoesNotFollow

  • Everybody in the whole of NASA was in the pork pie
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #150 on: January 07, 2020, 06:03:04 AM »
Neddy gets a vajazzle.

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #151 on: January 08, 2020, 01:31:32 AM »
"Saturday night, quick aperitif, stick a bit of Coldplay on the stereo, leather jacket on, splash of Hugo Boss, hit the hip spots in town!"



Clothes by BHS. Hair by Barry the hair dresser round the corner.

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #152 on: January 10, 2020, 04:16:26 AM »
"Any protests marches against Trump I can go on?"

"That's not a proper job, Ned. Now you're here at the job centre because you got sacked for neglecting your duties at the office. Don't you think it"s time to grow up?"

"DOWN WITH SYSTEM MAN! Don't trust anyone over 30!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #153 on: January 11, 2020, 08:36:33 AM »
Neddy dresses up a Ali G for his niece's 21st. "This'll give the kids a scream, I'll do a bit of a rap and all!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #154 on: January 13, 2020, 07:52:47 PM »
"Harry and Megs need a break, I know what its like to be young and active as I am myself still young and active."

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #155 on: January 19, 2020, 07:57:03 PM »
"Simply Red LP, glass of wine, feet in the foot spa... this is how I rock a Friday night!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #156 on: January 22, 2020, 04:45:41 AM »
Ned goes on an anti-pollution march in London. "Couldn't give two fucks about the environment tbh, but apparently it's the cool thing to do!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #157 on: January 24, 2020, 07:38:37 AM »
Ned's in the queue for a Radiohead show. "They're m'favourite modern rock act," he tells the woman in front of him. "Fingers crossed they play 'Wonderwall' - what a track!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #158 on: January 28, 2020, 04:07:13 PM »
"Hey guys, check out m'new iPhone, it's amazeballs! Just gonna chillax, life is an omnishambles!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #159 on: January 29, 2020, 06:29:20 AM »
Ned has only just gotten around to "completing the Cornetto movies," having at last caught The World's End on Netflix. "That is absolutely me and my mates, man, fack! Haha!!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #160 on: January 30, 2020, 07:07:28 AM »
Ned takes a day off work "because I've come down with road rage. It's the new thing, they're all at it!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #161 on: January 30, 2020, 07:35:23 PM »
Ned does a local radio competition and wins a ticket to a Razorlight concert for his niece, who is a big fan, but it turns out that she can't go that night. "Not to worry, I'll fill in for yah, Leticia! Yeah, baby, yeah!

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #162 on: January 31, 2020, 07:29:28 AM »
"Hello, Microsoft helpline? I'd like to enquire about Twerk U."

"Sorry, sir?"

"Twerk U."

"Oh wait I think you mean Tweak UI, sir. I think you mean Tweak UI."

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #163 on: March 19, 2020, 01:29:00 PM »
"Pfft, this whole corono thing is a con. Bloody nanny state, they're just trying to ruin everyone a fun! It's just like the smoking ban, these 'millenials' overreacting to everything!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #164 on: March 20, 2020, 07:27:21 AM »
"Gonna sing on the balcony like the Italians. Pop on some Genesis, strip naked and away I go!"

Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #165 on: March 20, 2020, 09:27:33 AM »
"Dunno why, but I've gotta go to The Zoo for a video conference. Seems a bit silly to me, I'll make sure not to eat any Chinese Bats though!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #166 on: March 20, 2020, 10:43:01 AM »
"When I was young...ger, we never washed our hands. These kids have left themselves open to covids with this 'OCD' nonsense!"

"Sir, the office is closed for the foreseeable future. Please go home and isolate yourself."

"Righto, mister security guard! Hey, it's like Threads, this! You're old enough to remember Threads, aren't you? Well, we're not old, but..."

Better Midlands

  • I'm not internationally known
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #167 on: March 20, 2020, 01:09:17 PM »
"Crazy times, this is our 9/11"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #168 on: March 22, 2020, 02:10:41 PM »
"Sick and tired of all this fuss over a mild bloody cold bug. If you want me I'll be in Weatherspoons enjoying the best of British foods, washed down with many pints of Bass! And I ain't washin' me hands, neither!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #169 on: March 24, 2020, 10:21:22 AM »
"Just ordered a jukebox. Gonna fill it with all the classic discs, 'In the Air Tonight',  'Kayleigh', 'Go Your Own Way'... I'm still in my thirties at heart! And speaking of 'Heart'..."

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #170 on: March 24, 2020, 11:10:56 PM »
Ned decides to become an observational stand-up.

"Don't you just hate it when your ex-wife is nagging you for child support and you're trying to read up about the most powerful gaming PCs?"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #171 on: March 25, 2020, 10:03:45 AM »
"Dad, why are we in Forbidden Planet again?"

"Look, just shut up, right? Your Mother is collecting you at four, then you can go home to your new, 'better' dad."

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #172 on: March 26, 2020, 02:16:15 AM »
"People don't build sound systems anymore. This saddens me."

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #173 on: March 26, 2020, 11:04:07 AM »
"Guys, I'll be live-broadcasting from home this afternoon on my laptop. So to all of you out in YouTubeland, stay tuned for some exciting pop culture chat. Wakanda forever!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #174 on: March 26, 2020, 04:59:10 PM »
"Here Ned, Toyah is playing tonight, I think there's some tickets left... d'you fancy going?"

"Toyah?!? Never heard of her, Interested-in-Eighties-Pop Ian!"

"Oh come on, you must have... how do you know Toyah is a 'her'?"

"Actually, though obviously taken from her name, before she went solo her whole band was known as 'Toyah'... oh shit, I've truly given meself away now. Fair enough, get me a ticket. I hope she does 'Jungles of Jupiter'."

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #175 on: March 26, 2020, 10:30:42 PM »
"You're only as old as you feel. Well I still feel like a thirtysomething, so Mr. DJ, rock a good tune while I chug this Monster!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #176 on: March 27, 2020, 10:08:39 AM »
"Pfft, 'dinner parties' are so passé! My soirees involve bean-bag seats, alcopops and chicken dippers! Sorted!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #177 on: March 28, 2020, 03:50:08 AM »
"Just bought an Apple watch - didn't even want one! But that's how Ned rolls."

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #178 on: March 28, 2020, 11:42:35 AM »
"100 inch 4K telly, VR headset on... watch out, kids, this ol' dinosaur is keepin' up with the times!"

Glebe

  • This is a low-flying panic attack.
Re: Not Accepting Middle Age Neddy
« Reply #179 on: March 29, 2020, 02:22:49 PM »
"If it's not a vegan smoothie I ain't drinking it."

Tags: