Your favourite pathetic/vile/lowlife comedy characters

[Blue Jam]

Not much of Hans beats some of the stuff he came out with in his introductory episode

"Got to fax my soul off to God - for an upgrade" (then laughs at his own remark while lounging on someone else's bed in his shoes)
"We are going to have parties in here that go beyond fun...and actually get really nasty"
"What you doing there is - you're drinking an advert, aintcha - shithead"
"Tell you what, how about as a fucking off present, we spike him?"

Funnier as an absolutely reprehensible towny piece of shit than the overly broad wisecracking, seen it all before oddball he was turned into.

For me, Super Hans is at his scummy best in Shrooming:

Trying to make Big Suze have a bad trip with "You're on the edge and you've got to pick the right way, because one way's Heaven, and the other way... well, it's best not to think about that now, but it's FUCKIN' 'ORRIBLE."

His advice to Big Suze when she's feeling a bit sick and dizzy: "Have another dose"

Best/worst of all:
"''shrooming changed my life. Before I started 'shrooming I was stuck at the HSBC doing the 9-to-5..."
"...and now you've got your room at the centre and you're making your masks..."

[NJ Uncut]

I did like it when Super Hans was more than just a drug dude. Shoplifting and logos in the foam, he's a thicko countercultural hipster goof, rather than Muffin the fucking Drugs Mule

Grindah!

[Blue Jam]

Martin Mucklowe from This Country, the dirty peeper:

"The next thing you know you get a call from the police who say they've got CCTV footage that absolutely nails you, and your DNA all over a tennis racket cover."

[Blue Jam]

Grindah is a bastard all right. Both him and Martin Mucklowe are also characters with absolutely no sense of humour.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

Alan Partridge.

[Sebastian Cobb]

For me, Super Hans is at his scummy best in Shrooming:

Trying to make Big Suze have a bad trip with "You're on the edge and you've got to pick the right way, because one way's Heaven, and the other way... well, it's best not to think about that now, but it's FUCKIN' 'ORRIBLE."

His advice to Big Suze when she's feeling a bit sick and dizzy: "Have another dose"

Best/worst of all:
"''shrooming changed my life. Before I started 'shrooming I was stuck at the HSBC doing the 9-to-5..."
"...and now you've got your room at the centre and you're making your masks..."

I just want to be in a controlled environment, have a coke, a tuna sandwich and mong out to some Snow Patrol

[mojo filters]

Roy Mallard in John Morton's magnificent mockumentary People Like Us.

[Twed]

Arthur Daley. So lovable.

[sponk]

Politican is lowlife comedy character. Bunch of 🤡

[Twit 2]

Frank in Always Sunny.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

All of the gang, really.

Marsha from Spaced's finest moment wasn't a line, but the time she creeps up next to Brian like she's going to stick her tongue in his ear. Speaking of whom - Brian is excellently pathetic.

[Blue Jam]

Everyone in Trailer Park Boys is a pathetic vile lowlife.

[monkfromhavana]

Biscuity Boyle from Burnistown.
I loved Bob Servant when it was on, I always loved Alex Norton playing Hendo.

[alan nagsworth]

Surely Jeff is more of a worthy candidate than Super Hans. He is a spiteful bully of playground proportions, sniggering and mocking Mark for the amusement of his peers, but underneath it he's a weak, snivelling little shit, crying into Sophie's clothes when she breaks up with him, just a snotty lump of repressed sadness and childish lashing out. He's also got a truly loathsome shit-eating grin and his delivery of "there's no threat from you pal. You can have your cock in her, you still wouldn't have the balls to fuck" is one of the nastiest things I think any villain in a comedy has ever said. And he's a seat sniffer.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

Jeff is just nasty though. Super Hans is dickish, but he's entertainingly larger than life and motivated by hedonism, rather than malice. Jeff could easily be the villain on a soap opera.

The apex of Jeff's shittiness was when he sneered about raising Mark's baby.

[Blue Jam]

Yes, Jeff isn't half as charming or entertaining as Super Hans. A night out with either of them could go beyond fun and end up getting really nasty, but with Super Hans you'd at least have some entertaining stories to tell. "You passed out after the love beans, you thought the table was being ironic" is more amusing than Jeff cheating on Sophie with a random woman in the pub, at least.

Bit nebulous this innit. We've gone from charming sleazebags to lovable rogues to properly loathsome individuals in one thread. What are all the types of pathetic/vile lowlives?

[alan nagsworth]

What are all the types of pathetic/vile lowlives?

Unsure but if there's a scale I reckon I'd be about a 6.2

[Blue Jam]

Louis Litt in Suits:

https://youtu.be/sMz9lymbyuc

He's horrible. I love him.

[markburgle]

Alan Roderick Statham (nice initials). The most perfectly Mark Heap character. His barely repressed rage, pomposity, florid vocabulary ("Decant it! Into another receptacle!"), and occasional impish attempts at humour that never land. His mouth all the time clenched as tight as his arsehole must be.

[kalowski]

Alan Roderick Statham (nice initials). The most perfectly Mark Heap character. His barely repressed rage, pomposity, florid vocabulary ("Decant it! Into another receptacle!"), and occasional impish attempts at humour that never land. His mouth all the time clenched as tight as his arsehole must be.

"Peewit!"
"Wanker"



Loved the coffee enema too.

[PlanktonSideburns]

bosto

[Cold Meat Platter]

Have we had Palin's Ken Shabby? Classic Palin grotesque.
Is that also supposed to be him in the Visitors sketch where Cleese as Brian Equator barges in on Chapman and Cleveland?
"I had to bring the goat, he's not well. I only hope he don't go on the carpet."

[Nice Relaxing Poo]

How the hell have so many people replied to this thread and i'm the first to say Constanza?!

And you're the only person so far which is even more surprising.


I've been watching Seinfeld again and he is just such a piece of work. Peel back a layer of lies and neurosis and there's another waiting to fuck everything up, what a worm of a man.

[bgmnts]

They're all shitbags in Seinfeld though, maybe doesn't stand out as much?

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

Months and months and nobody, not one person said Patsy Stone?

She leeches off her friend for drug money. She encourages Eddie's worst excesses. She's jealous of a child. She drinks and drugs constantly. She had a stomach bypass and hasn't eaten anything since 1974 in order to stay thin. It's hinted throughout the series that she was only technically a model in that a friend of hers (who later claims "I barely know her" when she fucks up) got her a job. She insists she's "39" even though she's old enough to draw a pension. And we love her because it's glamorous, actual Bond girl Joanna Lumley who's staggering out of cars and into graves and calling people "little bitch trolls from hell" before burning them with her cigarette.

[phes]

And you're the only person so far which is even more surprising.


I've been watching Seinfeld again and he is just such a piece of work. Peel back a layer of lies and neurosis and there's another waiting to fuck everything up, what a worm of a man.

Thanks, I've been sitting here ploughing through S2 of Six Feet Under and thinking this just isn't very good at all, why am I watching this. Seinfeld. There is always Seinfeld! George is indeed an utterly wretched human being. He and Elaine are probably on a par, though she gets away with it a little more on account of being more attractive and less pathetic. 

[lipsink]

Finchy from The Office is a fucking vile character. He does the impossible and makes you root for Brent. Not sure if he qualifies for this though as he seems pretty successful in his worklife and with the ladies. But he's a sad little man really.

[hummingofevil]

I would argue that almost every comedy is based around what is essentially the same hubristic, delusional character but Ignatius J. Reilly is probably my favourite version of it. He is such a dick but manages to do it within a limit where he is really doing any harm to anyone (except maybe his mother - but she made him that way so...)

[Andy147]

Have we had Palin's Ken Shabby? Classic Palin grotesque.
Is that also supposed to be him in the Visitors sketch where Cleese as Brian Equator barges in on Chapman and Cleveland?
"I had to bring the goat, he's not well. I only hope he don't go on the carpet."

Palin's character in the Visitors sketch is called "Mr Cook" in the script.

[Len Pounds]

Lionel Hutz! Not particularly vile, but a lovably pathetic lowlife!